"...." he doesn't love me.

I stared at his eyes, so splendid a color of blueish green. The golden rays of the afternoon peeked into the very sophisticated brown office room with bookshelves adorned on the wall filled with books. There was ladders that helped people reach the book far to the top. And in front of the window, bathed in the golden afternoon-near evening light of the sun his desk stood. He sat in his intricately designed chair, leaning over to his desk filling out paper work with his black ink pen. His desk was piled with paper and stamps and an ink bottle. He had a picture frame of his late wife faced in front of him as he worked. "....."

There's an air of loneliness harbored in this endless silence of his scratching of ink and his sighs. "....." dust particles danced swiftly in the rays of light as I moved through the room. "....." Father. You don't love me. "......"

I can't tell, because I'm not the daughter you raised with love or compassion. I'm not the daughter you wholeheartedly accepted. Because for most of this life that I've lived, you've never been my father. But even so, I wished for you. I was jealous.

I was jealous that she got this wonderful father that loved her so much, while I got a condescending guardian that only took me in for money. I was jealous someone as bratty and stupid as her was so lucky to get a wonderful father like him! "It's not fair!" I wanted, I wished, I pleaded, for a parent that could love me. But even after I was announced to be your long lost daughter, and you smiled and treated me well. .... "....."

Your eyes. Will never love me like Madeleine. Madeleine, Who is exiled now. Why couldn't you take father's love for you with you, wherever you are? Madeline, did you have to leave your presence here...when you left? Why couldn't you just disappear and never come back to anyone? Why....doesn't the person who's supposed to love me....love me?

(Chapter 31 [last chapter] of the adapted novel version of the hit otome game Lilac Lovers')

"What a selfish person." is what I thought when I first read this chapter.

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