— 25. King of Kattegat

On the cliffs overlooking Kattegat, Tova sat beside Ragnar, wrapped in a large fur cloak. More than a year had passed since Ragnar had become king. Tova was now eighteen and it seemed as though instead of enjoying her life as a grown adult, she was stuck in Kattegat as Ragnar insisted on giving her as many life lessons as he could.

"When the ice finally breaks, we will go back to Wessex and claim the land that King Ecbert promised us. You know that was my dream," Ragnar explained to Tova as they sat together on the cliff, "You know it more than anyone."

Tova let out a large breath, smiling widely at the thought. "I feel my blood warming already," She admitted as she stood up from her seat on the ground, "I am fully healed now and I cannot wait to return to Wessex. I want to fight, I want to raid once more."

"Why do you want to fight?" Ragnar suddenly asked as he watched Tova walked closer to the edge of the cliff to look down at their home, "What are you fighting for?"

"For my home, for my family," She admitted with a small smile on her face.

"Not to become famous?" He questioned as he raised a brow at his daughter.

"I do not care about fame. I only wish to explore and find new places for our people to settle," She explained and Ragnar smiled in response.

"Then you and I believe the same in that aspect," Ragnar responded before he stood up and walked over to her. He glanced downwards before looking back at Tova with a questioning look on his face, "What do you see when you look down there?"

"Snow," Tova replied, a playful smile on her face.

Ragnar rolled his eyes and sighed at Tova's words. "I'm being serious," He reminded her, beginning to smile as well.

"Power," Tova answered without hesitation as her smile gradually faded, "The power of a king. The power that comes with being Ragnar Lothbrok, a man descended from Odin, a man favored by all the gods."

"Power is always dangerous Tova. It attracts the worst and corrupts the best," He informed her in a calm tone, "People like Earl Haraldson, your real father. I never asked for power. Power is only given to those who are prepared to lower themselves to pick it up. I hope that one day, you are prepared to do the same."

Hearing the man's words, Tova immediately whipped herself around to face Ragnar as he walked away. "I...I don't understand," She complained, beginning to frown in concern, "Bjorn will be king after you."

Ragnar stopped for a moment. He turned and smiled at her. "Yes, he will," He replied, just before he began to walk away once more, "But who shall be sitting on the throne beside him? That is the real question you should be asking."

With that, Ragnar walked away and Tova's lips parted. She was unable to form any words, knowing what he was getting at.

_____

In the Seer's home, Tova sat in front of the Seer, an uneasy look on her face. "What is it you wish to ask the gods, Tova Ragnarsdottir...." The Seer had asked her as he gradually trailed off, "Or shall I say, Skadi Haraldsdottir?"

"My name is Tova," Tova argued in a stern tone as he stared at him closely, "And I come here to ask if I will ever have children, old wise one?"

"I cannot see a child in your future, no matter how far I look," He informed her, causing Tova to begin to tear up, "But that isn't quite long, Tova Ragnarsdottir."

"Then I will die young," She replied softly and leaned forward in her seat, "When will I die?"

"Frigg, the wife of Odin has already made a decision but it has not yet been vouchsafed to me," He explained and Tova immediately stood up from her seat, "Come back another day, Tova, Shieldmaiden and Princess of Kattegat, and perhaps I may tell you exactly the moment of your death, if it hasn't already come."

____

Near the docks at Kattegat, Tova gradually made her way over to Bjorn, who was in the middle of arguing with Porunn. He ended up telling the woman he didn't want her to come to Wessex with them, fearing that she was with child and he refused to lose her and the child she may have been carrying already. Porunn had sent Bjorn a glare before storming off, causing Bjorn to sigh in frustration.

Making her way over to Bjorn, Tova laughed as she sarcastically clapped at him. It wasn't long before Bjorn turned to her, an annoyed look on his face. "Haven't you learned by now that bossing women like her around will never get you anywhere in life?" She asked Bjorn, smiling as she stopped in front of him.

"She is so stubborn all the time," Bjorn sighed in defeat as he shook his head, "She does not listen to anything I say. I fear what will happen if she is with child."

"If she is with child and she is dumb enough to still go raiding with us in Wessex, then she doesn't deserve to have a child," Tova explained in a venomous tone, causing Bjorn to frown at her.

"That is harsh," Bjorn remarked and Tova let out a large scoff.

"It is the truth. If I were with child, I'd stay here to ensure the child's safety, no matter how much I wanted to go to Wessex. I'd rather give up the opportunity to raid than sacrifice the wellbeing of my unborn child," Tova explained, trying to contain the sadness she felt at the thought.

Bjorn found himself staring at Tova curiously. He sighed, noticing the sad look on her face. "What is wrong?"

"I've always wanted to be a mother, more than anything in the world. I always wanted a child of my own to love and care for, to nurture, and to raise," She explained, sighing as she walked closer to him.

