"Good morning," Hazō said, coming through the door to the mission room with the others trailing behind him. "We're looking for some short-term missions. Can you help us?"

The desk chūnin was a middle-aged woman with a neatly-turned-out uniform, the left leg of which was pinned up over the stump of her leg. Her left hand was missing the ring and little fingers and there were vicious burn scars down the left side of her face. Her hair was long and carefully styled to cover the worst of them, but there was only so much that could be done to conceal the damage.

Hazō didn't even blink. There were too many scarred and wounded ninja veterans around for it to be noteworthy, even if her wounds were unusually severe.

The woman did a doubletake as she recognized him, then offered a smile and a respectful bow of the head. "You're the Gōketsu kids, right? I'm Ito. Ito Ino. Hopefully you've already been told this, but thank you for your service. What you had to go through...it must have been horrible. Truly, the Will of Fire burns bright in all of you."

"Thank you," Hazō said. He left it at that.

"Indeed, thank you," Keiko said. "We have been told that exactly once before, by a civilian. It is pleasing to hear it from a ninja as well. You do not object that we were mi...labeled as missing-nin before? I was concerned that people would not be able to adjust their perceptions of us once the truth was revealed."

Ito laughed. "Lord Jiraiya trusts you so much that he's willing to adopt you. That says everything that needs to be said." She looked down and started shuffling through the scrolls on her desk. "Short term mission, huh? How short are you looking for?"

"Ideally we'd like to get a few things that we could do back-to-back in the next couple days," Noburi said. "Just enough to make rent money for a week or two, but we want to focus on training for the Chūnin Exams."

Ito's eyebrows rose. "I heard about those, but I hadn't heard who was nominated. No insult intended, but are you guys sure you want to do that? I mean...you're a little young yet, right? And it's Mist. The Mizukage is famous for holding grudges, isn't he?"

"Hah!" Kagome-sensei said. "Stinking rat stinker's not going to be bothering us anymore, now is he?" His eyes widened slightly and he clapped both hands over his mouth, then quickly yanked them away. "I mean, yes. Yes, he's probably going to be angry. Holding a grudge, definitely." His eyes flicked from side to side. "Probably be waiting for us at the gates with a bunch of ANBU. Or whatever they call them in Mist. And maybe giant...um...fish? He's the fish summoner, isn't he?"

Ito eyed him for a moment, then shook her head. "Right. Well, anyway, back on the topic of missions. I've got some standard bounty work—farmers have put in reports of various chakra beasts in their area, we pay a bounty for every left ear of that species that you bring in, or another specified bodypart if the critter doesn't have external ears. The individual bounties aren't much, but they add up and it's a target-rich environment. Looks like there's some kind of migration going on, because I've got over two hundred steelback sightings as well as a bunch of other things.

"If that doesn't interest you, there's some courier work. Take a storage scroll full of stuff to various places—it doesn't pay much but it's low-risk and won't take more than a day. I've got Keishi and Tanzaku Gai that are marked as urgent; they pay a little better and you can out-and-back to either of them.

"Failing that, I've got a homesteading job. A group of civilians want to set up farms two day's wagon travel south of Leaf. You would need to escort them there and provide security while they construct their initial fortification. 'Security' includes both guarding the perimeter, hunting enough to feed the expedition, and clearing the local area of threats. You won't get bounties for what you kill; that's included in the mission price. Caravans don't move as fast as individual wagons, so it'll take three or four days to get there, then at least a week while they get their act together and build the walls and houses. I'm counting it as short-term because the contract is only for three ninja, so you could rotate it between you. Pays well, and it's fixed-rate so if you can hustle them along the hourly goes up."

The team exchanged glances. "That seems like a limited selection," Keiko said carefully. "Bounty hunting, courier missions, and guard duty for farmers?"

Ito shrugged unapologetically. "Those are the C-ranks I've got right now. If your sensei and the jōnin commander both sign off on you doing a B-rank mission that's fine, but genin don't go on A-ranks." She gestured off to the side where a giant stack of papers balanced precariously on a table against the wall. "Plenty of D-ranks, but those aren't hardly worth it."

"Smart," Kagome-sensei grunted. "No point letting the young ones die for nothing just because they can't be bothered to keep their tags not on fire even after you tell them and tell them and tell them but do they listen? Nooooo."

Ito eyed him carefully for a moment, much the way a civilian might eye a growling dog. "Yes, sir," she said at last. "Very sensible, sir."

"May I see the mission details, please?" Keiko asked, stepping forward with her hand extended. She took the three scrolls from Ito and flicked through them, glancing back and forth for a moment before rolling them up and handing them back.

