Walking into the party hand in hand was not what I was expecting. Nobody really seemed to care though, so I guess that was good. The party itself seemed like fun in other people's eyes, but in mine I was terrified on the inside. That gut feeling came back ten times stronger and I could tell myself was, "hope for the best and prepare for the worst."

Mateo led us into the kitchen to get drinks, I hope he knows I don't drink. Once we got there he started getting red solo cups, suddenly someone hugged me from behind. I stiffened as I heard a manly chuckle from behind me. I turn around only to see Adam with a goofy grin plastered onto his face. Letting out a sigh of relief I start to laugh.

"You guys made it," he says while still hugging me. I look back at Mateo and see him sending Adam a glare, Adam lets go once he sees Mateo. "Yeah we wouldn't miss it. I heard you throw some great parties." I say as I nudge him with my elbow a little. "Well, I wouldn't say great. But you know." He says while taking a drink from his cup. Mateo and I just laugh at him trying not to sound conceited.

Someone from behind us calls Adam and he tells us he'll come back soon. I turn back to face Mateo and I see him pouring sprite into a cup.

"So what do you want to drink? There's beer and other alcoholic drinks." He mentions while pointing at the alcoholic beverages on the counter. "Actually I don't drink so I'll just take a sprite please." Beaming up at him he just chuckles. "You go it sweetheart."

Once we get our drinks, we make our way to the main area. I start scanning the crowd trying to find Alison anywhere but I can't seem to find her. Just as if she knew I was looking for her, Alison and Alejandro come up to us.

"Wassup Mateo," Alejandro and Mateo do that boy handshake thing while Alison hugs me. "Oh my gosh! Girl you look good!" Alison exclaims while looking at my outfit. I run a hand through my hair and smile at her. "Thanks Ali, love your outfit too!" She's wearing a cream colored dress that almost looks like silk. It stops just above her knee, she paired it with cute heels and jewelry. We talk for a couple more minutes until Alejandro catches her attention.

"Alison, lets go dance for a bit yeah?" She looks at me as if I had to give her approval. I just laugh and push her towards him. I watch them head to the dance floor hand in hand.

"Sweetheart," I look up to see a mischievous grin on Mateo's face. "Lets go dance." Uh oh. I should've prepared myself before this. Here's the thing, I don't know how to dance and I don't want to embarrass us out there. "Mmmm I don't know how to dance." He shakes his head at my reply. "Don't you worry," he bops my nose. "I'll help you." And with that he takes the cup out of my hand, places it at a table nearby and starts leading us to the dance floor.

The flashing lights makes it seem like everyone is in their own world. Most girls are just grinding on their boyfriend or a random guy. I'm not sure if I can do that to Mateo. I look for Alison and once I spot her I'm surprised at how she's dancing. Her back is to Alejandro's chest, his hands are on her hips, their both moving to the beat of the music.

Mateo breaks me from my staring trance as he places his hand on my hips and chest is on my back. I take a deep breath and try to contain my cheeks from heating up but I can't. Thankfully the lights are dimmed enough so Mateo can't see my blush.

"Just follow my lead." He whispers into my ear and it sends a chill down my spine. Slowly, Mateo starts moving my hips to the beat of the music. I place my hands on his and let myself relax onto him. As we continue dancing I start getting more comfortable and let the music flow through me. Feeling a little bold, I move my hands up to his neck and keep them there while we move to the beat of the music.

We dance for what seems like the whole night but eventually we get tired and head back to where we originally were. As the night moves, we spend our time laughing and telling each other jokes. Occasionally, we laugh at the really drunk people trying to walk out the door without falling over.

Forty five minutes later, we're standing by the beer pong table watching Alison and Alejandro go against Adam and this blonde girl. Mateo has his arm wrapped around my shoulder and I'm tucked tightly into his side.

"Drink up, bitchhh," Alison slurs to Adam once she makes the ball inside the cup. We laugh at her comment since she's already drunk. She's having a lot of fun and Alejandro is taking good care of her so I'm not worried about who's taking her home. The game continues on and I look around the room as everyone else is paying attention to the game.

Just as when I first entered, everyone seems to be doing their own thing. Dancing, drinking, talking to their friends. I turn my head to where the front door is and I see a body walking towards our direction. Taking a closer look at the person, my heart drops once I realize who it is. Christopher. That gut feeling returns to my stomach and I start hoping he isn't coming towards us. Turning my focus back onto the game I try not to let it get to me. I'm here to have a good time and if he doesn't notice me it'll be just fine.

My thoughts are completely wrong.

"Well if it isn't my baby sister." Everyone's head turns but mine. I don't want to face him right now in front of all these people. "Oh come on Veronica, don't act like you don't know me now." I feel Mateo look down at me but I'm not brave enough to look up. Everyone seems to have forgotten about the game and are focusing on the interaction that's happening.

He's not going to leave until I say something, so I do the only solution I have. "Go away Christopher." I say firmly as I look up to send him a glare. He just chuckles at what I said. "Now you won't talk to me? Just a few weeks ago you were trying to talk to me. Oh and who's this?" He points at Mateo and I try to hold back the tears that are now stinging my eyes. "It's none of your business Christopher. Now leave me alone and go with your friends."

