"I am so fucking bored." I said out loud to no one but myself.

It is now Wednesday night and I was yet again, home alone. My parents will be home late, and I roamed the house with a blanket around me, and my mouth chewing the veggie wrap that I had made.

Dani and I finished all of our assignments at her place five days ago, and the way I kissed her burned in my head while it replays over and over again.

I groaned and held the blanket closer around me.

I should be happy that I have these feelings like this for her. I should be happy to want her, and I should be damn happy that she wants me like I want her. My thoughts flooded with these complicated things all night, and I'm getting frustrated because I can't help but feel like I'll never be enough.

Why the hell do I feel like I hate myself all the time? I know I have people to talk about it to, and I know that they know but-

But why do I hate the fact that they know?

"Ugh!" I threw the blanket in the middle of the hallway towards the kitchen and stomped my way into my room.

I need a distraction.

Back at Dani's house, she knew something bugged me. Right away she asked what was wrong. Me being me, I tried to evade her question by making an excuse about how we needed to work on our assignments. Dani, being Dani wanted to know what was going on in my head but didn't pester and gave me space.

I would see her in class, and we would work on our assignments individually. It was kind of obvious that I was trying to ignore her, but Dani didn't question it. I was grateful for that. But I was trying to feel pretty bad about it when I stopped replying to her texts, and everyone's texts. They would ask me if I wanted to have lunch with them out of school but I would say no and go hang out in the library studying instead.

Dennis called me out on it, and I just told him that the teachers were giving us a shit ton of assignments and that I was behind. He believed me, and left me alone for a while. But I have to reply to his messages regarding our Secret Santa exchange this Friday. I didn't want to disappoint everyone by blowing them off about that.

I could tell Dani and Natasha didn't buy my bullshit, but to my surprise they haven't drilled me with questions.

Gina, during basketball practice one day asked if I was trying to kill the team by giving intense high cardio plus strength workouts. I straight up told her that I know some of them will be slacking off during this winter break and I wanted hard-level training before so we can easily catch up when we get back.

Some of our teammates agreed with me while the others fell flat on the ground, and out of breath. Dani was bent down, also out of breath with her hands on her knees and staring at me. I handed her a water bottle and told everyone to take a quick water break because we needed to scrimmage before we end the practice. They all groaned but didn't question it.

I knew Dani wanted to talk to me, but I was out of the gym after I quickly changed back into my clothes. It was almost as if I was hiding from her, and I really was.

Now I'm here in my room, looking at the clock reading eleven thirty on it while I zipped up my running jacket over top my long sleeve athletic shirt. I quickly put on thermal pants, and running pants overtop of that. It's been a while since I ran outside in the cold, so I made sure that I won't freeze out there. Finally, I put on my wireless earbuds and put on winter earmuffs on top.

With that, I made sure to lock the house and ran to god knows where. My running shoes felt springy, and comfortable which made me run faster than normal. I was lucky that it wasn't icy tonight, or else I would've fallen on my ass by now.

I cranked up my music and drowned out my surroundings while I ran. I'm glad I went out tonight. It was so nice. Perfect temperature, the moon is up and bright, the houses I've passed had their Christmas decorations up which made the whole neighborhood seemed jolly.

The sheriff car who often does rounds around the neighborhood passed me while I running, and I gave a wave. Everyone in this neighborhood knows me, and I am grateful for that because I feel so much safer running this late.

Then my mind went to the fact that everyone knows who I am. My school knows who I am. My church too. Would they know who I was in a relationship with too? Would they hate me? More importantly, would they accept me?

At this point, I ran even faster. I was nowhere in my neighbourhood now, while I followed a trail that I know goes to an abandoned bridge called The Dubois Bridge. I chuckled. Of course, it would be named that. I forgot that it was there in the first place.

It was a bridge that used to accept shipments from traveling boats by the river in the earlier days. Now under that bridge is all dried up, filled with debris and trash. The bridge though, is covered in graffiti. Some of them were disgusting messages, and a few artistic murals. I remember writing, Maverick was here with a permanent sharpie somewhere on the rails. I wonder if it was still there?

I slowed down, and tried to catch my breath for a second. I checked my phone and apparently, I had run eleven kilometers already and with a text message from Dani saying,

"Can I call you?"

It was sent an hour ago.

With a sigh, I ignored it and looked for my graffiti. I don't think I could talk to Dani right now without the urge to cry, so I think I'll wait it out for now. I was nearing the end of the bridge when I noticed that someone was there spray painting a thick wall. It was a feminine hooded figure, wearing all black, and they too are wearing running shoes. There was a bigger flashlight laying on the ground facing the wall by the busy figure who was now bobbing their head up and down.

I took off my ear muffs and ear buds, and realized that there was loud punk music playing too. It was coming from a speaker, and I tilted my head to the side from curiosity.

"Hello?" I called out, but I wasn't loud enough to get their attention. "Hello!" I tried again, and this time the figure stopped and turned to face me. They didn't say anything. I still couldn't see their face. I was too far.