"I believe the bounties would be the best fit for our skills and available time," Keiko said. "The reported number of steelbacks is improbable; I find it far more likely that some of those are duplicate sightings of a smaller number of animals. Regardless, if there are even a quarter of the indicated number then this mission should provide the best profit to time ratio."

"Good enough for me," Hazō said. "How does this work, ma'am?"

"Works for me too, thanks," Noburi said tartly.

Hazō nodded an apology which Noburi silently accepted, then both boys turned back to the desk chūnin who was failing to suppress her amusement at the byplay.

"Simple enough," she said. "You each make your mark here to indicate that you're accepting the mission. You're all going together?" She waited for the answering chorus of assent. "Okay, well, there's enough of you that I'll mark the mission filled. Don't want too many people combing the same area tripping over each other. How long do you plan to stay out?"

Everyone looked at Keiko.

"Thirty-three hours," she said clearly. "We will return by sundown tomorrow."

Ino's eyebrows shot up. "That's not a lot of time," she said carefully. "Particularly when you're splitting the money five ways, it's unlikely that you'll find enough targets to make a worthwhile amount unless you spend at least two or three days onsite."

"Thirty-three hours," Keiko said firmly.

Ino shrugged again. "Up to you. Anyway, I'll keep the mission off the table until then. Do you want to file a rescue mission before you go? Some teams like to leave a mission on the books saying 'if we aren't back by such-and-such a time, come find us.' You need to leave a bond equal to the total payment for the mission, though."

Noburi laughed. "We'll be fine," he said. "We've done a little hunting in the past."

Ito smiled, the expression rendered horrible by the way the scarring of her cheek stretched her mouth out of shape. "I imagine you have. Okay, good enough. Here's a copy of the details, have at it." She handed a scroll to Keiko and waited politely for them to exit the room before going back to her paperwork. Hazō glanced back as he went out the door; Ito was shaking her head, probably at the folly and arrogance of youth.

o-o-o-o​

hungry. still no yumroot, but plenty of dumb biters who thought spines weren't sharp, and dumber meat that didn't know the range spines could fly. not enough big ones, though. still hungry.

bleh, fog. hate fog. can't smell, can't see far. how find yumroot or dumb meat when can't smell or see? how find rest of drift? hungry, too. stab fog? stab, stab! ...nope. still fog.

keep looking for yumroot. get nose close to ground, maybe still smell.

bleh, tired

o-o-o-o​

"Back so soon? Did you want to extend y—"

WHUMP

Ito's desk bounced as Kagome unsealed a blood-spotted bag the size of his torso atop it. Several stacks of paper went sliding off onto the floor.

The scarred chūnin stared at the massive bag for a moment then calmly looked at Kagome, who was busy rooting in his backpack. "You know you were only supposed to bring back the ears, right?"

"Of course," Kagome muttered, not looking up as he rummaged. The sealmaster was soaking wet and covered in purple mud. He had been too embarrassed to explain what happened and no one was dumb enough to push him about it; sometimes you just had to learn to live with the pain of unsatisfied curiosity. "What, you think we're stupid? Just because we're not from your stinking village doesn't mean we're idiots. Let me tell you something—"

"It is only the ears, ma'am," Hazō said quickly, leaning forward to untie the neck of the bag. "Mostly steelbacks, but a few dozen chakra voles, the heads off some sort of wriggly snake thing, sections of the nest from some chakra wasps with a fire aura, and a few other things."

Ito looked inside. "Huh."

She lifted the trashcan up onto the desk and started counting ears into it. The final total left her looking impressed.

"How in the world did you find that many that quickly, let alone kill and ear them all?"

Kagome-sensei opened his mouth and then caught himself. Hazō could almost see the memory of their earlier conversation play out in the man's mind.

o-o-o-o​

"Kagome-sensei, the desk chūnin is almost certainly going to ask us how we found and killed so many creatures so quickly. Now, what are you going to say to that?"

"Well, I'm certainly not going to tell her about Noburi's mist sensing and mist drain! That would be stupid. Almost as stupid as letting all those tags get soaked and ruined in all the mist."

"I said I was sorry. How was I supposed to know that—"

"Focus please, both of you."

"Sorry."

"Kagome, you were saying...?"

"I'll tell her that it's secret bloodline stuff that she doesn't need to know anything about and she should keep her stinking mouth closed if she knows what's good for her!"

"That answer, while better than what I had anticipated, still leaks the information that our methods were related to bloodlines."

"Oh, um, well, I'll tell her that it didn't have anything to do with bloodlines and—"

"Sensei, that draws attention to the idea of bloodlines again."

"Oh. Yeah. Well, I'll tell her that she doesn't need to know any of our secret jutsu tricks and she definitely shouldn't look into them or into what the weather was like or anyth—"

"Probably don't want to mention weather either, Kagome. Don't want them thinking about fog as anything special."

