Eli's hand wanders from my waist down to my thigh. His fingers grip my soft flesh and then he starts turning onto his back, pulling me with him by my thigh and neck so I am now sitting atop him, on his waist. His hands find my hips where they settle in a strong hold. My own hands are braced on his chest and I look down on him through my hair that has fallen all over my face from being thrown around like that.

"So, tell me. How am I the one being tantalizing?" Eli questions me, one eyebrow raised expectantly. He slowly slides me down further on his body until my hips are aligned with his. His hard-on presses into my core and I gasp, followed by a moan. One of my hands leaves his chest to cover my mouth in shock.

I would love to answer his stupid question because I could write an essay about it but I am having a hard time focusing on what's happening, let alone trying to think straight right now. I barely register his right leg moving; bending at the knee so his thigh is now right at my back.

"No answer? Hmm yeah, that's what I thought," he smugly says in a gruff voice.

Coming down from my initial shock, I decide to answer his question, after all, not wanting to let him win this game. I open my mouth but before I can even speak one word, Eli thrusts his hips upward with a tilt and hits a very sensitive spot between my legs. Another gasp and moan spill from my open mouth and my arm goes behind me where my hand grasps onto his large, muscular thigh. I feel all of my skin getting hotter and hotter and I don't even want to know how flushed my face is right now.

"You like this?" Eli taunts, tilting his hips up again, making me lean against his thigh and throwing my head back in pleasure.

All I can do is nod, so I do.

"You want me to stop?" His voice is rough, almost guttural. He tilts his hips again.

I shake my head and release a needy whimper. Fuck this feels good.

"Use your words, darling."

"No, don't stop, please." I hate and love the begging undertone in my voice at the same time but this just feels so good that I am happy to beg if I have to.

Adhering to my pleas, he continues the movement of his hips, alternating between thrusting, tilting, and rolling, and my mind is lost in a fog of delicious pleasure. My body surges forward, my hands on his chest again, my hips trying to catch up and move in sync with his. My core is flooded with heat and I can feel my arousal dampening my panties. I don't even care about the sounds that I am making, I just don't want this warm feeling that's rapidly spreading through my body to go away.

One of Eli's hands leaves my hip and crawls under the hem of my shirt, his long fingers spreading over my stomach. My skin tingling where he touches me. He slowly but firmly uses his hand to push me back against his propped-up thigh and effectively pins me there. My hands, forced to leave his chest due to the newly created distance, are desperately trying to grasp onto something, convinced that the sensations will otherwise overwhelm me. They find his forearm of the arm that holds me in place and the panicky feelings evaporate as soon as I hold onto him again.

Eli increases the pressure with the heel of his palm on the area of my pubic bone and I can't take it anymore. I grind my hips against his straining erection and a groan leaves his parted lips. I almost feel like crying; the emotions and sensations start to build up to a point where I can't hold it any longer.

"Eli... fuck, I- I can't.." I pant, desperate for release.

"Shhh, I know. Don't fight it, I got you."

I am so close.

"Look at me," Eli demands and the moment my eyes lock onto his I cum with a long, whimpered moan. My eyes don't stray from his for the entirety of my orgasm, not leaving them while he makes me ride it out. His hand still pinning me to his thigh, slowly loosens its hold and I begin to fall forward into his open arms.

"I got you," he repeats, his voice strained and a bit out of breath as well.

"We really suck at this 'taking it slow' thing," I say with a tired grin. I am wrapped up in Eli's arms, our legs tangled and our skin slightly sweaty. My head settled on his chest.

"We do," Eli agrees. "Are you okay?"

"I am great," I tell him, a little confused by his question. "Are you okay?" I parrot.

He laughs a little at that and kisses my forehead. "I am more than okay. Although, I probably have to take a cold shower soon."

I blush at his innuendo. I wish I could make him feel like he just made me feel but I don't know how. Maybe I can just go for it. But what if I suck? He probably had his fair share of blowjobs in his life and I definitely won't be able to compete with all those other, experienced women. Or his wife. His ex-wife, Romy. I could do it with my hand! That can't be too hard, right? Just up and down and up and down aaaaaand... I have no idea what I am talking about. Shit. I was being selfish, not caring about what he felt during all of this. God, I am so greedy and now I can't pay him back. Ew, that sounds kinda weird.

"Romy?"

Should I ask him to teach me? No, that sounds wrong, too. Like I am his sex student. Okay, this is getting out of hand. I should just tell him that I have to pee and then I beeline out of here. Escape plan, yeah, that sounds good.

"Okay Romy, ow. That hurts, could you please let go?" Eli's hand lands on top of mine which has subconsciously been tangling into his chest hair and is pulling it tight. I immediately let go with a gasp and jump up, sitting on my knees.

"Shit! I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to do that." I scramble to apologize.

"I figured," he replies with a laugh and grabs my wrist to pull me back down into his arms. "What did you ramble on about in your head? I can't believe I'm saying this but I wish for once you would've rambled out loud."

"It's nothing." My head hides in the crook of his neck, my face flushing a deep red. God, why do I have to be so easy to read all the time?

"Come on, you can tell me."

"No, I can't."

"Does it have to do with me? Or us?"

