Ruelle - Bad Dream

I woke up to three pairs of eyes curiously staring at me, four if I counted Ember's wide ones that were just barely peering at me, peeking out from behind Ailech's shoulders. I smiled up at them awkwardly, feeling a little like an animal in a zoo.

"What?"

In my mind I was in my room. I thought I had just woken up and having so many people surrounding me, staring at me so early in the morning seemed more than a little strange. Then I looked around, took in the room, the padded bench under me, the shelves along the walls, the books, so many books, the window next to me.

Slowly my mind cleared. My room didn't have a bench. I wasn't in my room. I was in Abby's office. I tried to think back, tried to remember falling asleep, or why I might be in the old wizard's room, with Ailech and Ember and Cordelia...then the memory crashed over me and I held my breath, fearful that the pain would come back now that I had remembered it, but it didn't. I sat up, glancing around at the shocked faces.

"What?" I repeated, a little more forcefully.

"Good morning," Ailech said with a smirk, though it looked more relieved than mischievous. "You gave us a little scare, pulling a stunt like that."

"I didn't mean to take all of it," I mumbled. "Just the edge off, that's all."

"Well, you failed pretty miserably."

Ailech now sounded like he was reprimanding me. I shot him a glare.

"It isn't something I've practiced at length."

My words hissed out now, embarrassment mixing with defense of what I had done. Abby was watching me with his watery eyes, and I could see tear stains on Cordelia's pale cheeks as well. I gave her a small smile. It hadn't been her fault, though I knew she would think of it that way.

"Sorry for botching the trial."

She gave a hesitant, slow nod before sweeping from the room. That's when I noticed James' absence. I scowled. Of course he wouldn't be there, he wouldn't care. He would probably tell me I was stupid, irrational, for helping him, just like he had the last time. He'd say he didn't need it and that I was pathetic for not being able to control myself. My scowl darkened as I stood.

"I'm tired. I'm going to rest before Parish and Prey or the session will be useless."

Abby looked like he wanted very much to say something, but instead he closed his mouth and nodded, his eyes looking sad. Ailech escorted me to my room clucking at me the entire time like a mother hen. When I finally got him to leave I collapsed into bed, staring at the ceiling and wondering why I had been so foolish. I laughed bitterly as I remembered that I had wanted to know what James was feeling, what level Cordelia was giving him. Well, now I knew. My curiosity seemed stupid now.

Close to a half hour after I got to my room I knew I was pushing it. The brother's would be at the gym soon and I shouldn't keep them waiting for me like some kind of prima donna, but making myself leave my soft, warm bed was almost impossible. My muscles were so sore, my eyes so heavy. Ailech would knock soon anyway, thinking he had to wake me for my practice. A cat nap couldn't hurt.

I was in a room similar to my own, the same colors, same furnishings, but I slowly began to realize small discrepancies like a children's riddle book where you had to find little differences between two pictures side-by-side. My dirty clothes weren't crumpled on the floor. My clean clothes weren't haphazardly hanging on the back of the sole chair in the room's corner. My knives weren't carefully lined up on my bedside table, shining like jewelry. My crossbow wasn't hanging on the steel hook on the wall where I had left it. My small bag of belongings wasn't at the foot of my bed, always half-packed, in case I ever needed to leave in a hurry. Instead, the room was bare of almost anything. A sole, thin black book sat on the bedside table where my knives should have been, two white t-shirts neatly folded on the chair in the corner, a pair of dark denim hanging over one arm, folded lengthwise cleanly.

Then I saw a small movement through the crack of the bathroom door, just a flash of it, like someone had crossed the opening quickly. I heard a wretch and I knew where I was; in James' room. I wished I could wake up, wished it was just a dream, but I knew I was really there, not physically, but in some other way.

I cursed my vision as I walked toward the bathroom. I only made it five steps across the room before the door opened and James stumbled out, his hand gripping the door's handle as if it was the only thing holding him up. He made his way unevenly past me, clearly unable to sense me, or see me, and fell into his bed, coughing into a pillow, which came away red. I heard him swear under his breath, a word that sounded harsh and unfamiliar on his lips. I had rarely heard him curse, at least not in the present, only in Jevin's memories of James' past and I found I didn't like the sound coming from my Pair. It didn't suit him.

