《till forever falls apart | Taylor Swift》51
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August was okay during the day for the most part. Thanks to Andrea, she was kept busy and distracted ever since she had woken up until she had curled up in bed.
She had a brief call with her family as they wished her a happy birthday and they caught up for a few minutes until they went their separate ways to start their individual day.
August had gone grocery shopping with Andrea and when they had gotten back, she helped her make sandwiches for lunch with some freshly squeezed lemonade and bake some cookies for later while Taylor had to meet with her management team and producers, and other people, relating to her job and the new album she was releasing.
She was fine with it. Andrea did not treat her like a stranger at all. In fact, she had grown very warm toward her this past week and had started treating her like she did her own kids. August was more than happy to help out around the house, even when she had made sure to mention that she was a fire hazard when it came to cooking. She stuck to everything that could have been made off the stove, and even then, she struggled a little bit. But eventually, Taylor joined them in the kitchen and she helped her out after teasing her a little.
They had a lazy day, sitting around the small pool in the backyard and tossing a ball for the dogs until they had dinner and sat by the television watching some Friends reruns. Every time Taylor let out a giggle, she would turn to look at her and smile. Sometimes, Taylor caught her looking and she would scrunch her nose and turn back to the television, and August would blush and not look away for a good few moments.
But at around midnight, they all went up to their own rooms and August sat in bed with Phoebe, listening to her own thoughts and an owl outside her window.
She was restless.
She couldn't stop replaying that night in her head. Over, and over again. She had thought that it was going good, being out here with Taylor, far away from home. But maybe being alone wasn't such a good idea.
August pulled out her phone and opened up her messages with Taylor when a knock came at her door. She put her phone down again and frowned. "Come in," she said softly.
The door opened and Taylor stood there clad in an oversized t-shirt and some plaid pyjama pants. Her hair was tied back in a low pony tail and she looked unbelievably soft holding a plate of cookies in one hand and a small box in the other.
"Can I come in?" She asked quietly. "I didn't wake you, did I?"
August snorted and shook her head, sitting up in bed. She turned the bedside lamp on so she could see Taylor better. The blonde smiled and closed the door behind her as she stepped inside.
"I wasn't gonna get any sleep tonight, anyway," August mumbled softly. A look she couldn't quite decipher crossed Taylor's face but she had quickly recovered and sat down at the foot of the bed. "I was about to text you actually, to see if you were still up."
"Were you?" Taylor looked genuinely surprised. "I guess you summoned me."
August chuckled and reached over to grab a cookie from the plate even though she had already brushed her teeth. Andrea's peanut butter cookies were mouthwatering.
"I guess I did," she whispered softly.
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Taylor smiled down at the box in her hand and then silently handed it over to August who took it hesitantly. "What's that?"
"Just open it."
August raised an eyebrow questioningly as she slowly opened the box. She was all the more confused when she saw a USB inside.
August chuckled quietly and looked up weirdly at Taylor. "Oh, gee, thanks. I really needed something to save all my computer files on."
Taylor rolled her eyes at August's sarcasm and nudged her shoulder playfully with her own. "The actual gift is already saved on it, dummy."
"Wow, I'm so lucky, receiving both a gift and being called a dummy!" August said, her grin slowly widening.
"Will you just—" Taylor huffed in frustration, and they both laughed softly. "Just get your computer."
August's curiosity did get the best of her. She crawled out of bed, going to her backpack and pulling her laptop out. As she inserted the USB into the port and waited for the laptop to read it, she wondered what Taylor might have thought was worth giving her (on an external device).
"Is it a bunch of pictures you've taken of me without my knowing?" August teased and Taylor wiggled her eyebrows in response.
"No, there's only three of those."
"What's the last one?" August's eyes widened in surprise.
"When you fell asleep at my place that one time you'd stayed up all night writing Till Forever Falls Apart," Taylor explained and before August could even react to that and demand to be shown that picture, she pointed at the screen. "Which reminds me! Come on, open it!"
August clicked on it tentatively and waited anxiously as it loaded. When the file finally opened, there was only one thing saved on it. A single mp3 file titled "
August sighed heavily. "Niko told you, didn't he?"
Taylor looked a little sheepish. "I was supposed to change the name... shit."
August chuckled, shaking her head. "That's fine," she clicked on the audio file. "Thank you, anyway but—"
She cut herself off when the familiar notes of the song started playing.
She turned to look at Taylor with her mouth hanging open and clapped her hand against it when she saw Taylor's wide and nervous grin.
"Is that...?" She whispered softly and Taylor nodded.
"The first official master of your song," Taylor confirmed. "Jack sent it to me earlier. He was going to wait another few days to add a few finishing touches but I made him kind of forget everything else he had to work on and focus on 'Till Forever Falls Apart for us."
