" princess you have a visiter," madam said making me look up from my book. I've been in this castle for the past week and I've been visited by Sultana Mihrimah once and prince Mehmed almost every day and prince Chihangir visited me twice with Hürrem, can't say I was delighted by her visit but I sure was for young Chihangir, the princes Selim and Beyazid visited me a couple of times too, but no sign of Mustafa which made me very sad.

"Let them in," I said placing my book down and fixed my hair thinking it probably was one of the princes here to visit me like usual.

I was shocked when I saw him walk through the doors with a small smile on his face. I shot up and bowed trying to hide my shock at his arrival, it was prince Mustafa in all his glory.

"Princess Thyra," he said as I stood back up straight, oh how I missed his voice and the way he said my name, shut up brain I can't think like that.

"Welcome Prince Mustafa" I smiled at him as he walked closer and sat down on the couch, I turned around and faced him.

"Come sit beside me," he said patting the space beside him. I walked over and sat down beside him trying to stop my hands from shaking. He had this effect on me that made me feel some type of way.

"So how have you been spending your days here, I heard that my sibling visit you frequently," he said leaning back and putting his arm on the back of the couch almost touching my shoulder which made my heart skip a beat.

"Yes they do, I even got a visit from sultana Hurrem," I said trying hard not to roll my eyes at her mention.

"What did you talk about?" He asked amused at my reaction to mentioning her.

"Well you know how she's the victim and everyone hates her and tried to kill her," I said sarcastically making him chuckle. He leaned forward making my breath catch in my throat as I noticed how close we really are at this point.

"I came here to bid you farewell before I leave tomorrow morning, " he said looking deeply into my eyes. I felt my heart almost break at the mention of him leaving.

"Already?" I asked lowly trying to hide the sadness that laced my words.

"Manesa needs me, I am its ruler," he said cocking his head a little to the side. He was so close I could almost feel his breath on my face.

"I will miss you," I said before I could think. My eyes widened when I realized what I said, I opened my mouth to apologize but I was cut off by his lips covering mine.

I wrapped my arms around his neck as he pulled me closer by my waist. We didn't break the kiss until we both were out of breath.

"Goodbye princess" he whispered before letting me go and walking out. I panted trying to get back oxygen into my lungs falling into a daze for a minute there, the next thing I know he has already left.

I ran to the window and looked through it to see him already on his horse, he looked back once before he rode away, I sat there and watched him sadly as he got further and further away.

As the weeks passed all I could do was distract myself by reading books and teaching the princes French. I felt heartbroken after he left exactly after our kiss with only one singular word "goodbye".

I sighed looking down at my book feeling almost empty inside, I've never felt this way before and I definitely don't like this void at all.

"Princess here's a letter that just came from the castle," madam said handing me a golden letter holder. I took it from her and opened it rolling out the paper to see what's written.

"It's the sultan requesting me to go with him and his family to Manesa so he can name his first grandchild, Mustafa's son. Because he wanted to show me the beautiful city there" I said feeling sadness build up inside of me.

"I'll start preparing for the journey then," madam said happily before walking out.

I sighed sadly before closing the book that was in my lap and slamming it down on the table beside me with the letter. I got up and walked over to the window opening it to let some fresh air in, feeling like I was suffocating in here.

He has a son from his favourite now, I can never be that, I can never be a favourite, I'm a free woman and I'm not sure if it's okay for me to be in his Harem, not like he wants me to, he's probably just like the rest of the princes in Europe so full of himself and wanted to have some fun.

How could I be so stupid and let him see me so vulnerable? I've been trained all my life to not show any vulnerability yet here I am letting a prince from an "enemy" kingdom see me like this. Enemy? Is he the enemy? No not to me he isn't. He is the guy that I found myself falling for like a total idiot.

God, please help I don't want to do anything that'll hurt me. I don't want anyone to hurt me. I don't want to be hurt again. Please god you're my only saviour please listen from your slave and help me do the right thing before I hurt myself and people around me.