《A Song of Remembrance ( Redamancy Book 1: Completed)》Chapter 4:

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Elijah's POV:

Studies showed that seventy-two percent of marriages remained intact after the death of a child. It was a blessing the percentage was so high. With all the pain and suffering people endured in one lifetime, it seemed only fair that some still got a happy ending.

Even if it wasn't everybody.

"Elijah, are you still there?"

I blinked, shifting my phone in my hands with an apologetic wince, as I stared at the blank tv screen in front of me.

"Yeah, I'm here. Sorry. I should be able to come down to the house for winter break if that is okay with you."

"Of course it's okay. I am up here all by myself. Speaking to you only on the phone isn't enough. I miss having you at home."

My heart dropped a little by the statement.

I knew why she had decided to get out of Oregon. There were reminders of Carter everywhere here. But it would have been nice to be able to see her more often.

"I've missed you too."

Studies showed that seventy-two percent of marriages stayed intact after the death of a child.

My parent's marriage was part of the other twenty-eight percent.

After Carter's death, my mom was the only genuine family I had left. My father was still alive. He just wasn't someone I considered a dad anymore.

"So how have you been settling in this year? I know that classes get more rigorous during the third year for pre-law majors."

"I have been good. My classes are a little more tedious, but I am managing."

I didn't have any other way to describe the classes I was taking, without sounding ungrateful for the chance at an education. It wasn't that I didn't like the university I was going to, it was that my future had been forced upon me by a man who was barely in my life.

"I am glad to hear that. What about girls? Are you going to give me a daughter-in-law soon?"

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"Mom," I chuckled, "I think that it's way too soon for that."

"You never know. Sometimes the right people just pop up out of nowhere."

My train of thought shifted, as I thought back on the grey-eyed beauty that had been sweeping across my mind all day. I hadn't forgotten the way she had practically run out of the lecture as if the room had been on fire, without so much as a goodbye.

The girl was a bottle of mystery. One that I wanted to solve.

"Maybe."

There was a spurt of silence. "You met someone didn't you."

I let out a whistle.

"No."

"So that would mean yes."

I chuckled. "I don't even know her."

"So it is a yes."

The excitement in my mom's voice, gave me a mental picture of her expression, both hands holding the phone to her ear and her eyes wide. She was the hopeful type.

"Don't you have work to get to?"

Her musical laugh drifted over the phone and she sighed. "Fine, don't tell me, but I want to be the first one to know if something changes." Her voice was teasing when she asked, "Don't you have soccer practice to get to?"

I laughed again, glancing at the time.

"Yeah, I do have to go soon. And I will."

"You better, and I want to meet her when it happens. But anyway, don't forget to call me from time to time. I know you are busy, but I miss you so much."

"I will. I've been busy lately, but I will call you more often," I said, feeling guilty for not having called her sooner.

"It is alright, honey. I love you."

"I love you too."

The line went dead as she hung up, and I pulled the phone away from my ear. It was times like these when I wished that she still lived here in Oregon. But moving had been a chance of freedom for her, and I understood. Everywhere I turned, the ghosts of the past haunted me too.

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Carter's favorite restaurant.

The highway that led to the racing track.

The intersection where it all happened.

I couldn't wait to escape this place.

I stood up from the old lumpy couch, walking into my room in search of my soccer gear. After finding it, I pulled on my jersey and the other pieces of my uniform. Grabbing my duffel bag from the floor, I left the room.

I pulled out my phone again when I heard the notification signal go off. Irritation flared in me as I looked to see that I had gotten an email. There was only one person who still sent emails to my inbox.

I clicked on the message.

Elijah,

You aren't answering any of my calls. I would love the time to talk. If you see this please contact me.

My fingers hovered over the screen for a second, before I turned off my phone, shoving it into my pocket before shutting the apartment door behind me. If he wanted to talk he had plenty of chances to do that years ago when I needed him most. When I needed his reassurance to ease my guilt. Guilt that had only been nurtured by his sudden disappearance.

I had no idea why it was now that he wanted to talk to me. Heck, the last time we had talked had been about how culinary school would get me nowhere. From his point of view, law school was the only way to go.

That had been three years ago.

The cold air hit me, as I jogged down the stairwell steps, causing me to regret not having worn a thicker jacket. When I made it over to my car in record time I ran a hand over my face, standing beside it for a bit before I hopped in.

Even though I tried to squash the anger that was rising it was nearly impossible.

Even halfway across the country, my dad found a way to rake his hand through my life.

I inserted the keys into the engine, just as my phone buzzed again. I picked it up glancing at the text from my mom.

Your dad texted me. Maybe you should talk to him...

I frowned.

I knew most people were supposed to love their dads but sometimes I wished I hated mine. He had always been someone who was obsessively consumed with work, but the accident had switched a flip in him. He had poured himself, even more into his work, distancing himself from mom and me as we had grieved.

Deep down I'd always known he was trying to get away from me, more so than he was from my mom.

Something I didn't blame him for either.

I was a stark reminder of what he'd lost. Of the son, he had always admired. The one I was sure he preferred in my place. My mom had always said that my dad didn't blame me for the accident. But after it happened, he could never look me in the eyes again.

I scrolled down reading the rest of her message, my chest tightening.

Also, I started looking through a couple of your brother's things. I think that it's time to clear out some of his old stuff. I wanted to tell you in case you wanted anything.

I closed my eyes, my head falling back against my seat. We had been putting this off for years now, and even though I knew it was necessary it wasn't something was looking forward to.

If we finally got rid of all Carter's stuff, then that would mean I had to finally accept his death. I wasn't sure if I was ready for that.

Or if I would ever be.

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