What was I doing? This place is sketchy. My parents would kill me if they knew I ran here at this hour. A long time ago when my parents were younger, this placed used to be known for drug deals. But that stopped when there was a youth death involved. But still, I shouldn't be here.

"Hi, Maverick." The person said. My ears were ringing from how loud my music was when I was running, but their voice sounded familiar. The person turned their speaker down.

"How do you know me?" I asked now walking towards them even closer.

"You're a celebrity." The person said, and they chuckled. "You're not going to tell on me, are you?"

It was Dani.

The shock looks on my face must've been obvious because Dani burst out laughing.

"You're such an idiot. What the hell are you doing?" I asked in bewilderment when I walked even more closer to stare at the wall that she was spray painting at. "This is a criminal offense!"

Dani's mural was stunning. It was a Christmas tree, no- it was an apple tree. It was decorated like a Christmas tree though, and a man with a thorn crown dressed in white t-shirt and white sweatpants was tying up something around his neck-

"This is religiously inappropriate." I blurted out as soon as I saw what Jesus was doing. "But very artistic."

I looked at Dani and she shrugged her shoulders. I knew she was artsy, and good at editing videos but I didn't know that she can do street art like this.

"I was trying to imitate Banksy's style, and fuse it with mine." She said. Dani pulled her hood down, and adjusted her toque. She nervously scratched the back of her neck as she stares at me. The big flashlight showed that Dani had paint on her chin. I looked at her with amusement and admired her mural again.

"This is fucking awesome, but also very illegal." I blurted out. "And also, fancy meeting you here."

"What are you doing here?" Dani asked.

"I went for a run." I said.

"At this hour? That's really late and dangerous."

"Says the one who is hanging out at one of the sketchiest parts of town." I replied, chuckling. "Also, I couldn't sleep and I was bored." I added still admiring her work.

"Oh."

There was an awkward silence between us. Her music was low in the background, but I hate every second of this awkwardness.

"I didn't know you could do these things." I said.

"I didn't know we were talking again." She said, which made me feel like I was sick to my stomach. Dani sighed. "You're not really supposed to know because uh, being this is illegal and all."

"That's right, I could totally tell on you. I did run pass the sheriff tonight." I joked, now smiling at her.

"I could put the blame on you. Who says I can't cover up a crime?" Dani joked back.

"You couldn't because I can just run out of here. I could outrun you, you know. You're pretty slow." I replied. Dani was closer now than before. Her eyes looked golden from how the flashlight was hitting it, and she looked beautiful.

"Then I guess I would have to kill you." She whispered, still grinning and pressing a finger on my shoulder.

"I can put up a fight." I whispered back, not breaking eye contact.

"You know I'm stronger than you." Dani said, closing the distance between us, my back now hitting the wall beside her mural. I looked up at her, because she was taller and placed my hands on her hips.

"I know. You really are." I said and noticed that my voice trembled. It was as if I was putting my defenses down and gave in by giving Dani a kiss on the lips.

"Mave..." Dani said, pulling back and now looking at me with concern. She wiped something off my cheek and I realized that I was crying.

"I'm going through some stuff." I admitted and smiled at her. "I know I've been ignoring you, but know that I'm handling it."

"You don't seem to be handling it well, now are you?" She asked, and giving me her comforting smile. "I want to let you know that you can always talk to me, right? I can help."

"I don't know, this is more on me." I replied.

"I knew you would say that, and I've noticed that you wanted space. I can give you all the space you want Maverick, but I can't handle that I know you're suffering and I can't do anything about it."

"I don't know." I stupidly said again more to myself than her.

There were loud footsteps and a powerful booming voice saying,

"You're vandalizing this property! Stop where you are!" I knew that voice, and it was the sheriff.

Dani quickly grabbed her backpack and speaker, grabbed my hand and kicked the flashlight.

"I said stop!" He said.

Dani and I ran as fast as we could to lose the sheriff. I was running so fast that I was now pulling Dani behind me to catch up.

"Good thing you trained us on cardio eh?" She joked and laughed a little.

We cut through the nearby park and kept running until we saw the church and quickly sprinted to the playground in the back. We quickly hid in jungle gym where the boulder dome was and sat inside while trying to catch out breaths.

"Oh my god, oh my god, do you think he recognized us?" I said, in between breaths.

"No way, I kicked the flashlight so he couldn't see."

"Holy shit that was too close."

"I know."

"That was fucking fun though." I said, now laughing out loud. "Who am I turning into? I never thought I'd run away from a cop."

"Sorry, that's my fault. I'm a bad influence on you."

"No fucking way!" I protested grinning from ear to ear. "You're far from being a bad influence."

"Shh! What if he caught up to us? Keep quiet for a minute." Dani warned me but laughing softly herself.

We stared at each other while trying to calm down, and I can't help but think about that kiss I gave at her house the other day. It's still burning in my head, replaying over and over.

"You're going to kiss me, again aren't you?" Dani asked quietly, now grinning her lop sided grin.

"Dani I..." I took a deep breath. "I think I'm in love with you."