《SIN-BIN》17. Not My Jam
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"Mason, get your stupid ass back here!" Layla yells, while I continue strolling aimlessly down the street. I don't want to talk to her, and I definitely don't want her to make a scene in the middle of nowhere. Ugh, I really need to take my time and just learn my ways around this town and campus. It's becoming exhausting. "Ava!"
I take a deep breath and halt in my tracks, not turning around and just waiting for Layla and Grace to line up with me. My mood is in such swings, so I honestly feel lost. Why the hell did I go along with his dare? It's not like he was holding me at gunpoint, or anything. I could have said no and left the freaking house, but I didn't. I went and kissed Drake, right in front of everyone... revealing to my best friend that I slept with her brother. I'm the dumbest idiot on this earth.
Layla walks around and stops in front of me. Her eyes are narrowed, and she vigorously chews on her inner cheek while staring at me. I feel Grace's presence by my side, but I don't look at her. I hold my best friend's gaze. "When did it happen? And how the fuck does Thompson know, and I don't?!"
"He heard us." I shrug my shoulders, lowering my eyes to my feet. "At the party."
"What? Can you be a bit more specific?"
"After you snapped at me at the party, I bumped into him, and he tried to calm me down. Drake saw us and thought he made me cry. We talked things through, and then your brother took me to the bathroom... Apparently, Thompson stayed and heard us." My voice is just above whisper, and incredibly monotonous.
Layla blinks and opens her mouth, but no sounds follow. Then, she clears her throat. "So, you... just let my brother fuck you in the bathroom?"
"Yeah." I nod my head, hugging myself tightly. "Then we went to his room, and I stayed with Drake till the next morning."
"It wasn't the first time, was it?" Grace asks and I don't even have strength in me to argue. Or become angry. I glance at her and nod my head in confirmation.
"Ava, how many times exactly Drake and you had sex?" Layla's voice trembles.
"Three."
"THREE?!" And she's back to yelling. Amazing. "When?!"
"First time happened last year, when he came home after his team lost a game. We were drunk and got carried away. Next one was at the first party, when Thompson kicked me out and Drake ran after me to make sure I was fine..."
"He sure did..." My best friend hisses, her eyes emitting fire and I almost feel like she is burning holes in me. I keep quiet, not knowing what to expect. I have been thinking about it happening a thousand times, and it never ends well in my imagination. Is she going to stop being my friend? "You know that you're a stupid cow?"
"I do..." I blabber, tears obvious in my voice. "I should have told you but... It doesn't mean a thing. To either of us... and I was sure you weren't going to like it-"
"Do you even know how many times I fantasized about you and Drake together? About you becoming my sister-in-law?" I blink in total stupefaction. It's exactly what her brother told me after we had sex for the first time. That she would be planning our wedding and asking us how many children we're going to have. What the actual fuck?! "You just went and ruined all that!"
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"Ruined? I didn't ruin anything, Layla. Your brother and I are friends. Friends with benefits when we want, but no more than that. I don't even like him in that way!" I blurt out. "He's a good guy, and you're perfectly aware of what I do to guys like him."
"Should have thought about it before sleeping with him." She snarls, throwing hands in the air. "He likes you!"
"No." I shake my head. "It's in your head. You want us to like each other, and that's why-"
"I actually think Layla is right." Grace interrupts me and I explode. I'm still processing the fact that this fucking idiot chose her among all other girls he could have slept with, so her stepping in just pushes my limits to their edge.
"You both have no idea what you're talking about! It's just sex!" I shout, and angry tears start streaming down my face. "It's amazing and I'm not sure I have ever been fucked that good before, but that's all there is to it. I swear."
Layla looks around, biting her bottom lip nervously. I wait, ready to storm away from them any minute if they are going to insist on Drake and me being romantically involved. Suddenly, my best friend sighs and takes a step closer, wrapping me in her arms. "You're a dumb fucking bitch, but I fucking love you..."
"I love you too..." I wind my hands around her waist and hide my face in her hair.
"You could have said no to Thompson." She whispers in my ear, and for some extremely weird reason I giggle. "Ava, I'm serious."
