《Royal Jester》29. Anastasia
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"I still can't believe Mason knows," Lili paused, eyes widening. "And that he loves you, and that you told him you love him."
Ana nodded, "It's a little surreal."
Lili seemed to hesitate for a moment, her eyebrows furrowing as she took a bite of her ice cream. Then finally, "And you actually love him? You didn't just say you do?"
The older princess went still - a spoonful of partially melted desert mere centimeters from her mouth - before she quickly turned to face Lili. "Of course I do! Well," she bit her lip, "At least I think I do."
"You think you do?" Lili's eyebrows raised with clear bafflement.
Ana suddenly felt strangely bashful and focused her gaze on the tree behind her younger sister. "I've never been in love before," she shrugged. "I can't exactly say whether I know if I do or not, but the way I feel when I'm with Mason has to be something more than just liking him."
She forced herself to look at Lili only to be met with the perfect expression of indifference. Seriously? "Well how do you feel when you're with him?"
"Just - I don't know - wonderful. It's like I'm suddenly more than just a pretty face or royalty; he looks at me and it feels like he actually sees me. And he's not perfect or flawless by any means," Ana shook her head with a fond smile, "But there are so many things about him that make him perfect for me. I've never felt so comfortable with someone in my entire life, Lili. I never want that feeling to go away."
The young princess shrieked then and Ana flinched at the noise. "You're totally in love!"
"How would you know?" Ana gave her an incredulous expression, recoiling slightly when she started bouncing in her seat.
"Because you sound like a complete fool when you talk about him!"
Ana rolled her eyes, "You're so annoying, you know that?" But she couldn't keep from laughing as Lili threw her arms around her waist.
Suddenly Lili pulled away, her eyes flickering nervously around as she sat stiffly next to Ana. "I think you're going to find me even more annoying when I tell you what I just did."
"Why?" Sentences that make Ana uneasy? That one.
Lili squeezed her eyes closed, "I might have gotten ice cream in your hair."
"What?!" Ana immediately grabbed at her hair, cringing when her fingers came into contact with the cold substance. At least it was wash day.
"I can go get Jeremy," Lili adjusted to stand but Ana laid a hand on her shoulder to stop her from moving anymore.
Jeremy had accompanied the two sisters to town earlier for some unknown reason, but they had separated when the princesses spotted the small ice cream shop. After they bought the ice cream (despite the worker's protests) they had gone outside to find a bench to eat on.
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Maybe they should've sat inside, where it was less likely to get covered in dessert.
Ana sighed, "It's fine. I can get him, you finish your ice cream." Ana had seen him enter a hardware store across the street only a few minutes after they found the bench outside. And - with any luck- he might still be there.
After informing their bodyguards about the change of plans, the older princess began making her way across the street with an appointed guard at her side.
Whilst she wasn't sure why Jeremy would come to a hardware store in town when they had basically everything one would need at that castle already, she didn't think to question it. That was until she had walked inside.
It was an older building, probably built decades before Ana had even been born. But it appeared well taken care of, although Ana wasn't sure by who.
She paused for a moment just outside the door; it resembled a house so she felt that it was only appropriate to knock. But the sign did say it was a store so- she shrugged and pushed it open.
She completely froze upon seeing what greeted her.
It was Jeremy. Jeremy and a man. Jeremy and a man kissing.
Jeremy, the crown prince of Mysteria who was supposed to be looking for a bride, was currently kissing a man.
She gasped and they both seemed to notice her presence as they pulled away from each other so quickly that she hardly even processed they moved at all. "Anastasia." Jeremy's eyes were wide, his lips swollen and clear markings decorating the previously covered skin of his chest.
"Jeremy," she was at a complete loss of words.
Ana finally let herself look at the stranger, eyebrows furrowing when she realized that he looked familiar. The poor man looked horrified, his mouth agape and face completely ashen.
They all stared silently at each other before Jeremy suddenly sped towards Ana and pushed her back out the door. "Why are you here?" His voice was frantic, his movements even more so as he paced in front of her.
She bit her lip, "I got ice cream in my hair, I was hoping you would be able to retrieve the car."
Jeremy kicked at the ground, dirt lifting up and smearing streaks of brown on Ana's shoes. Then he cried out, a sound so full of grief that she felt her eyes burn.
