If I say I want him too then that'll be it. We'll be careening along this collision course with broken heart station straight ahead. Seven months from now, I'll be a mess.

Or maybe our hearts won't get quite involved enough, and we'll decide we don't like each other all that well after all. Then it'll be however many months of pretending we haven't tasted each other, that we didn't spend hours mapping each other's bodies in the dead of night. Because if there's one thing I know for absolute certain, I intend to memorize every spectacular inch of Ash Galvin.

It's important for me to go into this affair self-aware and honest about the risks and limitations. No matter which way we end, it won't be good, and the only thing either of us knows for sure is that whatever this is will end.

Falling headlong into heartbreak might be the dumbest thing I've ever done in my life, but being around him and not being with him has bested what I once considered to be ironclad common sense. Ash is my breaking point, for everything.

"I think," I say, licking my lips. "I think we should keep it just between you and me. Nothing in front of the kids. We don't tell anyone. So then, if it doesn't work out, it's less awkward."

"Just you and me," he says. "That's all I want anyway."

"This is a bit terrifying, isn't it?" I wring my hands together in front of me. "Are we doing the right thing?"

He searches my face. "I don't want to spend the rest of my life wondering what I might have had with you."

And that, more than anything else he could have said propels me over the edge. My feelings are mirrored in him—desperate and hungry.

"I reckon we'll be alright if we take care of each other," he says.

When he starts to say something else, I rise on my toes and kiss him. I'm done being convinced, or rather having him restate my own worries. Doing this doesn't have to change things between us. We can keep a line drawn between Nanny Ash and Paige the employer and whatever we're embarking on. We just have to be honest with each other and remember this isn't forever.

He meets my kiss, and I'm reminded of how good this was last time as he slides his hand into my hair and tilts his head, deepening the connection. We kiss and kiss while our hands explore each other, sliding over clothes and then under.

"Bedroom?" he murmurs against my neck, and I shiver at the contact.

"We definitely need a locked door." I let out a soft chuckle as he takes my hand and leads me up the stairs. At the top, as we walk along the hallway, I latch onto him from behind and loop my arms around his waist. He puts his big hand over mine and gives me a reassuring squeeze.

Once we're in the door, Ash locks it, and he worries his lip. "I've only done this with one other person, so I'm gonna need you—you'll need to tell me what you like. Tell me what you want me to do, and I'll do it."

Refreshingly honest, just like everything else about him. But it's shocking in many ways that Imogen is the only woman he's ever been with. He's gorgeous with an easy-going personality that only elevates his attractiveness.

Whenever I go anywhere with him, women size him up, and Gwen had the same experience. He's a magnet, and I'm flattered, and more than a little touched, that I'm the one he's drawn to.

"I have no problem telling you what I like," I say, stepping into him.

"Do you reckon I can tell you what I like too?" He scans my face while his thumb caresses my cheek.

"You planning to talk dirty to me, Ash?" I slide my hands under his shirt, marveling at the reality of being able to touch him any way I want.

"Would you like that?" His voice is husky, and he kisses under my ear before grazing my earlobe with his teeth.

"Yeah," I say, already at the mercy of the lust haze coating my vision. Casual is all I've allowed myself since I had Joey, and what we're embarking on should be casual but feels anything but.

"You'll tell me if you don't?"

"What is it you've been thinking about, Mr. Galvin?" My voice is breathless as his rough palm slides up my bare leg, stopping just before the hem of my skirt.

"So many things, Miss. Johnston. Like you, in this skirt, all day." His fingers ease under the hem, and I'm aware of every inch he conquers with his touch.

"Oh?" I ask, parting my legs to grant him better access. God knows I want him to explore all of me the same way I plan to claim every piece of him.

"Wanted to slide my hand underneath your skirt to feel how warm you were. How wet." His hand follows the trail his words left, and his fingers skim over my damp panties. He groans. "You're already wet for me."

"All the time," I say, and I mean it. Heat pools between my legs, and I ache with desire at least once a day because of something he's said or done in the house.

Watching him build that playhouse was a recipe for getting me off every single night. Ash, shirtless and sweaty with pants slung low on his waist, creating something beautiful, is apparently my idea of porn. What other skills does he have in his toolbox?

"Fuck, Paige," he mutters, and then he kisses me again.

I tug his shirt over his head, and we're shedding clothes in a rush of hurried movements. Our lips only break contact long enough to land on another stretch of skin, and I'm surprised there's not a hint of awkwardness between us. Now that we've committed to doing this, neither of us is holding back.

"I have thought about you like this so many times." At the edge of the bed, he slides my panties down my legs, and his index finger slips between my folds, caressing my most sensitive spots. "Do you like this?"

"Yes." I clutch his biceps, and I arch into the contact. My body is begging for more, and I fear I'm not far behind. "So much."

"You're gorgeous. So fucking gorgeous." He grazes my nipple with his other thumb before taking the bud into his mouth.

His boxer-briefs are still on, but even through the material I can tell what I'll find underneath is impressive.

The briefest frisson of unease snakes down my spine at the realization that we'll be making life in this house a lot more complicated. Maybe lust shouldn't be guiding us? So irrational.

But then Ash sheds his last scrap of clothing, and any hint of rational thought leaves me. He's long and thick and so hard. He's hard for me, which is such a turn on.

