I made up my mind to ignore the messages Cory had sent me. But it was hard. Every time I had a free moment, they came to my mind. I could almost imagine him saying them.

Denise, you need to come back.

No please, just raw authority. I had liked that at some moment but I wasn't sure that was what I liked anymore. And I wasn't sure that I had actually liked it.

Of course I still had feelings for Cory. They were slowly disappearing but they were still there. Fabian had helped a lot with that, but I found myself comparing both of them sometimes. Something I knew was completely wrong.

I sighed and lay my head on the cash register. Just when I was falling into a semblance of normalcy, this happened.

Why couldn't Cory have texted me before I met Fabian, or when I still despised him. Why now, when I had finally contemplating the possibility of opening up to Fabian.

And he had the audacity to tell me I was right. After what he had done, thrown me out of a home I had always known because I had told him the truth.

I get that he's an alpha, as he's as protective as they come over his mate. But he knew my past, I thought he understood me, I thought he had a semblance of feelings for me. Turns out I was wrong.

I let myself think about my rejection from the whole pack for the first time. I had wanted to forget it so bad but Cory's messages brought back all the memories, good and bad. If the good memories even existed.

I began to wonder if all I had experienced with him was real. If all those moments were not just my imagination playing tricks on me. Whether I had not been so far gone in my loneliness that I invented all that to keep myself in some semblance of reality.

"Denise!" I heard and was brought of my reverie. It was Ingrid, she was staring at me worriedly from her own side of the cafe. I knew that I was getting her worried. But I couldn't help it. I had not been able to sleep the whole night, thinking of my past and it was taking a toll on me even now.

Ingrid came to me and put a hand to my forehead. "Are you alright?" she asked and I nodded, sending her a weak smile.

"I'm fine." What else could I say? I knew if I started talking right now, I was going to to burst out crying, and that was the last thing I wanted to happen.

"Are you sure?" she prodded and I nodded again.

"Yeah, I'm fine Ingrid. Drop it, please," I said and I saw immediately that she was hurt. I regretted my words but I really didn't want to talk to anyone right now. Hopefully, I would get the chance to apologise to her later on. But for now, I needed to get out of here.

"I'm– Ingrid, I'm not too well. Can we just close up?" I asked, unable to look at her in the eye.

"You can go up. I'll just stay here till three," she said, looking at me strangely.

"Are you sure?" I asked and she nodded. I hesitated for a moment before leaving. I really wanted to confide in her. But I wasn't sure how to. I trusted Ingrid, but right now I trusted myself more.

I hurriedly went to my apartment and locked the door. As soon as I got in however, my phone started ringing. It was Fabian.

I declined the call after a moment if hesitation. All I needed was a little bit of rest. Just a little bit of rest.

***

I woke up a bit disoriented. Then I remembered snapping at Ingrid and coming up to the apartment to get some rest.

I picked up my phone and saw 5 missed calls from Fabian and about 6 messages from him. I did not click on the thread. As if I did, I would be forced to reply.

Instead, I went to the messages Cory had sent to me. As if it was premeditated, Cory called at that very instant.

I looked at the screen of my phone and before the call could be sent to voicemail, I answered.

I put the phone to my ear without uttering a word. I didn't know what to say and hello seemed like too banal of a word to be used.

"Denise? Dee? Are you there?"

I closed my eyes then said, "I'm here"

"Is it really you?" I rolled my eyes at his stupidly cliche question. And I told him just that.

"That's a really stupid question to ask, Alpha"

"I– Denise– I just want–" I heard his intake of breath then he asked, "How have you been?"

"Cory, what do you want? Why are you calling me after all this while?"

I did not want to beat around the bush. I really was not in the mood to listen to any half assed apology.

"Denise, I know saying I'm sorry will not change anything that happened. I know you resent me. But please, can we meet? Give me a chance to talk to you? Please, Dee." I was surprised to hear him beg. Cory was very authoritative and he gave orders. He didn't beg. He was Alpha, it was to be expected anyways.

"Cory, you just expect me to uproot the life I made here to come and meet you?" I asked incredulously. I was pacing all over my living room. I couldn't sit still.

"I just want to meet you, Denise. I really need to talk to you," he said and I held in a sigh. I wondered what his beta would say if he heard him talking like this.

"Fine Cory. But on my terms and at my place, okay?" I said.

"Thank you Denise," was all he said before telling me bye and hanging up. I threw my phone on the couch carelessly.

Cory's messages had messed up my mind, but his pleas for us to meet had crushed it. I was at a loss of what to do. I had already agreed to meet him. I couldn't just back out suddenly. I wasn't that type of person.

But on the other hand, I was scared to meet him. I was scared that when I saw him, I was going to realize I still loved him and that was going to fuck up a lot of stuff.

Yes, I knew I had feelings for him. But having feelings for someone was not necessarily loving them. And with time those feelings were going to disappear, especially with Fabian now in the picture.

Fabian. I sighed. We had gone on a rocky start, and we were still in a stony patch but he was my second chance mate. And he was one of the most caring people I had met.

I didn't know how exactly mate bonds functioned cause I had realized years ago that what Ethan and I had wasn't real, but with Fabian I felt more alive than I had ever been. I didn't want him to know that. I was scared to let down my guard and get hurt once again. It would be easy and I don't think my poor heart would recover from yet another heart break.

I sagged on the carpeted floor of my living room and put my head in my arms, trying to hide the tears going down my cheeks even though there was no one else but me at home.

It was frustrating. Every time my life seemed like it was going in the positive direction, a setback occured and in this particular instance, I couldn't decide whether the setback was good or bad.

***

I'm sure all of you are like

Fret not guys, I'm perfectly alright 😂😂

Just realized I had neglected this book enough.

I hope you liked this chapter. Vote and comment if you did.

Love, Essie

P.S. how do you imagine each of the characters??