"Okay, let's start over. Sensei, the desk chūnin is almost certainly going to ask us how we found and killed so many steelbacks so quickly. Now, what are you going to say to that?"

"...nothing?"

"Very good."

o-o-o-o​

"We're just good hunters, ma'am," Hazō said cheerfully. "How'd we do?"

Ito ran some beads back and forth on an abacus and then jotted down a very comfortable figure. "Take this down to the treasury department," she said, holding out the note. "They'll see about the disbursement."

"Thank you very much, ma'am," Hazō said, taking the paper with a grin. The others added their thanks and the team turned for the door.

o-o-o-o​

Mari-sensei looked up from chopping vegetables as the team came in and did a doubletake as she saw Kagome skywalking a few inches above the floor in order to not leave muddy footprints behind him. "What happened to you?"

"Nothing," he mumbled.

She studied him with a jaundiced eye. "Okay, well, go scrub up. Dinner is in an hour. Kids, you can help me with prep."

The genin moved into the kitchen without objection, and started the familiar ritual of chopping meat and vegetables. It had been a while since Hazō had used a knife for that instead of using a macerator, but it was a homey task that reminded him of the time before they joined Leaf. Being missing-nin had had its challenges, but it had been simpler. Hunt and gather what you want for dinner, or risk a quick stop at a settlement and put up with Kagome insisting that they move camp by at least sixty miles afterwards. Let Kagome set up the defenses so that you didn't have to worry about anything except flyers and tunnelers. Relax, train, research, spend time with Akane...none of this politics and walking on eggshells lest you accidentally insult the wrong person. No worrying about the future—oh, speaking of which....

"Sensei, what can you tell us about past Chūnin Exams?" Keiko asked, just as Hazō was opening his mouth.

Mari-sensei was busy frying noodles in one pan, vegetables in another, and stirring a sauce in a third, but she seemed to have no trouble fielding the question at the same time.

"They vary from year to year," she said. "Never quite the same twice. The host village chooses all the challenges and is responsible for supplying facilities and being the primary enforcers of the rules, although everyone is expected to cooperate on that front. The visitors never know what to expect until they get there—part of the home-field advantage.

"Killing is strictly forbidden. Every village pays a bond to the host village when they arrive; there's an investigation if one of your ninja kills anyone outside your delegation, gets caught stealing, or whatever. Whichever village is found to have committed the crime forfeits their bond as reparations. At the end of the Exams you get back whatever of your bond is left."

"What if the host village just refuses to give the money back?" Noburi asked from his station, where he was de-feathering a chicken.

Mari-sensei laughed. "Then every single one of the villages comes down on them like a ton of bricks. Besides, no one wants to. Villages can promote anyone they want any time they want; the Exams are really just an excuse for the Kages, daimyos, powerful merchants, yakuza bosses, and whoever else to get together safely and make deals while checking each other out. Flagrantly breaking the rules means you don't get invited to the table next time."

Keiko frowned. "Does that not mean that the Exams are a pointless sham?"

Mari-sensei shook her head. "Oh, no. They're very important. On an individual level, even getting chosen for the Exams is a public statement that your village has real confidence in you, that they think you are among their best. Actually getting promoted at the Exams establishes your reputation. You'll get better missions, more responsibility, more trust from your superiors.

"On a larger scale, the performance of a village's genin establishes or confirms the reputation of that village. A large part of Leaf's reputation is because they have this habit of spitting out legendary ninja, but the rest of it is because they consistently kick ass at the Exams. A strike force can avoid one or two S-rank ninja, but if every single genin from the village is potentially a serious threat then you need to think very carefully before sending that strike force. Villages who do well in the exams get better trade deals and have more leverage in political negotiation. No, the Exams are the exact opposite of a sham."

"I see."

"What can we expect, specifically?" Hazō asked. "Tournament? Written exams? Poetry contests?"

"Heh. No, no poetry contests. Definitely a one-on-one tournament, usually as the last event. They'll define an arena, generally with some terrain inside it—rocks, a patch of trees, whatever—and you slug it out. As to the rest...probably three to five events, then a month-long break for training and partying, then the tournament. Exactly what the events are varies from year to year, but they're always oriented around testing ninja skills. Combat, stealth, espionage, kidnapping, assassination, and leadership are the primary focus. Keiko, that last one is something we'll need to brainstorm about. Some or all of the events will be team events, and it's not uncommon that for at least one of those you'll be assigned to lead a scratch team. Given that Mist knows the weaknesses of the Mori clan and knows that all of us have been adopted into Leaf, I would be surprised if they didn't spring that one on you."

Keiko looked like she was about to vomit. "I can't...."

