《My Salvation (CURRENTLY EDITING)》Chapter 56
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POV
It's a blessed feeling to be loved by the love of your life. The care, the attention, the feeling of you being the most important person even though you hardly deserve to be, is such an incredible feeling.
I feel I am hard on Aadil. Even though I know what he went through, the pain, the distress, the hurt, the sufferings, I still am not going back to him completely. It's not that I don't want to, who will ever wish to stay away from there loved ones? Especially when that person is all that you can say head over heels on you! It's not only one-sided, even I am but I won't disclose it now or else I won't be able to stop myself from going back to him.
A knock on the door brought me out of my la-la land. "Nawal, are you ready yet? We are getting late!"
Sugar! I've still not decided what to wear, I want to wear something which matches with Aadil showing that we are a couple. We and couple, it gives a tingling sensation in my stomach. I need to have a grip on my blood vessels running across my cheeks.
"Ah, Aadil, could you please help me out in c-choosing a d-dress?" the battle going on within myself among the brain and the heart had a very tough competition. Asking this simple yet the most difficult question got me stuttering. Aadil looked at me with a smirk and walked towards the closet and stood beside me, not too close but not even far enough.
"At times I feel so proud that it is me and only me who has the ability to make you blush and wallah, you look so cute that I can't help but keep on falling for you harder every single time." Ya Allah, I feel I am a very close competition to a tomato. I began rubbing my cheeks off.
"Don't, don't do that. I just told you I am proud of it. In fact, I should click a picture of you this way, you know to show our kids how their mom used to blush when she was in the company of their handsome dad!" he took the phone from the pocket and started clicking pictures. I immediately hid my face under his chest and mumbled to stop pulling my leg! He pulled me close and held me tightly and started clicking pictures again.
"That's enough for now. Can you select the dress for me now?" He pouted a little and I swear my insides were saying 'aww' loudly. I somehow controlled myself and he made his way to my closet. Surprisingly he didn't make much mess as he does with his clothes. His face looks determined as if picking my dress was the most important thing for him. I was shamelessly watching him and hoping he won't notice me.
He selected a beautiful dark blue coloured top which had a belt near the waist, on trying it, it would give a puffed kind of look similar to a frock. The top was sleeveless. It had a long black coloured embroidered net that would cover the arms. Though it was simple but quite beautiful!
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"Guess a black pant will do. You'll look beautiful in it. Not that you don't look on a regular basis. Now go!" And with that, he made his way out.
}♥{
I took a quick shower and wore the dress. Honestly? This dress looks like it was made for me. I kept twirling around my mirror that I didn't notice Aadil entering my room.
"Ay! I am not done yet. Go and wait for...ten minutes. Yeah, that much time is enough for me. Oh, an- why are you coming here? I just said-"
When I turned around, I saw his gaze in a fixed position, specifically on my arms. Why-
Oh, God. Oh no. No. No, no, no! How could I be so careless? How I didn't notice the sleeves barely cover my arms, let alone my scars! I slowly looked up to see his reaction and he looked pale. The blood drained out of his face, looking horrified. The secret that I tried covering up was in front of his eyes. I knew that at this moment he will look at me with disgust and not with warmth and love. I tried to not think about that but my eyes deceived me by watering.
"Are these," he took a long breath, "caused by.... me?" He said the last word in a whisper. That explains why he looked horrified.
"Don't worry. It's not by you." I tried giving a smile but even my cheek muscles declined me.
"Don't worry? Are you out of your mind? You must be joking. How I never noticed this before? Why you never mentioned this to me? Did...did your parents gave that to you?"
I was ashamed. Embarrassed. I didn't expect this to happen right now. I don't know what to say now. I tried to tell, but the inner me was breaking and I won't break down in front of Aadil. Not now. Never.
I turned around as my eyes again went against my plan and a tear escaped. I tried to wipe it without him knowing but he grabbed my shoulders and turned me around.
"Speak Nawal. Please. Let me help you. Let me."
"Help? What kind of help, Aadil! I am a messed up person. I can't change it. Yes. This, all of these scars are from my parents. Why? I don't even know. Seeing them made me realize that not everything is true is life. That person who says they love someone, it's kind of hard to believe for me. That's bad right? For me to think like this? Welcome to my world. I know you will find them disgusting and ugly and it's totally fine if you leave at this moment. Anybody would. Even I would leave, myself!" My eyes were stinging, threatening to spill more tears but I was controlling them. It's hard, that at times like this when you really want to cry your eyes out, you can't. After years of this habit, this makes me feel like stone-hearted.
