You stepped into the large space, your chest tight.

It was two weeks later, and you had just arrived at Lin's and Evy's engagement party, doing your best to keep a neutral expression.

They had rented out a large ballroom and filled it with decorations, food, a live band, and hundreds of people. How were there so many people?

You felt relief flood you when you spotted Pippa and Jasmine, and you hurried over to them.

"This is kind of crazy, huh?" You said, looking around. "This nice of a place just for their engagement party."

"Exactly. They should be saving it for their wedding," Pippa agreed.

"Weddings are hella expensive," Jasmine chimed in.

You talked for awhile until Evy suddenly arrived at your side. She was grinning broadly, and you had to admit, she looked beautiful. She had on an expensive black dress, her makeup was done to perfection, and her long, dark chestnut hair flowed down in perfect curls. You, meanwhile, had slipped on the first dress you found in your closet, threw on some mascara, then called it good to go. "Y/N! I'm so glad you could make it!"

It took everything in you to put on a smile. "Me too." You looked around. "This is a really nice place."

"I know, right? Lin wanted something smaller, but I was like, 'you only live once', right? And you only have one engagement party, so why not make it the best it can be?"

"Right," you said weakly.

Evy sighed happily, tapping her ring against her champagne glass. "Everything is just working out. You know, I wasn't sure Lin would say yes when I proposed."

"Really?" You grabbed champagne off of a passing waiter's tray and drank half the glass in one swallow.

"I know, it's so silly to say out loud, but I thought maybe he still had some residual feelings for you or whatever, but he said yes, and I'm so happy!"

You were frozen. Your heart beat loudly in your chest. "Lin had feelings for me?" You squeaked.

"Yeah, he admitted it to me after you almost kissed that one time or whatever." She waved it off. "And sometimes I see the way he looks at you and wonder, you know, 'does he have feelings for my best friend?'" Evy smiled, looking down at her ring. "But I know he loves me, and love is stronger than any stupid little crush."

You bit your bottom lip hard. It doesn't matter now. He's engaged. He's happy. That was months ago that he told her that. His feelings would be totally gone by now. Get. A. Freaking. Grip. "Yeah."

"Well, I should probably go greet our other guests." Evy gave your arm a squeeze, then turned and walked away.

You stood there for a moment, processing what had happened, then downed the rest of your champagne.

You spent most of the night with Pippa and Jasmine, talking and dancing and actually having a good time. Although Evy annoyed the crap out of you, she did know how to throw a good party.

After about an hour, Evy stood on the band's small stage and got everyone's attention by tapping a knife against her glass. "First of all, I would just like to thank you all so much for coming. Lin and I are so glad to have you here."

You glanced at a very nicely dressed Lin, who was standing next to Evy with a practiced smile.

"I'd just like to say that there is nothing on Earth more important than love. Than finding the one person who makes waking up and working and everything worth it." She smiled at Lin and grabbed his hand. "That's what I found in Lin, and that's what we invited you all here this evening to celebrate. So please, enjoy the food and the music!"

Everyone clapped, then went back to their conversations.

You ran into Daveed, who you caught trying to smuggle a plateful of food into Pippa's purse.

You talked to him until the lighting dimmed and the music softened, and people immediately paired up and began swaying to the gentle song.

"Would you like to dance?" Daveed asked, bowing and holding out his hand.

"I would love to." You grabbed it, and he led you into the crowd.

As you were dancing, you couldn't help but look over Daveed's shoulder, where Evy and Lin were dancing closely.

You and Lin suddenly locked eyes, and longing flashed in his eyes, but it was gone so quick that you wondered if you imagined it.

You looked away, refusing to let Lin ruin this sweet moment.

The song ended, and you and Daveed separated, smiling. He always knew how to make you feel better.

"Alright, we'll do one more song for you true romantics out there," the lead singer said, and the band started up another slow love song.

You were about to ask Daveed to dance again when Evy and Lin appeared next to you.

"Hey, guys!" She said with her never ending enthusiasm. "Oh, I have a fun idea! How about a partner swap?"

"Why? Don't you want-"

"Daveed, do you want to dance?" Evy cut you off, turning to Daveed.

"Uh, only if your fiancé doesn't mind," he said a bit uncomfortably.

"Go ahead," Lin said, and Evy squealed then dragged Daveed away. "So." You met Lin's eyes. "You wanna dance?"

You glanced over at Evy and Daveed, then sighed. "Okay."

