A groan leaves my mouth as I feel myself wake up. My muscles feel stiff and my entire left arm hurts.

My arm feels heavy, I feel like someone placed something on it. I feel like I'm in the hospital again, and I really hope I'm wrong.

I've been in the hospital a few times in the past, and even though it's like my second home, it will never be one of my favorite places.

I force my eyes open, my vision blurry at first. I look at the ceiling, breathing in relief when I recognize the familiar black ceiling that is in my room.

I close my eyes, mentally counting to three before opening them again.

My vision becomes clear, which makes me feel a little bit happy. I'm glad the windows are closed, because I'm not a big fan of sunlight.

Blinking my eyes, I stare at the ceiling till I master the courage to sit up. My body feels weak, I feel like an elephant sat on it.

Nevertheless, I force myself to sit up straight, growling in pain when I mistakenly touch my hand, which I notice has an IV.

'Hunter must have placed it on me.' I think to myself, remembering everything that happened yesterday.

I remember leaving the office, rushing here with urgency. I also remember taking several sleeping pills, which immediately knocked me out.

Though, I don't know if I imagined what happened next.

I could feel Hunter's presence after I fell down, and I also remember hearing his cries as I was been lifted from the floor.

I'm a very conscious person, and even when I'm in severe pain, I'll know everything that will be happening around me.

My eyes close as I lift my hand up, gently massaging my eyelids. My eyes still hurt, and I'm sure it's because of being unconscious for too long.

I can't remember the last time I slept without turning and tossing. I always wake up in the middle of the night, forcing myself to go back to sleep-- which doesn't always work.

Sleeping for me is a task that I fail to fulfil. My body is usually tired, but it's like my eyes can't co-operate with the rest of my body.

Sighing, I open my eyes again, not getting surprised when I see Hunter standing a few feet away from the bed, his arms folded on his chest as he stares at me with emotions I can't seem to read nor understand.

"What are you looking at?" I question, my back relaxing against the soft headboard.

"What do you think I'm looking at?" He replies with a question of his own, the tone of his voice annoying me.

He sounds angry, and even though I know the cause of his anger, I won't tolerate him making noise.

I'm sensitive to noise, and he knows this. Hunter usually sounds like he's shouting when he's angry, and he knows that he has to control himself when he's near me.

Not because I'm his boss, but because I'll grow angry as well. I can't control my emotions, and anyone raising their voice at me just makes me snap.

"Talk softly; you're giving me a headache," I massage my forehead, my heartbeat beginning to rise.

"How do you expect me to speak softly when I almost lost you? Again?!" Hunter raises his voice, making me close my eyes with annoyance.

"Don't yell at me." I say through clenched teeth, trying to control my breathing.

"You've been out for two whole days, Diego... I just have to raise my voice!" Hunter confesses, surprising me.

Two days? Hunter must be joking with me.

I've never been out for two days. I always wake up a few hours after failing with my plan. "Why are you doing this to yourself?" He questions, his voice beginning to crack.

My mouth opens, ready to reply to him. But my brain fails to form a proper sentences.

Why do I do this to myself? Is it because of the hardships I passed through? Is it because of the abuse that was inflicted on me?

Is it because I'm weak?

I've heard people say that I'm strong. A few people know my story, and they all say that I'm strong.

But I know that I'm far from that.

I'm not strong... I'm a survivor.

I've learnt to survive through my pain. I've learnt to act like it's none existence; resulting to cutting myself when things become overwhelming.

Cutting myself is something that gives me peace. The pain that I feel makes me feel at ease. It makes me feel better, because I'm the one giving myself scars.

"You're hurting me and everyone that cares about you, Diego... I can't even sleep without fearing that you'll do shit to yourself when I turn my back." Hunter confesses, sitting down on the bed. "When will it come to an end, Brother? When are you going to be free from your demons?" Hunter asks, making me close my eyes as my heart clenches in pain.

It pains me to see Hunter like this. And it hurts me more when I realize that I'm the cause of his pain.

Hunter doesn't deserve to cry for me. No one should shed a tear for me.

I'm just a worthless bastard, that was born from people that hate him.

My own parents told me that I was a mistake. A mistake they were forced to live with.

"Answer me, Diego? When will it all come to an end?" He repeats in a whisper, looking at me with teary eyes.

I really want to tell him that everything will be alright. I want to tell him that everything will come to pass.

But I can't do any of that, because I know that I'm the problem. I know that I'm the cause of his pain.

My head feels hot as I begin to remember things that happened a long time ago. My heart begins to clench as I stare at him, hoping he sees the pain in my eyes.

I feel pressured to answer him.

I feel like a failure. I feel like I bring pain to everyone that gets close to me.

I feel like the Devil's child, just like my parents said.

I feel like I destroy everything and anything that comes my way.

"Don't be quiet, Diego... Answer me," Hunter pleads, a tear rolling down his cheek. "I need to know when you'll be better... I need to know when I'll get my brother back,"

His words replay in my head like a broken record. I feel like my head is about to explode. I feel angry as my chest heaves up and down, my heart beginning to beat rapidly.

My mouth opens without my permission, words that I can't comprehend escaping from it.

"It won't get better!" I yell, my voice echoing in the silent room.

Hunter looks startled to hear my loud voice, but that doesn't stop me from speaking my truth.

He wanted an answer, and I'll make sure he gets one.

"My fucking life is a mess! I feel like I'm dying whenever I wake up! I feel like I'm slipping in a dark hole every single day... Hunter, people are thankful to wake up: but I don't want to be here anymore. I want my pain to go away. I want to feel normal." I place a hand to my chest, hoping to calm myself-- which doesn't seem to work.

"I want to get better, Brother... I want to be happy. I want the pain to go away! I want it to stop... When will it fucking stop?!" I yell, laying down on the bed, the physical pain I felt a few minutes ago long forgotten.

"Diego, please relax." Hunter says, worry clear in his voice.

I can feel him near me, but it feels like he's a distance away. I feel alone.

"I can't relax! It fucking hurts! It's getting worse; the pain is getting worse... I want it to go away," I can feel the tears in my eyes, but they don't want to be let out.

I want to cry. I want to express my pain, but I don't know how to do so.

Hunter's voice is in the background, but I can't comprehend what he is saying.

My body feels so tired. I feel like my mind is about to explode. I feel like I'm dying.

Different thoughts are passing through my head, and they want to hurt me... Like they always do.

I can feel footsteps coming towards me, which is followed by a prick to my arm. My mind begins to get foggy, which is followed by my eyes closing.

I begin to slip into darkness as my heart begins to steady, Hunter's painful voice being the last thing I hear.

"Sleep, my brother... Rest for a while." I hear before my whole body shuts down.