DYLAN ||

Garrett and Theo ended up leaving Raiden's hospital room only minutes after my mate turned away from me and faced the wall.

I feel like an ultimate asshole right now and it took someone from my pack getting him out of the cells and Roman seeing him like this, to actually snap me out of my bullshit.

Seriously, what kind of man am I if I couldn't protect my mate from my pack, from pain...

From myself..

How do I even go about making this right??

"Try talking to him Dylan." Maddox encouraged, clearly reading my thoughts and I nod mentally.

I swallowed the lump in my throat before taking a few hesitant steps towards Raiden's bed.

"Raiden?" I ask, extremely hopeful that he would answer back. To my surprise, he slowly turned on his bed to face me once again.

"Even when he's upset with you, he respects you enough to talk to you." Maddox was like a kid on Halloween, souped up on sugar right now. The jerk was practically jumping up and down just from the fact that our mate didn't reject us trying to talk to him.

"Are you just going to stand there and talk to Maddox or did you need something Dylan?" Raiden asked, forcing me to shove Maddox back so I could focus on him again.

"You remember my wolfs name?" I asked a little shocked as Raiden nods.

"Of course I do, he's my mate just as much as you are and when I had Onyx, he wouldn't shut up about him." He said as his eyes met the floor. I didn't even have to assume that he truly missed his leopard because the look on his face right now told that story without words.

"I'm really sorry Raiden for everything that you've been through." I felt nothing but genuine regret from my actions as I watched Raiden raise his eyes slowly to meet mine.

"Keep going Dylan.. He hasn't snapped at us yet. Keep apologizing."

"What else do I say? Help me Maddox."

"Tell him that you're sorry for how you've treated him and that mates shouldn't act this way. That you're sorry and you hope he finds it in his heart to forgive you stupid."

I blink to focus back on Raiden and take my stupid wolf's advice. "I'm truly sorry for everything you've been through Raiden, everything that I've allowed to happen to you. This isn't how mates should treat each other and I really hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me."

He sat quietly while he stared into my damn soul. Not one word left those pretty pink lips of his.

"Keep talking. Come on."

"What else am I supposed to say? He's not talking back."

"That might be a good thing for our mate. Maybe he's listening to you and actually taking in what you're saying."

"So what else do I say then?"

"Tell him that you want our bond to flourish Dylan."

"Maddox... I'm not gay. I don't want that."

"Ok, you may not want your mate, but I want mine and you took him away from me! You owe me this Dylan! Now talk to our mate and tell him that you would love if he gave us another chance and you want our bond to flourish now!"

Fuck!

I hate it when he's right...

"Raiden, I would really love if you would give me a chance to make things right between us.... I would umm.." I stutter through my words before I clear my throat. "I would love if our bond could flourish.... Naturally."

This time Raiden actually showed some emotion, be it only that he frowned a little. That was better than when he was just staring at me. I closed my eyes waiting for his response, I was sure he was going to flash on me.

I mean who the hell would want to continue a bond with someone that's treated them the way I have??

"Dylan." I heard his voice, that beautiful velvety smooth voice and I slowly opened my eyes to meet his again.

"Do you really want that or is that what Maddox wants?" He asks as the frown on his face deepens.

"Maddox."

"Just be honest Dylan. Tell him that's what I want and tell me him what you want."

"What the hell do I want?!"

"Uhhh what you were thinking earlier! You want a friendship with him."

I clear my throat once again before looking back at my mate.

"Maddox wants our bond to flourish, but I was asking him to give me some advice on how to actually talk to you.. and he said to be honest about what I want.." I explain and Raiden nods.

"And what is it that you want Dylan?" He asks and I clench my jaw briefly before letting out a heavy sigh.

"Raiden, I'm not gay. I'm not rejecting our bond, but I'm having a hard time being mated to a man... To be completely honest with you, I want a friendship. I feel like I owe you that at least because of my actions these past 3 weeks... A friendship right now would be really great... I'm just not ready for anything else." I explain my feelings as honestly as I could and held my breath waiting for Raiden's opinion.