"And you can," He pointed out, giving her an assuring look, "You just have to find the right person to be with."

"The Seer says I will not have any children. That I will not live long enough to have one," She admitted, causing Bjorn's eyes to widen in horror.

"What?" He gasped, a concerned look appearing on his face.

Tova nodded slightly, tears beginning to form in her eyes. "All my life, I've wanted a child of my own and now, it will never happen. I am eighteen. I have my whole life ahead of me but the thing I want most in life, I won't be able to have. It breaks my heart more than anything."

Bjorn sighed as she began to cry. He stood up and walked over to her. He hugged her tightly in comfort. They remained in place for a long moment.

Gradually, they pulled away from each other, their faces becoming just inches apart. Tova found herself staring up at him and Bjorn looked as though he was about to lean forward. She pulled away and Bjorn sighed, watching as she walked away.

____

At Siggy's Cabin, it was around dinnertime. Tova was sitting on the bed as Siggy cooked. She had been spending a lot more time with her real mother since King Horik's death. And she was beginning to become fond of the bond she was growing with the woman. She wasn't all that bad. She was protective, of course, but from what Ragnar told her, most mothers were, especially of their daughters.

"There is something I have been wanting to tell someone, but I don't know the right person to tell," Tova confessed and Siggy turned to her.

"What is it, Tova?" She had asked her daughter, looking almost concerned.

"I..." She trailed off, letting out a large sigh as she looked down at the ground, "I think I'm in love with Bjorn."

She lifted her head, frowning when she saw Siggy smiling knowingly. "Is it that obvious?"

"Very much so. You act as though it doesn't bother you that Bjorn is with Porunn but it is so obvious that you are. Bjorn thinks you are just being friendly every time you ask about him and Porunn but in truth, it is because you are jealous. He is just too foolish to see it," She explained with a large smile on her face.

"What do I do?" Tova asked, looking concerned.

"That is to be your decision, not mine, Tova," Siggy reminded her and Tova sighed in defeat.

"Should I tell him that I love him?" Tova questioned as she looked uneasy.

"I'd say wait a while. Not just yet. But perhaps soon, before it is too late," Siggy suggested and Tova smiled at the woman thankfully.

____

At the Great Hall, Ragnar spotted Tova standing near the door, looking outside. He sighed, just before making his way over to his daughter. "What is troubling you?"

"Nothing," Tova replied softly as she shook her head.

"It is not nothing. You are my daughter, Tova," Ragnar reminded the girl as he gave her a knowing look, "I know you better than you think I do. So what is it that's troubling you?"

"The Seer says I cannot have children," She admitted and Ragnar scoffed at the revelation.

"You're eighteen years old, Tova. You have your entire life ahead of you. The Seer could be wrong. But do not let this distract from what we have planned for Wessex," He explained, placing a hand on her shoulder, "We shall go together to Wessex. We will lead this army and we find our people some lands to farm in there. We shall do it to together. Wherever you go, I shall go."

"Indeed," Tova replied and smiled at his words.

"It's cold outside, you will freeze. Let us go instead," He encouraged her and Tova nodded, watching as he closed the door.

Tova turned and began to walk toward the fire. She frowned, however, when she found Ragnar directly behind her. She stopped walking and turned to him, an annoyed look on her face. "What are you doing?"

"I am following you," He replied in a calm tone and Tova gave him a weird look.

"Why?" She asked in concern.

"I told you, wherever you go, I shall go," He answered jokingly, causing Tova to groan and roll her eyes while Ragnar laughed in amusement, "How else will I stop you from doing something foolish?"

"It would seem you have me mistaken with Bjorn, Ragnar," Tova remarked and Ragnar hummed in response.

"Hmm. Perhaps I do," Ragnar responded as he agreed with her, causing them both to smile in amusement.

"I heard that," A voice suddenly spoke up, causing the duo to turn to see Bjorn sitting near where they stood.

Tova and Ragnar exchanged a look, both of them immediately beginning to laugh.

____

Moments later, Tova sat with Bjorn, Rollo, and Floki at one of the tables in the Great Hall as Torstein made his way over to them, looking uneasy.

"I have a problem," He informed the group of four in a hushed tone, "Two women. Both claiming to be carrying my child."

"Is it possible?" Bjorn asked, a puzzled look on his face.

Hearing his words, Tova turned to Bjorn and gave him a weird look. And here she thought she was the one clueless when it came to matters regarding sex.

"Why don't you marry both of them?" Rollo suggested in a calm tone, "Take one as a wife and the other as a....concubine?"

"No," Torstein argued as he shook his head in disapproval, "They hate each other. They want to kill each other. Or kill me."

"Hmm," Tova hummed in response, beginning to speak in a sarcastic tone, "That is a bit of a problem."

"Please, just tell me when are we sailing out of here?" Torstein desperately pleaded, an uneasy look on his face.

