《Uncommon (BWWM)》Chapter 25
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"What's up?" Grace asks, she's sat up facing Arthur who's leaning back on some pillows against the headboard of the bed.
She reaches a hand down to grab his, which he pulls to his lips and kisses, before clasping it in his lap. Grace's head tilts in concern, an encouraging look in her dark eyes.
"You're not breaking up with me, are you?" She jokes, "Because that would be terrible timing."
"No!" Arthur responds, a little to quickly, causing Grace to pout just a bit. He groans, frustrated, squeezing his girlfriend's hand slightly, "It's.." he sighs, "it's not even that serious. It's nothing, really."
"Then why's your face screwed up like you have a hernia?"
Arthur frowns, actively trying to school his expression. The corners of Grace's plump lips curve up into a sly smile.
"Arthur, if it's nothing, then you can just say it. It's obviously important enough for you to be worried about telling me." She tells him, rubbing his palm with her fingertips, "Just say it. Please?"
Grace... God, she means the world to Arthur. Just sitting here, having her look at him like she'd let the whole world burn so they could spend eternity together. He wishes he could have eternity with her. It would be paradise. To feel her soft kiss on his lips and hear her sweet voice in his ears every day.
It's a beautiful dream. But he has to wake up at some point.
"You know how my mother asked if you would be... a suitable bride?" Arthur starts, wincing at the word 'suitable'. Suitable, Arthur scoffs, what does that even mean?
"Um... yes, Arthur, it's unfortunately ingrained into my memory." Grace says, visibly upset by the topic. Tough, Arthur thinks, you need to know the truth.
With a sigh, Arthur continues, "At first, Mum was just spitballing. Suggesting I be with someone hypothetical who could handle royalty." He purses his lips, unsure of how to put this without making Grace sad.
Realistically, there's no way of avoiding that, there's nothing about this conversation that can have a positive outcome.
"Go on..." Grace prompts, eyes narrowed, "I can handle it."
Arthur huffs and pushes on, "Well... I guess... with all the revelations about Rebecca, and the conversation with you... She's decided that Bex is the ideal bride for me."
Silence.
Arthur, who's eyes were previously cast downwards out of cowardice, risks a glance up at Grace's expression.
She's staring to the side, a blank, unreadable expression on her face. The only indication Arthur has that she is even alive is her steady breathing. He watches as her shoulders rise and fall. There is an occasional flare of her nostrils, an observation that Arthur would've found adorable if it weren't for the unfortunate situation they were currently in.
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"I... uh.." Arthur coughs awkwardly, "I said no."
Grace's eyes snap towards him, and she looks at him expectantly.
What did he think would happen? That Grace would blow up? Scream at him? No. They were both way too mature for that. Arthur has always known that about her. He should know better than to assume the worst.
"I said no. That I don't want to be with anyone if it isn't you. That I'm offended by suggestion I choose someone else, let alone a friend of yours."
"She's not my friend." Grace blurts out.
"Yes she is. She cares about you." Arthur argues, bothered by the fact the Grace thinks she's lost a friend.
"How do you know that?"
"I was at her's when my mum made her announcement." He says, then realises how that must have come across, "I mean... I went to tell her off. I had just been with you, and you were so upset and you told me about Bex spying. I-I wanted to give her a piece of my mind, have her explain herself."
"And what did she say?" Grace asks, far too calmly for Arthur's comfort.
"That she was sorry. That she thought she was giving my mum a good impression of you. She says she loves you. And I believe her." Arthur has a sincere look on his face.
Grace stares at him, as if she's trying to gauge the amount of truth in his words.
Her big doe eyes close, and she sighs hopelessly.
"So do I." She says, standing up and walking over to a window. She looks through the glass, at the people going about their lives outside.
It's funny to her, the fact that all these people go on existing without realising there's a prince just feet away from them.