He stared at me again, no words. Just that deadly, crazy, creepy stare that I noticed Roman would do too. I guess it's just a feline thing and I know I shouldn't be afraid, but I literally feel like I'm the prey that they're stalking when they stare like this.

"I appreciate your honesty Dylan... that was very big of you to admit your wrongs and speak your truth... so I can do that."

My heart started pounding in my chest just then as I sucked in a sharp breath.

I heard his words, I promise I did, but the shock of what just happened overwhelmed me and all of a sudden, I felt like my hearing was drowned out again.

He did it again, damn it.

With his fucking words.

He tucked at my heart again.

He appreciates me.

He said it was big of me to admit my wrongs.

He praised something I did right.

I was good..

"W-What... umm.. w-what d-did you s-say?" I stumble through my words before taking a deep breath trying to calm myself down, when I look at my mate again. Only when I did, my heart fluttered at the sight of a slight smile on his lips.

"I said I can do that... A friendship... I can do that Dylan."

I couldn't help but smile myself, my mate actually agreed to my demands. Even if they were stupid and unfair to him, he agreed to them to make me happy. At least that's what I'm telling myself and I won't have to be worried about our bond being forced on me by him.

He's willing to just be my friend instead of a boyfriend or something I'm totally not ready for with another man.

"Thank you Raiden, I really don't deserve your kindness after everything I've allowed to happen to you."

He frowned again before shaking his head.

"Let's not talk about these past 3 weeks please Dylan. I don't want to think about the things that have happened and if we're going to try being friends moving forward, then bringing up the past issues won't help that."

I quickly nod my head, feeling myself slowly let out the breath that I had been holding as my eyes once again met Raiden's.

His eyes really were beautiful. They definitely remind me of a sunset.

The Moon Goddess knew exactly what she doing when she paired us, that's for sure. Raiden smelled like my favorites spices. His eyes reminded me of my favorite past time, watching the sun set on our world. His calm, patient demeanor was opposite of mine.

The calm to the Alpha's storm.

I couldn't help but chuckle from that stupid metaphor. It seemed to fit so perfectly for our situation.

"Stop calling your bond anything other your bond Dylan.. can you imagine how much you hurt Raiden when you called him a predicament."

My shoulders sag at the memories of how I've behaved the last 3 weeks. I called him a predicament and a prisoner and I allowed so much to happen to him. To my mate and I did nothing about it.

Wow.. great job. You're such a great Alpha Dylan...

Yeah right..

I looked at the door, then back at Raiden, who was watching me silently.

Fuck..

I literally hate myself..

"I understand if you need to leave Dylan. It's ok, I should rest anyways." Raiden said, making me stare into his eyes even further.

This man didn't even know me, yet he could read me better than myself right now.

I wasn't even sure if I wanted to leave.

Was that even the reason that I looked at the door? Goddess..

Taking a deep breath, I shook my head and slowly made my way to the pull out bed.

"If you'll let me, I'd rather stay here until you're discharged. Maybe we can start building that friendship." I offer, waiting for his response.

I didn't have to wait long though as I watched him nod without much hesitation.

I smiled at him then climbed into the bed and grabbed my laptop, looking for a movie to watch until it was time for the nurses to come back in for Raiden's pain meds.

As he got comfortable on his bed, I sunk deeper into mine and I couldn't stop the stupid grin that crept on my face. I tried my best to hide my face behind my laptop, so that Raiden wouldn't notice how dumb I looked right now.

Unfortunately for me, my mate was an observant man and he definitely noticed as he shot his own soft smile back at me.

I have a long ways to go before I'm forgiven, I know that, but at least he's willing to give me a chance to try to gain his trust back.

That's more than I could say about myself. If he did the things to me that I've done to him, I would have rejected me.

Lucky for me, my mate is a better man than I am.

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