Mari-sensei smiled comfortingly. "I know. We'll figure it out and find a way to help you. We're ninja; it's pretty much expected that we'll cheat like crazy."

"Speaking of cheating," Hazō said, "what about that 'no killing' rule? Should we expect people to try to cheat there?"

"No, that's the one thing that you can pretty much rely on. Also, you aren't allowed to cripple someone outside a fight. You threw a tag at them in the arena, they didn't dodge fast enough, and they got their hands blown off? Well, better to discover their incompetence now rather than when it would ruin a mission. You walked up to a downed opponent and cut his hands off? You're ejected from the Exams and your village pays a large fraction of their bond.

"At the same time, crippling an opponent means that you lacked the skill to take them down any other way. You obviously won't be useful for kidnapping missions and can't be trusted to capture enemy ninja for interrogation. It will pretty much sink your chances at promotion and it makes your village look bad, so you probably won't be chosen to go again in the future."

Hazō nodded thoughtfully. Keiko had been practicing non-lethal combat for months; she should be able to work around that limitation. Noburi's drain gave him an easy nonlethal takedown if there was water around. Even if there wasn't, he was good enough with his Whip that he could probably manage to just knock someone out in direct combat. This rule was going to require some serious prep for Hazō, though.

"I can make us lower-power explosives," he said. "Should be able to use them for nonlethal if we're careful. And the Goo Bombs and macerators will give us some options."

Keiko wasn't listening. "Lead a team...?" she whispered, eyes wide and staring.

"It's okay, Keiko," Mari-sensei said reassuringly. "I promise, we'll get you through it. Now, hurry up with those peppers, okay? The sauce is almost ready."

o-o-o-o​

The day was bright and sunny, if a bit chilly. Lunch had been delicious, and Hazō was lazing on the hillside at Training Ground Four, Keiko and Noburi stretched out beside him. Kagome-sensei and Mari-sensei were both off somewhere doing something or other and there was no real pressure right at the moment. For the last ten minutes he'd been debating which of his many potential courses of training would be the optimal one to work on next. Seal research? Training with the macerator rings that Kagome-sensei had given him? Perhaps tactical discussion with the rest of the team...?

Or maybe just lounging on the stubbly grass, enjoying the sun on his face, and taking a short nap. Yes, that sounded pretty good. He'd train later; the Exams were serious and he needed to treat them as such, but half an hour wouldn't make a difference.

He jerked upright, all traces of relaxation forgotten as Yamanaka Neira walked onto the field, her face set in the unreadable blank mask of the interrogator she was. Mari-sensei trailed a step behind her, looking equally serious.

"Good morning, children," Yamanaka said coldly, coming to a halt in front of them and slightly uphill. She settled gracefully down into a crosslegged position, hands resting on her knees as she eyed them like a bunch of bugs. "Your teacher has asked me to help you with psychological warfare preparation."

"What?" Noburi blurted.

"You guys will kick ass and take names at the Exams," Mari-sensei said, settling down beside them. "The fact that you're going to the Exams is partly because you're Jiraiya's clan and having you there is politically useful. The fact that you're going to be competing is because all three of you are incredible prodigies. You are the best students I have ever worked with, and it shows; all of you are significantly more powerful than anyone your age should be, you learn faster, and you work together better than most teams.

"That doesn't mean the Exams will be easy. Like I said last night, the Exams are mostly about politics and building reputation for the villages. Only the best are sent, so the raw caliber of opponent you face is going to be high, and most ninja spend three to six years as genin before being considered for promotion. You're going to be competing against kids years older than you. Even if they aren't as gifted, they will make up for it with sheer experience."

She laughed and tossed her head so that her hair, freshly brushed and shimmering sunset-red in the sun, bounced dismissively. "Having said all that, I still expect you to go through most of them like crap through a goose. The main thing I'm worried about is psychological warfare. The fact that we're from there means that your clans are going to be on the field. They'll know exactly what buttons to push to make you angry and shake your confidence. I've asked Neira to help us with this. She's going to play the red team; she'll be trash-talking each of you in turn, just the way your opponents will. The rest of us are going to be blue team, helping you sort through what she says and find the reasons why it's wrong. Being exposed to it now, in a safe environment with your team around you, will make it easier to handle in the moment. Okay?"

"Do all teams train like this?" Noburi asked, sounding sick.

"Only the ones who want to win."

