《Helluva Harem》Truth Seekers Pt.2
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[Millie and Loona are seen walking up to a three-by-four 12-digit keypad. Millie walks closer and sees that the 1 button is the only one that shows any wear, while the other buttons are untouched.]
: Try 1.
[Loona presses 1 five times. The door slides open, revealing a reception desk. The girls look to each other in affirmation and run inside. Millie vaults over the desk as the door slams shut behind them.]
[Now that Moxxie's and Blitzo's respective trips have worn off, they slowly wake up. Blitzo glances up to see that the truth gas is no longer being pumped into the room. Both are silent for a moment.]
: Do you remember what you said to me after my first day with the company?
: ...Not really.
: I remember. You told me I did a good job and that you were proud to work with me. I feel like you wanted to say something more judgmental, but... you said that because I needed it... And it helped.
: Look, I'm hard on you, because I know what you're capable of, Mox. You care too much about what everyone thinks except for... me, because, y'know, my opinion is correct, but just... keep doing a good job. 'Kay? You shoot 'n kill good, you escape things easy... you can be strategic and cold-blooded when you need to, aaaand don't expect any more compliments; I'm maxed out.
: Thank you, sir.
: You know my name... Use it.
: Thanks, Blitzo.
Say uhh... Y/n's been really quiet
[Moxxie looks at you, seeing your body occasionally spark with electricity. As more time passes the more you spark.]
I don't think he's ok!
OH SHIT WATCH OUT!
[The electricity burst from your body, frying all electronics nearby. Even the shackles on your hands explode from the power.]
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
WATCH OUT WATCH OUT! WERE RIGHT HERE!
Fucking hell Y/n! WHAT DID YOU SEE!
[You didn't answer, all you did was hug Moxxie and Blitzo]
I'm so glad you guys are safe.
Likewise Y/n.
I still don't know why you came after us.
Cant leave my family behind in this hell hole, I had to do something.
[A muffled pounding comes from the ceiling. Millie crashes through the ceiling, landing with a superhero pose.]
: *excited* THERE'S my Millie!
[Millie runs over to Moxxie and Blitzo and begins to untie them.]
: Impressive work, Mills! How'd you get here all by yourself?
[Millie and Moxxie have a tender reunion but are rudely interrupted when Loona smashes through the one-way window using Agent Two as a makeshift battering ram.]
: LOONIE?!
[You ran over to Loona, picking her up bridal style. You kissed before she pulls away.]
WHAT THE FUCK Y/N!
Don't bother hiding it, he already knows.
WHAT!
Since Spring Break, he even has a photo album of us.
If i wasnt being carried right now i'd kill you right now Blitz.
Sorry Loonie, I just thought you to were adorable.
[You continued to kiss Loona, this time she embraces it and even makes it more passionate. After a couple of seconds you let her down, she had a joyous look on her face before going back to normal.]
: Get your asses out here before MORE FUCKERS SHOW UP!
[Loona throws Agent Two at Agent One as he stands behind her in shock. She crouches, wolf ears sprouting from her head, and leaps, having instantly reverted to her Hellhound form as she lands. A wolf howl is heard as she lands. She drops her backpack and Blitzo and Moxxie grin maniacally at each other. Moxxie pulls out twin submachine guns while Blitzo brandishes his trusty flintlock pistol, flicking the hammer. You then walked over to the bag and saw what you wanted, Your prized AMP. Grabbing it you swung it to open it to is fullest potential. Agent One weakly presses a button, setting off an alarm. The I.M.P group turn as a few disposable mooks drop from the ceiling holding Japanese weapons, before even more cartoonishly slide in from the sides and encircle You. The I.M.P. group hold fighting poses, ready for a smackdown.]
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Ooookay, I've had one too many emotions for today! Guys... Let's fuck these fuckers up!
