I sat on the light blue couch, my laptop on my lap as I did my school work. Elle was sitting right next to me, scrolling through her phone. I was just minding my own business and watched the show when I heard a soft gasp next to me.

I looked over at Elle, her eyes wide, but when she saw me looking at her, she immediately brought her face back to its normal resting face. Wondering what she saw I asked, "What is it?"

She looked at her phone then to me. "Nothing"

"Really. What is it? I want to know"

"It's nothing. Just a new horror movie trailer" She said this quickly, as if she were hiding something.

"Are you sure?"

"Am I sure what?"

"Are you sure it was just a horror movie trailer?"

Her eyes began to soften. "Oh, Alana. I don't know. It could be fake, maybe I'm hallucinating"

"Hallucinating what?"

She turned on her phone then gave it to me. She was on Instagram and it was a series of photos posted by a Shawn update account. The first picture was of Shawn and Camila Cabello sitting outside at a park bench.

"Oh. I don't see what's wrong with this. They're really good friends. I thought you knew that" I looked at her and she had a worried look on her face. I decided to keep on scrolling. The third, and last, picture was of them kissing.

I felt my arm go numb as I dropped Elle's phone on the couch. I looked at Elle, placed my laptop on the coffee table in front of us, and just stared at her. I grabbed her phone again to make sure I was not losing my mind.

I looked at Elle, my heart beating at an unusually fast pace. "I- I don't understand"

"Alana, come here" She outstretched her arms and I scooted towards her, giving her a hug, my face resting on her shoulder.

My mind was still in a state of shock. "I'm so confused. Just last night, he called me telling me how much he loved me and how I shouldn't forget that. Was he just using me all this time? Am I not good enough for him?"

"Shhh" She whispered, brushing a hand through my hair. "It'll be alright. I'm sure it's just a misunderstanding"

I moved back from her hold, breaking the hug. "A misunderstanding? Elle, I know you need glasses but I'm pretty sure that's another girl kissing my boyfriend"

"Maybe you should call him? See what he says?"

I considered her words. Maybe it was a misunderstanding. Maybe he's working on a music video that he forgot to mention to me. I picked up my phone out of my bag that was on the floor, next to the couch. I turned it on and dialed Shawn's number, putting it on speaker.

After about two rings, he picked up. "Hello?" Shawn said, something sounding off with his voice.

"Hey. Just wanted to check up on you. We haven't talked all day"

"Oh. I'm fine. Thanks, honey"

"That's good. What'd you do today"

"Nothing much. Hung out with Brian and them. Pretty chill day"

"And nothing else?"

"Nope. That's pretty much it"

I nodded my head even though he couldn't see me. "That's good. Well, I have to go now. Elle is sleeping over tonight"

"Alright. I love you"

I paused, my breath sharpening. "Yeah. Me too" I hung up the phone before he could reply, then set it down on the table next to my laptop. I looked at the wall in front of me, shocked and in disbelief.

"So" Elle spoke up. "Do you think he cheating?"

My eyes began to water as I said, "Yeah. I think he is"

----------

It's been a couple of hours since I found out that Shawn cheated on me and the realization hit me like a truck. I was now laying on the couch, blankets and pillows surrounding me, while I just stared at the ceiling, never ending tears flowing out of my eyes. Elle went to the store to pick up some things and left me alone to weep.

I thought about everything that had happened leading up to this moment. I met him when I forgot my phone in the arena, we spent the next day together and I showed him around the city. He invited me to his show in Oakland. I went to Canada for his birthday and he asked me to be his girlfriend. He flew all the way to my house before going back on tour just to say 'I love you'. All of these little memories were flooding back into my brain.

All this time we invested in each other suddenly had gone to waste. One minute I was absolutely in love with him and then the next, he's off kissing another girl. I don't think I was good enough for him. After all, I was just a fan since the beginning. He needs someone that understands the pressures of being famous and whatnot. If he wanted to break up with me, he should have just told me before going behind my back.

My thoughts. were interrupted as I heard the front door open and saw Elle coming in with about three bags from the grocery store. "I know you want this" She took out a tub go cookies and creme ice cream from the bag, grabbing a spoon from the drawer in the kitchen, and handed it to me.

"Thanks for everything, Elle. I love you"

"Of course! I love you too"

I took off the lid of the tub, scooping out some of the ice cream and placing it into my mouth. Elle sat down by my legs, rubbing my knee. "You're going tp get through this, Alana"

"I know" I said, a sad smile planted on my face.

I felt a light buzz next to my leg and I looked down to see that Shawn was calling. I looked up at Elle and handed her the phone. "I don't really feel like talking right now"

"Alright" She said, answering and putting the phone on speaker.

"Alana?" I heard Shawn's voice.

"Hey" Elle said. "It's Elle. Alana isn't really in the mood to talk right now"

There was a long pause on his side until he eventually spoke up. "She knows, doesn't she?"

"Yeah. She does. And she's over here sobbing about you. She doesn't deserve the pain you just forced on her, asshole. Just because you're 'Shawn Mendes,' worldwide famous singer/songwriter, does not, and I emphasize DOES NOT, give you the right to mess with my best friend's heart. I hope you're ashamed of yourself" After she said her last words, she hung up the phone and set it down on the coffee table.

"You don't need him in your life" Elle turned towards me.

"I know I don't. I can be and independent wo-" I said, blowing my nose with a tissue. The sun came in at just the right place, making the ring on my left hand sparkle. I brought my hand down in front of me and looked at the promise ring.