Tova sighed and exchanged a look with Bjorn. "Soon, I hope. I cannot wait to leave here," She admitted in a calm tone.

Siggy, who was sitting near them, sighed in frustration when she heard Tova's words. She stood up and left the Great Hall, causing Tova to look defeated since she knew it to be her own fault. Siggy didn't want her to go to Wessex, after all. She feared that she would get hurt again.

After all, it had only been less than a month before when she finally was able to walk properly again without a limp.

Tova took a deep breath and after a moment, she stood up. She exchanged a look with the group, just before she left the Great Hall as well.

_____

At their home, Siggy had just returned from buying ingredients to make dinner. She turned, finding Tova standing there. She wore her battle attire, causing Siggy to sigh as she immediately looked away.

"I came here to tell you goodbye," Tova informed her mother in a calm tone as she walked closer to her, "Why will you not let me say goodbye?"

"What do you expect, Tova?" Siggy snapped at Tova with an attitude, "I almost lost you the last time you went to Wessex and now, you are leaving again."

"I am a shieldmaiden. Fighting is what I do," Tova reminded her in a confident tone, "Just because I got hurt last time, it does not mean I will simply give it up altogether. I must keep fighting, no matter what. If I do not, it means I am weak and I refuse to be weak."

"Is that what Ragnar taught you to say?" Siggy complained and Tova sighed in frustration.

She remained silent for a long moment, trying to contain her sadness. "Will you allow me to say goodbye or not?" She asked in a soft whisper, "I do not wish to leave for Wessex while my mother is angry with me."

Siggy sighed at Tova's words. She immediately walked over to her daughter, a saddened look on her face. She placed her hands on the sides of Tova's face and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "The gods are with you, my daughter, but try not to die out there. I do not want to lose you," She whispered to her and Tova smiled, nodding her head.

"You won't. I promise," She assured her and Siggy wasted no time hugging her.

_____

The morning they were leaving, Tova was standing on the same boat as Bjorn, in the middle of helping the others pack everything they needed for their journey to Wessex.

A horn blared and it wasn't long before Floki ran over, looking to be in a hurry. "Rollo! Bjorn! You cannot understand. I'm so happy. I'm so happy we're leaving," He confessed before making his way over to Tova. He giggled and hugged the girl, just before turning to Rollo.

"Believe me, Floki, I understand completely," Rollo commented, turning to glance at Siggy from afar.

Tova looked over at Torstein, watching how he uneasily glanced between the two women who carried his children. She chuckled, shaking her head at the sight.

"What have I told you, Torstein? Always keep that ax in your pants if you want to avoid troubles," Floki commented and Tova couldn't help but laugh.

"Well, some of us have to bring our troubles with us," Bjorn remarked, glancing at Porunn from afar.

Tova smiled, amused by the sight as well.

It wasn't long before Ragnar walked past them, only to look annoyed by the sight of Porunn. He turned to Bjorn, giving him a scolding look. He sighed in frustration and exchanged a look with Tova, who smiled in amusement.

Bjorn was about to walk past them and follow after Porunn when Tova grabbed his arm. He turned to her, a puzzled look on his face.

"She truly wanted to come with us?" Tova asked Bjorn, a puzzled look on her face.

"I could not stop her," Bjorn replied as he sighed in defeat. He turned and looked down at Tova, a playful smile on his face as leaned closer to her, "She reminds me of someone else I know."

Tova smiled, playfully rolling her eyes as Bjorn nudged her. "Hmm. Not quite," She responded, smiling up at Bjorn, "No offense to her, but I'm far better."

Bjorn laughed, shaking his head as he walked away while Tova smirked.

As Bjorn walked away, Ragnar chuckled and made his way over to Tova. "You make it so obvious."

Tova rolled her eyes and turned to Ragnar, an annoyed look on her face. "Shut up. You love two women at once, women who hate each other."

"You're one to talk," Ragnar retorted, a smile forming on his lips, "Does the whole ordeal with Bjorn and Finnr ring a bell?"

"Finnr is long gone," She complained as she turned away from Ragnar, "He left and never came back."

"Trust me, I know," Ragnar muttered under her breath. However, the moment she heard how he had said it, Tova turned to Ragnar and frowned, "What?"

"What did you do, Ragnar?" Tova asked, staring at him in concern.

"You see, there was something I did not tell you about Finnr leaving," Ragnar admitted, smiling awkwardly as he spoke the words.

"Please tell me you didn't kill him," Tova sighed and Ragnar smiled in response.

"I didn't. Someone else did for me," He informed her without a care in the world, which caused Tova to groan loudly in annoyance.

"Did you really think I'd let him get away with putting his hands on you?" Ragnar complained as he scoffed loudly, "Gods, no. He's lucky a quick death was all he got because if I had gotten his hands on him, it would have been far worse."

Tova sighed in defeat. She turned to glance at Ragnar. She shook her head slightly, just before walking away. Why was she not surprised?