[Moxxie give an evil, toothy smile and nods. A fluid fight scene starts as one agent attempts to strike Blitzo with the sickle end of his kusarigama, only for Loona to catch it in her mouth and yank hard, throwing the wielder across the room to hit an agent with a katana. A female agent attempts multiple strikes at Loona with her naginata, but Loona deftly dodges and, with the kusarigama sickle still in her mouth, stabs the agent through the throat. She releases the kusarigama and grabs the chain in her hands while running, wrapping it around another agent's neck and yanking hard enough to decapitate both him and the agent with the sickle end in her throat, sending both their heads flying.]
[As the two agents' severed heads fly, Millie jumps and twirls in the air with her axe and goes for an agent wielding a katana. He tries to block but is unsuccessful as the axe easily breaks through his sword and he is cleaved in half, splattering blood and brain matter around her. Millie sees an agent with a two-handed sword running toward her, so she runs up to him and dismembers him in two quick swings. She uses her axe to deflect incoming shuriken and swings at their thrower, but he backflips away as another agent with a sword runs at her. She jumps and flips in the air and lands with a pose, then briefly clashes with the sword-wielding agent before taking off his entire lower half. The shuriken thrower makes a second attempt, but he is easily cut down. She then happily runs off while spinning her axe as the agent she dismembered earlier is seen helplessly flailing his bleeding stumps.]
[Moxxie and Blitzo firing on a multitude of agents coming their way. Blitzo discards his flintlock pistol and reaches for the backpack.]
Mox! Cover me!
Yes, sir!
[Moxxie unloads his submachine guns in a wide arc, before disposing them as Blitzo hands him two golden revolvers that he uses to great effect. Blitzo, meanwhile, pulls out a vicious-looking knife and runs off, stabbing one agent to death while decapitating another.]
EAT! MY! ASS!
[Blitzo pulls out his phone and takes a selfie with the agent's severed head before throwing the head to the ground. Moxxie fires his revolvers until they're spent, then he viciously beats one agent to death with the butt of one before discarding them. Blitzo picks up a demonic pump-action shotgun, fires off a shot, then hands it to Moxxie, who blasts two more agents with it. Blitzo shoulders the backpack so it sits on his chest. He and Moxxie turn to each other and nod before running in opposite directions, Moxxie making a demonic hiss as he does.]
[As Moxxie runs past you, you took on the agents after him. An agent with a kanabo swings wildly at you, as he was recovering from one swing you took your amp and swung at his head. Recoiling in pain, you sweep the agents leg tossing him into the air. You slammed your amp down onto his head hard enough his head splatters onto the floor. Another agent is seen wielding an Ono. She swings at you but you slide under her and caused her to launch into the air]
Loona! CATCH!
[As you stood up from your slide you prepared to swing your amp like a baseball bat. When the timing was just perfect you hit the Axe-wielding agent. Her spine shattering can be heard from the impact. Loona jumps into the air and bites the Agents head, the skull can be heard be crushed.]
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HOME RUN!
[Standing behind Loona was an agent was a man with a fisherman's oar, preparing to strike Loona on the head.]
LOONA, WATCH IT!
[Running to Loona as fast as possible you shoved the agents head between your amp. Jumping around him the Amp caught his neck, Twisting it 360 degrees, before tossing it to another agent. Then a larger agent holding a chigiriki swings at you. You caught his chain in your amp so you brought him closer and jump off him. Untangling the chain you bashed him over the head using force and gravity, his head explode.]
Are you always that athletic?
Maybe...
[As you ran towards a different group of Agents, Blitzo joins Loona. He slithers up into her hair and shoots an agent with a crossbow. One agent swings at her with a sword but she counters with a roundhouse kick to the face. As Blitzo jumps away, Loona turns and delivers a powerful uppercut to the jaw of another sword-wielding agent, sending him into the air. An agent with twin sai comes at her and she crouches down before leaping towards him, biting down so his entire head is in her mouth. She briefly shakes him back and forth before throwing him and grabbing another agent by the face, slamming him to the floor. Blitzo hands her an energy rifle of some sort, which she fires at a few agents]
DIE, MOTHERFUCKERS! [looks down at Blitzo] What?