"He was hinting he knew about me sleeping with Drake the moment he saw me strolling down the stairs from your brother's room after the first party. I honestly wanted him to leave me alone, that's the only reason why I did it." I hug her tight.
"He's an ass. Don't pay attention to him anymore." Layla runs her hands up and down my back, reassuring me and giving me warmth I crave.
"I hate him, and I probably have never felt the way I feel about him with anyone."
"Not even Skylar Hall from high school?" She asks jokingly, and I laugh hysterically, but she manages to make me smile again. "Did Thompson top your hate for our Queen B?"
"Almost." I lean away, roaming my eyes over my best friend's face. A gentle smile plays on her lips, and her gaze is tender. "You aren't angry with me? For real?"
"I'm not angry with you. For real." She sneaks a glance at Grace and peers at me. "But please stop. Whatever is going on between Drake and you, it needs to stop. You might not notice it, because it's not like that for you, but I know my brother. He likes you, and if it keeps happening, he might fall in love... Do you want to be the reason for Drake's broken heart?"
"No." I mutter, suddenly feeling uneasy. Heartbroken Drake is the worst version of him I have ever seen. And me being the reason? I'll need to drop out of college and go study abroad, for him to move on. Not on my agenda for sure. "I already thought we shouldn't do it anymore after last time, so..."
I'm not lying. His decision to have sex with me in a house full of people rubbed me in the wrong way. It was something that couples do, sneak around to fuck. I wasn't his girlfriend. I wasn't even the girl he spent most of his night with. Plus, Thompson...
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"Thank you, Ava." Layla kisses my cheek, and steps back. "You're lucky I already dealt with Grace and her being sneaky... I took the news like a champ. Don't you think so?"
"You did." Grace laughs loudly, draping her hands over my shoulder and Layla's. "She threw a fit when she found out about Colton and me, so now? This was easy peasy."
"You slept with the guy I liked." My best friend murmurs, but her tone of voice leaves no room for suspicion. She's not angry with her roommate, and completely moved on from Thompson.
"How did she find out? I can't even imagine you telling her yourself?" I nudge Grace, and she breaks into laughter, her hands dropping off our sides.
"I didn't tell her anything."
"I saw him kissing her, right after he snapped at me and told me to get lost. So, when they left the party together, I had no doubt." Layla and I lock eyes for a second, and I notice a hint of disappointment. It reminds me a lot about her high school drama, but at the same time it's easier. Thompson was just a crush, the guy she couldn't have because of her brother, while in high school - she was in love. "She didn't even try to fool me, admitting everything outright."
"It didn't make any sense, you know. I wanted for things to be normal between us... even if I was afraid at first you would eat me alive. So of course, I told you the truth."
"I'm glad you talked things through." I force myself to smile, and instantly yawn. "Let's go back to the dorm? I want to go to bed."
Layla nods her head. "Our dorm is 15 minutes by walk from here."
"Okay." I shrug my shoulders yet again.
"What are you going to do about Thompson?" Grace muses with uncertainty. I don't even look at her, thinking she's asking my best friend. "Ava?"
I pinch my eyebrows together, looking at her sideways. "Why are you asking me that?"
Her gaze sweeps over my face, and a lopsided grin forms on her lips. "Just thought maybe you're going to plot some revenge." She just made that up. It's definitely not why she asked in the first place.
"No. I just hope not to see him in the foreseeable future." I exclaim harshly. "Until his ass graduates and leaves the college."
"Didn't know we live in a fantasy." Layla sneers, bursting out with laughter. "Where are my fucking dragons when I need them?"
"They are still eggs, Daenerys. You forgot to burn your husband, bitch." I mumble between fits of laughter.
"Can you stay serious at least for 10 minutes? Both of you?" Grace asks, trying to fight her giggles. Unsuccessfully.
"Nah." I smack her ass, making her yelp and scoot away from me. "Where is the fun in that? Right, Benson?"
"Shut up, bitch." Layla's fist connects with my forearm. "Jason Momoa entered the chat and asked not to disturb us."
