《Blind By Love》31. hurt and pain
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I didn't know how long I cry after coming back to my room while thinking how could Maan do this to me. He support her not me. I know I did wrong but can't he see she was trying to come between us....
"Tsk tsk tsk" i was busy crying when i heard someone's mocking voice and turned to see Ariba were on the doorway. My anger boiled Inside me
"Get hell out of my room!" I yelled but Ariba walked toward me smirking.
"How your feeling now.?" She asked smirk.
"I know what your doing" i said glaring at her.
"Oh! Thank God you know that" she said sighing dramatically. I didn't say anything and look other side.
"Back off hana" she said suddenly after sometime and I look at her confused.
"Stay away from him" she said glaring. I raise my eyebrows.
"From whom I should stay away? Cause as far as I know.. I'm not going after anyone who belongs to you" I said smartly and her face became red due to her rage.
"Rahem belongs to me" she hissed gritting her teeth.
"Oh! But last time I check he's my husband isn't he?" I said putting my finger on my chin. Like I was thinking something hard.
"Don't play hana.. cause in the end you'll lose" she said smirk.
"My love for him never make me lose him" I said confidently smiling.
"Oh really! Is that so? But I thought some 25 30 minutes ago he makes you apologize to me.. am I right?" She asked smirking and I felt hurt and embarrassed. She was right. Maan gave her more important than me but it doesn't mean I was going to satisfy her so I immediately mask a smile.
"He think you as his friend and our guest.. so he doesn't want to disappoint our guest.. that's why he told me to apologise to you cause he knew it's my responsibility to take care of our guest's comfort.. and when I did something stupid then he knew that he has a rights to strict to be with me if I behave like stubborn brat.. afterall I'm his wife" I said proudly smiling making ariba's face's smirked faded away and anger took over. She stare at me for few moments before giving me fake and tight smiled.
"You know what hana... Me and rahem used to date each other.. he really cared for me and always tried to make me feel that I am his love of life...and.." she paused smirking making my heart filled with pain and hurt.
They used to date each other. But Maan told me that she's only his friend... Her voice cut my thoughts.
"And if I was angry or upset he always tried to cheer me up by cooking for me and..." She again paused and smiled shyly.
"A..and?" I found myself asking.
"And kissing me, loving me all nigh..." She was saying but my heart burst out.
"Stop it" I literally screamed at her. My tears started falling shamelessly.
"Why? Can't you bear this? This is truth.. if you don't believe me your free to ask him" she said crossing her arms.
No! That was his past.. she was his past.. he let Ellen go for me.. he will never cheat on me I know.
I assured myself and wipe my tears while looking at her confidently.
"That was all his past.. his present and future... It me and always will be me.. I know he will never cheat me.. now for him your only his friend nothing else" I said confidently.
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"So you think.. for him your more important than me?" She asked raising her eyebrows. And I nodded confidently.
"Yes" I said and she smirk.
"So let's find out who's more important to him" she suggested and I look at her confused.
"What do you mean,?" I asked and she again smirk at me.
"You ask him to take you out.. and I will ask him to take me out.. let's see whom he will take out" Ariba said and I smiled.
"It's obvious that he will take ME out" I said again confidently.
"Let's see" she wink at me smirking and walked out.
Why she's so confident ? As if she already won. I wondered.
★★★★
I was in my room disturb and feeling not so well. I hadn't eaten my breakfast properly and now I was hungry but not feeling to eat anything cause my heart was restless.
After talking to Ariba I sat on my bed and cry for god knows how long and when I calm down I think about ariba's suggestion to know who was more important for Maan cause I wanted to shut Ariba up. I know I was more important to him than ariba but still I wanted to show that to Ariba.
But apart from that my heart ache cause maan didn't came to see me after I ran out off ariba's room crying.
"Doesn't he care about me?"
I mumbled and tear escaped my eyes.