I am just so damn proud of you, Loonie! [hugs Loona's face and kisses her cheek] Bye, sweetie!
[Blitzo slithers off of Loona, who growls angrily at his affection. She then bites down on another agent's head and throws him.]
[Back to Blitzo. An agent carrying nunchaku runs at him but is blindsided and knocked away by the agent Loona just threw.]
Watch out!
[Blitzo turns to see Millie cut down two more agents with her axe and twirl it with a flourish.]
Hey, Mills!
: Hey, Blitz! Just one sec!
[Millie jumps and swings, decapitating one agent. She cuts a leg off of a female agent holding sai, relieves a male sai-wielding agent of his lower torso, then twirls her axe to completely eviscerate an agent holding a straight sword and poses. Blitzo appears to the side with the backpack still strapped to his chest and offers Millie a pump-action shotgun.]
: Do you need a gun or anything?
: Nah, I'm good!
[Millie spins to the side, taking off the lower legs of a female agent with kusarigama then eviscerating her. She swings her axe as leverage for a leap onto another female agent, wrapping her legs around her neck and decapitating at least two more agents with the axe. Millie severs the leg of the agent she's held onto, who then collapses before Millie begins strangling her with her thighs. Blitzo appears to the side again, this time offering a bottle of water.]
: How about some water?
: Sure!
[Blitzo squeezes the bottle, squirting its contents into her open mouth]
: Ahhh. [snaps the agent's neck] Thanks, Blitz!
: [throws the bottle away] No problemy, Millie-Billie!
[As Millie runs off to murder even more agents, Blitzo pulls out a submachine gun and a shotgun with a sadistic smile and lightly glowing eyes.]
: Now, who wants some quality time with Daddy?
[More agents show up, ready to kill. Blitzo spins his guns, runs at an agent with sai and leaps on him, firing at five agents with his shotgun before blasting the one he's grabbed onto. He leaps off and frontflips, killing two agents with the submachine gun. Once he lands, he pulls a spiked baseball bat out of the backpack strapped to his chest, trips an agent with it, then beats him in the stomach with it. He pulls a grenade out of the backpack and uses the bat to hit it away into a group of hapless agents.]
: FOOOORE!
[The grenade explodes. Agents One and Two attempt to flee the building. Blitzo's grenade explodes, and they duck and cover their heads in fear. They then see the corpse of an agent hit the floor, a femur sticking out where his leg should be and his katana falling down and impaling him in the chest.]
: Good God, Why are we only usin' weapons from Japan's Edo Period?!
: [grabs Agent One by his suit] Hey! The Edo period was badass, and you know it!
: Dammit, you're right.
: LOOK OOOOUT!
[Agent Two pulls Agent One down to the floor down with her as you shoot lightning bolts at more agents. Agents One and Two pull themselves along the floor towards the exit. They are stopped by an agent's freshly severed head landing in front of them, courtesy of Millie. An agent with twin nunchaku runs at her only for limbs and blood to spatter, one nunchaku-wielding arm comically flying up to the ceiling like a helicopter before falling to the floor. The agents turn and pull themselves another way as Loona shakes an agent back and forth in her mouth.]
Moxxie standing on a pile of agents, blasting agent after agent with his shotgun and screaming bloody murder. He flips one agent into the air with his tail, causing him to spin, then he blasts him away. More agents run at him, only for Moxxie to flll them with buckshot.]
: Biiitches!
: *suddenly appears next to Moxxie* Hey, Mox!
[Startled, Moxxie drops his shotgun and it lands on hits buttstock, accidentally going off but hitting an agent in the crotch. The unfortunate agent weakly reaches a hand up at Moxxie.]
