"It is in the human nature

since times imemorial.."

-quote from the ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ Manifesto

"Marko, Marko!"

The voice woke him up, and the sudden realization of who it was instantly lifted a heavy weight off his chest.

"Marko, it's okay, I'm here with you..."

He realized he was crying. Probably has been in his sleep too, and that's why his cousin woke him up.

"You had a bad dream, huh. It's okay, you can tell me... I'm with you..."

It's okay..

*

Looking through the clothes, pretending to be interested... well, this is half the truth. Marko was somewhat captivated by them. He wasn't particularly curious about the clothes themselves, nor did he care enough to think about buying them, but they did remind him of his childhood. He randomly thought of his older cousin too, how they would play in their parents' stores. Hiding between the racks, pretending they're forts or banks.

"Ahem, you many come in now."

Part of it was also killing time. The old owner of the store asked him to wait a moment after their short conversation, and slipped behind some door in the back of the store. He slipped back out just as quickly, to the point you could barely make out the door opening, and you definitely couldn't tell what's behind it.

Marko let go of the thick cotton fabric of the shirts he was testing and followed him.

"Please go in."

"What about you, you won't come?"

"It's alright", and with that the man gave a quick short smile and went back to his front desk. The smile seemed genuine enough, at least Marko thought so.

He finally reached to grab the door handle, but hesitated. He became self-aware of his heartbeat, rapidly increasing. He looked at the back of his hand, nervous, at the scribble on it. The yellow door handle felt cold in his hand, almost imploring him to let go.

And he did. He managed to catch a breath again, and it felt ecstatic, almost like letting go of a heavy burden. This clarity of mind, it only strengthened his conviction to open that door. He reached with his left hand and didn't hesitate anymore.

Marko entered a small room, with a high ceiling and whitewashed walls spotted here and there with old tapestry or weird decorations. What should've been the back wall was instead a similarly painted old looking wooden wall, with a door in the middle, and windows made of thick green glass above them.

Without needing anyone to tell him he go forward, he did, and opened the door. The handle was dancing in place. It was surprisingly hard to get it to open properly, and the squeaky hinges started singing.

What followed the total opposite of the previous room. This one was smaller, or at least it seemed so, and it was covered all around. Marko couldn't even make out the color of the walls behind old draperies, brown and mustard with white models on them. Thin golden sheets curled up between thicker and heavier dark blue ones covered the entire ceiling, and candle lamps and small chandeliers fell like rain all around. The chandeliers also held candles inside rather than bulbs.

There were also books, in the hundreds, thrown around shelves of what looked like black ivory, and paintings of deserted mountains and sketches of stones and churches were hanged all around. Statues of cats and dolls, handmaid of wool, depicting weird monkeys and rats.

In the middle of the room, in front of the largest shelf, sat an old desk with a blue tablecloth on top, similar to the fabrics on the ceiling, except this one had interesting black and golden markings and models on the edges.

At the desk sat a woman who looked a little older than the man in the store. Her head was covered by a brown kerchief, with green squares. Her bloody red lipstick and earrings stood out. She wore a green dress with loose sleeves that were layered near the wrists. Her look reminded Marko of his grandma.

"Well sit down here young mister, how can this old hag help you kiss you."

The accent immediately caught Marko's attention. It was just now that he noticed the slightly lighter than olive skin of the old woman, and remembered that the old man looked similar.

Guess I haven't noticed, huh..

"Well, last night while sleeping I dreamt of this place", Marko said as he sat down on the old chair by the desk.

"Uhum, dreams are powerful things my honey. What dream did you have of this place kiss you."

He paused for a second, then placed both of his hands on the table, drawings up.

"Do you recognize this?"

The old woman opened her eyes as if to adjust them and squinted as she lowered her head.

"Hmm, hmm.. what do you know of this young dear."

"I saw it in some book my grandma had in her attic. It said prayer book and mostly had prayers and stuff in it but it also had drawings like these."

