"She wore a troubled past

Like wings-

She had been through hell,

and though no one could see her demons,

they could see the face that conquered them."

Have you had ever felt like being in a box, trapped inside it, not a single passage being inside for you to see the sunlight, the hope, the warmness?

They say being trapped in a box is the worst thing that can happen to you.

Faye Lockwood was struggling, struggling to save herself, get herself out of the barriers, of the box.

Her smiles were fading day by day, the black hole inside her consuming the happiness.

Its been a week since the sourness blanded with her physique, taking over her.

Its been a month since she had returned from Brenda's.

Its been a week since her parents thought that its better if they call off their marriage or whatever they had for the past twenty three years.

Its been a week since she had started embracing the darkness, the bitter truth.

Sighing, she called off the alarm clock before it could ring ten minutes from then.

She didn't get any sleep, hell, she hardly closed her eyes these days.

Stumbling, she walked up to the bathroom and took a handful of water by the sink, splashing it on her face.

Her eyes did not dare to look at the mirror that stood in front of her, showing her reflection, laying out all her flaws, exposing her.

Composing herself, she walked out of the washroom and picket up a fresh pair of clothes, running her hands through her tangled hair. She was sure it looked like a nest.

"Stupid, stupid hair." She shrieked as she felt a knot. Groaning, she ran a comb through the locks, finally being able to get out of the tangling mess.

It was still too early by the time she got ready for school. Biting her lower lip, she picked up her history textbook and ran through the contents.

Faye had her first midterm exam today and she had hardly opened the textbook. No matter how many times she had gone through the entire book, Faye had always been the nerd, someone who could never risk her marks.

Circumstances did not help either, her mind was going through too many things.

Rubbing her eyes furiously from the back of her hand, Faye found herself walking out of the room.

And for the first time, she felt the absence. It was not like he was always there for her, roaming in the hallways, spending time with her, no, he was always away.

Its just, she felt a permanent change, a permanent absence that she knew will be there for an eternity, nagging her.

Her father's room will be soon turned into a store room, his office will be gone, erasing his existence.

Was she happy about it?

Surely, she never was fond of the way he acted towards her, surely, she was never going to forgive him for what he did, but leaving, without a goodbye, without even talking to her, made her too angry.

It made her feel like she was not worth it.

"Mam, starving yourself will not make it any better. Please get up, you need to go to work, the meeting will be held tomorrow, you know this contract is important for you." A frown took over Faye's features as she heard the whispers coming from her mother's room.

Closing her book, she walked up to the direction of her mother's room with a curious mind.

"Martha, I do not want to go. Please, give me some time. God, I cannot believe he fucking left us with a girl of his daughter's age. Why is he such a dick? This is so wrong." Faye peeked through the little crack of the door, just to see fat tears rolling from the woman's eyes she never knew had the ability to feel anything.

Veronica was crying, sobbing recklessly, screaming profanities and looking like a broken doll.

And for the first time, Faye felt something else towards her instead of anger and hatred. It was strange, really, but she felt sorry for her, sorry for Veronica who was left by her husband.

At that moment, she did not look at her as a mother who was never there for her, but as a woman who was betrayed by her husband, who was rejected, who was broken.

"Um, you, alright there?" She did not know what came up to her but she walked inside the room, a small smile planted on her lips. A smile that said she was sorry, a smile that said she also hated the man who left them forever.

"Ah, I will leave you two alone." Nodding, Martha walked out of the room, leaving both of them in an awkward state, where none of them knew what to do.

It went for minutes that felt like hours. None of them had the courage to speak, to say what they had in their throat. The tension between them was increasing by every second and suddenly Faye felt like suffocating.

"Why do not you sit down?" There was uncertainty in Veronica's voice and she, herself winced at her words. In her mind, she had already lost Faye, in her mind, she knew that her daughter hated her, hated her for everything that she did.

Faye hesitated at first but slowly, sat on the couch that was far away in the corner.

Maybe it was because they were not close, maybe it was because they held a grudge against each other, a certain misunderstanding, anger because Faye did not dare to sit next to her.

After some minutes, she cleared her throat, finally deciding that she had enough, "So, how are you?"

"How are you?" Veronica asked her instead, a small smile accompanying her features.

"As usual. It did not make a vast difference, I mean, it is not like you both are always there. Sure, it feels weird, since his things are gone but, I will be fine." Faye said, fidgeting with her fingers.

"Oh."

"What about you?"

"It gets better."

"Um, mother?"

"Yah?"

"Will it be wrong if I accept that I will miss him? I mean, I know he do not deserve the love after everything that he did, but I will miss him."

"Its okay to miss him Faye, we will miss him but time heals everything, does not it?"

"Did you love him?"

"Arthur?"

"Um, yah?"

A sigh escaped from Veronica's lips and she closed her eyes, "For a long time, I really did. I was crazy for him. Like, a little fangirl. I thought, he loved me too, you know. Before our wedding, when he would take me out, he always used to be such a gentleman, bringing flowers and chocolates for me. Stupid, stupid me, I used to think it was all real."

"Was not your marriage a planned agreement? Was not it for all business purposes?"

"Me, Arthur, we used to be in the same college, an elite academy whose soul purpose was to get the most successful companies together, connecting one with another. Even many parties used to send their heirs to grow connections with other groups, to expand their business, you know. It was like, everyone was just thinking about being successful, does not matter if they have to spend their life with a complete stranger. Talking about me? I was too stubborn and wanted to have something that was not build with business purposes. Let's just say, I believed in love, true love. I met Arthur in one of those boring parties that the academy held every month, something that I was always supposed to attend because of my father. But, like I said, I used to be stubborn, used to scare every man that dared to come near me. Arthur, he was just different."

"Different?"

"Yah. He did not talk about his family business like every other guy did. It felt like, he was interested in me, not in the property that I inherited. He was just different, my definition of perfect."

"How did things change then?"

"He cheated on me. The night before our wedding, he slept with my sister."

Faye was left speechless. She did not expect that, she had never expected that. Never expected that her mother had gone through so much. That all those things had formed the new Veronica that she was today.

"You know what's funny?" And Veronica scoffed, "I caught them making out in his room, I knew, I knew the very same day that he was cheating on me."

"You, what?"

"I knew and I still married that man."

"What, why?" Faye did not understand, she really did not.

"For the company, for my parents who believed in me, for the people that relay upon me. For them, I married a horrible person. I would not lie, I knew this would happen, that he would leave us."

"You did a stupid thing. You ruined your whole life." Faye said, shaking her head.

"I regret my choices, Faye. And I am sorry, sorry for everything that did to you, to our Sumner, for not being there for you, for being so cruel, so so cruel, for being selfish." And she started crying once again, pulling the covers upon herself so that Faye could not see her tears.

Faye watched, she watched as she teared up, hiding her embarrassment, her defeated self.

"Mom, for once, do not hide yourself, please, I, I am here for you." And soon, Faye walked up to her, sitting by the edge of the queen sized bed.

"And I was never there for you." Came a muffled voice.

"I am really angry at you for everything that you did. I would not lie, I hated you for everything, somewhere, I still do. It will be hard but, I, I want to give you a chance mamma, I think, you, you deserve it."

"I am so sorry Faye, so sorry." And she pulled up the covers before enveloping Faye into a motherly hug, the one that Faye craved for.

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@tomboy_16