Chapter 40:

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" I push him away fiercely. His back hits the doorstep. He sluggishly stands and smirks like a fool, clearly reeking of alcohol.

"Aisha? Is everything alright?"

Omar calls from the kitchen.

He can't see him, I can't let him see Yousuf. It sounds wrong but things would definitely get ugly.

"Y-yeah." I stutter.

"Who's there?"

"Aliyah, give me a sec." Shutting the door, I punch Yousuf who stumbles back. "What the heck is wrong with you? Are you crazy!" I yell but not loud enough for Omar to hear.

His smirk transforms into a frown. "I'm... I'm crazy for ya." He narrows his eyes and points his index finger to me. He suddenly bursts into laughter. "You love me. Oops! I'm wrong."

I fold my hands across my chest avoiding his look. "You have to go."

"Are you shitting me? Is this because of him?"

'Is it?' I ask myself. Once upon a time, I was in love with Yousuf, I was ready to marry him. Now, I'm not sure if I want to. A week with Omar changed everything, it was also driving me crazy. I didn't just crave for his kisses, I craved him. I wanted his presence, his touches. Everything about him makes me feel safe. It sounds cheesy but everything about him intoxicates me in a sweet, scary way.

Oh My God! How stupid was I! I'm in love with Omar.

My eyes meet Yousuf's once again.

"Fuck! It's him. You're in love with him. He broke your heart remember? He toyed with you. He hurt you several times yet you want him. Look at me! I had never hurt you." He steps closer and clutches my hand tightly.

"Please let me go." I winced in pain, he held me very tight that it hurt.

"Tell me the truth!"

"Please, you're hurting me. I don't know how to love you like this, you're drunk. Let me go please."

As if realising how much pain he's inflicting on me, he lets me go and regains himself. "You know, he got everything he wanted. He had everything except you. Just you." He stares at me, eyes watery. "I guess I was wrong."

"I like you Yousuf, I honestly like you. You're funny, cool, caring. I was ready to marry you." I let out a little chuckle. "But I lo-"

I'm not given a chance to finish as his lips captures mine again.

"What the hell!" I abruptly push him and look behind me, eyes wide as Omar glares at us. He slams the door shut as he goes back in.

"Leave!" I scream at Yousuf.

"Forget him, we can-"

I cut him off my using all my strength to push him away. "Leave!" I manage to yell as tears run down my cheeks before rushing back in.

I run upstairs to meet Omar who is sitting at the edge of the bed.

"I can explain, it isn't what you think it's." I step closer to him.

"Get out. Go to him, go to your fucking lover, I'm sure he's waiting for you." He says coldly, his eyes locked on the floor.

"It's not what you think. I don't love him." I sit next to him.

He stands and shifts away from me. "Why the fuck did you lie that it was Aliyah?"

Unsure of what to say, I play with my fingers.

"You lied, I trusted you. But you lied to me."

"I'm sorry Omar but I just...just-"

"Just took me for a fool right?"

"No, I just didn't want to cause a fight. But I swear to God I don't love him. Do you seriously think I would cheat on you? Do you think so poorly of me to not even trust me a little?"

He laughs sarcastically. "You think I'm dumb, you told him you like him and he kissed you."

"I didn't kiss him back because I love you. It's you I love Omar." I approach him, my hand travelling to his cheek.

He suddenly grabs it. "Don't fucking say that. I'm not stupid you know? You love him and what am I to you? Just someone to help you regain your memory. I'm disappointed in you."

He pushes me away making me knock the floor hard. He lowers his head to meet mine. "You disgust me."

With that he walks to the door. "Go to him, I know that's what you want. Go before I do something I regret."

The door shuts. My ribs hurt. My heart breaks. AGAIN. What hurts the most is he doesn't trust me and it freaking burns.

The burning pain in my ribs couldn't be compared to the aching pain in my heart.

Hell that's an understatement!

Hot tears find their way down my face. I didn't stop it, I couldn't. It hurts awfully and nothing stopped it.