: Ohhh, wow. Really goin' for the dick there, ain't'cha?
: *weakly* Help...
: Here, I got it for ya.
[Blitzo takes out the knife he used earlier and stabs the agent.]
: Now, hold this.
[Blitzo places the backpack in Moxxie's arms and pulls from it a comically oversized Battery appropriately named "MY DICK".]
What the fuck? What the hell is this for? Where's the rocket launcher?
That's for Y/n. Y/N YOU READY TO TEST IF YOUR IDEA WORKS!?!?!
LETS DO IT!
[You ran over quickly to Moxxie. Standing over the battery you grabbed both terminals. Feeling a strong current through your body, electricity covers you. After draining the battery dry, you stretched feeling invigorated.]
HOLY SHIT I FEEL GOOD!!!
Great...great...HOW DOES THAT HELP US!!!
[Testing something out, you lobbed a ball of electricity.]
Wow....What a waste of a rocket launch-
[The Grenade of electricity explodes on a group of agents on the other side of the broken window, causing both Millie and Loona to flinch away from the flames. Millie's axe is also blown out of her hands by the blast. Moxxie then comes into view.]
: Oh, crumbs! Is everyone okay?
[Blitzo jumps on you.]
WOOOOOO! How's THAT for demon scum?! Y/N IM NEVER DOUBTING YOU EVER AGAIN!
[Agents One and Two are hiding under a desk. Agent Two nods at Agent One, signaling him to hit a red button next to him aptly labeled '"RED BUTTON". This sets off an alarm and causes the room to have a red tint.]
: Oh, shit! C'mon, fam! Let's blow this cocksicle joint!
[Blitzo and Loona run for the exit. Millie hoists Moxxie off the ground and they join the rest of the group.]
: HEY!
[Before they can leave, the doors close in front of them. A set of iron bars lowers in front of the doors, then a garage door closes further down, then a large steel door clamps down, lasers activate outside of it, and bathroom doors close outside of that, the vacancy indicator switching to "Occupied".]
: [to Loona] Quick! The book!
[Loona pulls Stolas' Grimoire out of the backpack and attempts to read it.]
: Shhhit! I can't... I can't read the spell in this light! I can't see dick! *looks around worried*
[Blitzo searches himself for more weapons but comes out empty-handed.]
: Well, shit. Looks like we've milked this weapon tit dry, and now we're out of badassery.
I still got some fight in me!
: Now's not the time to brag Y/n.
[The silhouettes of Agents One and Two slide menacingly into view.]
: Ha! You demons aren't goin' anywhere now! Haaa!
[Before the two agents can do anything, they begin noticing strange happenings around them. The I.M.P. gang's shadows growl and morph into meld into a hideous beast. A screen suddenly turns on flicker, rattling around aggressively before turning off, showing the agents' reflections and the four-eyed silhouette of a certain someone who wasn't there before. The agents are startled as the screen breaks off of the wall and falls at their feet and slide away. Two more screens then break off of the wall while the rest shudder and display static.]
: [from the shadows] Who daaares threaten... my impish little plaything?
: Who said that?!
[The agents look at the floor, where bird-like footprints appear coming towards them. Another monitor bashes Agent One in the face, removing his shades and knocking him to the floor. He turns to look at Agent Two]
: Agent Two?
[Agent Two's head is spasming, her red eyes wide and mouth slack in shock and horror. Around her dead bodies stand up, eyes completely black and empty. Agent Two tries to stop her head spasming with her hands but fails. The black-eyed bodies kneel. Agent One stands back up, his shades returned to his face, and attempts to approach Agent Two. She removes her own shades and her head twists around "The Exorcist" style to look at Agent One. She now has sharp teeth, bloodshot eyes, and her mascara has formed sharp streaks down her cheeks.]
: [speaking with both a British accent and Stolas' voice] What's the matter, demon hunter? Never seen a REAL demon before?
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