Although I found him attractive from the minute he showed up on my doorstep, I never in a million years expected to end up like this with him. Never anticipated how close we'd become, how right being with him would feel. Because this might not be rational, but it doesn't feel wrong either.

When I grip his shaft, he sucks in a sharp breath and closes his eyes. Then he grabs the back of my head and kisses me deeply. His fingers stroke my clit, circling the bundle of nerves, causing me to moan into his mouth.

"You like that?"

"Yes," I say, and when my knees start to wobble, he scoops me up and sets me on the bed.

At the edge of the bed, his hungry gaze sweeps over me laid out for him. "I want to lick you, Paige. I need a taste," he says.

"Yes," I say. "I want to feel your mouth on me."

He emits a deep groan of pleasure and falls to his knees at the side of the bed, tugging me to the edge. "Tell me what feels good," he says before he licks a line up my center and swirls over my clit.

"More," I say. "More of that."

And it turns out that Ash excels in taking directions everywhere in life. In the past, when a guy went down on me, it felt like a dance between what I needed and what he was prepared to do, but with Ash, whatever I ask for, he does.

When I can feel myself approaching the brink, I'm desperate to feel him inside me.

"Ash, I want you," I murmur.

"Come on my tongue, Paige."

The gravely texture to my name along with the consistent pressure sends me flying over the edge, and I grip onto his forearms as I'm swept up into a haze of indescribable pleasure. I can't even remember the last time I had an orgasm this strong.

"Holy shit," I whisper as wave after wave washes over me.

Ash kisses a line up my body until he's lying beside me, and I run a hand along the side of his face.

"Next time," I say, "I want you fucking me as I come."

He lets out a soft chuckle and gathers me close to bury his face in my neck. Against my skin, he says, "Noted."

I run my fingers through the back of his hair. "Which is what you should be doing right now."

"I haven't got anything," he says. "No condoms."

I duck away from him, and I crawl across the bed to the nightstand drawer. There, I grab the box Gwen bought me before she left—large size because she was sure he was going to need them. I laughed at her brazenness, but now I'm grateful.

"I love that I get to see you naked now," Ash says from his spot in the middle of the bed.

As I make my way back to him, I trail a line of kisses up his legs, and I tease a path across his hipbones. His hands snake into my hair, holding it off my face.

"Your tongue feels amazin'," he says.

With a sly smile, I lick up his shaft in a quick swipe, and he sucks in a breath. "Against your dick?"

"Not likely to say no to that, am I?" He releases a chuckle.

I bite my lip, and our gazes meet across the expanse of his chest before I grip him tightly and take him in my mouth. He hisses out a breath while I circle the tip with my tongue.

"Fuck, Paige," he moans as I glide my lips along his shaft while mimicking the same movement with my hand. "If you keep that up, I'm not going to last."

Since I have plans that involve him lasting quite a bit longer, he's not getting any more of my tongue there tonight. When I crawl up his body, he flips us, so I'm pinned to the bed, and he takes the condom from my hand. On his haunches, his molten gaze lingers on my body as he rips open the condom and rolls it on.

"Spread your legs," he says.

There's a confidence in him that's unexpected given what he said to me when we started, and I do as I'm told. I've always been a sucker for a confident man, and one who can back up the confidence with results is even better.

"That's a good girl." He slides his rough palm up my inner thigh. "Still so wet for me."

I am. Wet and eager. There's a good chance I can come again, and it's been a very long time since I've been with a man capable of inspiring multiple orgasms. Ash isn't like any other man I've ever dated.

He lines himself up, and then he stares into my eyes for a beat. "You're sure?"

"Yes," I say. "I want you."

He edges in slowly, filling me up, until we're joined tightly. "Okay?" His voice is strained as he hovers over me.

"So good," I say, and I cup the side of his face. "Go slow."

He rests his forehead against mine. One of his hands grips my ass, and the other cradles the back of my head.

He eases out a little and back in. "You feel so good," he murmurs. "So tight." After a few more slow, gentle thrusts, he says, "Can you come again?"

"Yes," I breathe out. Where I hadn't been sure before, these finite movements that are rubbing us together with flawless precision are causing all my nerve endings to stand at attention once more.

"How?" His voice is hoarse. "Tell me how."

"Just keep doing what you're doing. Don't stop."

"I can do that." He lets out a gentle chuckle. "I reckon I'll never want to do anything else ever again."

I clutch the back of his head, and he kisses me slow and deep as he maintains a similar rhythm inside me. Everything in me is coiling and tightening, and I couldn't care less about anything but the feel of his body against mine. Such exquisite pleasure as he rocks against me.

"Oh, Paige." He sounds drunk, but I love how needy my name is on his lips, as though his enjoyment begins and ends with me. "You feel so fucking good."

"Ash." I dig my nails into his back as my second orgasm is poised to rush through me. "Fuck. I'm going to come."

"Come for me, Paige," he murmurs against my ear. "I want to feel you coming around my cock."

I let out a little cry, and I grip onto him while I'm swept into a haze of intense bliss. As I'm coming, he increases his pace enough that my orgasm is prolonged while he chases his own, and I can't remember the last time sex was this good. He's ruining me for anyone else. No one else will ever be everything he is.

When he tightens his hold on me and drives into me one last time, I welcome the surge that follows while he kisses me and shudders on top of me.

Wise or not, nothing between us will ever be the same again.

⭐️

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