"Ahh I know who this is." He smiled mischievously. "This is Mateo. The one you said cares so much about you. That's sweet really, I'm surprised he hasn't just fucked you and left." My eyes widened at his statement. As I'm about to reply back to him, someone beats me to it.

"Hey let's calm down a bit, I'm sure Veronica doesn't want any trouble." Adam's voice speaks up from where he stands at the end of the table. Christopher turns his gaze towards Adam and scoffs. "I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to him." He points at Mateo.

"Look man I don't know what you're trying to do here but I'm sure Veronica wants you to leave her alone." Mateo speaks up as he talks to Chris. I unwrap Mateo's arm from around my shoulder and hug myself. I knew something was going to happen. I was stupid enough to come here now I have to face the consequences.

Christopher lets out a throaty laugh and steps closer to me. "I'm sure she can speak for herself." He stares right into my eyes and it feels like he can read my mind. Mateo suddenly steps up and pushes me back with his arm so I'm now standing behind him. "You're drunk, you don't know what you're saying. Leave before you do or say something you regret."

All eyes are on us. The music is still playing in the background at a low volume. I just want to go home and be in bed. I should have never come in the first place. I know how I am in these types of situations. I'm not going to blame Mateo for bringing me, it's my responsibility.

"What do you know about regret? You're just trying to get me to leave so you can get into my sister's pants. By all means go ahead, the way she dressed tonight makes her look like a whore anyway." Everyone starts muttering to each other and I feel more vulnerable than ever.

"You don't get to call her names. You don't get to judge her when you're wasted as fuck. Why don't you go fuck some random bitch here instead of wasting our time." Once Mateo finishes, Christopher turns his head and looks around, he turns back to face Mateo and shoves him back. Immediately Adam gets in between them to stop anything from escalating. I grab Mateo's hand quickly and push through the crowd. I open the front door and start speed walking down the driveway.

"Veronica, why didn't you tell me about your brother?" I ignore his question and continue walking us down the driveway. "Hey, I know you're upset but you gotta talk to me." I don't want to tell him the truth. I'm going to have to tell him about my fear and I'm not ready for that.

"Veronica come-"

"What Mateo?!" I stop and let go of his hand. "What do you want me to tell you? I just got humiliated in front of everyone from school by MY own brother. It's none of your business what's happening between me and him so let's keep it that way." He looks at me with shock. He's never seen me mad before.

"I know you're upset but it's best to talk about it." He says while trying to grab my hand. I take a step back and I feel the tears finally stream down my cheeks.

"NO! You don't get to tell me that when you don't even talk to me. You don't tell me your secrets so why should I tell you mine. You avoid me whenever something happens. You wanted to be friends and ignored me for a week. We almost kissed and you disappeared for a few days only to show up at my house. So why should I talk to you?" I furiously wipe my cheeks trying to get rid of the tears, but I know they're just going to keep coming. He just stood there looking at me. His facial expression is one I can't figure out.

"Look, I know you don't mean the things you're saying because you're mad but-"

"Oh don't pull that shit on me Mateo. I don't want to talk anymore so just please for the love of God take me home." I start walking towards the truck again not bothering to see if he's following behind me.

When Mateo gets to the truck, he unlocks the doors and I quickly get in and wipe my face again. This was such a disaster. How could I let myself talk to him like that. I know he just wants to make me feel better but I really don't want to talk right now.

He starts the truck and drives back to my house. The ride was silent, not a word was said. All that was heard was my occasional sniffle.

Once my house comes into view, I unbuckle myself from the seat and pull open the door. But before I can get off, Mateo grabs a hold of my hand.

"Veronica," he takes a deep breath. "I'm sorry for what happened tonight. I know you don't want to hear this but I'm not going to let you leave without me telling you. I'm sorry I disappeared on you, I'm sorry I don't talk to you at times. I don't mean for that to happen. I want you to know you truly mean something to me okay? And I promise that whenever I'm ready I'll let you in on all my secrets. But for now just like you, I'm not ready to share." I'm speechless. I feel even more guilty now. Why would I yell at him, it wasn't his fault what happened.

Not knowing how to respond, I just squeeze his hand and let go. I get off the truck but before I close the door I look at him.

"Goodnight Mateo." I close the door not wanting to hear a reply. I don't deserve it.

Walking up to the front door I can't stop the tears from falling. I manage to open the door through my blurry vision and close it behind me. Not even bothering to tell my parents I'm home, I walk upstairs to my room as fast as I can.

Closing the door, I grab whatever clothes I have laying around and change into them. Picking up some makeup wipes once I'm done changing, I wipe off the makeup although most of it is already off due to my crying. Tossing the makeup wip into the trash can under my vanity, I make my way towards my bed and slip in.

I continue my crying until I don't have any tears left. How could my brother talk to me like that? Even if he was just drunk that doesn't mean he should've talked to me like that.

How could I have just left Mateo like that? I don't deserve him and he especially doesn't deserve me. I don't know what's going to happen now but what I do know is that I fucked up.

I feel like I lost everyone important now.

I'm alone.