『you took away my brightest star』

Even though he was a ball of sunshine that shined day and night. Even though he was a constant light on dark day. Even though he lights up a room.

I'm glad it was raining at his funeral.

It would be too much if it was sunny. The warmth and brightness that reminds me of him so much, would be like rubbing salt into the open wound.

Maybe the rain brings comfort because I can hide the tears easily. The drops that land on my face merge with the one dripping from my eyes. The cold bring a red glow to my face that hides my sadness. Even though he's gone I'm still hiding things. I promised him I wouldn't. I promised to share my feelings and talk to him. I agreed to what he asked and in return I got the brightest closed eye smile, A contagious laugh and a hug that was too short.

I don't care if I have a reputation to uphold. Screw what others think. Am I not allowed to feel things? I'm I not allowed to mourn a boy I've known since birth?

I scoff at the thought. Keeping my head low facing the ground that at this point seemed much more interesting than the casket being lowered down.

The rain poured harder almost trying to tell us something. All it did was soak my suit and mess with my hair. People did offer me an umbrella but I pushed them away.

My usual spiky hair droops and covers my face. It does well in hiding my angry eyes. Red burning eyes that try desperately to comprehend what's going on. Crimson Eyes that beg for a start over, to go back even just for one day to save the most heroic boy I knew.

No one really knows what happened. He died. That's what we were told. Two simple words that shattered and shook my world- our world. Somehow that's hard for me to believe. A boy that just died wouldn't bring this many questions. It wouldn't bring about an investigation that had the top police and heroes on it. And it certainly wouldn't have brought the fact all might showed up to pay respects to the boy.

A high class person that should have no connection to Izuku, my Izuku. Yet here he stand. All might the most powerful and popular hero, looking devastated. His eyes never leave the coffin for more that a second. His sunken eyes analysis and questions every minor detail. He's so caught up in his own world. It leaves me with questions. Questions that won't get answered.

The boy with split hair looks disheveled. A difference to what I know him to be. His eyes hold heavy bags and his face is deathly Pale. He stands quietly under an umbrella eyebrows knit together. I get a bad gut feeling from him. It seems he's not the only one who is destroyed that Izuku is gone.

How did he know the green haired boy? Well like me, we both knew Izuku well. Why's he here? Simple, I told and invited him. No one needs to know that tho.

As of that stupid hero, "Tch." Not knowing the answers pisses me off and I don't like it.

A few more words are spoken before people start paying respects then heading to Auntie before leaving.

I wait patiently for everyone to leave so I can't be heard. The pro hero kneels down touching the freshly dug dirt. He says something I can't make out before walking towards the group. Next is the half and half boy who also crouches down he lays a single red spider lily on the mound and whispers something I can't hear. He stands walking over to me and placing a hand on my shoulder. "Why?"

That's all he says. He heads for the exit after bowing to the family. I'm finally alone.

"You Damn nerd..."

It comes out broken and soft. An unusual tone for me to use but not unheard of. This deku making me cry. I bet he's getting a kick out of watching me like this. He'll pay when i see him again. Mark my words he'll pay.

When I see him.... No he's not coming back, he gone katsuki. I remind myself shaking my head lightly. I'll never be happy. Not fully not now he's not here. I wish I'd cherish him more. I was a jerk at times but I knew what line not to cross. He would always give me a soft smile when we were alone. His kind eyes would crinkle slightly and his hair bounced. It was a smile I rarely saw. It's like he reserved it for me. It's the smile I'll cherish.

Stupid brain not wanting to let go.

Izuku midoriya is dead.

The league of villains captured him.

Tortured him.

killed him.

Why. Out of all the people in the city they had to take Izuku. The kindest, sweetest, most loving boy. Even after he saved me! Not that I needed saving but I can still vividly remember the last time I hear him say:

"Kacchan!"

I could see Izuku running towards me. What is this nerd doing? He's going to get us both killed. This slime bastard is blocking my airways. Damn it! I can't breathe. Izuku you better turn back now. Before I know it the boy throws something. The nerds note book hits the monsters eye and his grasp loosened.

I gasp at the air as the slime leaves my mouth. I cough and splutter but the damn deku keeps coming.

"Deku run." I shout hoping to get through to the boy. Im scared and angry and My body is aching but I can't let him be hurt. He's quirkless and weak. I don't want to be mean but if that's the only way, so be it. My warning passes by him as he runs faster. My eyes blow wider in panic. I don't want him hurt! Come on come on explosions I need you now.

The mop of green hair starts clawing at the slime near my nose and mouth.

