I miss the feeling of hunger dwelling inside my belly.

The sharp pain pings in my stomach that felt like little rewards throughout the day.

I miss the looks filled with sorrow and the "are you okay?"s when I didn't eat anything, for hours, days, never.

I miss the way people worried about the number on the scale decreasing day by day.

I miss the sunken in eye bags, the way you could see my spine through my skin, the arms that looked like sticks.

I miss the pride swelling up in my chest while sitting on a table of 12, with all eating, but me.

I miss the way all my clothes became way too oversized and the way I needed belts with all my pants so that they didn't fall off my hips.

Sometimes, I miss being a walking, half rotten corpse, because atleast I was special.

14th January 2022