"I care about you" voice came from doorway I turned and look at Maan who was standing on the door.
He walked toward me and stare at me.
"Are you okay?" He asked but I show him my back.
"Angry?" He asked sitting behind me while wrapping his arms around me from behind.
"Don't talk to me" I mumbled pouting.
"Can I breath without talking to you?" He asked kissing my shoulder. My heart skip a beat but I was still angry.
"You can! You said you would have stop talking to me if I didn't apologize to that bitch" I said and wipe my tears
"Baby I'm sorry" he said and I turned to him.
"Don't call me baby" I said pouting and he chuckled.
"Okay Jaan-e-maan.. but that was wrong hanu.. you shouldn't have do that to her.. she's sensitive.. she can't bear spicy things. but my hanu is strong and I knew you will apologize to her if I threatened you.. and I swear i did this because I didn't wanted that to come out of that room. If nawaz bhai and any of our family members came to know they will think you bad girl and I don't want anyone to think my hana as bad girl"
He said and I think about it he was right. If I've not apologize then that Ariba would have complaint about me.
"Okay..but tell me one thing.. if I didn't apologized to her.. then it's true you would've stop talking to me?" I asked my eyes again felt wet.
"Nope! That was just to threaten you" He said winking at me. My eyes grew wide.
"You mean false threaten Maan?" I asked angrily and he nodded.
"Yes.. how can I stop talking to you. Your my entertainment" he said smirking and slapped his arms. While he just laughed in return.
"Come let's go" he said after sometime getting down out of the bed. and held my wrist. I looked at him confused.
"Where?" I asked.
"For Lunch.. you hadn't eaten your breakfast properly and now it's lunch time and everyone is waiting for you" he said but I didn't got up from bed.
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Ariba's voice rang in my ear. And I wanted to prove her she's wrong and for Maan I'm more important.
"I am not hungry" I said and slowly freed my wrist. he raised his eyebrows and crossed his arms.
"Hana why are you behaving like this?" He narrowed his eyes at me.
"Like what?" I didn't wanted but I snap at him.
"Like this.. stubborn and fiesty" he said pointing towards me up and down.
"And why are you behaving like you doesn't care about me?" I asked and tears pool up my eyes. Emotional blackmail. I thought smirking in my head.
"If I don't care then I would've not came here to take you for lunch" he said matter of fact.
I got up from bed and stood in front of him and put my both hands on his folded arms.
"If you care then take me out for dinner tonight" I demanded. He look at me confused.
"Why?" He asked confused
"What do you mean by why? You told me you'll take me on date.. did you forget?" I asked tear escaped my eyes. His eyes soften and he thinks for few seconds before smiling. And cupped my face.
"Meri Jaan I'll take you on date but not today.. please" he said giving me apology look.
"Why?" I asked feeling dejected. He wiped my tears.
"I have some work today.. and I want our date to be best date.. and today I don't have time to plan. but I promise I'll take you on our first date soon and that will be your best day" he promised me and kissed my forehead lovingly. But I'm not in mood to listen no as answer. Again anger took over me.
"Let's go I am hungry" he said while holding my wrist and turned to go. But I unintentionally jerk my hand.
"No! I am not coming! First you promise me that you'll take me out today or else I'll not coming" I said stubbornly he look at me surprised.
"Hana don't be stubborn.. come let's go" he said sternly but I shook my head.
"No! I said no! I'm not coming! First promise me" I yelled and he clenched his fist and jaw. Trying to control his anger.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" He yelled through his gritted teeth.
"Maan please take me..."
"I'm not taking you anywhere" he cut me off rudely and walked out. I stood there crying.
It's okay hana.. if he can't take you then how can he take Ariba.?. he's busy today so there is no way he can take her out over me
I assured myself while cleaning my face and again lay on my bed.
