《Everyone's a Catgirl!》Chapter 163: Data, Data, Data
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I had to constantly remind myself not to grip my axe too tightly. It wasn’t fear or nerves wracking my body—it was distrust. Watching Callie throw her javelin with such conviction left me eyeing her every other second of the journey. If Zahra hadn’t been there, Ravyn could’ve died right there on the sand. I’m not sure I could’ve held back if that had happened. I tried not to think about it.
With little more than the winds on our skin and the sands beneath our feet, the silence grew more prominent and uncomfortable. The air was so thick you could cut it with a knife. If I were a betting man—and I’m not, not anymore after Portia—then I would’ve thought the Edjerha would be the one to issue a challenge. If there was anyone’s trust we needed to acquire, it was Callie’s. I was just glad she didn’t have a weapon anymore.
As we trekked through the sands, I thought about how we could gain their trust. Magni had years of influence on us. It was clear that there was a great deal of disappointment and upset in the capital, but it seemed it was less about trying to topple Magni and more about trying to get in his good graces.
Despite our good intentions, it seemed we were just getting into more and more trouble with little to show for it. Even once we arrived at the oasis, there wasn’t any promise that they’d hear us out or even acknowledge our plight. In a best-case scenario, even if they agreed, they still had to convince King Magni the Magnificent to give us backstage passes.
Are we just wasting our time?
Despite my first assumptions, this situation was nothing like Shi Island. There were insane taxes, displays of power, and political issues that I had zero interest in and struggled to understand. It wasn’t like we could just go under the guise of an Ejderha and kidnap Magni as we did with Tristan. The thought of getting a sedative down the creep’s throat sent a chill down my spine. That aside, the Ejderha’s interactions implied they were always a moment away from murder, no matter the situation. One wrong move and you were on the other end of a spear.
Again I reminded myself not to tighten my grip.
“We’re here,” Zahra said, glancing at Tristan over her shoulder.
I swallowed hard. Chances were, there’d be at least one or two Ejderha here. What would they do? Instigate a fight? Bow down? Disagreements—to me, at least—tended to quickly devolve into carnage. The expression ‘Might is Right’ came to mind.
As we neared closer, I caught the chestnut-colored hair of a catgirl at the farther end of the oasis. She was resting on her knees, staring at something in the water. After a moment, she retrieved what looked like a turtle’s shell from beside her and dipped it into the water. She lifted it to her lips, then halted. Her ears perked, and her chin shot up to look at us.
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Wide eyes stared, and she set the shell back on the ground to her left. The catgirl grabbed something on her right, and, as she stood, I could see it—a poleaxe similar in make to Ceres’.
Another Ejderha. Glad I didn’t get my hopes up.
The catgirl readied her poleaxe.
Aliye raised a closed fist. “Hold!”
The hunters came to a halt, and we stopped with them.
“I will go talk to her,” said Aliye.
“Yeah, wouldn’t want to mess with the chain of command,” said a snarky Callie.
“Be quiet,” said Ravyn.
Aliye shouldered past us without another word, skidding down the small hill of sand and meeting the other, I assumed, Ejderha. They each made a welcoming gesture, crossing one closed fist over their chest, then relaxed before they began to talk.
“Any idea what they’re talking about?” I whispered to Keke.
Keke shook her head. “Not at this distance.”
“I really hope this works out,” said Cannoli. “I’m tired of the fighting.”
“Nobody asked you to come out here,” said Callie.
“Bitch, are you even listening?” asked Ravyn. “We just told you why we’re here. Least you can do is cooperate or shut the hell up.”
“Our island’s business is our own,” Callie said, narrowing her gaze. “We have the situation under control.”
“Yeah, I can tell,” I said, making no attempt to hide my sarcasm. “You’re doing a bang-up job here. Awards all around.”
“Don’t take that tone with me.”
I clenched my jaw. Before I could whisper anything through my teeth, Tristan spoke.
“Stop that. This isn’t going to get us anywhere. I think we should calm down and have a civil discussion once Aliye returns.” Tristan sniffed. “You might not like to hear it, but it’s important that the islands work together. The queen, especially, will be grateful.”
“We don’t need a queen,” Callie spat. “We have a king.”
Yeah. Some king.
Before the situation could escalate further, Aliye waved us over. “It’s fine! Come on down!”
“What fortuitous timing,” said Ceres, leading the group down with Zahra.
We kept in line as we descended the small hill, stopping a few feet away from Aliye and the other Ejderha.
“This is Zutto,” Aliye said, gesturing to the catgirl beside her.
Zutto raised a brow, drumming her fingers against the shaft of her weapon. “You can’t be serious. You let these brigands take you by surprise? You’re slipping, Aliye. Keep this up, and Sanrai will have your head.”