I need to make sure she spills something..

"My grandma, had a kerchief almost like that you wear... more red. You look a lot like her, if I may say."

"Mhm, mhm." The old woman was holding his hand, analyzing it. "I do know this spell dear, pretty old standard stuff."

Spell.. spell?

"Mhmm yes I do."

She finally let got of his hand and got back up. She looked at him with a more straight forward face.

"So what can I help you here, kiss you."

"Can you tell me more about this spell you talk about? Or these drawings?"

"Yes, it's in the books here look around you kiss you. A lot more stuff."

This is... holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit holy sh...

"Can I get one of the books? Like buy them or borrow or something."

"No."

This was the most matter of fact response Marko has gotten all day. There was no 'dear' or 'kiss you' or smiles. Just a deadpan face and a short response.

No?

"No? Why not... No?"

"No. If you don't know, then you don't need to know. These books not for you."

"Is there any other-"

"No."

The woman went back to her mannerisms.

"Now if there's more you want, look at the clothes in the front as much as you like dear see if there's anything you want I'm sure old man can do some good deal for you." And with that she lot go of his hand and urged him to leave by staring. Marko understood it and didn't take his time storming out of the store.

"Come back for more!" he heard the old man as the door closed behind him.

There was it again, the business outside. People going left and right, as if aimlessly. To Marko they seemed like mindless drones, thought after a moment of reconsideration he thought of their lives, how unique and weird they might be too. Everyone is the main person for themselves, the main character in their own world... his world is no more weirder.

NO!

This time it is. That old woman, the store, the dreams... the things he's seen, these are not something everyone around him would see every other day. In a sense this made Marko feel special, like there's more meaning to his life than others.. these narcissistic thoughts would visit his mind sometimes, like leaves scattered by the wind hitting a window.

There was a car parked next to the store, 2 men sitting inside it wearing sunglasses. Marko didn't pay mind to it at first, but the observation kept bothering him as they started the car shortly after he left and followed him. He went down the road by his block heading towards the Dece zone to take the tram to the Orchid area to go to the bigger supermarket. It's been weeks since he's last been grocery shopping after all and he was looking for some stuff he couldn't find at the local one or the bodega.

The car parked behind the tram station, the men never getting out, and as Marko got in the tram, the car started following it again. The paranoia is kicking in again. He tried his best to look like he hasn't noticed them.

At the first station after the Dece bridge, Marko suddenly got off and took it on foot again. At the first little street he took the corner right and then another right on a longer street. This was going by a school until a intersection back at the end of the bridge with the Splai street. Marko's favorite street.

The car was still behind him, always creeping in slowly, as if it was a feline ready to jump it's pray.

Oh yeah? Well we're in my hood so fuck you!

Marko took a sharp turn left and started running on the sidewalk, school yard and fence on his right and a narrow street on his left. After a while the car took this turn also, not knowing that this claustrophobic street stretches all the way to the other side of the neighbourhood with no other streets connecting to it, like a straw. With a car that is.

After running for a while Marko went through the little parking space of the school to get back on the Splai street. The men finally got out of their car. They were following him on foot now, though never running or alerted, even stopping to go to the bodega next to the school to get some drinks. They blend in. Or is he just imagining crazy things again...

Marko didn't take any chances. At the end of the Splai street there's a big roundabout you can make to cross the Louis bridge, and right before it a large park. It was basically a big circle, with the 'main' park with the slides and swings in the middle, and a large space with trees and benches all around them. Surrounding the park was a little street with a parking space for the apartment buildings around, and little pathways connecting them to other streets or parking lots. Marko took the last one and went to cross the street that intersects with Splai before the bridge. Blocks all around him, this is where he grew up... basically a maze of communist apartment buildings, grey and tired. He liked them.