*******
I was shocked to know that hana did this type of prank on ariba. I didn't expect her behaving like this stubborn when I told her to apologise to Ariba. She stubbornly refused to obey me and I didn't like her that behaviour so I threatened her and that worked and she apologized to Ariba but then when she look at me before going with her hurtful gaze I felt my heart ached. But like always I ignored it. After hana walked out of ariba's room I turned to Ariba.
"Ariba again I'm sorry for Hana's behaviour.. she's not like this she's sweet type of girl but I don't know what happened to her" I said rubbing my forehead.
"It's okay rahem" Ariba said smiling. And I wonder how can she changed like this. Ariba was not that type of person who forgive anyone easily.
I was busy in my thoughts when my phone rang I took it out and saw Munaf's call. I received and he told me that his chef wanted to meet me as he tried some new dishes and dessert. for Fathima's wedding. And he wanted me to taste and gave them aprovel if I want that dessert or not.
"Who's call?" Ariba asked. As I hung up the call after confirming that I will meet them at 6pm.
I told her about Munaf and his chef and I was going to taste their some new dishes and dessert.
"Can I come with you ?" She asked and I look at her confused.
"Ariba what will you do there? I am going for..." She cut me off
"For taste some amazing foods and rahem I really want to taste those new foods.. please take me with you.. please please.. pretty please" she cutely pleaded and I couldn't say no to her and agreed.
"But you were not feeling well?" I asked.
"I'm feeling well now.. and if I went out with you then I will be feeling more well" she said smiling. And I nodded.
As I came out of ariba's room I thought to go to check on hana but baba summon me his study room for some work.
After few hours I was free. And mama call all of us for lunch. I sat on my chair and about to take my plate but stop when I saw hana was not there.
"Where's hana?" I asked mama.
"I don't know.. I didn't saw her since morning" mama replied and I know she's still offended with me. I stood up and turned to go.
"Where are you going?" Mama asked.
"I'm going to call hana.. she hadn't eaten breakfast properly" I said concern and saw mama smiling at me and nodded.
As I came to her room I heard her talking to herself. Saying stuff like this I don't care about her and all.
I told her I care about her and she look at me surprised. I went to her and tried to make her understand when she did i held her wrist and asked her to come with me for lunch but she refused and demanded me to take her on a date which brought smiled on my face hearing her cute demand. And my god knows how much I wanted to fulfill her demands but I couldn't. I have to go restaurant today. And it's important fathu wedding was after two weeks and menu hasn't been decided yet.
I told her softly and lovingly that I couldn't take her today but she started showing me her stubbornness. And that make me lose my temper. I don't like when she tried to behave stubborn and show me her tantrums.
I angrily refused her taking anywhere and walked out off her room. But didn't go for lunch cause my appetite was gone.
****
Hana came out of her room as she felt hungry and went to kitchen. She took some rise and started eating like a starving man.
"Hana beta slow" Shabana said in amusement as she saw hana eating hurriedly.
"Mama I'm very hungry" hana said pouting. Shabana smile
"Okay eat.. and drink this juice" she said while taking out juice from fridge and put it infront of hana.
"Aunty" hana and Shabana turned to the voice and saw Ariba standing on the doorway. She was fully ready wearing sleeveless top and jeans. Hana gave her displeased look and again started eating.
"Aunty me and rahem are going out" she said and Hana's head snap toward her.
"Go... going out?" Hana muttered but Ariba heard her and smirk.
"Yeah.. rahem is taking me out" she said and gave hana wink before walking out. Hana felt Ariba just stabbed on her heart. She was staring at her retreating figure with wide and hurtful eyes.
"No he can't take her. She must be laying" hana mumbled under her breath and her eyes filled with tears.
"Hana.. beta are you okay" Shabana stare at her confused. And put her hand on her shoulder but hana stood up hurriedly and ran out from there. While Shabana was stood there confused.
"Maan" hana yelled as she saw Rahman and Ariba was about to sit on the care. Rahmaan look back at her. She ran toward rahmaan and stood in front of him panting.
