《Humor》Weird Story
Advertisement
_______________
(Mans perspective)
I walked into the shop and immediately saw her. Her creamy pale glow. The way she seemed to have no cares in the world. No one could make her feel anything, but pain. At that moment I wanted to take her as mine. Order her right off the menu. Eat her out.
And so I did what I had to do, I called the waiter over and said could I have her please. Looking a little confused as to the fact that she was already with someone else, he said one second. That one second turned into ten minutes and his only explanation was that they were out of her tasty pale skin. None left to grind to a crisp, none left to taste in ecstasy.
And the wait was worth it because when he brought her over my mouth began to water in joy. I couldn't help but get a little wet.
From the spit of my watery mouth dripping down onto me. She was there for me to savor. All mine. Every last bit of her for me to taste, hold...
Sniff.
She was all mine. A little salty, just how I liked it.
I dug in, eating and swallowing. No chewing in between. It was all I could ever want. The smell alone could make my mouth water. I couldn't bare it anymore, there was something missing, something that would cover her and make this salvation even sweeter.
I called the waiter over again and simply said 9 words that I knew I could never regret. They made her even sweeter than it ever thought imaginable.
"Can I have some gravy for my mashed potatoes?"
_____________________
Advertisement
- In Serial9 Chapters
Do The Wyrm
'Bard's, warriors, tricksters, and idiots in equal measure. They wield the power of magic and song in tandem. Weaving together cunning spells and insulting songs into attacks far more ruthless and personal than a simple fireball.' -The Classinomicon 'Wyrms, born from the ancient magic of dead dragons and giants felled in the seventh heavenly war. And birthed through the Spider Serpent Loki tricking the Earth Mother into playing a twisted melody. Wryms are monsters that burrow deep into the ground, through the sea, and into the sky. Feasting on the ambient flows of energy within each, their scales (and chitin depending on their type) can be forged into incredible armor. They serve as a worthy foe to any mid-level adventuring party. -Evelyn's Guide to Monsters & Mind-Bending Terrors 'What!? A Wyrm Bard attacked and killed all your friends? You either may be the unluckiest lad on the face of this plane, or the most stupidest adventurer from the High Dusks to the Low Tides! Get this dog out of my guild, don't want his stupidity to spread. -Guild Manager after idiotic adventurer made a scene and stabbed someone. Seriously, Wyrm Bards can't be real. Right?
8 173 - In Serial26 Chapters
Rodentia Adventures
In a world both very distant from our own, yet simultaneously existing right beneath our very eyes, a brave warrior ventures into a hidden shrine in search of one thing: A legendary weapon with the power to destroy an ancient evil, and free her people from its tyranny. Then, a bunch of other stuff happens!
8 61 - In Serial7 Chapters
Wyrm's Den
Quest Objective: Enter the Sorrowborn Caverns and find the terrible Wyrm of Azern, a feral draconic creature that was summoned by a band of crazed cultists. Difficulty: Insanity With the hardest quest in the game, Dragon Kings of the New World, only available to complete one night of the year, Sivlander and his friends get ready for one hell of a rough night.... Release Schedule *NEW CHAPTER EVERY WEEK!* Chapter Two — 21st August 2017 Chapter Three — 28th August 2017 Chapter Four — 4th September 2017 Chapter Five — 11th September 2017 Chapter Six — 18th September Chapter Seven — 25th September * Want FREE LitRPG? Get a 100,000+ word dragon fantasy LitRPG today—http://www.subscribepage.com/r3o0o5!
8 179 - In Serial28 Chapters
The Heroes' Story After Saving the World
After being summoned to another world Jordan has lived quite the life. He became a knight, met a princess, ended a decade-long war, married and had children. And now ... his new slow life could not be any better. Follow Jordan, his family and his friends and their new life in a new world after war. An episodic Slice of Life Fantasy story, that allows you to jump into it at any point.
8 197 - In Serial23 Chapters
Filthy
"i'm gonna be out with the girls." i lied. you nodded.why did you believe that? lowercase intendedranking:no. 2 in #poem 02/08/21no. 9 in #poem 04/20/21no. 2 in #poet 05/03/21no. 12 in #poem 06/2/22no. 7 in #poet 07/15/22
8 222 - In Serial23 Chapters
Finally
Clara Fisher is a single mother who 23 years old, with a one year old daughter, Daisy Mae. The father left when he found Clara was pregnant. Her parents kicked her out when they found out she was pregnant. She moved in with her best friend and her fiance, Natalie and Jim. She then had to move out because they were having a baby and she was fine with it.Nikki Holland met her while she was out food shopping for a run down apartment when Nikki gave her an offer to live with Tom Holland, her eldest. When she moves in and his OK with it since they did have crushes on each other.They live together, and Tom treats Daisy as his own. Will they fall for each other or will they just be friends?
8 81