Another bodega at the corner of the one by the sidewalk, and another little street leading from the main one left to this store. Parks here and there, little patches of grass and bushes with the occasional trees. Marko liked to call them "urban flora" or "apartment gardens". There was nothing impressive or aesthetically pleasing about them, but Marko loved them. It reminded him of how he used to play here as a kid, or the one behind his uncle's block where he would play with his cousin. At the end where the road takes a turn left Marko went between the blocks and got out into another small street that led into another bigger one. Alongside Splai and Sava which he had crossed, this was the 3rd of the 4 main streets of this neighbourhood. This was where he grew up.

Zaban.

Stores left and write, grocery shops, second hand clothing, small supermarket, bodegas, clothing materials, spray cans and paints, a butchery, some bakeries... just the usual busy street in this city.

Such was another outlet clothing store that he went inside. This was his.

"How's the store going today Maya." he called out.

The store was an older apartment on the base floor of an apartment buildings. This is how most were. It was separated in 3 main 'lots', ex-rooms of the apartment. The one in the middle and on the right were his, the one on the left he was renting. There was a carpet cleaning company there now. People would come in with their carpets, place the order and they would take it to the main body where the proper cleaning gets done.

"Heey, Marko!" The brunette woman peeked her head out. "What brought you here."

Those 2 spaces were originally separated stores, but Marko decided to unite them again breaking a door in the wall in the back, leaving 1 entrance to the store. The right one was female clothing and this one was male clothing.

"Eh I have some stuff to do in the area and I decided to stop by a little see how you're doing." Of course he had to lie, he couldn't tell her he came here to hide from shady people following him around after he visited a weird store he saw in a dream...

Speaking of, Marko looked outside and saw a car parked next to the catholic school across. Two men inside it, dressed similarly and wearing sunglasses as well, though different men.

Shit.

"Any clients?"

"Eh, morning was busy but nothing for like 2 hours now. Getting ready to close"

"My stuff still here?"

"In the bathroom check the middle shelf next to the jeans."

Marko always had a pair or 2 of clothes here to change into... just in case he needed them. Never know when you break a sweat.

He started changing, and noticed Maya was eyeing him.

This bitch.

"You haven't come by my place in a while". He didn't respond. "C'mon, I can cook you something and stuff."

Marko considered it while putting his shirt on. If there were 2 at the store and 2 here, who's to say there aren't 2 more at my place. Or, Arregat was close to my place anyway, those 2 could just return there.

"Sure, but like I said I got some stuff to do so I'll only come by later."

She seemed happy about it.

"Don't bother with dinner, sorry, I'm coming LATE late.

She started giggling. "I don't mind as long as you come."

You're way too old for this shit..

Marko looked at the car outside again, still parked there.

"I'll go through the back, need to get in that direction anyway. See you later."

He somehow squeezed through the small storeroom, having to pull aside a mattress to open the door, and left the 'apartment' into the main body of the building, the 'stairs' they're called. It looked just as it did when he was little. He pulled his phone out as he left the building and started making his way through the concrete labyrinth again.

yo, can you see me at the Banana Joe

*

It was dark outside, but even darker when he went inside, somehow.

It was a rugged, dilapidated bar from the 80s on both the outside and inside. It was one of those places where only cheap drinkers, hobos and whores went. Not the kind of place you would wanna go to for a casual drink with your friends, but perfect for meetings like this, to discuss... discreet matters.

San was already waiting for him at a small wooden table in the corner, chugging on a Heineken.

"I got you one too don't worry."

There were no chairs around, just a couple at the bar. They were sitting on beer crates stacked on top of each other.

"So why did you bring me to this shithole, might as well drink medicine under the bridge lol."

"No one followed you or something, right?" Marko probably sounded crazy to his friend. He took a look behind his shoulder to scan the bar. Just an old hobo drinking some cheap whiskey.

"Who would follow me, you retarded?"

Well there's a way to put it..

