There was not enough time in the world.

I paused, turning around in my room and trying to figure out what it was that made me feel as if there was something that I was looking over. My purse was lying near my bed, and my keys were on my dresser. Those were the things I always took with me to work.

"What could I possibly be missing..."

I stilled mid-perusal of my room when a knock sounded on my door. A knowing smile formed on my lips. A giddy feeling rushed through me, and I snuck a glance at myself in the hallway mirror. There was no missing the smile on my face, or the light that hadn't always been before. I shook my head, a grin tugging at my lips.

I hadn't even realized I had been so indifferent, not living in a constant state of sadness, but definitely not happy. Until he had come along.

Maybe it was because we were still in the honeymoon phase of dating, only a week having passed. But the truth was that Elijah had made me feel the exact same way before we had even talked about what we were.

I left my bedroom, walking down the hall. Just like every time he was at the door, the sight before me didn't disappoint.

"Hey."

"Hey, sweetheart."

Elijah stepped in, wrapping his arms around my waist, and burying his head into my shoulder. I hugged him back with a smile. I breathed in, just enjoying the feel of him around me.

"Hey," I whispered, wrapping my arm around his neck, and enjoying his proximity. Mint and pine invaded my sense in the best of ways, and I felt myself being lifted off the ground slightly. Elijah straightened, rocking back and forth before getting me back down. "What's got you in such a good mood?"

Elijah lifted his head, warm but bright eyes smiling down on me. I couldn't help the flutter of my chest, as his eyes dropped and he took a step back. His hands lingered on each side of my waist, as his gaze did an obvious sweep of me from head to toe.

"Nothing in particular." He tugged on the hem of my shirt. "You look nice today."

I caught the glint in his eyes, knowing I had been caught. It was his.

I smiled guiltily, leaning forward, and pressing my mouth to his.

"You're not getting it back," I mumbled against his lips. His mouth curved up in answer, and he gripped me tighter, placing a kiss on the corner of my mouth.

"I am running a little late," I muttered when he pulled back.

"That's okay, we have a little bit of time to kill."

"Okay. I should be just a bit longer."

"Is there anything I can help with?"

I shook my head, burrowing my hands in my hair. "I think that I am okay...but I feel like I am forgetting something." A frown tugged my lips downward. I cleared my throat with a shrug when his eyes softened. "I guess I should be used to that by now."

He shook his head, sending me a gentle smile. "I can't imagine what it must feel like."

Sometimes I didn't know how to explain the feeling either. The feeling was almost hollow. As if I ws empty in places I shouldn't have been.

"It's okay. I guess no one can remember everything," I laughed hoping to ease the mood.

Elijah nodded in agreement. "True but I can help some maybe." He clapped his hands together and looked around, stepping out of my embrace. He snapped his fingers when his eyes landed on my computer, which was sitting on the table. "Did you remember to turn in that scholarship application?"

I nodded, having done so the night before. "Yeah, that isn't it." I turned to make my way to my room, checking to see that he was following me. "Maybe it is nothing though."

"Maybe."

His gaze raked over my desk, lingering on the journal that rested there. He walked over, his fingers barely brushing over it over before he pulled away. Elijah glanced at me, sitting on the edge of my bed with a soft smile. I eyed the journal and then him.

It didn't take me long to put two and two together.

"You really are amazing you know that?"

He chuckled. "And what makes you think so?"

I laughed when I walked past him and he swatted at my backside. I grabbed my journal, waving it with a relieved smile. "I forgot to read this."

His eyes lit up. "That is me, a forever helpful one."

I laughed again. That he was.

Looking at the time, I bit my lip. I really was short on time and was already late despite Elijah having reassured me that we were good on time. I liked to get to work early, and Elijah had a Saturday soccer practice to get to.

I glanced at Elijah, and he lifted an eyebrow, a question lingering on his handsome features.

Unless...

"When do you have to be to practice?"

"Not for another hour and a half. Why?"

I still had an hour to kill myself, if I was willing to only be fifteen minutes early to work. I took a breath, my nerves knocking at the back door. This would definitely be something I had never done before, but I think that I was willing to take that step.

