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I wanted to apologize but I was reluctant to. To me, I felt like I didn't do anything wrong. I felt how I felt and all I did was express that. But he didn't deserve the way I lashed out at him. It was wrong by him. "I'm sorry," I said quietly, looking away from him and looking down at his tie again, the annoying urge to fix it coming over me again.

"Why are you sorry?" he asked. I could feel his eyes on me from above.

"I shouldn't have lashed out at you the way I did. You didn't do anything wrong for me to react that way," I mumbled. "It was my fault, I just—"

"Panicked. So you said," he cut me off. I thought for a moment that he was angrier than he was letting on and he wouldn't let it go so easily. "But it's not your fault, Emilia."

I looked up, my eyes meeting his.

"You know what the problem is? We're trying to pretend like nothing happened between us. Like we're still best friends. And you're right, we're not. We're acting like we are but when reality hits and we realize we're just pretending, it hurts even more. What do you want to do?"

I sighed, "It's not about what I want, Adam."

"Yes, it is. It is, Emilia. Because if I told you what I wanted, I know you won't be able to do it for me. But I can do whatever you ask me to. So just tell me."

"Let me try at least. What do you want, huh?" I lifted my brows at him. He should at least give me a chance to try doing things his way.

"I want to talk everything out. Right now. I want to leave this party right now so we can talk. Just you and me, alone. Can you do that for me? And remember, we may not even come to a solution, we could just end up hating each other more. And that would ruin this trip. You still want to try?" he huffed, both of us stopping on the dance floor, now standing frozen.

When I couldn't bring myself to answer him, he eased his hands off me. "Just let me fix this, Emilia. Because it feels like I'm the only one trying. If you don't want to, that's fine, but at least let me do it. I told you, I'm not letting you go now. So just tell me when. Now, tomorrow, or when we're back in New York. Whenever it is, I'll take out the time to sit and talk about this with you."

"Hey, man." We both turned to our left and saw Brett standing there.

I resisted the urge to sigh and roll my eyes.

His timing couldn't be any worse.

"Do you mind if I dance with her now? I think you've been with her long enough, don't you?"

Adam rolled his eyes, taking a small step back before looking at me. "She's all yours." My breath hitched and I wanted to say something, something to keep him from walking away, but he turned around and walked past everybody almost immediately as Brett took his spot in front of me.

I danced with Brett for maybe five minutes before telling him my legs hurt and I had to take a break. On my way to sit with Emma and aunt Janice at a table, I glanced at the bar and Adam was standing right there with Aspen, both of them drinking while Remy and Ava took some pictures together. I sat down, sighing, and rested my arms on the table, putting my head down.

"What's wrong?" aunt Janice asked in confusion.

"She's confused, obviously."

I lifted my head, my brows pinched together.

"About what?" aunt Janice questioned.

"Between Adam and Brett. Duh." Emma shrugged.

Aunt Janice stared at me in surprise. "I never thought that would confuse her."

"It doesn't," I said quickly. "There's no question in my mind. Adam's my best friend."

"You mean he was," Emma said pointedly.

My eyes narrowed at her. "You've been on his team the whole time, why are you switching sides now?"

"Oh, I'm not. I'm still on his team. But you're the problem."

"What?"

"Yeah," Aunt Janice said slowly in agreement. "You don't see him the way he sees you... do ya?"

"Because you both know how he sees me, don't you? Amuse me. How does he see me?"

They both glanced at each other before laughing. I rolled my eyes, huffing. "He's totally into you, Em," Emma grinned.

"Head over heels," auntie nodded along. "Just how you were when you both were kids. You told me, remember?"

"You were?" Emma gasped.

"Yeah," I mumbled, "I had a crush on him when we were kids."

"She was in love with him," aunt Janice snickered and then looked at me. "Don't try to play it off."

"What happened then?" Emma wondered. Both of them turned to me.

"We had a huge fight," I admitted.

"Why?" Emma frowned.

I swallowed, tracing the tablecloth.

I stared at him, sitting cross-legged on my bed while he sat across from me, waiting for a reaction.

"Emmy? Can you please say something?"

I paused, looking away from him. "What do you want me to say? It looks like you've already made up your mind, Adam. Why didn't you tell me earlier? We're almost done packing to leave for college and you're telling me now? Why didn't you tell me after graduation? Or during summer break? Why did you wait so long?"

"I didn't know how to tell you, Rubes. I knew how upset you'd be."

"Oh, but this is better, isn't it?" I scoffed, scooting back and pulling my knees in, sitting against the headboard.

He grabbed the back of my legs and pulled me forward while sighing. "Ruby," he sighed.

"No, Adam. Don't 'Ruby' me. What were you expecting me to say?"

"Nothing. Just hear me out."

"You want to say more? Go ahead." I rolled my eyes.