What suited him were calm and controlled words, calculated words that made others respect him, fear him, understand just how powerful he was. But more so than his profanity, than the red staining his pillow more and more, I hated seeing how his entire body convulsed with each cough, like each one might shatter him, like every breath tore through his skinny frame. I wished I could wake up.

I sat on the edge of his bed, knowing he wouldn't feel me there. For a moment I held my breath as he looked up, in my direction, and I wondered what he thought was there, surely not me, surely he couldn't see me in a vision. But then his eyes moved past where I sat, through me, to the far right wall of the room. He stared there for a few seconds, his face looking tired, run down, before he tossed the soiled pillow to the floor, wiped the back of his hand across his nose and burying his face in his bedspread, only the occasional small cough coming from him now.

Slowly he curled into himself, his arms wrapped around his stomach and I hated how it reminded me of when he had been injured by the Serpentine, how he had hugged his middle in the cab, or sitting on the curb, even when he'd walked with me.

A sharp knock came from the real world, and I had never been so happy for an alarm. I opened my eyes to find myself curled in my own bed, clutching a pillow to my chest like it was a lifesaving buoy in a stormy sea. I threw it at the door before realizing the knock was still unanswered.

"I know, Ailech. I'll be right out. I'm up."

I felt as sore as if I had already had my lesson with the brother's but I had become accustomed to the stiffness my body always held after meeting with Cordelia. Her Gift couldn't give physical injury, but having my body tensed, having each muscle pull at itself for so long during her trials always made me feel like I had taken an hour and a half beating by the time she was finished. I stretched gingerly as I opened the door.

James stood before me, looking nothing like he had in my dream. He was still too thin and looked sickly to me, I knew that would stay the same, but he didn't look like he was about to double over in pain, or get sick on my floor. His eyes didn't look weary anymore, just dead and empty, like nothing, like dull blue stones.

"You're joining for Parish and Prey? Seems like that might throw off their advantage, they are more of the two-on-one type."

I was thankful my voice came out so evenly.

"You aren't practicing with them anymore. Abraham thinks it makes more sense for us to spar together instead. We'll be taking over their time slot."

I felt a little betrayed that Abby hadn't told me himself, followed by a flash of jealousy that James seemed to be in better communication with the wizard than I was, despite me being at the Vault weeks longer. Though I guess they had known each other for years longer. I scowled before brushing past him, hating how every little thing he did annoyed me so much. Part of me knew I was just frustrated with myself, my emotions weren't making sense and I hated having no idea how I actually felt, what was going on in my own mind. My scowl deepened as I knocked on Ailech's door across from mine.

"Meet me in the gym. You'll have a busy night." I called through the wood before turning back to James.

His eyes stared out vacantly at me and I fought the urge to let out a sigh, or punch him.

"Lead the way."

Five minutes later I was in the familiar gym. I scowled deeper as I walked to the center of the floor, missing the brothers already. When I turned, James' eyes were already black.

"No warm up?" I asked derisively.

"Only if you need one, princess."

I bit back the comment I wanted to say and instead silently hurled every dirty word I could think of at my Pair. He stood ten feet away looking casual, or as casual as a Half could look Shifted, his muscles relaxed, his body loose. His lip quirked up as I mentally screamed a particularly colorful phrase at him as if he had heard me.

"Someone's in a bad mood," He said with mocking concern.

I sneered at him, refusing my Shift to jump from me just yet as I answered.

"I had a bad day."

"So I heard."

There was nothing in his voice, even with his Shift, and the result made my spine prickle, like half a shiver. I hated it and my already bad mood sank a level lower.

"Yeah, thanks for sticking around, making sure your partner was okay, really builds up the trust, you know?"

He looked like he was deciding whether to smile or sneer, instead he shrugged.

"You shouldn't trust me. And you shouldn't have been so foolish, but I knew you'd be fine. And if not, me standing over you wouldn't have helped anyway."