"Do you want to read it to me while I get ready? You know just to make sure I didn't forget anything important?"

The question came out breathy as if I had been holding my breath and was just now reaching the point where I couldn't anymore. I felt as if I had just run a marathon. But as soon as I asked I knew that it was a step I wanted to make. I was ready for this.

Elijah's eyebrows shot up in surprise, the colors in them even more vibrant. He stood slowly, taking a step towards me an unusually gentle look in his eyes. He was always careful with me, but this time the expression was different.

"Love..." He ran a hand through his hair, his shoulders rising and falling heavily as he took a deep breath. Then came the smile, that practically lit up his whole face. "If you want me to then yes."

I smiled, just his confirmation giving him the reassurance I needed. This was good.

"I want you to."

Elijah took a step forward, and I had little time to react before his arms wrapped around my waist and he was hugging me.

"You sure?"

I just nodded against his shoulder, all of my previous doubt gone. When he released me, I stretched the journal towards him and he took it hesitantly.

****

"You also wrote in here that you need to pick up Skylar from her brother's house today."

I needed to pick up Skylar? Why hadn't she reminded me that?

Oh wait...maybe that was what she had been trying to tell me when I had been in the shower and couldn't hear her through the door.

I glanced up, peeking my head around the corner of the bathroom, and glanced at Elijah. He was now perched on my bed, one hand supporting his head as the other held my journal up to his face.

"Does it say a time?"

He nodded, his eyes scanning the page. "Four."

Sounded like a plan.

I laughed when Elijah looked at me and the book fell from his hands. "Sorry," he muttered with a frown, carefully picking the book back up and assessing it as if looking for bent pages.

"It's okay. It won't break."

"I know. It is just something special to you and I want to take care of it," he answered with a frown. But it fell away when he seemed satisfied with the state of my journal.

"Okay, where was I? Remember to get coffee..."

I leaned my head against the door frame, watching as his eyes paused on a sentence that was unknown to me.

"Why did you stop?"

Elijah, glanced at me from underneath his lashes, before looking back down at my journal. When he looked back up at me, the smile playing on his mouth made my heart flutter. It was one that told me he knew something that I didn't.

I placed my brush on the counter, before walking out of the bathroom, before admiring the expression, and him in general, some more. Unlike his usual method of wearing his hair out, he had covered it with a hat. Tufts of dark curled ends snuck out from underneath it, making him look even more appealing.

"I thought that you forgot all about our coffee date," he finally murmured softly.

I took in the glint in his eyes. It was was enough to make me happy for whatever he was talking about without even knowing what it was. I shook my head still clueless as to what he was talking about.

"We were supposed to get coffee awhile back, and I just never brought it up because I thought you hadn't wanted to." He held up the journal as I neared. "When I dropped it, it must have opened to another page."

He handed me the book, flipping to the previous date as the realization settled. "Either I skipped over this part or I forgot to read it." I paused scanning the page. There was no mention of Elijah except for a single sentence telling me that I was supposed to schedule coffee with the...

I stared at the words, my mortification growing as I looked at what I had written.

"This is so embarrassing."

"It's okay, sweetheart. I could very well be an Armani model."

I set the book on my mattress, bringing my hands to my face, as I stared at the amused grin on Elijah's face kept growing.

"This is going to go straight to your head isn't it?"

He shrugged with a chuckle. "No, but it does mean a lot that you did think to write it down. Even if you didn't get the chance to re-read it."

I nodded, throwing myself back on my mattress. When I glanced at Elijah he was watching me with that softness that always lingered whenever he was content. Peaceful. Happy.

I had no idea how I had managed not to write his name down in the first place. It would have made life so much easier.

"Hey." I pushed up onto my elbows with a grin as a thought popped up into my head. "How about we go on that coffee date today after I get off work?"

The smile in his eyes said it all.

****

Text me when you get here.

I smiled eagerly to see Elijah as I thought about yesterday. Like we had planned we had gone to coffee afterward. Maybe I was biased but it had been the best coffee date I had ever had.