Marko started drinking his beer nervously. How would he open this discussion. How would he tell his best bud what he plans on doing, and for what ridiculous reasons..

He was wearing the usual stuff. Camo pants, boots and a black shirt. He was kind of short, short black curly hair, it looked rough, and an 'immature' beard. He wasn't fat really, but he wasn't skinny nor muscled. San kind of looked like a log, Marko often thought.

"You still obsessed with your army shit?" Marko said jokingly.

"It's not 'army shit' man, sigh. It's crazy stuff tho I'm telling you, I saw how to build some smoke bombs real cheap, tried it too with different colors." He started laughing maniacally. It wasn't 'evil' or 'scary', sounded more goofy than anything.

"Yeah, but I mean like you still shooting and stuff?"

"Yeah I just got an AK", followed by the same maniacal laugh.

"How the fuck did you get an AK?"

"Dude from Bins. You know I told you about a guy I know, Parsan?"

"Yeah.."

"He has a cousin in Germany who's on some gang shit. I talked to Parsan and he managed to get me one through his cousin, bought it off him."

He finished his beer.

"Why you askin, wanna come shoot with us?"

"Nah, it's more like..."

He was nervous to talk about it. How do I even start this? He chugged his beer too and broke the ice.

"I need you to get me a gun. Not much, just a pistol maybe."

He raised his eyebrow.

"What for?"

"I wanna rob a store."

San broke into laughter, then finally responded.

"Ok."

He was very casual about crazy stuff like this. To him, nothing seemed crazy.

Do I really wanna push him to do this? Crazy motherfucker...

"You wanna rob it with me?"

"Sure."

That casual response again...

"When?"

It was Friday. Arregat was going to be close during the weekend, so that would be the most ideal time to strike.

"You got stuff on you in the city?"

"I mean, I got a pistol for you but nothing for me. Need to go to Bins."

"Go in the morning, we can hit it tomorrow night they closed on weekends."

San didn't even bother to ask what they were robbing, why or what for. He just seemed excited to do stupid things.

That laughter again.

"Let's goo, let's kick these motherfuckers!"

Marko took his phone out to look at them time.

11:32pm.

Fuck, I told Maya I'm going to her place.

Marko wasn't feeling the same excitement San was feeling, but they could find a common ground to express their feelings. He pointed at their empty bottles

"Wanna go for more?"

*

"Fuck, fuck! Fuck yes, baby.."

His mind was numb. He was tired, he was drunk, he was fucking...

"Give it to me my baby boy."

You bitch.

"You got a son my age you bitch."

"Oh yes.."

They were in missionary. Marko got up to look at her as he kept trusting. He slapped her then moved his hand to her throat.

"You're fucking a boy your son's age, you nasty whore."

She loved getting choked.

"Yes baby, I'm a bad mom... fuck mommy harder!"

Fuck..

He placed his other hand on her left breast. They were big, and ferm, unsually firm for a 44 year old woman. He thought of Alexia. Maya was nothing like her. She was quite tall, with those firm tits and a big ass too. Brunette, always wearing red lipstick, smoking.. always seducing him with her eyes alone, or a few words. She wasn't beautiful but she had that super feminine allure. On the opposite, Alexia was short with no tits and a plump little ass. Pale. She looked frail by comparison. Comparing them was like comparing a grown up woman and a little girl, Marko always thought, and that's how it was in a sense. Alexia was pretty though...

He went back to bite those bloody red lips.

"You fucking bitch.."

"Yeah baby mommy's a bitch, fuck her.."

Their filthy words muffled by kisses and groans.

Alexia was pretty... it was her Marko was thinking of right now. As he was holding Maya's throat, mating like beasts in heat, he thought of Alexia, how would she feel like... That, the act, the words spoken, it drove him soon enough... but before he reached it he saw one more person.

"FUCK!" in unison, like a weird song sung by bad singers.

After catching their breaths for a couple of minutes, sitting next to each other, Marko finally got up.

