Chapter 25:

Camila burst into the house. The music that was being blasted into her ears deafened her senses. A layer of sweat covered her body. She was itching for the relaxing, warm feeling a shower could provide. The air felt scratchy and arid in her throat. It was more than just her vigorous run that created the uncomfortable, restless feeling that was pulling body closer to the earth.

Taine was sitting at the table with a pen and notebook in hand. Probably more preferrable companions to him than she could be.

She stole a glance at him and when their eyes connected a feeling of crippling embarrassment twisted itself in her heart. She was too tired to hide it. Their interaction the previous day had been a disaster.

She checked the time and hurried up the stairs to get ready.

That night she and Taine had been invited for a special dinner.

Although the dinner and party invitations were thrown at them fast and furiously, Taine often made the judgment call and decided if the event was worth attending. Camila never had the heart to turn down a free meal and an opportunity to socialise but she was fine to let Taine think he had some semblance of control over their social lives.

Jane and Adrian were a rich, idealistic couple that had been born into the pack. Because of their social influence and opulence, Taine had to remain in their good graces. The Alpha ran the pack, but these veterans possessed a rather comparable amount of respect in the pack hierarchy. It was all an intricate web of power games. They were on the pack council and liked to throw around their extensive knowledge on just about everything in just about everyone's faces. Camila liked them for the simple reason that Taine hated them. He often made flippant comments about them taking too damn long to die.

It was no longer simple like in the old days, where one's wolf side was stronger, more basic, more instinctual. Matters used to be settled by canines sinking into flesh and growls echoing through the night. Now, the human side with its twisted, ambitious, power-hungry, personal agenda liked to assert itself.

She knew the occasion meant she needed to brush up on which forks and spoons to use for which type of minuscule rich people food when Taine made her go shopping for something 'nice' to wear the previous day.

---

After coming home from a rejuvenating solo shopping trip Camila felt giddy. There was no particular reason for it, she was just happy.

Okay... she may have had a drink...Or four with her lunch. Thinking about the dinner that night was proving to be too stressful. And after her drinks, the tension in her body unwound itself and fell in waves in a puddle at her feet.

She had never been a drinker, but the softer and lighter the world became, the more relaxed she felt. It was glorious.

The common-sense blinding mixture of potent liquid and unstable emotions, made her plop down next to Taine on the couch without a second thought. She waited for him to acknowledge her. To ask what the contents of her shopping bags were, but he didn't. She felt her lower lip jutt out in a pout.

When she was like this, she could never keep her thoughts to herself. Blunt like a butter knife but sharp like a needle.

She plucked the laptop that Taine was staring so intently at, from his lap and placed it on the floor.

"Why are you such an asshole."

Even her brashness didn't gain much of a reaction from Taine. He just raised an eyebrow at her words.

Camila threw her hands up in the air. "See this is exactly what I mean!"

"You're not exactly a ray of sunshine yourself."

A deep frown set itself over her forehead. "You're so so mean to me...You make me sad."

Taine looked at her. The left corner of his mouth turned down.

"How drunk are you right now?"

She tapped her finger to her chin in contemplation. "I don't think I'm gonna remember this conversmations."

He readjusted himself so he was facing her. "hmm. I see."

It was hard to tell this far into the haze, but there was an indecipherable emotion on Tanie's face.

"Why do I make you sad, Mila?"

She blinked at him confused. He looked genuinely bothered by her comment. He looked at her like he cared.

"I can't tell you." She said cautiously. She bit her tongue to keep secrets from slipping out.

"Why?"

She was staring at him like he had spawned another head. He had grabbed her hand and was gently holding it. Him growing a third head was more likely than him actually showing her affection. Her mind screamed at her to pull away, but she told her mind to shut up.

There were so many things she could say. The way he distanced her with one look. The way he didn't seem to want to spend time with her, the way he hardly told her she was beautiful or that her cooking was the 'best he'd ever tasted' even though she'd know he was lying. The way she knew, he could hear her cry herself to sleep some nights... And the most paralysing, soul-destroying reason of all...No, she couldn't say that.

Work was good and fulfilling, but it wasn't a big enough, or strong enough bridge to overcome the distance between them.

But it wasn't all bad... Although she never expected more than the mildly teetering distance she had grown accustomed to, there were.... moments. They were few and far between but they imprinted themselves on her heart nevertheless. It wasn't all bad...