"You disgust me." Remembering these words made my heart clench. I wouldn't be surprised if it beats faster than it should. I can't tell for how long I stayed there in tears but something was sure, Omar didn't come to check up on me, he hated me and I couldn't find a reason for him not to. After all, I did lie but I love him. I really do.

I feel like ripping his head off, it's hard to stop thinking about it. About her telling him she likes him, about them kissing. It tortured me and at this rate, I would definitely die.

Is God punishing me for hurting her?

That's the reason I can currently come up with. Brushing my hand through my hair, I groan in pain. The pain is way too much for me to bear. The person who said men don't cry certainly lied. I'm fucking hurting and tears weren't going to even lessen it, yet, they didn't stop pouring out.

I love her but she cheated on me, on us. As much as I wanted to, I couldn't hate her. I just want her gone. Seeing her hurts more and it will definitely be the death of me.

Did she mean what she said about loving me? No! Of course not. A little part of me wished I had listen to her explaination, a little part of me wished she loved me. I guess life's unfair. Karma is a bitch alright, getting me back for the wrongs I did in the past.

"How fucking great!" Out of all times, it decided to hit me now, when we were finally getting along. After our beautiful spession yesterday. Perfect timing!

Turning around in confusion, I search for a pen and paper. I need her out, I need to think this through, I need to get my shit together. Deep down, I know I need her but I'm not going to tell her that, not after what she did.

Getting a pen and paper, I write and drop it on the table before driving out.

I manage to walk downstairs, my ribs throbbing in pain. I fall on the couch, assessing the reddish handprints Yousuf left on my wrist.

"Subuhanallah!" I breathe out roughly. My eyes shift to the right just in time to catch the white paper on the table. I reach for it with shaking hands. Opening it, I swallow the lump in my throat.

Leave before I get back or things could get pretty ugly.

Packing my stuffs, I call Aliyah. In twenty minutes, a taxi pulls up at the front gate and I get in.

"What happened dear?" She asks, her hands caressing mine.

"It's over. He hates me." I simply say trying my best to keep the tears in. She doesn't ask anymore questions but buries my head in her chest as I breathe in her sweet chocolate fruity smell.

Aliyah's home was pretty cosy, maroon and silver ran across the house, basically everything was either maroon, silver, white or black. Beautiful if you ask me, she was never the one for light colours like pink and yellow. I would have stayed and appreciated it more if I wasn't heartbroken and my ribs didn't hurt like hell.

I lay with my back flat on the bed, massaging the area that deeply hurts. Raising my head up, I find Aliyah typing on her phone.

"Dammit he's not picking!" She curses and looks at me with a frown.

"Mind if I crash in for some time before I get my place."

"Of course not, but you have to do the dishes. Cos I know you, you eat like a pig." She folds her arms.

I let out a little laugh. "Now that's not true."

"Baby it's. You hungry?"

"Are you trying to make me do the dishes?" I raise a brow up in demand.

Placing her hand on her chin, she pretends to be deep in thoughts. "Oh yes, is it working?"

"Definitely... I'm starving."

She leaves and later returns with PP juice, jollof couscous and egg sauce.

"Hmm... yummy." I start digging out when she places it next to me.

"Calm down caveman, the food isn't going anywhere."

"This tastes so good." I moan as I take a spoon of the jollof couscous. "Laiba brought it for you?"

"Yeah, she's working in some fashion company in Africa, can't remember the name though. Although Fatima came here for some business stuffs. Laiba said she preferred working there."

Laiba and Fatima are Aliyah's younger twin sisters. They both had smooth chocolate skin with amazing brownish green eyes. While Fatima was very quiet and gentle, Laibal was fearless; always taking risks and being free.

The pain in my ribs suddenly hits me hard, making me groan and clutch my sides in pain. "What's wrong?" Aliyah freaks out and comes to my side, raising my sweater up. Her eyes widen in surprise as she stares at the large reddish bruise now swollen where I had hit the floor.

"Laa 'ilaaha 'illallaah. How did this happen? Let's go to the hospital, fast!"

"It's okay, I'm really exhausted. I want to sleep. Don't worry it would fade soon." I say as I lay back.

