As if cleaning isn't hard enough. Add asinine requests and a person who makes you wish you could just fall off the ladder rather than have to finish their cleaning. I was called by a new couple to a nicer area in town. So I bit at it thinking it was easy money.

When I got there I meet an older man who seemed quite polite and hard-working himself. A beautiful spacious home.

She wasn't around for the bid or first meeting.

We went through the usual, and he said he'd love me to come and clean. We agreed on a day and I was to come back prepared for a full house clean.

When I arrived at our scheduled appointment, it took forever to answer the door. I almost assumed it was a blow and I'd be off for the day.

Nope.

A woman answers, seemingly disheveled but in great spirits and smiling widely. She comes off as the artist type. You know has ADHD, and is completely ambivalently extra busy for no reason at all other than to just keep going. Paint on their shoes and elbow type.

"Hi, I'm Allie. I'm here to clean for you", I said politely.

"I've NEVER had a cleaner. I don't know you and I don't trust you. And my husband hired you. Not me, ok?", she blurted out.

"Yes ma'am, I understand", I replied.

After I got to the living room, she had about 500,000 Kachina dolls to move and dust around. I painstakingly made my way through them and was going into the second living room.

She stops me and says, "did you move everything in the living room and dust underneath everything?".

"Yes ma'am, I did", I said.

"You didn't have enough time to do all that", she revolted toward me.

Her entire demeanor changed. Like the Poltergeist, yes exactly like that. The scowl on her face was priceless.

If looks could kill, I'd be dead.

"Ma'am, I assure you. Please go and look for yourself. I am thorough as well as fast. I've been doing this awhile and take pride in my work", I replied.

"You're a liar", she was almost yelling at me by this point. I'm almost in utter shock. And what the hell?

"I'm going to check my cameras right now. If you are lying, I want you out of my house immediately", she said storming off to check her cameras.

I knew I did it the right way so I continued in the second living room and kept on cleaning. By the time she came back, I was three rooms over scrubbing a toilet.

She said nothing. No apology. Nothing.

How disrespectful?!

I could've stolen the entire time she was checking her cameras for my work. Rather than say she was sorry and I did a good job. Nothing?

I made my way to the basement. Which was fully carpeted from corner to corner. I always do this lined pattern so you can see it was freshly vacuumed. Similar to how upper-class hotels leave their carpeted floors with a reassuring pattern.

She came down just as I was winding the vacuum and said, "you didn't vacuum all the rooms the vaccuum wasn't running long enough".

She didn't even go in them physically and even check before saying that to me. Callous, rude, b...

I was just done. Nope. No, thank you.

I finished that clean, wasn't too excited to reschedule, but did.

When I returned two weeks later she was so nice to me, at first. Made cookies, and even smoked a cigarette with me on a break I normally wouldn't take because the job was only three hours long. She was kind of cool. But flip-flopped on her attitude, a lot.

Not to be trusted.

One minute happy she loves vanilla flavored coffee, the next she is upset because the dog already got hair on the clean chair covers. As well as the plastic floor protector, under the living room chill chair.

"Could you re-vaccum that area real quick before you go?", she asked.

I knew all of the marbles weren't in the jar. But not for me to judge. Just scrub away. Dust, dust, and mop. Go. Go.

I finished the bathroom in her master suite and I was packing up to leave. She handed me a check short, $20.00!

"Ma'am, it's $135.00 for biweekly services at 3,800 Sq. Ft. with pets as agreed in our contract. This check is $110.00", I said firmly.

"I know, you didn't dust properly last time you were here", she was very catty and pretentious when she said that to me.

I wanted to yell. I didn't. I left, politely. And never went back. Ever.

A bit later down life's road her husband and I bumped into each other at the supermarket. He asked why he couldn't keep a housecleaner to save his life.

I didn't want to be the one to say it, but I did. He explained to me that she was schizophrenic and didn't have much control over herself. Which I assumed.

I just left it there.

And never went back.