On a distant battlefield a figure walks through the attacking forces. He’s clad in a hood with his hands in a pouch on the front of his garment. Mala beads hang around his neck as the very hint of green reflects from the eyes under the hood. Every combatant tries to engage him before a look of terror on their faces forces them to turn away. Suddenly a figure with a glowing sledgehammer with a short handle held in one hand lands in front of him. He stood about six feet and four inches; the new challenger wore full plate mail with a tunic draping between his legs. On that tunic was the holy symbol of Mantarok, a spear through a war horn. A ghostly spirit appears before him and is struck down by the hammer forcing the hooded figure to remove his hands from the pouch. Sharp green claws are revealed with scales running in a diamond pattern over the hands. The light from the hammer pulses and seems to draw energy in around it in concentric circles. All other combatants flee giving the two plenty of room. Furious blows were exchanged and the hooded fighter dashes around behind the warrior in full plate, but he was waiting for that. The hammer swings in an arc to his left coming up under the chin of the hooded man lifting him clean off his feet. Several teeth are spat out with a gout of green viscous blood. When he comes to his senses, he looks up just in time to see the glow of the hammer usher him into the next world.

The Paladin roared in triumph as he stands over the now motionless body. He doesn’t notice the fighting around him has stopped. All the attackers and defenders turn toward him and shimmer. Once their forms are revealed he realizes his error. He is now surrounded by a sore of men in hoods with Mala beads around their necks. Eyes glowing green from under the hoods.

“Stop!” Came a voice high above the Paladin. He looked up to see where it came from. Above him was a man with long white dreadlocks that reached down between his shoulder blades. His robes were disheveled heather grey and charcoal colored. Several of his limbs appear to be wrapped in bandages that writhed around him. He was seated on a golden throne with a round back. Directly behind the chair were ten open portals to various realms slowly rotating. In each of the portals he could see rows and rows of soldiers. Not just any soldiers, but representations of each of the ten hells. In the green portal stood countless columns of ghostly soldiers, in the red and blue portal stood an array of infernal demons and devils. Each one had an army waiting to pour fourth except the last. The last one was pure darkness. So much so it drank in the light around it. The paladin raised his weapon in defiance prepared to go down fighting.

“That won’t be necessary. I could use someone like you.” He said as the bizarre tableau faded away.

“Master Deacon, you need to wake up.” Alfred said standing above Deacons bed. He shot out of bed in a disjointed mass of limbs and fell flat on his face. He got a hold of himself and stared up at Alfred from the ground.

“Master Deacon, the others are waiting for you downstairs, and the Minister of the Interior has been banging on the door for five whole minutes. I was unable to wake you while you were having fits in your dreams.” Alfred said with a genuine look of concern on his face.

“I…uh…alright. Tell them I’ll be right down. Have you figured out hot water showers yet?” Deacon asked getting to his feet.

“The images in your mind of indoor plumbing are vivid. I will need a water source. Perhaps Tantus can get me access to the water plane. Our only other option is for me to figure out how to replicate water. Would you like me to begin the research?” Alfred asked.

“Oh please do. What about wine?” Deacon asked.

“I’m familiar but you don’t seem like a drinker to me, sir.” Alfred commented.

“I’m not but I’ve got something in the works, and it would help if you could replicate that too.” Deacon said as he pulled his boots on.

“Care to elaborate, sir?” Alfred asked.

“Keeping this one close to the vest, I’m afraid. I’ll check back with you when we get to the capital.” Deacon said rising and rushing down the stairs waiving everyone into the center of the room before collapsing Alfred. He placed his dungeon cube into the bag and quickly went over to the door. He waited just a heartbeat before swinging the door open wide. Pentecost nearly fell into the room but was saved at the last minute by Wotan grabbing his belt with one hand. Deacon’s eyebrow shot up as Wotan effortlessly held the Minister in place with that arm never breaking eye contact with Deacon. This reaffirmed his belief that he needs to be cautious around this one.

“What in the ten hells took so long?!” Yelled Lord Pentecost righting himself.

“I’m a pretty heavy sleeper. Breakfast?” Deacon asked.

“You missed that an hour ago. We need to go, now. Wait, you were all in here? Didn’t you hear me knocking?” Asked Pentecost his fury rising.

“Can’t hear anything with these squeaky floors and walls. I feel sorry for the people that have to live here.” Deacon said as he pushed past the Minister into the hallway allowing everyone else to leave as well. Lord Pentecost raised a finger but ended up choking on his own rage rather than spouting invectives.

They all found themselves out in the courtyard boarding their respective carriages as the daybreak turned to early morning. They began to waive goodbye to the gathered people as Earl Tirebrook appeared with a heavy pack on his back. He stepped up to the carriage door and wrapped on it sharply. Deacon opened it up.