"Yes."

"Then you can tell me. What's going on in that beautiful head of yours?" I can hear the smile in his voice but it's mixed with concern. "Did I do something you didn't like? Did I hurt you?"

"Oh, oh no! Not at all. I- I really liked it actually. It was a bit overwhelming but in a good way."

"Overwhelming because it was too far too fast?" he inquires.

"Um, more like because this was the first time someone other than me gave me an orgasm," I sheepishly admit.

Eli's body stiffens for a split second before he gently pushes me back by my shoulders to look at my face.

"You're kidding, right?" he quietly asks. His brows furrowed in confusion.

"No," I shake my head.

"You're being serious?" He looks shocked.

"Yep," I whisper, gauging his reaction closely.

He now props himself up on his elbow and leans closer to me. His hand reaching out to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Why didn't you tell me that?"

"Does it matter?" I ask him.

"Of course it fucking does. I would've done things very differently and definitely not this damn fast. I would've paced myself, paced us. Are you sure you're okay?" He sounds angry with himself. I don't like it.

"Yes, I'm okay. I'm great actually. Like I already told you. I really enjoyed what we did. Please don't treat me like a porcelain doll, Eli." I plead. "Maybe it's good I didn't tell you," I add as an afterthought, biting the skin on my thumb and looking away.

"Hey Romy, listen." He catches my chin with his thumb and forefinger and turns my head so I have no choice but to look at him again. "I don't regret what we did. I would be fucking stupid if I did. But I was really close to taking it a lot further and I would've never even considered that if I know you have never been with a man before."

"Why not? Maybe I wanted you to fuck me." The words come out before I could catch them and my eyes widen in shock.

"That reaction alone just told me that you are not there yet. And that is perfectly fine. I don't mind waiting. But it's only fair for me to know what I am dealing with, too. I don't want to constantly overwhelm you or make you feel insecure or pressured."

"You don't make me feel that way." I defend but he gives me a look that tells me he thinks I'm full of shit.

"You really don't! Most of the time at least. But I never felt pressured by you, I swear."

"Okay, that's good to know. But you already told me that you were overwhelmed and I have seen and felt your insecurity on multiple occasions."

"I know. I'm sorry for not telling you."

"Don't be, it's fine. That's what you were spiraling about earlier?"

"No, not really. Well, kinda I guess. I was getting nervous because I wanted to make you feel the way you made me feel but I don't know how to." I cover my face with my hands and groan. "God, this is so embarrassing."

Eli chuckles before prying my hands from my face. "It's really not. It's cute, actually."

"Shut up."

He full-on laughs now.

"I feel honored that you want to make me feel good, but you already do. This isn't a tit-for-tat thing, Romy. I had my fun, too, don't you worry about that."

"Okay," I nod and exhale a relieved breath.

"Seeing you all flushed and bothered, grinding on my dick like that, you have no idea how much fun that was for me. I think that was the sexiest thing I've seen in a long while." Eli whispers in my ear before kissing his way along my jawline.

"Jesus, you really have no filter. And I highly doubt that."

"I don't. We really should take it slow though. From now on," he muses and stops his kisses.

"I'm with you on that but let's see how long that will last," I laugh and peck his mouth. I'm about to kiss him again but another question pops into my head.

"Have you told Bennett yet?"

He nods.

"Really? When?"

"Last night."

So little details.

"Okay, and what did he say?"

"Not much. To be careful and not to hurt you or toy with you. Which is obviously not my intent so I assured him he has nothing to worry about," Eli elaborates a little further. I feel like he is leaving out a good chunk of their conversation but maybe it's not my business. Even though I would love to know.

"I'm glad he's okay with it."

"Me too."

"So, where is that breakfast you were speaking of?"

I grin at him and point at his bedside table.

Tess and I are bathing in the sun at the shore of the lake, my nose in a book, her ears plugged with headphones, invested in a true-crime podcast she is listening to. This has been our occupation for the last few days. Today is Wednesday and Tess and I plan on going to the garage later with some food for the guys. Eli and Bennett have been over there non-stop, I barely got to see him. Of course, there were many glances and some stolen kisses here and there and endless teasing from mainly Tess but sometimes Bennett would join her. I really miss spending more time with Eli.

Speaking of, I turn to my best friend and pull one of her headphones out of her ear.

"What do you want?" she grumbles.

"Do you miss Simon?"

"Why do you ask that?"

"I am just curious. Maybe you can invite him to stay over soon."

"Why are you going on about Simon all of the sudden?" Tess asks, seeming a little annoyed but genuinely interested.

"I don't know. I have watched you texting Josh rather unenthusiastically and I have not forgotten about your drunk confessions about your feelings for Simon." I pin her with a pointed look.

"I told you we agreed to not be exclusive, so I don't think it's a good idea for me to get attached."

"Sooo, do you want to meet Josh then?"

She laughs sarcastically. "God no!"

"Why not?" I ask with a laugh of my own.

"I don't know, he's not my type really. And he's kinda boring, too. I'm not feeling it."

"Alright alright, no boys for you then, I guess."

"The more there is for you." She winks at me.

"No thank you, I am sticking with the one for now." A smile creeps onto my face, thinking about Eli.