"What?" Grace stops in her tracks, her eyes wide and pupils dilated. "Are you high?"
"Yeah, high from love." I wrap my arm around Grace's waist, as we walk down the street, accompanied by Layla's humming. "She has had a major crush on Jason Momoa for years, and me calling her Daenerys triggered her sick fantasies about him."
"Sick fantasies?" My best friend shrieks. "Do I need to remind you about Jacob Elordi? What did you do once you saw him in Euphoria?"
"Brought myself to orgasm?" I chortle, while all that Grace manages to say sounds close to 'ew'. "The guy is bae, and if you don't agree, we're going to have a problem."
"I leave him all for you. Don't worry." Grace shakes her head, disbelief evident on her face. "But come on, you two are such weirdos."
"That's why we are best friends." Layla and I say in unison, smiling gently at one another.
"Hard not to notice." My best friend's roommate smiles back at us.
We continue laughing, bickering, and even singing on our way to the dorm. I feel finally at ease when I step into the building, and it's all because of my friends. I pushed every little memory or thought I had circulating in my head to the farthest corner and closed it here. Thompson belongs exactly to this darkness. For good.
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Plopping myself down on the seat on Layla's right side, I wiggle trying to nestle more comfortably. I love going to the movies but at the same time I don't. Watching something lying on my bed suits me better, especially if it means I can cuddle with someone. Though at the lack of cuddling partner and Jordan being an annoying bitch agreeing to go to the movies sounded promising. Until it wasn't. I'm not a fan of Marvel at all. The only two I liked were Spider Man and Dr Strange, so it's very unlikely Eternals will be my favorite.
Taking a spoonful of my ice-cream, I shove it to my mouth and close my eyes. It's delicious and the way it melts on my tongue brings all my receptors to life. At least something to cheer me up and hopefully change my mood. I don't think I'll have it in me to watch the movie for more than two hours if I don't enjoy it at all. Maybe I will, but I know myself too well, so I am already sure I won't. A very strange end to my incredibly weird week.
"Let me try it." Layla points her spoon at me, but I shake my head. "You're being stingy, Mason."
"I'm not. You've been too evasive when I was asking about the movie, because you knew I wouldn't come if I heard it's Marvel."
"You don't like Marvel?" Grace leans forward in her seat on Layla's left and stares at me. I shake my head no and her green eyes round a little. "Why?"
"Not my jam." I retort, taking another spoon of my ice cream. "It's like it's good for one time but no more than that."
"Usually, she leaves before it ends and just waits for me in the hall." Layla comments, pointing her spoon at me again. "Are you going to do that again?"
I laugh wholeheartedly, shaking my head. "We will see. The movie hasn't even started, so who knows?"
"Drake texted me," my best friend says slowly, her eyes glued to my face. "He and a few guys are here too."
"Okay." I smile sheepishly. Just my luck, I guess.
This week was full of Clay Rodgers. He was everywhere I went, and it honestly started to gnaw at me. I like him, don't get me wrong and he's funny, but it's not how he wants me to like him. It makes me feel bad about myself from time to time because he's really nice. Unlike Baker. Drake told him to fuck off, threatening to beat the living shit out of him if he tried something on me. Did it help? Not really. He just changed tactics and plays that he is a nice guy who is hurt by my rejection. The last time he pissed me off so much that I gave him the middle finger, right in the middle of the cafeteria. Clay had tears in his eyes from laughter when he walked up to me a few minutes later, telling me it was the most epic thing he had ever seen.
Drake and I... Well, we haven't had the talk Layla expected me to have with her brother. We have continued acting as if nothing changed, or more like nothing ever happened. Just like we did after our first time. We are friends. We care about each other. End of the story. I only hope it will stay like that when we are hanging out together at the next party. I'll need to set boundaries, even if selfishly I don't really want to.
"Girls!" Speak of the devil. I glance over my shoulder, seeing guys from the team heading down the stairs to their seats. Drake strolls in our direction with Clay in tow, both smile from ear to ear and involuntarily I smile back. "Didn't expect you to pick this movie."