Ice cream in her hair wasn't worth this. Ice cream in her hair wasn't worth seeing her brother so clearly miserable. She didn't care how dirty her hair had gotten, she never wanted to see anyone she cared about in such agony.
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"I'm sorry," she began in a whisper. "If I had known-," she stopped, "No you didn't want me to know." She cleared her throat. "I should have called beforehand; I know it's only the polite thing to do. And I can't even begin to imagine how you feel now that I've seen what you obviously did not want to show me."
She met Jeremy's eyes, "I am so so sorry."
"It's too late now," those four words were so thick with emotion that Ana wondered if he actually might cry.
"I won't tell anyone," she promised vehemently. "I won't ever say anything to anyone. I'm sure that you didn't want anyone to know, especially me, so I would never-," she was interrupted before she could say anything more.
"What do you mean especially you?"
Ana blinked, "Don't you hate me?"
Jeremy sighed heavily at the question and she was curious to know why it was suddenly taking so long to answer. He had always hate her, wasn't that the way it was? "You're my little sister, Anastasia. Of course I don't hate you." She gave him a look. "Completely."
That made the princess giggle softly and her brother's pacing slowed before stopping altogether as he stood in front of her. "You could've fooled me," she said after a moment.
"It's just that," he shook his head as he gathered his thoughts. "It's just that ever since you were born you were suddenly everything mother and father could want. I loved having a little sister at first, I loved having someone to play with when they were busy. But it was like you consumed their entire lives when you were born."
Ana hadn't ever even considered the real reason Jeremy seemingly despised her; she was never able to see past his obvious dislike. "Even when you were five years old and Liliana had just been born, they spent more time with you than her. It was so unfair."
"Liliana and I were raised by the caretakers the king and queen hired; you were raised by our parents."
Her eyes widened with understanding. "I'm sorry," she stepped back slightly. "I never even realized-," he interrupted her once more.
"And you shouldn't have to Anastasia. It's normal for parents to raise their own kids, Liliana and I just weren't that lucky." He looked away from her then and she wondered how upset he really was.
"But what about now?"
Jeremy's confusion was clear on his face, "What?"
"You mentioned why you hated me when we were kids, but why do you hate me now?" She could understand the concept of being bitter towards someone because you were envious of the attention they were receiving, but that didn't explain why he still didn't like her.
"Don't you get it Anastasia?" While the words themselves were rude, the way he said it - so soft and sad - made it anything but. He gave her a sad smile when she shook her head. "Mother and father would never even consider letting me leave the country on my own. And yet here you are."
"It's like you can never do any wrong. I accidentally broke a vase once when you were almost ten, do you remember that? Mother had ran into the room and started yelling at me, but then you lied and said it was you. You didn't even get punished, Anastasia."
"And it's still like that today. You went against father's direct order and came up with an entire plan in order to go to school and they didn't do anything. But I know that even if I mentioned my sexuality then they would throw a complete fit. It's my duty to get married to the opposite sex so I can produce an heir and I can't imagine how they would react if I were to tell them that I can't."
Ana didn't know what to say. She had never noticed her parent's favoritism but it all made sense now. Lili had often complained about how strict their mother was but Ana never understood that because she was had never even been yelled at by her.
She couldn't imagine how terrible it felt to see such blatant bias and not be able to do a single thing.
She released a low breath, "I can't believe I never noticed; I would be upset as well if I were you."
She paused, mentally debating over what she was going to say before finally deciding it would be better to be as straightforward as possible.
"And I might not know how they would react to you being gay," that felt so strange to say, " but I do know that you could still have an heir. Surrogates exist, and there are so many wonderful little kids out in the world that don't have parents. I'm sure they would be more than grateful if you took them in."
She wanted to support Jeremy in whatever he decided, even if it meant he would be abdicating the throne so he could live happily with his partner. That would make her the next in line; she felt breathless from the thought.
"I don't know if I'll ever be able to tell them," he stated simply.
Ana glanced down at the words, feeling herself smile when she noticed that he hadn't even bothered fixing his clothes earlier. "You know that your shirt is unbuttoned?"
"Yes I see that now, thank you."
~~~
doesn't
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