"Don't get too excited," Lin teased, then showed you to the dance floor.

He rested his hands on your waist, and you rested yours on his shoulders with your elbows bent. You swayed slowly, finding yourselves trapped in each other's gazes.

You couldn't find your words. You didn't even know what to say.

Lin lifted his arm and spun you, and you laughed as he pulled you back in.

"I've missed this," he admitted. "Hanging out with you, I mean."

"We do eight shows a week together, Miranda," you reminded with a small smirk.

"I know, I just mean..." He faded off. "I'm glad you came tonight," he said instead, meeting your eyes.

"Uh, yeah, me too. This is a very fancy place."

"Yeah. Not really my style, but anything for Evy, right?"

You glanced away. "Yeah."

The song ended, and you and Lin pulled apart reluctantly.

"Enjoy the party," Lin said, his fingers lingering on your waist for a moment before shoving his hands in his pockets and walking away.

You found Oak and Leslie and hung out with them for awhile before going over to get food from the large table.

As you made you way over, you happened to pass Lin and Evy, who were dancing very closely together to the upbeat song. She leaned in and kissed him hard, and you found your appetite suddenly gone.

You weaved back through the people and out the French doors that led to a large balcony.

You leaned against the railing, taking a deep breath of the warm night air. You knew eventually you'd get over Lin, that the PDA between him and Evy would become normal and wouldn't bother you, but for now, it made you feel sick to the stomach.

But did you even want that? For Lin and Evy to be together so long that you would just get used to it? That Lin's gaze would no longer give you butterflies, that the way Evy looked at him wouldn't make you jealous to your core? You knew you should want that- but you didn't.

"Y/N."

You turned at the familiar voice, and saw Lin standing outside the doors.

"Hey," you said as he walked over next to you. "Shouldn't you be inside hosting?"

He shrugged. "Eh, I think they'll be fine without me."

You both leaned your backs against the railing.

"So how come you came out here?" Lin asked, looking over at you.

"Um..." You and your fiancée were grossing me out- "I just needed some air."

He tilted his head at you. "Are you sure that's it?"

You glanced down. "I don't know." You laughed sadly. "I don't really feel like spilling my guts to my best friend's fiancé." The words sounded weird as they came out of your mouth.

"Oh come on. I was your friend before I was Evy's fiancé. You know you can trust me."

You raised an eyebrow at him. "Fine." You pushed yourself off the railing and turned to face him, done with all of it and three glasses of champagne deep. "I needed air because I saw you and Evy kissing and still, after all these months, it still grosses me out. I hate seeing you two together. I hate it. I hate seeing my best friend and the guy I love together. It's eating me up inside, Lin. I can't sleep. I barely eat. I hate this." Your cheeks were flushed red, and you felt a bit of relief after getting all of that out.

Lin's brown eyes were wide, and his lips were parted in surprise.

A thick silence hung in the air for what felt like eternity but was probably only ten seconds.

"Did- did you say that you love me?"

You felt your cheeks go redder with embarrassment. "N-no," you said unconvincingly.

"You did, you..." He took a step closer, looking into your eyes. "How long have you felt that way?"

"I don't know." You couldn't hold his gaze, so you looked anywhere but at him. "I don't know."

"Y/N-"

"No, please." You shut your eyes in pain for a moment. "Please don't go through the whole thing of saying how much you care about me, what a great friend I am, how much you don't want to hurt me. I already know, Lin, I just- can't hear you say it." You looked back at him, and saw his eyebrows low and his eyes shining.

"I..." He let out a sad chuckle. "That was pretty close," Lin said, taking another step closer, his hands in his pockets. "But you forgot the part where I admit that I love you too, and have for awhile."

Your heart skipped a beat, and shock tore through you. It took you a moment to regain your ability to speak. "You love me?" you breathed.

Lin nodded. "I understand how much harder that makes things, but-"

Unable to take it anymore, you closed the gap and pressed your lips to his desperately. If this could never happen again, if Lin was going to be married off to your best friend and be with her forever, you had to do this now, when you still could.

You were surprised to feel his lips press back against yours without a second of hesitation. He cupped your face and deepened the kiss, pressing himself closer to you.

You dug your hands into his hair, causing it to fall out of the ponytail it was in.

You slowly pulled apart after a minute, your mind fuzzy as you tried to process what had just happened. "I'm-I'm sorry," you said, still not moving away.

"Me too."

Neither of you were.