August let out a small, incredibly high-pitched sound as she heard her voice coming through the speaker, sounding smooth and clear as opposed to all the recordings she had of herself singing that same verse on her phone. The two of them had recorded their vocals for the song in Taylor's makeshift bedroom studio just after having written it with the help of Laura and Jack. A few days later, August recorded the piano and guitar bits on her own using her own equipment at home. The same shitty equipment she had used years ago to record all of her student projects, and everything else since then. They had sounded pretty good, but with Jack's help, the final product sounded ethereal.
August could already feel the tears pricking her eyes when Taylor's voice came in on the second verse.
"We literally sound so good," she said and burst out laughing ecstatically.
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"I know, we really do!" Taylor agreed, leaning in closer to August's side and wrapping an arm around her shoulders. August nuzzled into her side smiling widely.
"I can't believe I'm actually listening to this right now," August whispered, still in shock.
"Believe it, because this is definitely going to be a huge hit," Taylor told her, giving her shoulder a comforting squeeze.
"Only because you're singing on it," August chuckled softly and to her surprise, Taylor took her hand and laced their fingers together.
"That's not true. I knew it was a hit song the moment you played it to me," Taylor said. "Even if I didn't sing on it with you, I know it would still sell millions."
August could feel a blush creeping up her cheeks. She squeezed Taylor's hand and buried her face in her shoulder. "I can't believe this is actually real."
Taylor smiled widely and nuzzled August's hair. "Believe it, Auggie. You're about to make history with this single."
To both their surprise, August sat up and shook her head. "No, this is not the single."
"No?" Taylor asked with an eyebrow raised. "Do you have one in mind?"
"I have a whole album in mind," she answered with a little smile and Taylor sat up, facing her, the shock evident in her face.
"And why am I just hearing about this?" Taylor asked and August shrugged sheepishly.
"I don't know... I've been going through my old song journal and, I just started coming up with ideas and I have this whole album planned. It would be called August. Just that. And it would be around ten songs maybe, and the songs would just follow each other. A whole story told by this continuous piece of music. Each track goes into the other perfectly, like a puzzle piece, or kind of like a perfect, super long medley. Think Dark Side of the Moon or Abbey Road. Just one continuous story told through a series of songs. So, I don't know if I should release singles from it. At least, not until after the album comes out, because it would be an experience. You can't shuffle it, or it wouldn't make sense. You would want to listen to it from the first track till the last one, with just the perfect intermission on the middle track for the vinyl when you would have to turn it over."
Taylor was watching in fascination as August rambled on, explaining her idea and when she was done, she had a bright and fond smile on her face.
"You can't really expect me to believe you came up with that idea just recently," she said and August let out a laugh.
"Okay, I may have dabbled into it a little when I was still in school but... I never really seriously thought about it. Not until I had written Till Forever Falls Apart, which ideally should be the opening track for the album."
Taylor let out a breath through her nose and shook her head at August. "I swear, you amaze me more and more every day, August James."
August could only blush some more.
"Do you know what the first single would be, though?" Taylor asked and August nodded lightly.
"Kinda," she cleared her throat softly. "Uh, I mean, I wrote it about a year ago. But I can't get myself to really finish it. I do have the ideas though."
Taylor suddenly got up and held her hands out. "Come on, then."
"Why...?" August asked suspiciously and Taylor grabbed her hands and pulled her out from under the covers.
"The piano downstairs," Taylor said, already pulling her toward the stairs.
"Your mom's probably asleep," August whispered but Taylor didn't seem to care.
"She can't hear us from downstairs, c'mon!" She dragged August all the way to the piano in the drawing room downstairs. It wasn't as heavily equipped as Taylor's music room back in L.A. but it still had a pretty awesome grand piano.
"Dude, I can't exactly play when you're pressuring me like this," August grumbled as Taylor turned the lights on.
"Do you want me to leave?" Taylor asked and August could tell she wasn't being serious but even then, she looked up and shook her head.
"No," she murmured and went to sit down at the piano. Taylor closed the door softly and came to join August.
August took in a shaky breath and placed her fingers over the cold white keys.
And as soon as she played the first note, she felt herself overcome with emotions. She felt the urge to drop her hands back to her lap but when she met Taylor's eyes from across the room, she encouraged her to keep playing.
"So, I never really knew you,
God, I tried you,
Blindsided, addicted
Thought we could really do this
But really I was foolish
Hindsight, it's obvious..."
August looked up for a moment and Taylor was watching her curiously, but also reassuringly. She continued, her voice only slightly shakier.
"Talking with my lawyer
She said, "Where'd you find this guy?"
I said, "Young people fall in love
With the wrong people sometimes"
August chuckled bitterly as she sang the words and when she looked up again, she found that Taylor had straightened up and was frowning at her. And with another shaky sigh, she jumped into the chorus.
Some mistakes get made
That's alright, that's okay
You can think that you're in love
When you're really just in pain
Some mistakes get made
That's alright, that's okay
In the end, it's better for me
That's the moral of the story, babe
Her voice broke at the end and she dropped her hands into her lap, staring deeply at the last key she had struck as the sound of the notes resonated in the air around the room for a few moments more.
