Darkest Hero

So before we get to the story or the Usual Q and A segment I wish to point out a few things:

1: no incest in this story at all. Inko isn't related by marriage, adoption or blood to Lucifer and by extension Charlie so no Izuku and Charlie are not cousins.

2: Mineta is comic relief in hell chapters not in chapters about the happenings on Earth.

3: as this was started before Hazbin Hotel had the art and name updates happen I won't changing Charlie's name or description from earlier chapters as to go back and edit everything with just notepad on my phone is a nightmare.

4: some characters in this are ANCIENT so be aware of that.

Q and A time:

Q: oh God what kind of cosmic entity is Rat Satan?

A: nothing good. Nothing sane. ever changing but always the same.

Q: How the hell did the rabbid dog get out?!

A: probably jumped out the window, that or he ran out the damned door.

Q: Uh, what did the press do to set off the angry chiwawa?

A: nothing asides be themselves.

Q: Oh what the hell is Monoma doing?!

A: thinking he has a chance.

Chapter 34: Before the curtain falls

Aizawa frowned as the vultures known as the press were finally escorted off the grounds by Loona who was being directing by the police and medical personelle who were dealing with the injured and one dead. Bakugo was restrained heavily and was snarling through a gag as he tried to break free. The two officers assigned to put him in the back of the transport van looked about ready to shit themselves.

"Hey what do you make of this?" Vlad asked as he gestured to the cement barrier which look like it had been left of a stormy coastline for the past 100 years rather than being installed no more than 2 years ago.

"Its corroded." Aizawa deadpanned. "None of the press had a quirk that could do that. Hey fuzzball you notice anything?"

"Hold on." Loona snapped as she gave a firm shove to a reporter who was refusing to leave before he turned around and stormed off when threatened with arrest. Loona huffed in agitation, she really hated the press. Crouching next to the ruins of the gate Loona sniffed it before gagging.

"Well?" Aizawa asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Its been rotted away." She explained, rubbing her sensitive nose in pain. "No signs of our lot either before you ask so it's definitely quirk based."

"Great." Power loader muttered.

"Now with All Might known to work here was this an act of some random wacko or a declaration of war." Vlad muttered to himself.

"I don't know and I don't care but they'd better not mess with our students." Aizawa sighed in agitation as he lazily blinked at the press who asides the wounded were now outside the gates.

"I AM HERE TO HELP!" All Might declared loudly as he landed right next to Aizawa making the man cringe at how loud he was and the reaction from the press. "COME ALONG NOW! LEAVE THE PROFESSIONALS TO THEIR JOBS, NOW FOLLOW ME!" He called loudly as he kept the press distracted from what was happening by running down the street, the press keeping pace with the jogging hero.

"His sacrifice won't be forgotten." Aizawa uttered lazily. "Someone get him a mug with chocolates or something."

"I'd offer a discount on the family business but I know the guy is probably on a fast track elsewhere." Loona admitted with a shrug as they watched All Might round the corner, the press hot on his tail. "Got guts to deal with that sort I tell you."

"Like I said, won't be forgotten." Aizawa replied.

"Uh, can we not talk like the guy is dead please?" Power Loader asked bluntly. "Hey Loona think you can let the others know we have things handled here and to send the students to their dorms or home?"

"Meh sure. Don't want to be near the smell of rot any longer than I have to anyway." Loona smirked as she left to inform the 3rd year teachers who were watching over the students. Any excuse to walk around rather than actually do her job was a good one in her book, especially if said excuse involved being on her phone. Admittedly she was still getting use to the human phone Nezu gave her for the job position and she had twice already accidentally started a number with 666 instead of 81 like the Japanese numbers did. Human YouTube was also less violent than Hell's equivilant but atleast there was more variety and less canibalism on it.

[Elsewhere]

Izuku winced slightly as Todoroki applied another block of ice wrapped in a plastic bag from momo to his face.

"The swelling is going down." Todoroki replied simply.

"Thanks Shoto, I owe you one." Izuku chuckled slightly, unaware of the venomous looks Mina was shooting Shoto for being unable to help her crush.

"Pay me in cold soba." The bi colored teen replied bluntly. Izuku sweatdropped. He hadn't known the teen long but all he ever seemed to eat was cold soba.

"Ill see what we have when I can see again." Izuku sweatdropped.

"I do believe I have a baby for this." Mei grinned as she waltzed over to the small group holding what looked like someone strapped wires and glasses to a medieval torture helmet.

"KEEP THAT THING AWAY FROM HIM!" Mina, Momo, Charlie, Vaggie and Ibara hissed at the pinkette.

"It looks like a torture device!" Mina snapped.

"W-WHAT?!" Izuku squeaked in fright as he hugged his arms to the top of his head as it combusted with green flames. He wanted nothing to do with torture devices thank you very much!

"I wouldn't even let you put it on Killjoy, Hatsume so don't even try it on green bean." Vaggie snapped.

"But its perfectly safe!" Mei wined. "It will hurt like hell sure but only for half an day and there's only a 72% chance it would explode! Besides it will get rid of the swelling in like two minutes tops!"

"Uh Hatsume, 72% is pretty high." Izuku gulped.

"No high would be in the upper 90s." Mei waved it off.