"Great outlook on life."

At that he gave a mean smile and mocking little bow, his pointed teeth glistening.

"What can I say, I was raised ever the optimist."

I suddenly wanted nothing more than to knock him backwards, pummel him on the gym's wooden floor and stomp down on his arrogant, stupid face. He looked up and smiled as if he had heard my thoughts, felt my very desires, again.

"Now are you ready? Was that enough foreplay for you or should I bring up Chi again? Maybe Syn? Jevin? Juda? Let me know when I'm getting warm-"

I hurled a sharp bolt of air at him, just to make him shut up. It clipped his shoulder, even with his quick twitch away, and I saw red immediately.

"That smarted," He said with a devious smile.

Almost too quick for me to follow he was in front of me. I let my Shift cover me as I jumped back. I had to throw up my arms in a hasty block as two blows came at me in a whirlwind. I missed one shot and tensed for the blow to my abdomen when the door opened and the brothers walked in. I smiled despite myself and dropped my arms. James turned to see whatever I was smirking at and dropped his to his side too. I pushed past him a little more roughly than was necessary to walk toward my previous tutors.

"You're cheating on us! I knew it! Preydon here didn't want to believe me, thought we were your one and onlys, but I know a two-timer when I see her, or a three-timer I guess...but I do like what I see."

He winked, as usual, and gave me a joking up-down. I just smiled as I walked over. Their words didn't elicit anything from me anymore.

"Abby thinks J-, he thinks I should practice with him instead. It wasn't my choice, trust me boys, I much prefer you."

I winked back as I passed them, making them both turn and watch me as I'd grown accustomed to. They were so easy to predict, outside of combat at least.

"You guys are only human, after all. So it had to end eventually, oil and water, you know how it is."

I spared a look back over my shoulder, seeing their eyes rise to mine a little late. I smirked again, running my tongue over my lips. Prey spoke next, his hands behind his head in the typical masculine pose, as if he was lounging on an invisible couch, not standing between two Shifted Halflings in the underground gym of a Mage safe haven.

"Am I the oil in this scenario? Does that mean I get to be on top? I mean, you can be the oil if you want, I'm really not that picky."

I heard James snort from behind me, but I ignored it, and him, completely.

"Are you guys just here to watch then?"

They nodded as they took up posts against the wall, leering as usual and making it fairly obvious they weren't that interested in the actual point of the lesson. A staged cough came from James' direction and I turned back to him leisurely.

"Can we continue or are you not done teasing yet?"

"Teasing? I'm shocked you don't think I have the follow through. Surely you don't think it's been all work and no play for me here all these weeks?"

I clucked my tongue at him as I gave a suggestive look. The brothers snickered from the corner perfectly on cue and I saw James' jaw tighten as if he was embarrassed by what I'd said.

"I'm very glad you've enjoyed your stay, though not that much I suppose. Like you said, they're only human."

He smiled back tightly, but I could tell it was forced. He was uncomfortable, which was unique to see in his Shift.

"Ooh, is that an offer? Why Twin, are you flirting with me?"

He scowled at me, which looked much darker with his pointed teeth and black eyes, but I simply smiled back. He assessed me from head to toe as I approached and I felt his eyes devour me even from behind his Shift. The look would have seemed almost intimate if it wasn't for the disgusted pull at the edge of his lips.

When I passed him he grabbed my arm, sending a fiery prickle up to my shoulder. My first reaction was to pull away, but I didn't, instead, I turned into him. I wouldn't back down, not this time. My behavior had him off balance and I was determined to win this battle. I remembered all too well the previous night. He had definitely won that round. I pressed into him as I spoke in a low voice.

"You're right, they weren't that fun. If you ever wake up from another old-age dream and can't sleep, you know where I am."

I smiled up at him, letting my sharp teeth show before pushing off him into a fighting stance.

"I'm warmed up if you are."

Sorry for all the delays! But it's okay....right? RIGHT?! No really, it's coming.

Soon. And down to Hell we go...

T.