Taylor walked tentatively toward August and sat down next to her on the bench.
"Is it..." she started but cut herself off. "About yourself?"
August was reluctant at first but when she did nod, she was still staring down at her hands. "Uh, yeah," she chuckled softly, rubbing at her eye with the back of her hand. "Kinda."
"Does it have to do with, you know...?"
August figured Niko had mentioned to Taylor that this particular day was especially sensitive to her. She took it a deep breath and shrugged.
"Kind of? It's more of a cherry on top type of situation. Rotten cherry."
There was a lot more to that story...
"I'm sorry, I pushed you to come down here and—"
August turned around and grabbed Taylor's hand in hers, squeezing it. "No, don't apologise. This is actually... nice. It's probably therapeutic or something to get this stuff out in a song."
"Yeah, tell me about it," Taylor muttered and they both shared a small smile.
"What did Niko tell you, exactly?" August asked, her thumb moving over the back of Taylor's hand in slow circles.
"Nothing, really," Taylor answered. "He just said that it was your birthday and asked me to keep an eye on you because it was an emotional day. He didn't go into any more details."
"Yeah, emotional is an understatement," August let out a dry laugh. "Maybe I should finally get this stuff off my chest."
"Only if you're ready," Taylor responded softly.
August cleared her throat. "The past three years have been... fucked up, to say the least. Uh, early last year, I kinda went through a pretty rough break-up. It was I think the hardest year of my life. I just kinda packed everything, filed for a divorce, and left to tour with my old band. Pretty much months after I should have actually done so. It all happened around this time last year, actually. Which also happened to be around the same time my uh, since the anniversary of... Since Ryne had passed away. My older brother."
Taylor's eyes slowly widened and her grip in August's hand tightened. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. "I know it doesn't mean anything but... I'm sorry you had to go through all of that."
August smiled at her and shrugged her shoulders. "It's okay. I'm... doing better. For the most part."
August could tell Taylor was still trying to wrap her mind around it all. It was kind of cute how her brows met in the middle.
"Yeah, it's kind of really fucked up right?" She chuckled, trying to keep the mood light. "Ryne passed away just a few days after my birthday a few years ago. He relapsed at a party and... he didn't make it. Uhm, and then Justin turned out to be the worst person to lean on for support but... I don't know, I don't wanna get into that. He's in the past. I don't even understand how everything went to shit so fast but it did, and I'm still here and my life's slowly getting back together. But yeah, that's why I moved in with my parents just before the pandemic. We needed to be there for each other."
"Grey's anatomy, huh?" Taylor murmured and August burst out laughing, remembering the conversation they had had a week ago when Taylor had invited her to come to Nashville wifh her.
"Yeah, and I totally just told you the whole story a hundred percent sober," August chuckled and Taylor rubbed the back of her hand softy.
"I'm really glad you told me," Taylor said quietly and pulled August in for a hug. "Thank you for trusting me. I had no idea you were going through all of that."
August smiled and buried her face in Taylor's neck as she hugged her back tightly. "Thank you for always being there for me."
When Taylor pulled away eventually, she turn to face the piano and nudged August's shoulder softly. "What other songs do you have to complete that storyline you were talking about?"
August thought for a moment. She did already have most of the songs written. She turned to smile at Taylor before playing the piano again.
She hummed for the first few measures, a soft and slow melody, more classical than her usual indie leaning style. It sounded a little like a lullaby and Taylor leaned closer to her as she started singing.
Je te laisserai des mots
En-dessous de ta porte
En-dessous de la lune qui chante
Tout près de la place où tes pieds passent
Cachés dans les trous d'un temps d'hiver
Et quand tu es seule pendant un instant...
[literal translation: I will leave you some words, under your door, under the moon that sings, near the place where your feet walk, hidden under the holes of a wintery time, and when you're all alone for a moment.... ]
Taylor let out a soft gasp, surprised as the words tumbled out of August in French.
Embrasse-moi
Quand tu voudras
[Kiss me whenever you would like to]
August turned and their eyes met. She hadn't realised just how close they were sitting until that moment. With her eyes still caught in Taylor's heavy gaze, she continued singing, this time, her voice much gentler.
Embrasse-moi
Quand tu voudras
And when she repeated the line again, Taylor's soft lips brushed against hers.
August froze. Her hands stopped moving on the piano keys and she even felt her heart pause.
Taylor pulled away just a mere second later, but it was enough to pull August out of her trance. She followed Taylor, catching her lips in a kiss, a real one this time.
Taylor's hands instantly wrapped around her waist, pulling August into her. They kissed until August's lungs started burning, begging for air, and Taylor seemed to feel the same because she had finally pulled back and taken in a shaky breath.
"Oh my god," August whispered.
"Oh my god," Taylor repeated, a small, ghost of a smile, traced on her face.
———
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