"Noburi, if you wish to bow out of this training, you can," Yamanaka said. "No one would blame you and, honestly, it might be a good idea. If I may offer an honest assessment, you're unlikely to go far in the Exams. You're too fat to compete with taijutsu types like Hazō, so if anyone manages to close with you you'll be defeated instantly. Having watched you train I can confidently say that you aren't fast enough to keep up with people who have been more serious about their conditioning. Your skills with your Water Whip are good for your age but you're a one-trick pony. You are effective as part of your team since Keiko and Hazō can cover your weaknesses, but as an individual fighter you will not survive for long. You have no mobility techniques to allow you to evade area attacks effectively, Hōzuki's Mantle will not be sufficient protection against a competent Earth user, and, again, you are useless against a decent melee specialist."

"That is such crap," Hazō said. "Noburi, ignore her. She's full of shit." His stomach was somewhere down around his toes looking for an escape hatch and he was quietly swearing to himself in the name of the Sage that he would never, ever, ever again ask Mari-sensei for extra training. What was she thinking, bringing a Yamanaka in—and Yamanaka Neira at that? He could only hope that Noburi never found out that this had been Hazō's brilliant idea.

Noburi swallowed and straightened, looking back at Yamanaka defiantly. "Thanks, Hazō, but I've got this. I'm not going to let you get to me, lady."

"Good," Mari-sensei said. "Let's go over those one at a time. Noburi, you've been uncomfortable about your body as long as I've known you. Yes, you are a little heavier than most ninja your age, but you've blown it out of proportion in your mind. You're built stocky instead of wiry and you still have a little of your baby fat. You've traded a lot of that for muscle since we've been together—"

Noburi blinked. "I have?"

"Yes, you doofus!" Hazō snapped, rolling his eyes in exasperation. "Sage's beard, do you even know how a mirror works?"

Mari-sensei laughed. "Don't worry, you'll shed the rest of it over the next couple of years. Don't expect to end up skinny like Neji; you'll always be built like a brick, but soon enough it's going to be a very muscular brick. Jiraiya's like that too, except he's taller so it's not quite as obvious." She gave him a bawdy wink. "I'll also note that 'built like a brick' really works for a lot of girls.

"As to your skills, Neira's understating it. It's true that you have a limited selection of jutsu, but so do most genin. You're good enough with your Water Whip that you can generally handle single opponents and Hōzuki's Mantle protects you from being ganged up on. As to speed, well, those Goo Bomb seals that Jiraiya gave us will go a long way towards fixing that one. Doesn't matter how fast an opponent is if his feet are stuck to the ground."

"A fair counter," Yamanaka said, nodding to Mari-sensei. "Of course, I had not gotten to the primary reason he should drop out." She turned a merciless gaze on Noburi. "You are a coward."

"Excuse me?!"

"You are a coward," she repeated calmly. "It's not an issue during normal team operations, since your fear of being shamed in front of your teammates is usually stronger than your fear of conflict. Unfortunately for you, at some point you'll need to stand on your own two feet, and you'll crumple. I've seen a thousand genin like you, Noburi; you became a ninja because your family expected it, not because you had the Will of Fire burning inside you. You've drifted along since then, not working any harder than necessary. You haven't even chosen your own path as a ninja; most of your training has been whatever Hazō suggested. You wanted the leadership of the team because it would have stroked your ego, but Hazō pushed you into a beta male role almost without you knowing it was happening...and you find that you're comfortable there because in your secret heart you know that you don't have the intelligence and the steel for command. Part of the Exams will require you to lead others; it will be immediately obvious that you cannot.

"On a personal level, I've seen how you flinch away from feints when sparring with Hazō because you fear pain. I've also seen how you look nervous every time Keiko wants to spar with practice kunai. When she wants to work with Hazō his face is determined; he's smart enough to know that he's weak against ranged fighters and seeks to remedy that. You avoid it, preferring instead to make excuses about how you need to focus on your jutsu."

"Fuck you, lady," Noburi snarled. "Fuck you and the horse you rode in on. I'm not afraid of anything."

Neira offered him a mocking head-bow. "And yet you grow angry when I say it. People don't get angry at things they believe are false, boy." She paused, then nodded as a thought visibly occurred to her. "I will grant that it might not be entirely your fear of pain that makes you so reluctant to train with Keiko. I'm sure that part of it is fear of being beaten by the girl you still have that unrequited crush on." She smiled gently. "You really do need to let go of that, you know. As a bride of the Nara, she is destined for a better man than you."

Noburi glared at her silently.

"Hazō was correct earlier," Keiko said, the words filled with ice and steel. "You are full of shit. I have seen Noburi stand between two groups of enemy ninja without batting an eye and calm them down with a few words and a smile—twice, in fact. I have seen him doing surgery seconds after a brutal combat without a tremor in his fingers. I have seen him stand his ground before more chakra beasts than you've ever heard of, all without flinching. Furthermore, the idea that he has a crush on me is ludic—" She broke off as she caught a glimpse of Noburi's beet-red face.