“Sorry to drop this on you but I thought I might have run into you at the morning meal. With no stonework here anymore there is very little work for me. Would it be alright if I traveled with your train back to the capital?” Earl asked.

“Fine by me. It’s not my carriage procession though.” Deacon explained.

“Hardly, you have the Minister of the Interior and a contingent of Knights and Deep Dwellers escorting you to the Capital. How is it not yours?” Earl said scoring a point on Deacon in a game he didn’t even know he was playing.

“Fuck, you’re right.” He said slapping his forehead.

“Thanks. I won’t be any trouble. I see some room back with the Dwellers. I’d also like to pick their brains about rare stone materials I’ve heard about. Thanks again.” Earl said as he turned and headed further down the line.

“Well, that was a surprise.” Tantus said.

“You need to be more careful with your cube. Has one of us been dumb enough to open the door the Pentecost could have found out.” Typhus scolded.

“Why were you still asleep anyway?” Ralph asked.

“I had the most bizarre dream. I’m pretty sure it was a dream. Doesn’t matter. How far from the Capital are we now?” Deacon asked.

“Another four days hard travel or six at a leisurely pace. We can cut off two days if we take the Clearfog shortcut, but Pentecost doesn’t want to do that.” Typhus answered.

“Stupid feuds amongst the Nobility. Everyone else suffers because of it.” Amanda chimed in while reseating her weapons.

“Water.” Deacon said to Tantus.

“Excuse me?”’ Tantus responded.

“I need you to work with Alfred on water solution. Back home we had indoor plumbing. It ran hot water through piping and took waste from the house.” Deacon explained.

“We know what plumbing is, you ass. The gnomes invented it long ago. It’s just expensive so only high nobility and House Jinkbons at the shattered teeth really uses it. They are another family on the stone council by the way.” Spoke Typhus.

“Oh so it’s a luxury item. Yea well we need it in the cube. I’m not used to being this dirty for this long.” Deacon said as the carriage began to bounce and jostled it way down the side road back to the King’s Road.

“Had you got up earlier you could have bathed like the rest of us at the bath house.” Ralph said under his breath.

“What was that? Mr., I have a secret quest from a god.” Deacon said looking right at him.

Deacon took the next few hours to focus on his breathing technique. He needed to increase it’s effectiveness. Also it was one of the last thing Zageracks mentioned to him before going into hibernation. The least he could do for saving his life was a little training. He brought up the abilities description to check his progress.

Ability Name

Level

Progress

Description

Zageracks Breathing Technique

3

60%

This ability allows for the conversion of souls into energy within your body. Souls will be drawn to you passively at a slow rate. If you meditate and concentrate on your breathing, you can absorb souls more quickly. Soul energy can be used for various special attacks, these attacks will all count as Holy damage.

“Not bad” Deacon thought. He was almost at level four in the technique. Deciding to ask the more experienced Typhus about ways to improve the ability, he just launched into the question.

“Hey Typhus, how do you improve on an ability you are trying to train?” Deacon asked.

“Well typically you use it often. If you are trying to level it, you’ll build your training around it. Let’s say you want to increase your hack and slash fighting technique. You spend days at a time with a training dummy until you reach a plateau, and you no longer see any increases. Then you find a sparring partner switching up how you use it. That usually sees more gains. Real masters only have two or three abilities at level ten or so. Those are real terrors on the battlefield. They are usually surrounded by people who have mastered other things as well. You see, when you spend so much of your time on one thing you lose effectiveness with anything else. That will leave you vulnerable. This is why the Adventurer’s guild teaches party tactics. Their strengths, cover your weaknesses.” Typhus said pointing at Deacon’s party members.

“Why? What ability are you trying to grow?” Ralph asked curious. Deacon went on to explain what the technique did for him.

“That seems fundamental. I can use meditation to increase my mana regeneration, but I’d have to do it for days at a time to see any significant increase and that’s just a skill. Usually easier to train up. Abilities are typically harder. Also once you reach level five in either a skill or ability there is a chance it will evolve depending on how you’ve used it.” Tantus said.

“Why am I just hearing all this now?” Deacon asked.

“Because you’re a walking confluence of events. You don’t really stay anywhere for any length of time unless you are badly injured.” Amanda scoffed.

“Well I guess that good mood you were in has soured.” Deacon said.

“She’s not wrong. You may want to take a serious break for training once we are done with the Deacon Disaster Parade.” Ralph said clapping his hand over his mouth after the last part.

“Ha Ha, I knew you couldn’t stop saying it.” Typhus laughed boisterously while everyone else snickered.

“Are you guys calling this trip the Deacon Disaster Parade?” Deacon asked scowling at everyone in the carriage. They all just continued to laugh.