"I love Marvel." Layla grunts, narrowing her eyes on her brother. "Mason is the one who's not a fan."
"I'm aware." Drake's gaze flickers to me and his sister grimaces. "Ava loves you too much, and it's the only reason why she's here."
"Or it's because no one told me what we were going to watch." I plop another spoon of ice cream into my mouth.
"What do you have here?" Clay reaches out and grabs my ice cream from my fingers. "M&Ms. Why am I not surprised?"
"Give it back." I pout and he hands it back to me with a mischievous smile. "Thanks."
"Do you need a ride back to the dorm?" Drake's gaze rakes over the three of us, and we shake our heads no. "Cool, then enjoy the movie."
They turn around and go up to their seats. I quickly scan the room, and tension leaves my body. Thompson isn't here, and my mood drastically changes. I haven't seen him all week. Not because I was avoiding him, but because we never were at the same place at the same time. I can honestly say I can work with that. It's way easier to forget about this asshole when he's not constantly in my face.
"Who is your favorite Avenger?" I shift slightly to Layla and her roommate.
"Captain America," Grace breathes, a dreamy grin on her face.
"Then it's not surprising that Kaleb is your type." I arch my eyebrow at her, and she only shrugs her shoulders, still smiling. Her classmate asked her on a date, then on another one. They aren't officially dating, but I wouldn't be shocked if they started to. They look good together. "Layla?"
"As if you don't know." She sulks, folding her arms across her chest. "Are you even my best friend?"
"Of course, I am." I laugh, my head bobs back and I even close my eyes. God, if someone told me that absence of one jerk can improve my day so much, I would have agreed to come here just for that. Opening my eyes, I'm ready to tell her I certainly remember her crush on Thor, but a breath stuck in my throat. He is standing on the stairs and staring at me. Argh! Why the fuck did he need to be here?! Averting my gaze, I veer a little to give him my back and focus my attention on Layla. "You were obsessed with Thor."
"And still am." Her body shakes from laughter, while I basically force myself to smile. This stupid fucker keeps his gaze on me, and my neck reddens.
"Is there someone you like, Ava?" Grace asks curiously.
"Sebastian Stan," I answer curtly. "Winter Soldier."
"I'm aware." She chuckles, shaking her head as the lights slowly turn off. "You're all for bad guys, girl."
"I am." I whisper, my body is tense and rigid. I'm uncomfortable and angry. Jeez, it will be even harder to find joy in this movie with that moron here... and with his eyes on me.
45 minutes later I'm ready to stomp out of the movies. Eternals aren't that bad, but I barely hear anything, let alone remember all the characters and what's happening on the screen. Instead of watching the movie, that stupid idiot keeps his eyes peeled to me and I can't even think straight. What the hell is his problem with me? He has made me look like a fool more times than I can remember. What else?!
"I'm going to go to the bathroom." I whisper to Layla before standing up and taking my purse from the seat.
"Will you be back?" She looks at me, scrutinizing me under her gaze. I lift one shoulder instead of an answer. "If not, just wait for us in the hall. Okay?"
"Sure." I nod my head and move slowly, apologizing for any inconvenience. The place isn't packed with people, so it's pretty easy. I purposefully choose the opposite row to avoid this motherfucker. Anything actually, just to avoid him.
The door closes and I blow the air out of my lungs. Might as well really use the bathroom, and then I will figure out what to do. Though just to be honest at least with myself, the possibility of me going back to the movie hall is highly unlikely. The movie and that fucker's attention messed up my mood, and I would prefer to read something on my phone to get back on track.
Pushing myself from the door, I head in the direction of the bathroom. A guy lingers behind the counter, looking up from his book and smiling at me. I bet he's bored to death all alone, and he's reading - a point in his favor. Maybe it won't be that bad if I can hang out with him while waiting for the movie to end. I smirk to myself, walking further and opening the door of the bathroom. I head to the farthest stall, close it, and suddenly hear the door of the room open. The water starts running, and I shake my head from my stupidity. Why the hell did I become so jumpy? Ugh.
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