"Whe...where are you.. go..going?" She asked panting.
"Non of your concern" he replied rudely. He was still angry at her for her previous behaviour. He was about to turn but hana held his arms tightly.
Rahman sighed and look back at her and saw tears rolling down her cheeks. She was staring at rahmaan silently. Waiting for him to say something. After sometime silently looking at each other rahmaan sighed in defeated and decided to tell her about restaurant meeting.
"We going to restaurant fo..." he was saying but hana cut him off.
"Restaurant.... You said your busy today... You don't have time to take me for dinner.. but you have time for her!" hana accused him pointing her finger toward Ariba without looking at her. Rahmaan's blood boiled hearing Hana's accusing Without hearing his side.
"Rahem...it's okay.. if she doesn't want me to go then...." Rahmaan didn't let her finished her sentence.
"No Ariba.. we are going.. and you.." he turned to hana and said "..yes! I don't have time for you cause your not worth it" he said breaking her heart. She froze on her spot and saw them going inside the car and drove off.
She didn't know how long she stood there but when her head started spinning she slowly turned and walked inside the house
**************
I came to my room and locked the door behind me. And lay down on my bed staring at ceiling.
This thought that she's more important than me was killing me inside I felt hurt pain in my heart. I couldn't bear this pain.. I thought I was important but I'm NOT!
'Yes I don't have time for you cause your not worth it'
He's voice echoed in my head and I started crying my heart out.
'You failed me Maan! you failed me!'
Saying this I covered my face with my palm and cried god knows how long and then sleep took over me.
********
I shouldn't have talked to her like that.. I know but she started behaving strange. And I don't like her this behaviour. Now hana wanted to control over me which I hate it. I never thought hana become like this control freak. But who blame her. She's a girl and when boy gave them too much importance they started controlling them. That's why I hated serious relationship. If anyone else were on her place I would've freed myself from her but no.. she's hana, my hana and I couldn't let her go. That thought along make me restless. And I didn't know why.
"Rahem this one is delicious. Taste it" Ariba said. We were sitting on the small table in restaurant and Munaf and his chef served us there special items. But I couldn't bring myself to taste anything. I was too distracted by Hana's tears. Her broken face when I said she's not important for me make me anxiety.
I should go to her and apologies to her. I have to make her realised that she is more important to me than anything.
I thought and nodded.
"Rahem" I heard ariba's irritating voice.
"What Ariba?" I asked harshly.
"Taste it" she said passing me dessert.
"Please you have it.. and if you like this all then we should add this on menu" I said and she nodded.
"Now let's go" I said and stood up
"We can go after dinner" she suggested but I shook my head.
"No.. I want to have my dinner with my wife" I said and she gave me displeased look. Which I don't care.. I just wanted her to know that what hana meant to me.
I started walking toward exit while Ariba follow me and did message to Munaf that I have go and I really like their food and want to added them in wedding menu.
★★★★
As I came home I asked Fathima where is hana.
"She's in her room.. I went to her room and knocked many time but she didn't open the door" fathima replied and I started walking toward her room.
I knocked on the door as I came but she didn't open."hana" I called her but no response.
"Hana open the door" I said loudly and sternly this time knocking on her door. But again hadn't got any response
"Hana I said open the door" again no response. And that make me agitated.
"Hanu... Jaan open the door.. look I am sorry.. please open the door" I couldn't believe I am pleading to a girl. But again this girl make me do stuff and felt which I haven't did before.
"Jaan-e-maan I'm sorry, please open the door.. your scaring me now hanu" I almost begged but that girl didn't response and that make me anxiety.
"Hana open the door damn it!" I yelled banging on the door.
Ya Allah! I hope she's fine!
Again I don't know why but that thought hurting me killing me from inside that hana did something wrong cause she wasn't in her right mind and was looking too hurt by my behaviour.
***********
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