...Clap...clap...clap, went Yamanaka's bony hands. "Very impressive, girl. You managed to completely miss the feelings of a boy you've been sharing a camp with for eighteen months. As to your defense of him...well, it's not much of one, is it? Chakra beasts aren't a real threat to a competent ninja, even if those ninja need to protect a bunch of genin. And I notice that you say he 'calmed those ninja down', not that he actually defeated them. I find it unlikely that pretty words will get him very far in the Chūnin exams." She waved airily. "But, fine, let's grant that he managed to talk down a few small-town hick ninja and somehow this will be useful. You, by contrast, stood your ground in front of the murderous Boss Summon of the Pangolins and forced him to change his mind about you. Hazō beat three ninja in hand-to-hand combat...although, granted, neither you nor Noburi saw that since those three had already defeated you without themselves being wounded. Tied you to a tree, I believe? Tell me, were you awake when they put their hands on you? When they lifted you and held you against the trunk so they could wind the ropes around you? Did they hold you by the arms or the shoulders?"

Keiko's breathing was fast and Hazō watched her swallow convulsively.

"Not that it matters," Yamanaka said. "If it would be smart for Noburi to drop out, it's absolutely essential for you. Noburi will probably wash out early and waste one of Leaf's slots, but there is an excellent chance that you will be actively harmful to our reputation. The essence of being a chūnin is the ability to lead, and you lack that to a degree even more profound than most Mori. Your sister didn't; based on her dossier she is sunny and intelligent, with charisma to spare. If she had been sent on that mission in your place things would be very different, but what we actually got was you."

She paused, frowning in thought. "Hm...Ami is only a little older than you, isn't she? Probably about chūnin age, actually. I wonder if you'll end up competing against her." She smiled sadly and shook her head. "That would be a bad fight. The latest intelligence reports say that she's both furious and disappointed in you for the way you betrayed your family. You really should drop out, Keiko. Wait until next year or the year after; Ami will have been promoted by then so you won't have to worry about seeing the look in her eyes as she comes at you across the field. Or face the humiliation of losing to someone who can do everything you can but better."

"That's enough, Neira," Mari-sensei said sharply. "Keiko, look at me."

Keiko was pale and shaking, silent tears running down her paralyzed face. She turned to Mari-sensei woodenly, all of her usual grace lost.

"Keiko, Neira is playing on your fears, and she is lying through her teeth," Mari-sensei said. "Leaf has no dossier on Ami, Neira is just guessing what's going to hurt you the most. I know Ami. I know Ami, and all of your cousins, and your parents. I studied them before we left Mist, because I wanted to know what sort of genin we were being assigned. Ami does not hate you. In fact, I will bet you twenty thousand ryo, which is all the money I happen to possess at the moment, that she has been loudly defending you ever since we left. I'm certain that she misses you and that she will be delighted to see you again. She'll call you 'runt' and make a joke about how it took you long enough to get back. If she's told in advance that you're coming then she'll probably have a bunch of candied sesame seeds in her pocket when you meet."

Keiko's eyes stayed locked on her teacher's face but she said nothing. She sniffled, her cheek quivering as she fought back sobs.

"Your parents will undoubtedly be there too," Mari-sensei said, rolling her eyes in amused disgust. "Probably just as stick-up-the-butt frigid as ever."

Noburi snorted. Keiko's stomach spasmed as a laugh ran into a sob and fought to the death. Her face cracked into a watery and uncertain smile.

"That's better," Mari-sensei said. "Yes, they'll be there, and yes, they'll be their usual cold and standoffish selves. But! They will be flummoxed. Baffled. Boggled, even. I bet they'll spend the entire Exams deep in the Mori Voice, desperately trying to figure out how they could possibly have been so earth-shatteringly stupid as to miss your potential. Judged worthy of a summoning scroll by Pantsā of the Adamant Scales? Adopted by a Sannin who is now the Hokage of Leaf? Their confidence will be shaken to the core at the profound depths of their error."

"They're right to be disappointed," Keiko said, her voice tiny. "All of those things just happened around me. I didn't really do anything except stand there."

"Oh, bosh, girl!" Yamanaka said disapprovingly. "Stop wallowing in self-pity! Honestly, how can you be so smart and insightful about everyone and everything else and so bloody stupid about yourself?"

"Hey!" Noburi said.

Yamanaka waved him to stillness. "Oh, be quiet. Honestly, girl, apply that magnificent brain of yours. How do you find the truth about a problem that you're emotionally invested in?"

Keiko blinked in surprise at the change of tone and topic. "You...set aside the emotions. Recognize that you are experiencing motivated cognition and make allowances for it. Simulate someone else and see how they would analyze the situation."

"Very good. Now, sit up straight and pay attention."

Keiko's spine straightened by pure reflex.

