After everything, Nerluce was finally taken to the infirmary. He was scraped up and had hit his head but it wasn't a concussion as he'd feared. All things considered, he'd been lucky.

He spent a night in the infirmary and then he was sent back to the room. Eko was the only other one who they sent back. Corbett and Hamelin should be released tomorrow - or at least that was what the healers had told Nerluce when he asked - but Lyana and Jurine... they weren't sure yet. Lyana had suffered a serious concussion and lost quite a bit of blood. Jurine... well Jurine had broken both her legs and one of her arms. Worst of all, Jurine hadn't even woken up yet.

But there was nothing that Nerluce could do for them. There was nothing that anyone could do for them that hadn't already been done by the healers. So, Nerluce had left quietly and returned to the empty room. Not knowing what else he should do, he picked up one of his textbooks and sat down at his desk.

He'd missed a day of classes in the infirmary, meaning he was already behind. He needed to start studying now or he'd never be able to catch up again. Besides, there was nothing like reading about how awful people like him were to brighten up his mood. He closed the magical history textbook and picked up the math one instead. He might not understand math but took all of his mental focus to try to.

When Eko entered, Nerluce was writing out math problems and trying to solve them. Eko didn't say anything to Nerluce and in turn, Nerluce didn't say anything to them. There wasn't much to say to one another. They didn't normally talk. Eko didn't normally stay in the room if Jurine wasn't there. But, they went to the place the room shared the textbooks.

Eko frowned at the bookshelf, bending over and looking for one of the books. From where they were looking, Nerluce knew which one.

"I borrowed magical history, sorry," Nerluce said, eyes not leaving the page of math as he lifted the spare textbook he hadn't bothered to put back and offered it to Eko. They accepted it and returned to sit at their futon.

All was quiet for a time. There was just the sound of Nerluce writing on rice paper as he worked through the confusing equations and Eko flipping pages as they read faster than Nerluce could ever hope to read. It wasn't nice. There was a tension in the air. Eko wanted to ask something and Nerluce knew that sooner or later they would. Until then he kept working on math problems and hoping he'd have the answers they were looking for.

"I've been sworn to secrecy," Eko said, finally.

This was not what Nerluce was expecting. He lifted his head, curiously. "What?" he asked.

"The Head Priestess and Taayir summoned me today," Eko said. They didn't lift their head from the magical history textbook. Nerluce could see what page they were on. One with a sketch of a Magickian with a Life affinity bringing thorny plants to life and spearing them through the stomachs of several soldiers. "They swore me to secrecy about everything that happened. No one else will know."

"Oh," Nerluce said. And then he went back to his math problems. "You can tell people if you want. I don't mind it."

Eko paused and the tension became nearly unbearable. Finally, they asked, "Why not?"

A fair question. Nerluce frowned as he tried to figure out why he didn't mind if people knew or not. Certainly, he wouldn't advertise the fact but... rumors would spread regardless. Not even the High Priestess could erase all evidence of that night and gossip caused all news to be as contagious as the plague in the dorms. If Eko wanted, all of Ethera could know by morning. The thought didn't scare him, though.

"I guess... even if everyone was scared of me... if everyone hated me... it wouldn't make much of a difference. I'd keep doing what I've always done." Nerluce offered Eko a smile that he hoped would be reassuring. He wanted to say with that smile what he couldn't with words.

He wasn't... he wasn't evil. His personality hadn't suddenly changed because he discovered this new part of himself. He was still... well he was still Nerluce. And if the world wanted to treat him coldly, then let them. Nerluce had faced much worse odds than a bunch of disciples his own age. If worse came to worse, he'd sic Aristide on them. Aristide didn't like Nerluce but he was always close by and wouldn't tolerate rules being broken, regardless of who was breaking them.

Whether or not Eko saw Nerluce as different or was comforted by his smile at all, Nerluce wasn't sure. They just hummed and flipped the page. "How long have you known?" they asked.

"Since yesterday."

"You're a prodigy."

Nerluce snorted because Eko was right. Nerluce hated that Eko was right. He hated the fact he had been given a gift. It was a sick, horrible gift, given as if to mock him. The gods had heard his prayers to be more like the elder sister Lord Father so loved. And the gods had given him her power but wrong. They'd blessed him to be cruel and controlling. Nerluce felt sick to his stomach.

"Your eyes have changed color too," Eko said. They weren't looking at Nerluce's eyes when they said it but they must've at one point if they'd noticed it.

"Yeah," Nerluce said. "I saw."

It had scared him halfway out of his wits when he did. He'd caught his reflection on something and his head was still aching and spinning and then there had been this white-haired, red-eyed person. A person that was tall and lean. Nerluce saw this person and had flinched so badly he almost fell to the floor. He would have if Taayir hadn't caught him.

Nerluce didn't know what to think of his eyes. On one hand, the change was something he'd been hoping for his entire life. He'd spent the past few months obsessing with his appearance in mirrors. And on the other, the change didn't feel earned. He wanted his eyes to take it back. He didn't want them to be red because he used Life Magick one time. He wanted them to be a marking of his hard work and improvement with the flame.

But now it seemed they'd forever mark his greatest sin.

Eko sighed. "I don't know why you were so obsessed with your eyes."

"I don't know either," Nerluce said, honestly.

"You're a fire Magickian," Eko said, firmly. "You only need to look at your hands to know it." They nodded firmly as if they were saying this to both Nerluce and themselves.

Nerluce smiled but didn't understand. Not until he looked at his hands and realized how long it had been since he'd properly inspected them. He started to chew on the inside of his cheek. His nails were getting long and his fingertips were covered in black ink. He stood up and went to the washbowl, scrubbing at the ink but... it wouldn't come off.

Seriously? Had he stained his skin without even noticing?

