《Reincarnated as a Grunt in the Demon Lord's Army》Book 5, Part 6

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Klarion was silent for a good deal longer than Len would have preferred. Pitch had been doing his little manipulations with her head lately which had made it easier for her to figure out how to get the screws into people. It was a strange experience, like having all the cheat codes and walkthroughs to a game but instead of knowing how to get past that particularly tricky boss, it was how to convince a given individual to throw away their own hopes and dreams and instead become your loyal servant for life. For the most part she'd been obstinately refusing to exploit that ability but she'd still gotten used to it being there.

With Klarion, she was drawing a big old blank. It might have been that she just didn't know the woman well enough to get a read, but it felt like there was more to it than that. This woman was just better at keeping her true desires in check. For all that that was exactly what Len would have preferred from all her interactions: not knowing the magic words to win, it was unsettling here. Not that she could do anything about it.

"I'm not going to take you at your word, Lenore Wraithwhisper, but I will look into this matter. For the moment, I won't push you any further to return my father. If what you say about him is true I'll run him through myself, but it will take me time to be certain."

"Take all the time you need," Len said pleasantly. "You have one day."

"One day?!?"

"I didn't stutter. That should be more than enough time to get your answers and if it's not, well, you're not very good at your job, are you?"

"You are insufferable."

"That's been mentioned to me on occasion, yes. Doesn't change a damn thing, though. I think I've given your lot ample leeway so far. You have the ability to cause me a fair amount of heartburn if you want but I have the ability to end the lot of you. I really think that it's about time you recognized that and stopped playing coy. We're stronger together and I really would prefer to have your support. Please don't make me do the things I'd need to do to be rid of you."

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"You think you can just strongarm your way to victory here? Do you fancy yourself a tyrant?"

"Not really, but I'm certainly coming around to their way of thinking. It's all a lot quicker, isn't it? Just see a problem, kill the problem. Got a new problem? Kill that too. Not really the sort of story that leaves one with many friends at the end of the day but when the choice is between that and absolute destruction I'm gonna go with door number one."

"No matter who you have to crush in the process?"

"Well, I wouldn't go that far, but that doesn't mean that there aren't a lot that I'm perfectly happy stepping over. The neat thing is that you get to decide which side of that line you want to be on. I'd suggest you choose carefully."

"Maybe I should cut you down right now if you're that dead set on using force to get what you want."

"That's precious, really, but I really doubt you'd have a chance in hell of that. I've got some pretty solid backing that you don't want to come across."

Len was starting to get irritated. She didn't expect instant capitulation but Klarion was drawing this out a good deal more than was needed. Couldn't she see that this was her only lifeline? Len hated the idea of having to initiate a full purge. It went against everything she was trying to build and would hurt their readiness besides, but if she couldn't win this woman over, there weren't a lot of options that didn't end in violence. It didn't help that they were both stubborn creatures who rose to the other's baited words.

The ordinary testiness was more than enough to have her ready to tear the woman's throat out. Every damn threat seemed to wash off of her while she kept making her own. She was just short of being outright unreasonable and yet she still set Len's teeth on edge. She wanted to... with a sigh, Len got her emotions in check. She didn't have to play nice with Klarion, exactly, but needlessly antagonizing her wouldn't get them anywhere.

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"You have the day, use it as you see fit but that's my deadline. I don't have time to keep this task up in the air very long. Decide whether you want to have a life here or not. If you do, I will be happy to discuss things further. If you don't, well, we can explore that option too."

"Very well. Will that be all, Head?" the stiff formality was almost quaint given that the woman had been willing to threaten cutting Len down a few minutes prior.

"That will be all. Oh, and I shouldn't have to remind you that any Banished are to be treated with the proper respect afforded any citizen of this city, clear?"

"Clear," Klarion growled, leaving without saying another word.

Len sank into her chair as soon as she left.

"Jesus, that was more trouble than it was worth."

"I have a suggestion," Cammie chimed in.

"I'm sure you do. No, we're not doing it."

"Aww... but you haven't even heard it yet!"

"You want me to unleash you to exterminate the lot of them in a bloody assault that leaves no question in anyone's mind what the consequences of crossing me are. You want to dance in the streets as blood rains down from on high all while fully embracing the giddy little psychotic schoolgirl motif that you've got going on. Did I miss anything?"

"Oh, Lenore, you understand me so well," the giddy approximation of adoration was the most unsettling thing the girl had ever inflicted on Len and she recoiled. That drew a peal of merry laughter from the sprite and Len realized she'd lost that round.

"Ugh, you're exhausting."

"You know you love it."

"That's a very strong word. Tolerate is a fair bit kinder than you deserve here as well but I suppose we'll have to leave it at that for now."

"So, if you're not going to let me do things my way, what are you going to do?"

"Honestly, probably just leave them to it for the day. It's only fair that I let her investigate things for herself. I did just accuse her dad of being the worst sort of bastard when she seemed to have assumed that he was just your run of the mill bastard. That takes some time to process."

"But that's so booooring. Can't I kill just a few of them. You know, to keep them in line?"

"Not yet, you can't. Have no fear, if the time ever comes when I need you to go all Lollipop Chainsaw on a pack of scumbags, I'll let you know."

"What in the world are you- ooooh! I like her! show me more."

"Sure, if we ever get back to Earth I'll let you give it a shot. Depressingly, it's not nearly as great as it sounds. Still fun enough, though."

"Your world is very weird, Len."

"Says the talking embodiment of shadow and chaos that's decided to shack up inside my head."

"Didn't give me much choice on that one."

"Point. Anyway, keep an eye on her. No violence, no creepy haunting or whatever it is you can do to her without my direct consent. Just leave her be unless you catch her outright planning to fuck me over."

"Then can I kill her?"

"No, then you can inform me of it and I can deal with it. Do we have an understanding?"

"Yes, Mom," Cammie offered a long-suffering sigh. "You really are no fun at all."

"That's bullshit. I was voted life of the party at all of the office gatherings."

"No, you were ignored by most of your coworkers and at best got passive-aggressive one-liners. I'm in your head, you can't trip me up with weak lies like thta."

"Oh shut up and go you damn gremlin."

Cammie faded away without any final snipe. With that out of the way, Len set to work on her favorite pastime these days: paperwork.

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