"The following exercise is a skills evaluation as part of your career development," Yamanaka said calmly. "You will listen to the following personnel jacket and provide an assessment.

"There is a genin kunoichi of Leaf who is being considered for promotion. She is young for the position of chūnin, but her sensei has recommended her in the strongest terms. Her case has been reviewed by senior Yamanaka officials to evaluate mental stability and loyalty. They are satisfied with the results. The Hokage has reviewed her case file and approved her assignment to the Exams.

"Despite her low rank and young age, this genin has more wilderness survival experience than most ninja twice her age. She is an accomplished ranged weapons user. She has made the effort to master non-lethal takedowns so she is useful for capture missions and is able to take prisoners. She mastered a difficult Wind-based mobility jutsu that significantly enhances her combat capabilities by allowing her to control range. At one point Jiraiya offered her an open-ended reward for some very good work she and her team had done; he was amazed when she had the self-awareness to simply ask what he thought would be best. He mentioned to me that this young lady was the first person, ever, to spend one of those rewards solely on his advice. Jiraiya is a hard man to impress, yet he was impressed by her wisdom.

"Finally, this young ninja possesses a bloodline that makes her frighteningly good at tactical analysis, yet even without it she is capable of keeping up in conversation with Nara Shikaku, not needing to ask questions or receive explanations. She has significant social discomfort, yet she has made friends in Leaf, although she may not be aware of that. Furthermore, she has inspired fierce loyalty in her team, to the extent that her squadmates find themselves mentally fondling the idea of murdering a mean old lady who criticized her. Please provide your evaluation of this kunoichi and an assessment of whether she is an appropriate candidate for the Chūnin exams."

"That's not...I'm not—"

"Bup!" A bony finger leaped into the air. "We are not talking about you right now, young lady. We are talking about a different Leaf kunoichi. If she happens to bear some passing similarity to you then that is merest coincidence. Now, continue."

Keiko paused. "She seems...adequately skilled, albeit narrowly focused. Ranged weapons, movement, and social awkwardness mean that she will not be useful for anything aside from combat missions. My inability to plan—"

"Ahem."

Keiko flinched. "She will not be useful for non-combat missions, and therefore it would be better to give the slot in the Exams to someone else, someone more well-rounded."

"Don't be ridiculous, girl. Do you know how many genin could qualify as 'well-rounded'? There's probably one or two, but I can't bring them to mind. Young ninja don't survive by being well-rounded, girl. They survive by being extremely good at one particular thing and trusting their Hokage not to use them for missions that they aren't qualified for. Well-roundedness is something that comes with experience, after you survive your first few dozen missions. Expecting someone a year or two out of the Academy to be even remotely well-rounded...well, you might as well expect the Sage of Six Paths to return and teach history at civilian school."

Yamanaka sat quietly, waiting in silence for Keiko to digest what she'd been told. After a moment, when it became clear that the girl was not going to speak, the old woman turned to Hazō.

"So," she said, a smile spreading across her face. "Kurosawa Hazō, now Gōketsu Hazō."

Hazō braced himself for what was coming.

"Of course, you were never really a Kurosawa, were you? 'By darkness unmoved'—isn't that the Kurosawa clan motto? Your clan holds the line, protecting civilization. Yes?"

"Yes...?"

"Your mother didn't live up to that motto," Yamanaka said bluntly. "She chose sex over the ideal of her ancestors. She couldn't be bothered to fulfill her responsibilities as clan heir, caring more for her own pleasures in the bed of a nobody who never even made jōnin before dying on a random, unimportant mission.

"Unfortunately, she seems to have inculcated that irresponsibility in you. You are clearly gifted, but erratic and unreliable. You have brilliant ideas and talk a good game about wanting to uplift the civilians, yet you clearly care more about looking smart and getting the credit than about making a difference. You've repeatedly boasted of how you can use your jutsu to build nice, safe walls for civilians; how many civilians have been protected by such walls? Have you ever actually done anything towards this uplift concept that you supposedly care about so much?"

"I built walls for the lake village in Iron," Hazō said.

"Oh, well done. Well done indeed. One village, over the course of a year and a half of wandering." She waved her hand dismissively as he opened his mouth to protest. "Yes, yes, you didn't have the jutsu the whole time. If you truly cared about protecting civilians then you could have built walls with an axe and a shovel. No, what you care about is the idea of saving people, because it allows you to think of yourself as heroic.

"That overinflated ego and lack of self-awareness is standard for teenage boys, although not usually as pronounced as it is in you. It's not entirely your fault; you are surrounded by people who stroke your ego by being impressed at your stated ideals, without ever demanding that you back it up by acting on those ideals.