"He did this to you right?" She asks.

My head falls in response.

"I'll be back, lay down and get some sleep." I simply nod as she leaves the room hurriedly.

I ignore the pain and try my best to sleep as she said. It's hard though, love is.

The next few weeks flew quickly. My beloved best friend complained of me literally doing nothing which was a lie. I did watch TV, that's something right?

My day consisted of waking up, eating, being lazy and sick, praying and crying myself to sleep. It was hard to smile and harder to think about anything apart from his hurtful words.

Sometimes I can't help but think if life is set out on making me suffer. My life's a mess, a big mess I have no intention of cleaning. Worse, my memory had stopped downloading the moment he left. Although, I remember a lot of things, basically 90%. I can't help but feel that there's something missing, something important.

I have to remember what Yousuf was trying to say. How did I lose my memory and what does my accident have to do with Omar. I stayed stuck staring at the text that was sent a week ago from Yousuf saying that Omar was behind my memory lost. It's true that Omar tried to escape the questions but I couldn't believe that he was responsible for it. The Omar I know isn't that kind of person.

"I can't find my mugs, have any idea where they're?" Aliyah questioned from the the kitchen.

"Nope." I replied while looking at the six black mugs on the table. Even my hand knows the colour of mugs to pick in accordance with my mood.

Great!

"You have to clean up when you use something. I'm going to let this slide just because you're upset okay?" She appears clearing the mugs into a big dark green bowl.

"What happened before the accident?" She tenses up but regains balance as she smiled. "You want more hot choco?"

Rolling my eyes, l drop the mug in my hand into the bowl. "There's something you're not telling me."

"Because there's nothing to say." She ends and leaves. It's a lie, a big fat lie! I could tell if Aliyah's lying, I could read her like an open book and right now, she lied. I can't understand why they're all avoiding this question. Something is wrong and there's only one person that can tell me the truth.

"You need to find something to do!" She shouts from wherever she's.

"Yes mum!" I roll my eyes.

After her consistent nagging, I went back to work. Fortunately for me, I resigned from being his PA but unfortunately I did see him. I didn't want to see his face anymore, but a little part of me wanted. I'm mad at him and myself but more at myself for lying.

Stupid me!

If only I had told him the truth, I wouldn't be burying my head in work all in hopes that he doesn't see me. It's obvious that I'm guilty and upset that he didn't give me a chance to explain myself.

"So when are you going to quit acting like one of the Charlie's Angels and go teach that slut how to keep her panties on. Go claim your man!" Laura says taking a sip of coke. Stressed, I take the can from her and take a big gulp. Straining my eyes, Jenny is dressed in a short gown with deep low cut, showing her cleavage. She stood at his door, knocking for the umpteenth time. For some unknown reason, he didn't want to see her but the persistent bitch couldn't take no for an answer. I had the urge to slap her. Scratch that, to fit her into the coke can, throw it into a bin and burn it. Surprisingly, Omar's handling it good by letting her stay there like a kid waiting to see Santa on Christmas Eve.

Taking another gulp of the coke, I look back at the design. "I don't care." I lie. I care a lot.

"It's three, let's go for tea. There's a place not far. Sorry to say but you look awful." Her eyes roamed my body. She isn't wrong, I really do look awful. Very pale, dark circles underneath my eyes. I easily got tired and dizzy. I felt very sick not to talk of my ribs that hurt endlessly.

"Yeah sure, I need that." I stand and pack my stuffs. I pick my bag when I turn around, my eyes meeting his dark brown eyes. For a second, one could really tell how pale he looks. It's like he's been skipping sleep and food cos he looks a bit skinny. His eyes roam me in somewhat different- disgust. It made my already broken heart break more if that's possible. As quickly as he looks at me, he looks away as he claims Jenny waist. His lips twitches to a smirk, his eyes piercing into mine as he locks their lips.

She has been there for almost an hour, he didn't pay attention to her at all, but when he saw me, he kissed her. I can't come up with a better reason for such act, it's to make me jealous. What sort of creature would do that?

PAIN!

ANGER!

BETRAYAL!

