Victor seemed to have remembered that we had agreed on Puerto Rico but he seemed completely oblivious about the 7th-grade revelation. Yara thought it was another sign that I should confess how I felt. I disagreed. I thought it proved that from the beginning I had stamped myself as unreachable until he enjoyed me as a friend but nothing else. After all, he'd dated half our grade and lusted after Rosalind from far away for near four years.

However, there were slight changes and variations in our behavior. For starters, I noticed that when we sat in the library together our legs intimate pressed against one another. Some days I connected to him from hip to ankle. He seemed unperturbed but on those days I accomplished very little work and I longingly wondered what it would be like if he'd stretch back and rub my back. Like lovers do.

"My uncle can get me a car," he said, biting on the end of his pen. "He has a dealership."

We were in Puerto Rico planning mode and we had agreed on getting a hotel in Condado and split the cost. We were also going to do all the touristy stuff we never got to go otherwise because each time we went with family it was all about visiting family. This would be my first real fun trip to the island, and I was going with Victor. As friends.

"You should come, Yara," I turned to her. She was sitting in the library with us watching us with slick eyes.

"No, thank you." Her little smile made me glare at her. "I'm going to take extra classes to make up. You two have fun."

"We can invite Jon but then splitting the beds –"

"Jon is going with Ray to California, he told me," Yara said and I was beginning to suspect that our friends were purposively keeping themselves busy. "Oh, and Steven is also taking classes this summer."

Yup. They were completely plotting all of this. Victor looked oblivious as he shrugged his shoulders. "We'll still have fun; my cousins know all the great places to party."

"Mine too," I nodded. "I'll call Claudia, her boyfriend is a DJ in Santurce."

We had three weeks left of classes and I felt the pressure of the finals breathing down my neck, but I somehow finished my classes with all A's which granted me my Associates and guaranteed acceptance into Chicago.

"This is Becka's last week, we need to celebrate!" Jon announced.

"Where? Burger King?" Victor scoffed.

"Yes!" Jon said and the three of us agreed to lunch.

When we ambled to Victor's car Jon rushed to grab the front seat.

"That's Becka's seat," Victor said and I froze, more than a little confused even as Jon played it off.

"Yeah, I know," Jon scoffed and opened the door, theatrically offering it to me with a flourish of his hand. "My lady."

I ignored his smirk and slid into the front seat. I noticed Victor was a little down, a little quiet but I also felt blanketed by melancholy. It was all ending. The sand was at its end. Granted, we still had Puerto Rico but this, the college, the three of us, Burger King, was over. As we waited next to one another for Jon to finish ordering and flirting with the cashier I glanced at Victor.

"Last time in this Burger King," I said with a small smile.

He glanced at me and stuffed his hands into his joggers, returning my smile. "I'm sure they'll have Burger King in Chicago."

"Yes, and maybe you can come to visit, we'll hang out and visit Burger King!"

He laughed. "Ok. Sure, I'd like to see Chicago."

This fluttered hope in my stomach. We'd see each other again. This wouldn't be the end; this wouldn't be the final page. When I walked to order Victor stepped next to me.

"She'll have a Whopper Junior, a small side salad with ranch dressing and a small Sprite," he glanced at the menu. "I'll have a regular Whopper, two large fries, that Chicken salad, three bottles of water – oh – and a pie."

I stared at him with an open mouth when he noticed.

"Will that be all?" The cashier asked.

"What?" He asked me.

"You ordered for me," I said.

He shrugged, handing the cashier a crisp $20 bill from his wallet. "You always order the same thing."

I didn't know what to say so I whispered a thank you because his words, his entire act, flooded me. He noticed. He noticed what I ate, what I liked, how I liked it. It was one of those blooming moments when hope bloomed a soft petal against the lining of my stomach.

Maybe I'd kiss him in Puerto Rico.

Maybe.

I almost wished I didn't know him, wished he were a stranger, like Clem or Case so I could test his lips with a kiss and have no repercussions. I couldn't test Victor, he wasn't something to trifle with. This, our friendship, was the most important thing in my life and I would walk a tightrope for the rest of my life if I had to. Even if I had to step aside. I'd be that girl from My Best Friend's Wedding. Smiling at his wedding, truly happy that he had found happiness. Dancing with a handsome gay guy who completed me.

Thank goodness for Jon and his theatrics, he singlehandedly saved lunch, that lovable idiot. By the time we made it back to Victor's car the mood was jovial; Victor turned on the radio and lowered the windows as the music blasted through the speakers.

Enrique Iglesias sang, and we all enjoyed the popular song with Jon popping his head between the two front seats. That's when Victor turned to me and I looked at him. He opened his mouth and started miming the song in the most over the top karaoke manner that made my mouth drop open.

"And now that you're gone, just wanna be with you!"

I flushed and looked away, but laughter and embarrassment burst out of me. Jon thought it was all in good fun and went in on it, but Victor continued, pointing his finger right at my face.

"Stop!" I said, laughing and refusing to look at him.

But Victor didn't stop, it got worse as he pumped his body to the music.

"And I can't go on, I wanna be with you! Wanna be with you!"

The most brilliant smile formed on his face as I laughed, throwing my head back. He saw that as an encouragement, so he began pumping his hips and moving his arms as he drove. The wind blew my hair everywhere, but I didn't care, I had never seen him so carefree, so silly.

"Don't let me down, come to me now, I've got to be with you somehow!"

Jon bounced in the back seat as Victor continued his rendition. The car shook as he kept on and we laughed, living the brightness of youth and possibility. I felt so light and happy, I didn't know if it was because I loved him or I loved this moment or I knew I would remember it in twenty years and smile fondly at it but I was consumed by the importance of it.

And then there was Victor, our eyes met and the entire world stopped, and I swore that at that moment he loved me. Maybe not in the manner I loved him, but he loved me and cherished me. And if Jon had not been there, he would've kissed me.

As the song ended, he pulled up to the school entrance, he had the gym and Jon and I had one final afternoon class. I realized with a pang that it would be the last time I would be in his car; this was our final ride. I missed him so much despite our arms brushing against one another, despite our coming trip, I missed him. Jon got out of the car without another word and I slowly reached down for my bag. Then Victor cleared his throat and I looked at him. His eyes were so soft, and he was biting his lip.

"Thank you for lunch," I said and smiled a little. "And for the serenade."

He nodded. "You're welcome."

I opened the door.

"I'll see you next week?" He was gripping the steering wheel, the muscles of his arms sharp and defined.

"Yeah, let me know if your mom can drive us," I said.

"Ok. Enjoy your week." His voice was soft, and I felt a thickness enter my throat.

I had to leave. Now. Right now, or I swore I would throw myself on him. I stepped out of his car knowing full well that I loved him, even if he didn't love me the way I did. I loved him and it was enough.

Jon was lighting up a cigarette by the time Victor drove away and he gave me a knowing look.

"You got it bad, Becky-girl," he gave me a crooked grin.

"Love is not love if love is one-sided."

Jon looked at me incredulously. "Who the hell said that stupid shit?"

Recommended Year 2000 Playlist (will grow with each chapter)

1. If You're Gone - Matchbox Twenty

2. Absolutely (Story of a Girl) - Nine Days

3. Hanging by a Moment - LifeHouse

4. Yellow - Coldplay

5. Breathe - Faith Hill

6. Smooth - Carlos Santana

7. Country Grammar - Nelly

8. Butterfly - Crazy Town

9. Be with You - Enrique Iglesias