It was a strange way he made her happy. Small and strange. It made her happy when she could visibly see his body relax with relief when she came home from her late night runs. It made her happy when he arranged the pillows on the couch, just the way she liked. Once she saw him inhale her shirt before putting it in the washing machine. Sometimes he set out her favourite mug for her in the mornings.

But these transient moments...They weren't enough to outweigh the sadness. And the pain.

He asked again, tilting his head closer to hers. Seeming desperate for an answer.

Her drunk brain decided to once again take over and do the talking. "I think you're cheating on me."

At least it was smart enough to turn the conversation in another direction.

Immediately he pulled his hand away and sat up straight, inadvertently distancing himself from her. "Why do you think that?"

Camila grabbed a nearby cushion and pressed it to her chest, yearning for some external comfort to share her unease with.

She mumbled into the edge of the plush pillow, "you think I'm stupid...I'm not. I smell you. I smell whoever you've been with, when you come home some nights."

Taine moved away from her like she had stung him. His resolve melted and there was a panicked look in his eyes. "No...Mila I could never...I"

Camila flung the pillow at his face. "I'll pretend I believe you. I'll pretend I believe that you actually want me."

The voice in her head chastised her for sounding so desperate and whiney, but like she had been doing all day, she told it to shut the hell up.

She stood up on her knees and moved closer to him. All they could see was each other's eyes. She placed a tentative hand on his face. It was rough and cool underneath her warm fingertips.

She softly whispered into the air between them, "Why do you hate me?"

She could feel his light breath brush her cheek. Her eyes flickered down to his lips and in that moment, it was all she could think about. All the reasons and consequences and doubts were pushed away and silenced.

One look at the bow in his lips and his dark dilated eyes.

That was all it took.

The spell had been cast and the bond, irresistible and tired of being suppressed, broke the earth apart. And like a bewitching magnetism, it wove them into one another with a power that unleashed itself over them like a tiger that had been waiting to pounce.

She hadn't realised how desperate she was for his touch, for his smell, for him. All she wanted was to be forever lost in this blissful tangle of lips, breath, touches. She sighed into his skin. Felt herself fall into his arms.

His hands traced the skin on the back of her legs and hers embedded themselves into his hair, tugging him closer and closer.

He pressed into her hips and she pushed against him, sending a wave of painful heat throughout her body. Wanting, needing to be consumed.

His lips were soft but demanding. With each kiss, he pulled her, teased her, made her want to let go of the past.

Her fingers found themselves resting on the buttons of his shirt, shy and tentative. Opening her eyes slightly to see what she was doing, she froze in her tracks.

The pendant on her necklace had come out from under her shirt and was resting on Taine's chest, next to her fingers. The diamond ring glinted at her dangerously in the light. Suddenly the metal chain felt hot on her skin.

Taine's lips moved to her neck and she wished she could simply close her eyes and forget. But the memories were burned onto the back of her eyelids and she saw them every time she blinked.

"Stop."

Taine kept pressing kisses onto her skin.

"Taine, I said stop."

She ripped herself away from him. She refused to meet his eyes. She could still hear his heavy breaths.

"What's wrong?"

She unconsciously played with the necklace.

"Mila, I'm not cheating on you."

She slowly lifted her eyes to his but didn't dare speak. She knew the shakiness of her voice would give away that she was close to tears.

Her eyes fell back down to the ring. Taine's gaze followed.

"That ring." He pointed a finger directly at her chest.

Instinctively she wrapped it inside her palm, shielding it from him.

He looked angry now. "You never take it off. Who gave it to you?"

Camila subtlety tried to wipe a tear that was threatening to fall.

"I can't do this right now."

She moved her finger back and forth in the space between them. "That. It was a mistake."

She tried to get up from the couch and walk away, but the alcohol in her system plus her lightheadedness from the kiss made it difficult for her to move straight.

Taine stood up and placed his hand on her arm to steady her. She pulled it away.

As she grabbed her bags and walked to her room he called out to her, "You asked me why I hate you...I should be asking you the same question."

---

Camila was wrong. She had remembered every damn second of that conversation.

And that was why, as they drove to dinner that night. The car was silent and filled with regret.

She was beyond embarrassed and unfortunately sober

Every time Camila tried to end the silence that was suffocating them, Taine would slice her efforts with one-word answers. Camila looked out the window and with each passing tree and wolf, she wished that life didn't have to be so complicated.