Aliye visibly swallowed. “Let me worry about her.”
Zutto shrugged. “Your funeral.” She cocked her head in our direction. “So, what the hell do you want?”
“We want to speak with Magni,” Tristan said, stepping forward. “We’ve tried to go through the proper channels, but nothing we’ve done has worked. I’m sorry it’s come to this, but this seemed the only way to get his attention.”
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“Hostages,” Zutto said, nodding and averting her caramel gaze.
“I suppose you could say that,” Tristan said with a hint of reluctance. “I promise, this is not with ill intent.”
“I’ve heard that before.”
“Please. Once we have acquired an audience with King Magni, we will vacate,” said Ceres, a hand across her chest. I wish she hadn’t made a promise like that. Who knew where this would go once we spoke with Magni? I had a feeling he wouldn’t leave willingly, and Cailu wouldn’t be happy if we didn’t bring him. “You have my word.”
Keke and Cannoli glanced at me, seemingly just as uncomfortable about Ceres’ promise.
“How about a trade?” Lara asked with more enthusiasm than I felt was warranted. Did she not know the severity of the situation? “I could expand your water supply.”
Zutto blinked. “You’re joking.”
Lara shook her head. “Water is quite proud here, and she’s in a good mood today. I could—”
“Don’t mind her,” I said, shaking my head. With Ceres’ promise and Lara’s… whatever that was, the words ‘BAD END’ popped into my head. “Just please tell us if—”
“I wasn’t done talking,” said Lara. She turned toward me with her hands clasped in front of her. “Service, Grace, Urgency. We have offered you our service. Now please allow me my grace.”
“Sister,” Destiny said with an admiring smile.
“I could puke,” muttered Callie.
“Can we just get this over with? My kitten is waiting at home for me,” said a red-headed catgirl in the hunting party. “She’s hungry and doesn’t have anyone else to look after her.”
“Yeah!” cried another catgirl from the party.
Soon, the cries grew louder and louder, muffling any of our attempts to calm the situation. I put my hands out and tried to raise my voice, but the catgirls continued to overwhelm us with their demands.
“Quiet!” Lara bellowed.
Someone’s done being interrupted.
At that, silence returned. Catgirls passed confused and disgusted looks. Lara cleared her throat and coughed into her closed fist before continuing.
“I believe I can expand your water supply.” She raised a single finger as if talking down to a child. “But you must secure us a meeting with Magni. Can it be done?”
Aliye and Zutto glanced at each other.
“What proof do we have that you can even do this thing you claim?” asked Zutto. “I don’t want my tail yanked. If Magni hears about this, and you can’t even provide water—”
“Yes, I cannot promise it. That much is true,” Lara admitted. “But I’m confident that Water will listen to me.”
Aliye raised her brow. “Water will… listen to you?”
It’s going, and it’s going, and… we lost it.
“Observe.” Lara extended her arms out in front of her, a little like a zombie, and began to walk. I couldn’t see any rhyme or reason for what she was doing, but she continued. Making her way to the edge of the oasis, she sniffed at the air, turning her head this way and that. “That way,” she whispered. Lara walked to her left, making a wide berth around the rim of the oasis. After a while, she stopped some distance away and fell to her knees. “Here!”
You can’t be serious.
“I’ll go see,” Zahra offered, barring the rest of the group with her arm. “Stay here.”
“Okay,” said Tristan.
We watched as Zahra, Aliye, and Zutto moved to stand next to Lara, their curiosity piqued. Mumbles and mutters clouded the air as a sigh escaped Ravyn’s lips.
“This is fucking insane,” said Ravyn.
“Water! Water! Squawwwk! Under the ground! Squawwwk!” cried Ball.
Ravyn frowned. “What? Bally, what did you just say?”
Ball’s eyes closed into half-slits. “In the ground! Squawwwk!”
Lara rose to her feet and put her arms out at her sides. “Stay back,” she said. Zahra, Aliye, and Zutto took a few paces back to give her room. After a few seconds passed, a cool breeze blew past me. Soon, a blue-green glow began to envelop Lara’s body, outlining her with an otherworldly light. More time passed, and soon after, she spoke again. “[Summon Water]!”
The sand beneath her began to move—ripples of grain suddenly given life scattered around her in chaotic formations. The ground dipped beneath Lara’s feet, and the sand under her turned from pale beiges and yellow to a deep brown.
Water droplets sparkled in the morning sun as they rose from the sand. They gradually formed spheres around Lara’s shoulders. At first, there was only one. Then there were two, and then three, until finally, four spheres of water floated around her. Each of the spheres was about the size of a baseball.
“What is this?” I muttered.
Lara let her arms fall to her sides as she turned around to face us. She smiled wide. “Say hello to Water!”

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