These three emotions were blocking every sort of emotion I was capable of feeling. I didn't realise I was in tears until Laura tugs me away, hugging me deeply. I don't turn to see him again as we rapidly leave.

"You want me to take you home?" She asks sympathetically.

"No, let's have tea." I manage to give her a sad smile as I wiped the tears. She takes my hand in hers before strolling down to the cafe.

"What's with you and tea?" I say as Laura took her sixth cup of tea."You're not even English."

"But my boyfriend is." She wiggles her eyebrows and take a sip of her hot tea.

"Wait I thought you said Daniel's Canadian."

She scratches her head in thought. "Oh we broke up. I'm dating this guy named Scott I met at the movies last month."

My mouth hung in surprise. "Why did you break up with Daniel, he's cute and nice."

"He was cheating on me. Anyway, I wasn't really committed too you know." She rolls her eyes. "Your scone is getting cold."

I take a bite and unconsciously moan as I take in the sweet taste.

"Is it just me or are you getting fat?"

"It's definitely just you." I smile. Honestly, I did notice it. My clothes were kind of looking funny on me.

"Are you free this Saturday night?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Mind coming with me for a double date?"

"I'll be there, where exactly?" I ask absentmindedly.

"Here, I'll pick you up at 6."

"Sure." I say staring at the the black car of Omar speeding off.

I take a taxi to Aliyah's place. Pulling off my brown boots, I walk to the shower and strip off. I stand in front of the mirror, staring at my body. I really am getting fat and my boobs feel very heavy. My nipples are dark and swollen. Well, I'm expecting my period this week. Opening the period tracker app, I find out that I'm two days late. I put on a pad just incase it decides to embarrass me.

Walking out, I'm dressed in a black Abaya and turquoise headscarf and flats.

"You back?" I find Aliyah leaning against the kitchen door.

"Yup and tired."

I drag her to the stool and help her take off her headscarf, letting lose her curly hair. I microwave the lasagna I made yesterday and push it her way. "Thanks." She says tiredly.

"You're welcome." I take out my frozen yogurt and dive in my a spoon before bringing it to my mouth. Immediately I start to savour the taste, I run to the toilet to spit it out. It tastes disgusting.

"Taste this." I hand her the spoon and yogurt. She takes a full spoon of it and smiles. "It tastes so good. Where did you get this from?"

"Um... what?" She asks again looking at me weirdly as I look at her the same way.

"It tastes horribly!"

"It doesn't." She says and takes another spoon to be certain.

I huff and slump on the stool next to her. The perks of the menstrual cycle, but it has never been this worst. Most times, I lose appetite in the meals I love but never has yogurt tasted horrible.

I bring my hand to my mouth as a flow of nausea sweeps me, making me sprint half way across the house again to vomit. This period is going to be one heck of a period!

I brush my mouth and leave the house. My lips purse into a frown as I see him and sit across him.

"Nice to see you again. I suppose you got my text and you're here to talk about it." His lips curls into a sly smile.

"Just spit it Yousuf, I'm not feeling good. What do you want?"

"I think that's my cue, you did call me after all." He's right, I called him, I just want to know what really happened.

"Your fries getting cold." His gaze shifts to the food in front of me.

I pray my belly won't growl in embarrassment and remind me that I haven't eaten a decent food this afternoon. "I'm not hungry thank you."

He shrugs settling deeper into his chair. "Let me tell you a story. Once upon a time, red riding hood was on her way to her grandma's to deliver bread. Deeper into the forest she skipped and sang. Unknown to her, the big bad wolf heard her beautiful voice and fell in love with it. As he sighted her, he disguised himself as a young man and approached her nicely. Impressed by the handsome man's attitude, she tagged along with him. On their way, she blindly trusted him and told him everything about her. Slowly, she started deviating from the path to grandma's. The wolf was hungry and the bread in her basket made his stomach growl. In pity, she gave him half of the bread. But her fingers mistakenly brushed his tongue. She was obscure to the fact that she made the wolf crave to have a bite of her delicious looking hand."

"I don't have time for your stupid story, just tell me what's really going on."