"I should give this back, huh?"

"Yeah. Where's the box?" Elle stood up from the couch.

"It's in the jewelry box in my closet" She left to go get the ring's box and I stood up to get a package envelope from one of the cupboard's in the kitchen. I brought it with me to the couch and sat back down. Elle gave the box to me and I opened it. I looked at my hand one last time before taking off the ring and putting it in the box.

It's been a couple of hours since we packed the ring in the envelope and I have just been lying down on the couch, watching some show on my t.v. Elle walked out of the bathroom and picked up the package from the coffee table. "Okay. Alana. We cannot spend all day sulking. Save that for tomorrow. Right now, we should drop off the package at the post office, then go to a club or something"

"You know I don't drink" I argued.

"I know. You don't have to. You just need to get out and stop thinking about him for a couple of hours"

I stood up from the couch, nodding my head. "You're right. I do need to stop thinking about him" I walked to my closet, beginning to sift through my clothes to find a dress. I looked until I brushed my hand on a hoodie. Shawn's 'Lost in Japan' hoodie from tour. The one he left here. I went past it, eventually finding the dress I was looking for. A red, spaghetti strapped dress that was accentuated my waist and flared at the bottom. I put on some black heels and went to the bathroom to curl my hair and do my makeup.

I walked out of my room, Elle already ready, package in hand. "Dang, Alana. You snapped"

I chuckled, grabbing my purse before heading towards the door. We walked out to the driveway and into my car. I sat on the driver's seat and began to start the engine until Elle stopped me. "Are you sure you're okay to drive?"

"Yeah. Of course" I put the key in the slot and turned on the car. The music started playing. "Are bringing out a different kind of me. There's no safety net that's underneath. I'm free. Fallin' all in you"

Elle looked towards my way, then quickly turned down the volume to silence it. "Are you sure you don't want me to drive?"

I looked at her, smiling. "I'm fine. Absolutely fine" Elle put in the address to the club and I turned on engine of the car, driving off.

We got to the club, a lot of the people on the dance floor or near the bar. "I'm going to get a drink" Elle yelled through the blasting music. "Do you want anything?"

"I'm okay" I yelled back. I walked around, trying to find a place to sit while I waited for Elle to order her drink. I finally found a high table near the corner of the room, near the bar so that it was easier for Elle to find me. She came to the table with a tray of pink shots and placed it on the table. I waited for her to sit down and yelled, "I told you I'm not drinking anything"

"I know. This is just in case. I have a feeling th-" She was interrupted by a change in the song and a familiar voice was blasted through the room. "I won't lie to you. I know he's just not right for you"

I looked at her in disbelief. "You have got to be kidding me"

She chuckled, motioning a shot towards me. "Changed your mind?"

I looked at her then to the drink, contemplating. I have never drank anything so I don't know what effects it will have on me. The song's beat dropped and Shawn sang, "Cause I know I can treat you better than he can"

I quickly grabbed a small shot and drank it in one gulp, the alcohol burning my throat. "Why the hell not" I yelled, slamming the glass down on the table.

Around thirty minutes later, I was completely wasted. Elle was on the dance floor dancing with some random dude and I was still sitting at the table, sipping on an alcoholic fruit punch. I was scrolling through my phone when Shawn's caller i.d. popped on to my screen. He has been trying to call me all day but I've just been ignoring them. I decided to answer the call, placing the phone up to my ear.

"Hello?" I heard Shawn say.

"Shawn" I yelled into the phone. "I don't think you can hear me, let me move" I stepped off of the stool, stumbling into the empty bathroom.

"Can you hear me now?" I slurred, sitting on the toilet cover using the wall to keep myself in balance.

"Yeah. Are you alright? You sound a little"

"Drunk" I interrupted him, giggling. "I'm drunkkkkk. Because 'Treat You Better' started playing and I realized that you can't treat me better than he can. Because guess what? You cheated on me. For Camila Cabello" I started laughing. "You know what else is funny? I dropped off my ring at the post office, so now, you should be expecting it in the mail in a couple of days"

Shawn was silent but I continued talking, my brain telling me to keep the words flowing out of my mouth. "I really thought you were the one. You were so good to me for so long. I repeatedly thought that you were going to leave me one day for someone better because I'm literally a nobody. But I guess that's good for me because my prediction was correct"

He stayed silent for a little longer. I broke the silence saying, "Shawn? Mendes. What a nice name. You should talk to me while I'm on the phone with you because I don't think sober Alana is going to talk to you"

He finally took a breath, speaking. "Alana. I am so sorry t-"

"You know what" I interrupted. "I really want some ramen. The same one we had when we were in Japan and we got this tattoo that is now stuck on me forever. Oh! It's still on you too. I guess you can say 'Stuck on You'" I started laughing and this turned into pure sobbing.

"Honey"

"What did I do wrong? Am I not pretty enough? Did I do something to make you mad? I just don't understand. I thought you loved me. I spent all that time, went on online schooling, just for you. And you go behind my back and kiss another girl? Do you understand how much that hurts?"

"I don't know what to say"

"You. Don't have to say anything. I just need to rant to someone. I still love you Shawn Peter Raul Mendes. But I'm going to lie to myself and say I'm not because you obviously don't love me. I'm going to go now and drink my heart away. I think I'm going to throw it all up later. Okay? Okay. Bye!" I hung up the phone after saying this, going back out.