《"Hate And Shame" -Poems of a mentally ill person-》summer joy ☆
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Summer has always been my favorite and my least favorite season at once.
On one side, I love it.
I love the beating sun as it shines through my window, shining bright yellow light into my bedroom, brining a smile onto my usually depressed face.
I love the heat prickling on my skin, the way my skin goes back to it's natural tanned colour.
I love the way that there's people being happy everywhere, having fun and being with their loved ones.
I love the warm colors, the perfect trees, the blooming flowers and berries.
I love the warm, happy atmosphere that the summer has, the friendliness, the welcoming smile of the sun rising on the horizon.
But sometimes, I hate summer.
I hate the beating sun as it blinds me through my window, shining bright yellow light into my bedroom, forcing me to close the blinds in his face.
I hate the heat prickling on my skin, the way my skin burns and itches when I stay outside for too long.
I hate the way that there's people being happy everywhere, having fun and being with their loved ones, while I sit there, alone and depressed.
I hate the warm colors, the trees who are gonna go back to being nude after a few weeks, the flowers and berries who already begin to rot and turn to jam because of the heat.
I hate the warm, happy atmosphere that the summer has, the friendliness, the welcoming smile of the sun rising on the horizon, trying his best to make me joyful, when all I really feel is a growing void inside my chest.
And my hatred and my love is both for the same reasons.
And I think it's the same for some people in my life.
May 11th 2022
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