I shut my phone off after sending the text, looking into the sea of eager faces that watched me expectantly. I was currently at the library, just having finished reading to eager little kids for the past five hours. Every year, my mom and I go to the annual Christmas reading at the local library.

It was a charity event, where people volunteered, much like my mom and I were, to read books to little kids. The ending goal was to raise enough money to buy gifts for the kids at the Shriners Hospital for Children.

"Okay guys, that is the last book I have scheduled to read for you today." I smiled, as a collective groan emitted from them. Who knew kids would love to read this much? "Hey, it's okay guys. Remember that we will read a new book, each day for the rest of the week. So ask your parents to stop by again." I watched as the tiny heads bobbed up and down, and one by one, they waddled off, finding their parents. All except one.

"Ms. Rowan, what did you ask Santa for Christmas," an adorable little girl in a long-sleeved polka dot dress asked me. She looked to be around five years old and I cooed inwardly as she smiled at me, a gap where her front two teeth should have been.

"Hmm," I said, placing my finger on my chin, as I feigned a contemplative look. "This year I asked Santa for snow on Christmas."

"But we always have snow on Christmas. We live in Oregon silly." She giggled, and I laughed at how cute she was.

"Oh, that's right," I said, tapping her lightly on the nose. "But are you sure we don't always have snow because that's what I ask Santa for?" I watched as her eyes widened.

"Maybe your right!" A childish smile played on her lips. "Do you want to know what I asked Santa for this year?" She asked in a whisper.

"I would love to hear what you asked for."

"Okay," Her eyes were wide, and she cupped her tiny hands around my ear, motioning for me to lean down. "I asked Santa to make Holden my dad."

When she pulled back and looked at me, purity and innocence shone in her eyes. Even though I had no idea who she was talking about I could see how much she wanted it to happen. Before I could say anything a soft voice sounded from behind us.

"Layla honey, are you ready to go?"

I glanced up, looking at the girl who walked up. She didn't look to be any older than I was, but man she was stunning. Her gorgeous olive complexion and luscious honey-toned hair fell just below her waist, as her long legs solidified the fact that she could have been a model. I marveled at her striking pair of green eyes when she reached us. She looked to be around the same age that I was, yet somehow also looked way more mature.

Layla's eyes widened as she looked back at me. "Remember, it's a secret," she said, just as her mom walked over to us, and Layla latched on to her legs, nearly knocking her over. I sent her a warm smile as I stood.

She laughed as she untangled Layla's arms from her legs, picking the child up before she looked at me. There was a curious glint in her eyes, and she tilted her head to the side,

"Hey, haven't we met before?"

I froze, unease washing over me. I opened my mouth, trying to come up with a quick excuse to cover up the fact that we had probably met, and I just didn't remember. I sighed internally in relief when her face lit up and she spoke again.

"Oh, wait." She snapped her fingers as if she was trying to jog her memory. "You are Rowan, right? We met at Hayden's place after a soccer game once. I don't know if I introduced myself, but I am Rene."

I breathed out quickly, in relief.

"Oh, yeah right," I said, pretending like I knew exactly what she was talking about. "I remember, I didn't stick around too long, unfortunately." I chuckled nervously as I lied through my teeth.

It wasn't that I was embarrassed to explain my situation to other people, it was just that it was a lot to explain. Plus, it was super uncomfortable whenever I encountered someone who I had met before, but couldn't remember doing so. It made me feel out of place. Like no matter how hard I tried to live a normal life, it would never be achievable.

"Mommy, can we get hot chocolate before we go home?" Gratitude surged through me when Layla asked the question, diverting Rene's attention from me.

"Yeah. I think that we can baby." Layla hugged her, and she returned it. A smile tugged on the corners of my lips as I watched the pair. "You're dating Elijah Scott, right?" Rene said looking at me again. She boosted Layla up higher on her hips, in what I was assuming was a more comfortable position.

I nodded slowly. It was still weird to think that Elijah and I were dating. I mean, I knew that I had liked him for a while, but the concept still seemed a little foreign. I had barely dated throughout my years and college, so it was a distinct change for me.