"Okay, can we agree to keep her from hurting Izu?" Charlie asked as she gave a flat glare at Mei.

"Yes." Momo nodded as she got ready incase she had to make capture rope to restrain her classmate.

"Alright everybody!" The 3rd year teachers, the pro hero Metal Bat called as he cracked his back lazily. "Those who live on campus head to the dorms, school is cancelled for the rest of the day, those who live off campus head home!"

"Yes, dinner time!" Shinso grinned to himself. "Hey, who's cooking?"

"Jirou and Koda tonight." Izuku replied as Iida once more started to frog march him, this time to the dorms. "Come on Iida let me be!"

"Until such a time as you regain your vision i will escorted you." Iida replied. "I simply cannot allow such a burden to fall on our other classmates."

"Damnit." Mina growled lowly. "I am so gonna leave acid stains on his clothes."

"Get in line." Momo frowned.

"Our boyfriend sure does seem to attract crazy doesn't he?" Charlie chuckled lightly.

"Charls, please do not tempt fate." Vaggie pleaded her girlfriend. "Besides atleast Killjoy isn't after him."

"Please don't even joke about that." Charlie shuddered in revulsion. Killjoy can keep as far way from her boyfriend as physically possible even if it mean jumping off a cliff for all she cared.

[Hell]

Alister groaned in pain as he dragged himself from under a wrecked car. Looking about he counted 8 others for a total of 9 wrecked cars involved in the crash.

"My pants." He moaned.

"Oh don't be a wimp, just a flesh wound." Inko grinned as she casually pulled shards of glass from her arms.

"Its not the cuts I'm worried about, these pants were expensive and I may of just ruined our date my dear." Alister explained with a soft frown, indeed his legs while heavily lacerated were already healing. His pants however were shredded from the knees down. "I look gastly! A no good riff raff unfit to be in your presence! Curse those gawking hooligans who were too busy gawking at us to drive propperly." He bemoaned.

"Oh you." Inko giggled as she waved him off. "You could look like you crawled out of a field of razor wire and landmines and I would still love spending time with you. Come on, I know where we are and I want to see if Jeeper still had his deli open."

"Jeeper as in the Creeper? 21 days and 21 nights every 21 years he has free reign on earth Jeepers?" Alister frowned deeply, showing off his fangs as his shadow grew antlers and static danced around him. "Simply ! I do owe him for what happened back in 1931 in that forrest after all."

"Ah so you're not a natural born Windigo." Inko nodded as she patted Alister's shoulder in sympathy. "Some choices are hard to make and those that do not make it will always be a part of you."

"Please, let's not talk of this." Alister requested softly as he walked off clutching at a small heart shaped locket which hung from his neck. It was old and tarnished with several cracks and scratches across its surface.

"I won't ask who it was dear, I still morn the loss of my current mortal form's grandmother." Inko replied gently as she followed Alister. "She was a kind old lady who worked as a nurse and frankly shortly after I ended up down here I found out she was one of three people within eight years of her death that made it into heaven. I know she would be disgusted with what I truely am but I also know she would be proud of the good I did on earth."

"...Francine." Alister sighed as they stopped in an alleyway littered with old newspapers and the odd rubbish bag. "She was the love of my life before I died. Our love was considered forbidden at the time with me being a white male and her a...a... I can't even use the words those called her." He seethed in anger. "One night we heard screaming and gun fire from the farm we were staying in and that thing, Creeper, he was ripping men to shreds as the barn burnt around them. One of the men escaped and killed Francine, saying it was her fault as a black woman the demon was killing them. Creeper killed them soon after but he didn't take me."

"And with no food you resorted to the unforgivable." Inko uttered softly as she hugged the distraught demon.

"The bastard upstairs wouldn't even let have peace down here, we had but two weeks together after arrival before a purge happened and an angel killed her." Alister was now openly crying, something that sent a demon walking past one end of the alleyway literally shitting themselves in fear before running off, a trail of brown going down their legs. "The love of my life ripped away from me twice first be those KKK pigs then by the winged pricks!"

"Look, I'll cancel the reservation and we can go find a good location to sit and have some wine and calm down from all this?" Inko uttered softly. It was clear while Alister had come to terms with what happened he still blamed himself on some level for failing to protect the woman centuries ago.

"I...I'd like that, thankyou my dear. It's was rather ungentlemanly to break down like that on you or to talk of another woman while on a date." Alister replied as he used a handkerchief to wipe away the tears from his face.

[The next day, Earth]

Izuku yawned tiredly as him and the rest of the class were marched out of the dorms by Iida. Waiting in the parking lot outside the dorms was a bright yellow school bus emblazended with the UA logo. Aizawa merely blinked lazily as he opened the bus door and climbed inside.

"Dude...too early." Mei yawned.

"We have a field trip today and as such we must all be punctual!" Iida retorted. "Everybody line up in seating order at once."

Iida nodded in satisfaction after a few minutes of the tired but quickly waking students organising themselves into their seated order but in lines. With a grin he turned around and stepped onto the bus where Aizawa was already sitting behind the wheel but rugged up in his sleeping bag and sipping a juice pouch. "Its not that kind of bus!"

End.

Thoughts?

Ideas?

Who do you want to see paired with Jirou?