Maya reached on the stand next to her and lighted a cigarette.

"Give me one too."

She gave him a cigarette but not the lighter.

"Come light it on mine."

Marko placed the tip on hers and inhaled. As he did they looked in each others eyes. That feminine allure again...

He got up still naked and grabbed the phone.

"I gotta talk to someone real quick.."

"Sure baby."

He went on the balcony closing the door behind, and the cold air was immediately there to brush against his skin. He could feel his body radiating heat.

He closed his eyes and made a call, and his heart skipped a beat when the phone started ringing. Then skipped again once when she answered.

"Yes?"

"How you doing cuz."

"Marko? Hii, you changed your number again?"

"This ain't mine."

"Oh, okay.."

Of course she knew what this meant, at this hour..

"Anything happened, why you calling this late?"

"Nothing just wanted to talk, it's been a while since we talked.."

"Yeah well whose fault is that! You never call, you never answer, you always change your number, you never visit, never home..." She paused for a second. "I'm sorry, it's just been a long time since we talked."

She was right, he did avoid them, not intentionally though, at least not for the most part. He did feel guilty about it.

"Yeah that's my fault you right... listen, I called cause..."

He wasn't sure how things would go after tomorrow. What could potentially happen, or he would have to hide for a while.

"I'm going on a vacation you know. So you won't hear from me for like a couple of weeks."

"Well, not like I do anyway!"

"Yeah, but I wanna make that right. I'll call more, visit you guys... I do miss you. Just not for the next two weeks tho. Just wanted to tell you like if you wanna come by or go to the store ask about me... I'm off for 2 weeks that's all."

"It's ok I get it. Going with someone?"

Marko was kind of a loner, his cousin knew it. She's known him well since they were little.

"Yeah, yeah.. going with San and a couple more friends."

There's the lies again..

"Good, good... that's good for you, I'm happy for you Marko. Listen, about calling and that stuff, it's not like we wanna know everything about you or something, just.. check in once in a while. We miss you, you know... I miss you..."

"Yeah... I'll try more I promise."

"Alright, alright. Have fun on your vacation!"

His cigarette was running out.

"Can't wait to see you again."

"Yeah, yeah... me too.. love you cuz."

He closed the phone and sat there staring. He was on the 4th floor of the building. The city was lying still below him, so calm and silent at this hour of the day...

He sat there staring at nothing until the cold was unbearable, then finally went back inside after deleting the number he called.

"Who you talked to baby?"

There she was, with her incredible body. The red on her lips got smudged from their kissing and biting, but she reapplied it while he was outside. Laying sideways on her elbow, head resting on her hand, presenting her body like a work of art. The upper part at least. The thin silky blanket covering her hips and legs.

Marko was hesitant for a second.

"Alexia. I'm going on a vacation for a week or 2 with some friends and she's coming too."

More lies..

"You with that girl yet?"

"No.."

"I'm guessing Alexia doesn't know about this.." and she started rubbing one of her breasts with her finger. Her nails were painted red too.

"Of course not, are you crazy."

Marko started shivering a little. The cold outside got him.

"Oh, you cold baby?"

Maya pulled the silky covers up, revealing the main art piece.

"Come back to mommy.."

You fucking bitch.

They fucked more. It has been a while, and Marko didn't know how things are going to go with the Arregat business, so he gave it his all.

It's been a while...

He came to Maya back then too, a little after that night at Alexia's birthday party. Nerves, fuzzy mind after the crazy stuff he saw... pent up... It should've been her, Alexia, he thought again... imagining the frame of her body, her silhouette, grabbing her... and as he did he imagined the other too, her voice...

Fuck, fuck you brain... why..

His hand went to grab her hair and he started groaning again. They were like animals in heat.

"That's it baby mommy loves her bad boy."

He needed Maya to relieve his stress. He gave it his all, and they eventually passed out.

That night he slept deeply in her arms.