"Come with me."

I blinked in surprise, not expecting that.

"You can come with me, you know?"

"All the way to Boston?" I laughed humorlessly. "Are you crazy? I can't do that, I told you I don't want to go so far from home. That's the whole reason I'm going to San Diego. And what about my internship, huh?"

"Then what about my scholarship, Emilia? If you can't give it all up for me, how can I?"

"It's not about giving things up." I threw his hands off my legs. "It's about our promise. You chose San Diego, Adam. That's why I arranged an internship there for myself. Do you know how many people Dad and I had to convince to help me out? I can't just throw it all away now because you changed your mind. I'm sticking to the plan and you're not," I snapped, giving him a slight shove.

He sighed, running a frustrated hand through his hair. "Emmy, this is an amazing opportunity for me. San Diego can't give me the scholarship Boston already has. I'll do so much better there, I'll get into the NFL easily. I can't give it up, Rubes, I can't give up football."

"But you can give me up, right?"

He stared at me, anger flashing across his eyes. "I didn't say that."

"You meant it."

"No, I didn't, Emilia. Goddamn it, please stop. You always do this. Every time we have the smallest argument, you blow it out of proportion and I end up running back and apologizing just so I can talk to you again."

"This isn't just a small argument, Adam! College is a life-changing decision. You can't give it up for me and neither can I. Do you see a solution here?"

He sighed and we both stayed quiet for a long time, thinking. "We'd see each other on holidays, Emilia," he said.

Him saying that was the last straw for me. Panic settled within my bones and I felt like my heart was collapsing.

"Adam, to me, you're not the best friend I can do with just seeing on the holidays. You've been a huge part of my life, I don't want to go to San Diego without you."

"Well, you have to, since you clearly don't want to come with me," he scoffed.

"You don't want to come with me either. What about that?"

"Then there is no solution here," he snapped at me, quickly getting off the bed.

"Adam," I stared at him while he pulled his shoes on.

"I can't do this anymore, Emilia. Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to finally fucking tell you about this? Maybe it would have been easier to just disappear on you. You're being so unsupportive."

"So are you!" I knelt on the bed, watching him grab his things. "Our careers are on the line, I understand how important this is for you, but at least try finding a solution with me."

"No. I'm done trying. Because it's never us trying together. It's always me finding solutions and you criticizing and finding the problem is every idea I have. So you find your own solution this time. And if you can't, then..." He shrugged, throwing his hands up and letting them fall as he came to stand in front of me.

"Adam..." I grabbed his arm.

He jerked it away, throwing my hand off.

"Adam!" I grabbed his shirt, forcing him to stay.

"Get off of me, Emilia," he said angrily, shoving my hand off a bit harder this time. "I'm tired of this. You were just arguing with me until it came down to me leaving. I'm not coming to San Diego with you. I'm asking for the last time, will you come to Boston with me? I'm going with or without you. I'm almost done packing and my flight is booked for this weekend."

I blinked, a lump forming in my throat. "You already booked a flight?"

He stared at me. "You got accepted to Boston too, remember? Just come with me, we'll figure it out once we're there."

"It's always me. The one giving things up for you. I'm running from one place to another to make your life just a bit easier if I can, Adam. I do everything for you, I'm always there for you."

"So am I, Emilia."

"But right now you're not."

He paused. "Neither are you." He grabbed his bag off my chair and stood in front of me again. "Look, if you want to come, just tell me. I'll book your flight, we'll leave together. And if you don't call me, then three days later, I'll be in Boston. And I don't know what's going to happen next. Figure it out, Em. Figure it out," he shrugged.

I grabbed his hand one more time. "Adam—"

He pulled away, walking out the door.

"We didn't speak for the next three days. I thought about it," I sighed with a shrug. "But I couldn't give up on San Diego."

"Did you at least say goodbye?"

"Nope. He was gone by the time I woke up that morning. No note, no message, no text. Nothing."

Emma hesitated but asked, "Did you call him?"

"No. He didn't call me, so why would I?"

"See, this was the problem," aunt Janice sighed. "You should have called him because you loved him more, Em."

"What?"

"Yeah, I kind of agree," Emma mumbled. "You loved him more."

I stared at them in disbelief. "You guys are so biased."

"No, really," Emma persisted. "You know, I think the way you loved him back then, he didn't love you like that back then. He loves you like that now. And you know what? Now that he does, he's fighting to keep you. The way you didn't fight to keep him." She offered me a small shrug.

"I agree with her," auntie nodded. "When you loved him, he didn't love you, honey. Not in that way. But now that he loves you, you don't love him like that. At least not yet. But since he loves you, he's doing everything he can to keep you. That's got to count for something, Em. How can you say he doesn't love you? Just see the way he looks at you."

"He's completely in love with you, Em," Emma added. "Everybody sees it."

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