"Yea, I am." Saying it out loud sent a rush of warmth through me.

She nodded. "I thought so. My boyfriend plays on the soccer team with him. Maybe you know him... Holden Winters?"

I blinked at her before I nodded again. I probably looked like a lunatic, but if I did, she didn't show it and just continued on talking.

"Yeah, he says that coach is considering keeping Elijah as first-string goalie this upcoming semester. He is always saying how Elijah is one of the best teammates they ever had."

Hearing this made my heart burst with Joy. I knew how much Soccer meant to Elijah, and how long it had taken him to pick up a ball again after the accident he was in. Knowing that he had overcome so much and that others saw it too, made me feel so happy for him.

"There are my girls," A deep voice said before I could speak. Rene and I both looked to the side, a smile now on both her and Layla's faces.

"Holden," the little girl squealed happily, practically jumping out of Rene's arms, as she ran to him. He extended his arms, catching her, and she burst out in giggles.

"Shh," he whispered, bringing his fingers to his lips. "This is a library baby. We have to be quiet."

Layla giggled, nodding her head as she placed her head on his shoulder, patting his chest with her small hand lovingly.

"I missed you."

The look of adoration on her face as she looked up at him, caused my heart to melt.

My eyes flitted to the figure next to him, and a smile broke across my face. Speak of the devil.

"Hey," I whispered when Elijah walked over to me, wrapping an arm around my waist and pulling me into a hug. My head tilted up involuntarily, and he pressed a light kiss on my lips.

"Hey yourself," he said quietly pulling back. The fresh scent of his cologne coated my senses and I leaned further into his embrace, my eyes still captured in his. I definitely wished that we were alone right now. When he smiled I returned it but paused momentarily searching his eyes.

He seemed off, but it could have been that he was just tired.

"You okay?"

He nodded but didn't give anything more.

Something told me however that there was more to it.

I only looked away when Rene spoke, saving me from practically mauling him in the middle of the library. "We were just talking about you," she said to Holden, as he placed a kiss on her forehead. "Where did you go?"

There was a slight pink hue that formed on his cheeks when the question left her mouth. He shrugged his shoulders and smiled at her. "After we dropped Layla off at the book reading, and you met up with Elise to study, I went with Carter to run a few errands."

Elijah tensed, and I knew exactly where his thoughts had gone. I understood how he was feeling. Even after years had passed, and life still seemed to go on you could never really forget. There were always constant reminders of the person you had lost. I wrapped my arm around his waist, rubbing his side and he pulled me closer to him.

Rene nodded, not asking Holden any more questions, and I marveled at her trust. Most girls would have drowned their boyfriends with questions after receiving such a vague answer like that, but she didn't seem bothered by it.

"Well," Rene said, turning back to me." I should probably get Layla home, but it was nice talking to you again, Rowan."

"Likewise," I said with a smile. I watched as Layla kicked her legs for Holden to release her, and she ran to me, reaching her arms up. I scooped her up, and she brought another hand into my ear. "Can you ask Santa to make Holden marry mommy for me too?" she asked, a little too loudly. "Since you asked Santa for snow, and he gives it to you every year, maybe if you ask him, my wish will come true."

I was pretty sure Rene had heard because her cheeks turned crimson and she glanced at Holden, who was obliviously staring down at her as if she was the reason the earth rotated on its axis every day. I didn't think that I would need to ask Santa for anything. I wondered if one day Elijah would look at me like that.

"Of course."

Happiness filled Layla's eyes, and she hugged me, her little hands wrapping around my neck. I was caught off guard by the force exerted by such a little body and probably would have fallen if it weren't for the fact that Elijah was behind me. I sent him a thankful look, and he sent me a curious one, also having overheard what Layla had asked me. I sent him a look letting him know I would explain later.

"Well, come on, Layla," Rene said, pulling the little girl gently from my arms. Holden moved, picking Layla up and grabbing Rene's hand. Layla sent me a small wave, and Holden and Rene said goodbye before they turned and exited the library.