"Deku! You shitty nerd leave!" He freezes tearful eyes looking up at me. "please?" I add seeing the conflict in his eyes. He nods keeping his head down. He doesn't move but he's clearly upset, Spots on the pathway below him go darker. 'He's crying.' I think. I know he cares about me. I do to but still. "Okay kacchan..." the green haired boy says running back off into the crowed. It looks like he's searching for something or someone. But I can't focus on that I take in a deep breath and hold it as The slime villain recovers. "For you deku." I think as my vision spots. The sound fades and my body goes limp.

"Ac-chan kat- Kacchan!" I grown opening my eyes. Deku looks down at me smiling brightly as he sees me. I try sitting up ignoring my bodies protest. "Please be careful! Are you hurt?" He quickly said a checking me over. This nerd. I roll my eyes. "I'm fine!" I snap. Once I see Deku's face my own softens. Ugh this boy making me soft.

"Thanks I guess." I mumble out. The nerd giggles and hugs me very tight. "Deku! Can't breath you baka!" I say hitting his back. He let's go and looks up at me. He spots something in the background and lowers down his head again.

"Ah boys I'm glad to see you safe. Young Bakugo was it? Very impressive quirk you got there. And young midoriya I'm disappointed in you. Without a quirk you could have been killed." All might is talking to us and Deku just looks sad? Angry? He's hiding his emotions from me. He just saved me and he's getting told off? Yeah no that's not right. I thought deku idolised this hero? Why is he cowering?

"Yeah.." another hero pitches in. "Kid your lucky all might saved your friend here and yourself." Deku mumbles out something. He looks sad as he whispers his thoughts. It reminds me of a question I have for him.

"Deku who... who were you looking for?" I ask. He flintches and rushes to his feet. "Oh yes well I guess I did a silly thing but um I tried to save you I guess." His answer is rushed and I see him shaking a little.

"My boy I'm still proud of your bravery!" All might booms out. Deku just walks away towards the police cars. I can barely hear all might, my attention on watching deku. As he gets near the slime villain He says something causing a portal to appears. People freeze and heroes get into a fighting stance. Not knowing what to expect, Everyone is on guard.

Slowly A figure steps out into the day light. They walk over to deku and wrap a hand around his neck leaving a finger hovering.

"Well well, your 'Kacchan' is safe and a deals a deal. Come along pet." Who the hell is this loser? And what's he doing with deku.

After a quick eye contact Deku hangs his head again following after the villain who in turn drags him along. This nerd and lowering his head, has he no self? As if he heard me he lifts his head, it turns briefly looking at me, empty glassy eyes look through me as he's smiling the most sad I've seen him 'I'm sorry it was the only way. I-' he stops mid sentence and quickly dashed through the portal after a harsh push from the villain. "Kacchan! Gomen." He screams out.

No no no. I try reading after him but strong arms hold me back. "Let me go you bastards! I need to save him!" I scream thrashing around.

"Young bakugo it seems you friend was a villain?" All might says snapping back.

I scoff at him. "Like hell he is. Who gets dragged by the neck by their team mate! When no one was trying to save me that nerd went out to find the villains to save me. But hang on isn't that /your/ job?" Sarcasms and anger were laced into my every word.

"Some hero you are!" I can feel my anger burning. "They took Deku and you did NOTHING! They have /my/ Deku! Find him or I will." I say pointing my finger at the mans chest. And with that I walked away.

I can still hear the cry's of Auntie. When I told her, her world was gone, thanks to the heroes. I can remember my plan to save him. I remember working in my bedroom none stop. I searched for days on end barely sleept or ate. I skipped school. And in the end I let the hero's save him. Yet what do I hear when they show up at our door?

"I'm sorry ma'am your son is dead." Auntie dropped to the floor. There's a loud scream that sounds out. full on sobs follow attracting my parents attention.

I asked why? Why was he dead? Why did the heroes not do their jobs again? The only answer we got back was "complications during the mission."

Bull shit! I should have saved him myself. I knew not to trust the heroes and looks what happened.

From that day on I became an even bigger asshole not to my family but to heroes and the people around me. Inko moved in to our guest room leaving all trace of the happy boy behind. I fought for every quirkless person I saw. I was still feared but not by the quirkless.

That day I lost a part of my world.

My brightest star. I was angry but the sadness overwhelmed it. Why did this happen? Who was to blame? Why did the heroes fail?

I was going to become a hero. I will save people like Izuku wanted. I will not let this go unnoticed. I will fix the system from the inside out!

And I will find the truth.

That's a promise.