"How cruel of me. Once upon a time I really thought you were faking about your parents abusing you. I am sorry for even thinking such absurd thing."
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"Why would you think that! Why would I lie about my...about them doing this to me?" He didn't say anything for a few seconds and then he gently took my arms, as if it was made of glass and will break at any moment if holding it in a wrong position. He looked straight into my eyes, with this fierce look that shocked me. He was showing all of his emotions. Everything.
"Mrs Nawal Aadil Sheikh, never, and I mean NEVER think so low of yourself. Leave you? I might have done some foolish stuff in the past, but I am not that big of an idiot to leave you. No. You are the best thing that has ever happened in my life."
He brought my arm near to his lips and kissed the first burned scar. "You are beautiful. Not just the outside beauty but the beauty within! I don't deserve you. You deserve someone else, someone who is pure, who is not a beast but I can't live without you hence I am being selfish. Moreover, I am one lucky guy to have you." He placed another feathery kiss on the bigger scar. "Scars or not, you are still the same Nawal that I liked. The same Nawal who would show how strong and determined she is but is scared from the inside. The Nawal who is scared of nightmares but that doesn't let her being weak."
He moved to my left arm which was covered with more scars. "These scars show that even though you went through so much, you are ready for challenges. These scars show how strong of a woman you are. You are still the same person who blushes everytime someone compliments you. The same who makes me fall in love with her all over again. You thought I would never notice how you still try to get away from me? That you think I will leave you and would never love you like your parents? I am not somebody. Remember this Nawal, the day when I stop loving you will never come. I will love you till my last breath and when we will meet in Jannah In Sha Allah, I will still cherish every single thing with you. You are an amazing woman and our future generations will remember you. Not by the lady with the scars, but the lady with passion. The lady with such strength that men and women will look at themselves with shame for not being that strong. I am proud to have you as my wife. I thank Allah every single day and night for letting you come in my life. For having you as my partner. I promise I will undo all the past memories from your mind and fill them with the best ones possible. I promise to never leave you when you need me the most. I promise to break this barrier that's making you believe everything is fake and make you enter in a place filled with love and happiness. Accept it or not Nawal, but you are kinda stuck with me. And I with you. For the rest of our lives. Never forget that."
At this moment I didn't realize the tears finally came and were not stopping at any moment.
"You will not leave me, right?" I asked in a little child's voice. Hating my voice being vulnerable. But I didn't care. I was in shock. I was left speechless. This is too much for me right now.
"No, my Hayati. My habibti. I would never leave your side. Even if you don't let me enter in your life completely. Even if you reject me and be harsh, this idiot right here," he points at himself, "is not going anywhere soon." And he kissed my tears. I started sobbing silently at this time. Not by being upset, but finally feeling...free, free from everything. Like some sort of burden was off of me. I just felt happy at this moment.
Aadil saw that I wasn't stopping at any moment and I knew what he was about to do. This time I hugged him first. He was surprised for a second then he gave his classic bear hug. He tightened his arms around me. At this moment I felt so small compared to him, yet so comfortable. I snuggled my face into his chest and tightened my arms around his neck as if he will leave me.
When he noticed that I stopped crying, he slowly unwrapped his arms and I instantly felt cold. Maybe I was giving the look of 'hold me again' because the next second he draped his arm around my shoulders and I instantly scooted near him, under his arm. He was smiling at this gesture and before I get embarrassed again, I decided to change the topic. As always.
"So, where are we going?" He gave me an evil smirk and didn't say anything. Oh, how I wish to wipe that smirk off!
"Don't worry darling, it's a secret. For now. Are you fine to go now? It's fine if you are not. We can cancel it and go at any time. I swear I won't be putting pressure on you." He kept on babbling and he looked so adorable. I couldn't control myself and just pinched his cheek.
"You look so adorable like this. It's fine, Aadil. I am ready to go and please don't ever call yourself a beast." He looked shocked, not believing I just pinched his cheek, which I might tell, are becoming little red. He just shook his head. "Say wallah!" and he did repeat.
"Wallah I won't call myself a beast next time and, did you just called me adorable?" He puffed his chest showing off, "that's not manly for me, dear." He kept showing his manliness in a playful way. A giggle escaped from me. He suddenly stopped and looked at me seriously.
"What's wrong?" He then showed his beautiful smile and said,
"Baby, you can call me adorable for the rest of your life, just for the sake of hearing your laugh."
____
*Mourns in a corner for making such a cute fictional guy.*
Hello! We are back with another chapter. Please do leave your feedbacks down in the comment section. We'd really appreciate it.
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