Eko laughed. "You didn't even notice did you?" they asked, raising a brow. "You've got ash fingers, Nerluce."

"Oh," Nerluce said. And then, "Oh!"

Ash fingers were a relatively common alteration among Magickians with a fire affinity. The black on his fingertips was a stain but not from any ink. He looked down at his hands, at his fire affinity hands, and he felt a sudden warmth spread through his chest.

So what if he'd made a mistake? So what if he had to live his entire life carrying the weight of his sins in the shade of his eyes? That was no reason to live with a heavy heart. He was a fire Magickian and he would be an even better fire Magickian than Coam. Fire was a powerful element and one day, Nerluce was sure that the red flames would eat away the red of roses and sin.

Things were going to get better.

___

Things did not get better.

Nerluce was with Lyana, sitting by her bedside, when it happened. They were in a good mood because Lyana was expected to be released either tomorrow or the day after. The healers had given Lyana permission to get up and stretch her legs - under the condition that Nerluce make sure she didn't over exert herself. They were just walking around, talking and trying not too be overly loud.

They weren't meant to overhear it. The halls were relatively empty and all of the healers always hurried back and forth. The door was left open because there was no reason to close it. The voices inside were not hushed because there was no reason to hush them. It was like this in all the room and had Lyana not suddenly stopped, Nerluce doubted he would have even noticed.

"What?" he asked.

Lyana put a finger to her lips and made a sound that was either a hiss or a poor imitation of fast running water. Nerluce looked at her blankly as she pointed to the room nearest them and Nerluce saw what had caught her attention.

The High Priestess was hard to miss. She dressed in a manner that no other person alive did and her split hair would make her recognizable in any clothes. However, it was who she was talking to that made it more interesting. Jurine had woken up the day before but none of them were allowed to visit her yet. Nerluce was hoping that she'd be back in the room again soon. However, Nerluce realized that wasn't happening.

"-too long to heal. I know this is hard to hear but you won't be able to keep up. Your family was notified and you will have to return home."

Jurine didn't say anything.

She was... she was leaving? Jurine was both smart and good with magic. Out of all of them, Nerluce felt she had the best chance of becoming a Seraph, followed by Eko. The High Priestess couldn't seriously be sending her home because of a little fall?

Nerluce and Lyana came close to the door to be able to hear the conversation better. If they hadn't bridged the gap, Nerluce wasn't sure if he would have heard what Jurine said next.

"When will they arrive?" Jurine asked, her voice barely a whisper.

There was no protest. No denial of the High Priestess's words. Jurine had simply accepted things and moved on. Nerluce started to chew on the side of his cheek, silently pleading with Jurine to fight. If he could struggle upstream, then surely someone as talented and intelligent as her could do it as well.

"Tomorrow."

That was too soon.

Another long silence stretched inside of the room. "When did you send them the letter?" Jurine asked.

The High Priestess sighed. "I made it so it was this way. It will be easier for you, if you don't have to say goodbye." There was a motherly gentleness in her tone. "If I could have changed things, believe me, I would have. But that's not how things work. Trust me when I tell you that a thousand years of Sears and none of them could alter what they've Seen."

"I know," Jurine said. Because of course she did. "And you're probably right." Because of course the High Priestess was.

But the thing about Nerluce was, he didn't give a damn. He didn't care what was right. He didn't care that the High Priestess was doing what she thought was best for Jurine. And so what, if it hurt more to say goodbye? That didn't give them the excuse not to say it and live the rest of their lives with that hollow numbness in their chest.

"Nerluce, what are you-" Lyana hissed under her breath as Nerluce opened the door.

Both the Head Priestess and Jurine turned upon hearing his entrance and they both looked equally stunned at his appearance. "I'm sorry but I'm a horrible eavesdropper," Nerluce proclaimed as he marched into the room without shame. Lyana followed him more timidly, looking down at her feet as she came, not meeting the High Priestess's gaze.

"Little ones," the Head Priestess said, trying to rid her voice of the surprise. "How full of surprises you are."

"High Priestess I know you don't think it's a good idea, but I believe I was told to come here by the gods to make a very important confession. Do not get mad." Nerluce offered her his most pitiably look.

The High Priestess's expression softened and she nodded before leaving the room.

Jurine let out a dry chuckle. "And what confession must you make? You going to tell me you're in love Nerluce?"

He smiled. "Maybe," he said, honestly. "I think I could have fallen for you if you stayed." Then he let out a long breath and looked down at his friend, wrapped in bandages and flinching every time she moved. "Jurine are you really going to go?"

"I don't see what other choice I have," Jurine said.

"We could help you," Lyana chimed in. "I could teach you magic and Nerluce could teach you academics." She shifted back and forth. "Jurine, I've never had very many friends before. I don't want you to go."

"Me neither," Nerluce said.

Jurine smiled and shook her head. "You must've heard what the High Priestess said. Three of my limbs are mangled. I know the High Priestess was trying to put it nicely saying I'd fall behind in my studies, but I know she meant that I wasn't going to be a good enough soldier. I won't be able to fight with my body like this."

"Don't say that," Lyana protested. "I was born without legs but look at me now! Technology is always getting better. You never know..."

But Jurine did know. "Lyana, I'm not like you," she said. "You're... the most powerful Magickian of our generation. Ethera isn't going to use their coin to fix my body. It isn't worth the investment. I don't even think my family will be able to afford it..."

The statement hung as the three of them looked at one another in a sorrowful silence. The world was cruel and unfair. Jurine's body could be fixed and she could be as powerful as any other Magickian in the world but... she wouldn't be because it was too expensive. It wasn't fair. Nerluce clenched his fists and gnawed on his cheek but there was no solution to this problem.

It had been Seen and once an event was Seen there was no Magick strong enough to change fate.

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