Alex's POV

When we got within site of the pack house, true to my word I said him down and let him limp back with me holding him around his waist trying to provide him with comfort and support.

As people came into view he straightened up as people started running to us, asking if he was okay, he just smirked and said it was like a day at the spa.

I knew he was covering up how he felt and what he went through. I knew what he was going through, I had been there my self, I know the pain and the shame that he felt over what happened to him, I had been there myself, and I could feel it through our bond.

He never asked and I never commented on the burning pain from my mark when Charlotte was raping him.

It's been 2 days, and we are currently in our hotel room. The Red Moon pack's Luna ceremony was moved to tomorrow night.

Xavier won't even look at me, much less talk to me. Neither one of us has been able to sleep, mainly because he won't sleep next to me. He sleeps on the couch. I understand he needs time to heal, I just wish he'd let me comfort him.

I'm ashamed to admit it, but right now I'm peeking through his mind to find out what exactly was bothering him. I know I shouldn't have, but I was worried that maybe he didn't want me for a mate anymore because I didn't get there sooner, or maybe he had enjoyed being with her, but what I saw broke my heart.

Slamming the book in my hands shut I stood up.

"I can't take this anymore. Talk to me please." I said getting on my knees in front of him.

He didn't say anything, I saw his fist clinch and his eyes never leaving his laptop screen.

I grabbed his laptop and threw it to the other couch.

"No, your not hiding. I know what happened to you. I know..what was about to happen. It's not your fault. None of it. I'm sorry I didn't get there soon enough. Please, just let me be here for you." I begged.

"How can you look at me and not feel disgusted. I feel disgusted with myself. I couldn't even save myself, how am I suppose to protect you when I couldn't protect me." He said closing his eyes.

"You do protect me. You have protected me when I've needed you too. This isn't the 17th century when women were seen as daft and unable to function without a man telling her what to do. We are suppose to protect each other. You've been strong for me when I've needed you too. This was my turn to be strong for you." I argued

"I don't even see my self as a man right now. How could you still want me." He said as more of a statement than a question.

"Because you are mine. And I will show you everyday that you are. I'll do or be whatever you want or need me to be." I said

I knew he probably wouldn't let me hold him, but I knew he loved taking care of me, so I settled for letting him think he'd be the one holding me.

"Will you hold me?" I asked giving my best puppy dog eyes.

He looked at me for a minute then opened his arms for me to sit on his lap. I crawled up quickly before he could change his mind, causing him to chuckle. I settled in his arms straddling him with my arms around his neck and my face nuzzled in his neck. I started running my fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck causing his chest to purr.

After a few minutes he placed his face in my neck. We sat like that for hours, I never wanted to move. Unfortunately my stomach betrayed me.

"Come on lets get you some food." Xavier chuckled.

"Noo.. I don't want to let go." I fussed.

"You don't have to just hand me the phone and I'll order room service." He compromised.

I reached over and grabbed the hotel phone and handed it to him settling back in my favorite place.

About 20 minutes later there was a knock on the door. I tried to get off of him, but Xavier got up still holding me and opened the door. After the waiter left Xavier brought the food over to the couch and sat back down. I leaned back and he feed himself and me.

After we ate I got off of Xavier's lap. Pulling on his hand to get him to stand up. I could have pulled him up, but I didn't want him to feel powerless.

I walked him to the bedroom. Once inside I stood in front of him and took off my shirt.

He gave me a warily look. "Please, please touch me." I said looking up at him.

He took off his shirt and walked closer to me leaning down to kiss me. We finished taking our clothing off as we continued to kiss and make our way to the bed.

He laid down pulling me on top of him.

"Are you sure?" I asked looking at him.

He nodded his head lifting me up and brought me down on him. I moaned at he slowly entered me.

I started riding him, slowly. I wanted him to feel loved, not rushed.

I leaned down and kissed him gently, keeping my soft rhythm. He reached up and cupped my face.

"I love you." He whispered.

"I love you too." I said leaning back, arching my back making him go deeper inside of me. He groaned grabbing my hips grinding me to him. Before long we both reached our peaks.

It was slow and full of love.

Afterwards we laid side by side, front to front with his head on my chest while I played with his hair.

"I'm sorry for shutting you out." Xavier said breaking the silence.

"It's ok I understand. But I have a confession to make." I said looking down at him. He looked up at me with a fearful expression.

"I..I'm a cuddle slut. Ok. I love cuddling and I love cuddling with you. I haven't had my cuddle fix in 2 days. I felt like I was dying." I said sighing dramatically.

Xavier chuckled. "Well my apologizes, it won't happen again." He said smiling.

"Better not." I said grinning.

"My Cuddle Slut." He said leaning up to kiss me.

The kiss started to heat up. He leaned over me rolling me on my back, he positioned himself at my core and thrusted into me all at once taking my breath away.

"Good girl." He whispered in my ear and I knew he was back.