"That irresponsibility shows in every aspect of your life. You have some ability to adapt existing seals, yet you recklessly work on things beyond your ability, never stopping to consider if your sensei—a paranoid hermit with no experience at teaching—is actually capable of offering valid assessments of your ability. You have torn holes in reality not once but twice, something that competent sealmasters usually manage to avoid.

"Of course, your fecklessness also reveals itself in your complete lack of concern over security. Your team has become so used to cleaning up your OPSEC messes that they don't even get angry anymore."

Hazō clamped down on his face and body, the Iron Nerve dictating that they show only the calm peace that they had displayed the first time he successfully meditated.

"Let's leave the OPSEC failures and the sloppy sealwork aside," Yamanaka said. "Let us instead review your history here in Leaf. One of the first things you did was to attack a jōnin in broad daylight, and leak the fact that the Iron Nerve allows for perfect reproduction of written materials. That, of course, leads the intelligent person to wonder if this reproduction ability applies to seals as well."

The Iron Nerve prevented Hazō from visibly wincing, but inside his entire body was trying to tie itself in knots.

"You then managed to threaten a Leaf doctor and insult one of the most powerful men in the world. Even better, you are too arrogant to understand what you had done, even after it was explained to you. From what Jiraiya has told me, Mari gave you a clear and explicit analysis of what you did wrong, yet you rejected it, refusing to accept that anything you said could be interpreted as a threat and asserting that it was everyone else's fault, not yours. Your apology was born of a desire not to be punished again instead of a real desire to improve.

"This fundamental lack of understanding and inability to model the world is endemic to your behavior. You come up with the idea for a major military invention—of course, you lack the ability to actually implement it, but I'm sure you believe that to be trivial. After all, you're an 'idea man', aren't you? Surely all that's required is to generate important concepts? There are others who can do all the hard work of turning your so-brilliant and revolutionary ideas into useful technology; the important part is that you get the credit. Oh, and it's vitally important that everyone listen to and immediately embrace your 'uplift' concept. Because obviously the world that has been built by generations of intelligent and hardworking people is fundamentally stupid." She chuckled. "I must say, it's adorable of you to think that your ideas are so novel and so important." She glanced over at the red-headed jōnin to Hazō's left. "You did a good job on his taijutsu training, Mari, but you really shouldn't have been so lax about basic socialization. I understand that you never had any desire to teach genin and just got stuck with them, but you still could have done a bit more. It's probably better for everyone that you've given up on teaching them, since now we can place them with some competent teachers. I'm sure that one of them can train Hazō in minimal social skills."

Fury snarled in Hazō's heart, more at the syrupy-sweet denigration of his teacher and his mother than of himself, but he allowed no trace of it to reach his body. He focused instead on his breathing, mentally stepping outside of his own head so that he could 'watch' himself breathe calmly and evenly.

Yamanaka eyed him for a moment, then nodded satisfaction. "Good," she said. "Surprisingly good, in fact. Based on your dossier I do not believe for a moment that you're able to maintain that level of calm on your own, so I suspect you're using your bloodline somehow. Which says interesting things about its capabilities, but we'll leave that for another day."

She looked around the circle. "You did well, each of you. Many genin can be goaded into actually attacking me. The three of you managed to confine yourself to a few curse words, and you defended each other even when I mentioned interpersonal challenges among you.

"The thing to take away from this lesson is that each of the things I said was a tiny kernel of truth wrapped in an enormous lie. Everyone has flaws—personally, I have a superiority complex and a desire for control which together result in difficulty forming long-term relationships." She half-smiled, the gesture tinged with self-mockery. "I'm working on it.

"Noburi, Mari was right in what she said: you are in fact a more than competent ninja and your physique is perfectly acceptable. Keiko, you are an intelligent and skilled young woman with a level of emotional maturity that is impressive in some areas but lacking in others due to your unwarranted self-hate. Hazō, you are frighteningly creative and have good leadership skills alongside your sealing and taijutsu. You do need to work on OPSEC, but I've seen worse."

She rose to her feet with an easy grace that belied her age. "I am certain that today's session was uncomfortable," she said calmly. "Nonetheless, I hope it will help when you face real enemies who know your secrets and really do want to hurt you. Personally, I'm confident that all of you will do fine." She bowed shallowly, the gesture of a clan elder offering acknowledgement to skilled clan children, then turned and walked away.

Hazō looked around the circle uneasily and found the others doing the same.

"Noburi," Keiko said hesitantly. "What she said about your feelings towards me...."

Noburi jumped up. "Hey, speaking of what she said, let's spar! After all, I need to work on dealing with ranged fighters!" He turned and practically ran down onto the field.

Keiko watched him go, her face utterly lost. Eventually she climbed to her feet and went to join him, practice kunai appearing in her hands as she moved.