Drew POV

After debating and fighting with my Dad for what felt like hours, here I stood, in Hunter's house, well technically our house.

I walked around the house and looked it. It was actually a beautiful house, that had a huge back yard, with a tall mulberry tree. I chuckled slightly upon seeing it, remembering the first time I climbed one and wondering just why Hunter had one planted in the back yard, not that I was going to ask him that.

Unfortunately that also brought back the memories of Elliot. How he had bandaged my leg and called me a strong little wolf, even though I felt so weak in that moment. I could feel my eyes begin to burn, but I fought the tears and refused to let them fall.

I walked up the stairs and found myself standing in the middle of the bed room. How I ended up there though I have no idea.

I sighed and thought as I looked at the huge bed in the middle of the room.

There was no way I was going to be sleeping in the same room with him.

I turned around to leave, and found him standing in the doorway, blocking my exit and staring intently at me.

"Where are you going?" He asked.

"I'm sleeping in a different room." I said as I tried to push past him only for him to block my way and not even move. He looked right at me, his eyes holding nothing but hatred.

"Why? We should at least consummate our bond tonight during the full moon" he said as he stood in my way, advancing toward me.

"Like hell we are! You're not going to touch me" I replied backing away a bit, when I saw his face contour into different kinds of emotions, most of which I couldn't even begin to decipher, except one.

Rage. Pure, raw rage, and a dangerous one at that. His eyes resembled those that I saw as a child, those emotionless and heartless eyes. I turned around to go the bathroom when he spoke.

"Stop"

He had spoken in his Alpha tone, a tone or rather a voice given by the Goddess herself to non other than the Alpha of our kind. It was such a voice filled with raw power that forced any wolf into submission no matter the rank, giving me no choice but to submit. I stopped in my tracks, unable to move. Every fiber of my being came a still, as much as I hated it, it was like my body wasn't my own in that moment. It was under his control and his mercy. Which being the heartless bastard that he was, I was so sure he had none.

I turned around to face to him and look into those merciless eyes. He glared at me with enough intensity to ignite pure fear in just about anyone. I had been trained to feel no fear and yet in that moment I just felt like running for my life. He didn't just look angry, he looked downright murderous, seemingly wanting to strangle me where I stood. He advanced towards me and leaned his head in, sniffing me. I flinched just by his closeness to me, but I was unable to move. I heard a brief sigh emanating from him as if he found something pleasant in my scent. I however did not have a second longer to ponder over it, for as quick as I had picked it up, it had disappeared, replaced by his angry growl once again.

"Take your clothes off "

I tried to so hard to resist the command he was giving me, but him speaking in his Alpha voice was making it so difficult. Resisting his voice felt like my head was going to explode. Every part of my body ached to obey the command of its Alpha.

He seemed to be out of patience, and walked towards me and ripped off every piece of clothing that served as protection from him. I tried to push him away, but it was like some unknown force was holding me down and I couldn't move unless he told me too.

I just stared past him at the wall behind behind him, my teeth gritting as the tears rolled down my face. I willed myself to stop crying, to be stronger than this and yet it seemed easier said than done.

After he seemed to have ripped away my clothing, he looked at my tears and for a brief moment I saw something flash in his eyes. I couldn't make it out, but it was definitely something other than rage. It was something that I hadn't ever seen in his eyes before. He looked at me for a moment before he looked away, his jaw clenching. Something about the way he wouldn't meet my eyes when he spoke told me a different story.

"You're crying. I don't want to see it. Turn around."

Since I had no control of my body, I complied with his every command without hesitation. He walked into me, his chest pressed against my back as he pushed me against the bed. I could hear him removing his clothing. I felt the bed bend and I knew he was getting on it. I closed my eyes as I felt a knot in my throat begin to form but I refused to utter a single sound.

"Please don't, don't do this, not like this" I said hoping that he would have some sense and listen to me. He trailed his fingers down my spine, the action itself having my wolf squirm around inside me.

"I bet you loved it when he touched you, when he ravished you-" he leaned down and whispered in my ear as he pressed a kiss against the side of my neck. "When he fucked you, now you're going to scream for me".

I widened my eyes upon realizing his intentions, the way his voice dripped with hatred for me. I tried to jerk away from him but he held me down. I tried to tell him what he thought had happened all those years ago didn't actually happen at least not in the way the way he thought, and yet every time I tried to speak, that knot only tightened further. Somehow he ended up being stronger than me, and his Alpha strength didn't make it any easier to withstand his power. In the midst of my mental battle he entered me roughly and fully, without easing is way in. I understood that my being a rare wolf meant that I was supposed to take this role, but that didn't make the pain any less. Him not taking the time to ease me into it, only added onto that pain. I gritted my teeth and gripped onto the sheets so tightly, they ripped in my grasp as he pulled out and pushed back into me without thinking twice about it. He hadn't even waited for me to get accustomed to the feeling.

He pushed my body deeper into the mattress as he lowered himself onto me, his hips rocking against me as he pushed himself into me, feeling as though I was being ripped apart from the inside out. The pain was nothing I'd ever felt before. It hit every nerve and every bone in my body. Not even breaking every bone in my body on my first shift had felt this painful, nor did it even come close to the pain of getting beaten to a pulp by the warriors in my Uncle's pack in order to prove my strength.

What broke me to the point of choking on a sob, was the reality that this was not mating in the slightest. It was not what I had been taught and what I had dreamt of. It was not beautiful and wholesome. All I ever heard growing up was how beautiful the experience of mating was. To become one with your other half was the most extraordinarily pleasant feeling you could ever feel. It was a process of not only connecting on an emotional level with someone made for you, but it was a process of becoming and morphing into one with your mate. The process of gaining that thread of connection that would link two souls as one until the end of time.

All I felt was pain on top of pain. Agony like I had never felt before laced with disgust. Disgust at myself for being so weak yet again despite my years of training and yet my body felt weak as if those very years meant nothing at all. I was so engrossed in my self hatred and self blame that I failed to realize what exactly was going on around me. His grunts and groans only intensified with each hour that passed, giving true meaning to his Alpha being it was almost as if he was never satisfied.

"You're mine, and only mine. You've always been mine" he said as he pushed himself into me with each word he uttered. I closed my eyes hoping it would just end already. I just couldn't bare to look at him.

He pulled out of me and let go off me. I let out a shaky breath feeling so exhausted and dirty. I had never wanted to even be in the same pack as him let alone be mated to someone like him. Someone who truly hated me enough to do such a gruesome thing. He turned me around onto my back and pushed back inside of me. I turned my head to the side and closed my eyes, not wanting to see his face, so afraid of what I would see. Those red eyes of his that haunted my dreams till this very day.

"Open your eyes and look at me" he said.

I tried to fight his command and kept them shut, only making him thrust faster and harder. I felt him bend down and felt a searing pain in the side of neck, close to my shoulder as he dug his canines into my neck marking me. Something that usually brought out pleasure like nothing else in the world, now felt like a hot rod was being driven into my neck. I let the tears flow out freely now, caring about the whimpers of pain that passed my lips as the reality of his soul binding itself to my own, dawned upon me when I felt something warm shoot through me.

He withdrew his teeth after pouring his pheromones into me and licked that spot making it heal. I wondered why he even bothered to let it heal when he had put me through so much of pain. I gritted my teeth as he pulled out of me and I began seeing black spots. I closed my eyes to the thought.

I would never love him..never..