It's not often Grace has a chance to reflect on her life. She doesn't have many 'how did I get here?' moments. This is one of them. She's stood here, in tatty joggers and an oversized t-shirt, debating with herself the pros and cons of marrying into the royal family. It's utterly surreal.
Too surreal.
"Do you agree with her? Your mother?" She says suddenly, turning around and looking at Arthur from across the room.
"About what?" He says, frowning.
"About me not being right for the job."
"I- what?! No!" He splutters, outraged, "Grace, I love you!"
"I didn't ask if you loved me. I know you do." She tells him, "I asked if I was right for the job."
"What 'job'?"
"Of being royalty? Being 'queen'?" Grace says, frustrated, "Your mother thinks the scrutiny will be too much... do you?"
Arthur pauses, opening his mouth then closing it, leaning back slightly, "I... Perhaps. But-"
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"Don't you think someone who grew up like you... High class, rich, media-trained... would they find it easier?"
"I... yes. I suppose so." Arthur agrees reluctantly, already afraid of where this was going.
"And Bex... she grew up like you? Yes?"
Arthur closes his eyes and sighs, "Yes. She did." Then he gets up, rushing over to Grace and taking her hands in his, "But, Sunshine, that doesn't mean-"
"Yes. Arthur. It does." Grace interrupts, pulling her hands away and sitting on the bed, "When I dreamed of my future, this path wasn't even entertained. In my head, I was an astronaut, a ballerina, a Nobel prize winner. But a princess? No. Never. Because it's not something I've ever seen a girl like me become."
"But you can change that?" Arthur argues, pleads, "You can be the exception? The start of something new?"
"What if I don't want that, Arthur?" Grace snaps,"What if I don't want to be the hero? What if I don't want to fight?"
"Grace-"
"I've fought for so long, Arthur." She sighs, her voice laced with emotion, "Why can't anything be easy? I... I don't want the responsibility of being the first one. I just want to be normal."
Arthur frowns. His heart hasn't stopped lurching since their conversation started, and it's only gotten worse. He can't help but guess what's coming.
"What are you saying?" He questions, though he already knows the answer, "That you don't want me?"
"I'll always want you, Arthur." Grace half smiles, looking into his eyes, "But... I don't think I want.. everything else."
"You don't mean that."
"I do... Arthur, I do. I'm not right for you. I won't fit into your life. The royal engagements, the appearances, the banquets. I don't have a place there." She purses her lips, "And I don't have the energy to fight for a seat at the table."
"I don't want this life without you in it, Sunshine." Arthur tells her, his eyes glistening with unshed tears, "I'll give it up. Henry is almost 18, he can take my place-."
"Don't do that, Arthur. Don't act like I'm more important than this. I don't want you giving up your birthright for me."
"Birthright?!" Arthur parrots, standing up frustratedly, causing Grace to follow, "Sunshine, until a few months ago I had no birthright. I don't belong in this life either! I wanted to be normal, to fall in love, and be happy."
"You still can!"
"I can't! Not without you!"
The two of them stare at each other, breathing heavily, daring the other to make a move.
"Tell me," Grace forfeits, breaking their eye contact, "If being with me meant leaving everyone behind, would you?"
Arthur doesn't hesitate, "Yes."
"Really? Even if it meant disappointing them? Your siblings, your father?" She looks him in the eyes, "Your mother. Could you live with yourself?"
"My mother wouldn't..." Arthur starts, then trails off, "I can live with it."
He can't meet Grace's eyes. She has this unsettling ability to peer into his soul. If she does that, she might see the truth.
"Before you met me, you were willing to give up your life, your privacy, your dreams, just do dedicate yourself to the royal family. That's how big your sense of duty is." Grace points out, "I believe that you would drop it all for me... But I don't believe you'd be able to live with the guilt."
The silence that follows is deafening.
She waits for him to say something, to tell her she's wrong. She wants him to tell her she's wrong. But she can feel that he won't. That what she's said has some truth to it.
Grace would run away with him in a heartbeat. He talks as though all she has to do is say the word, and all their dreams would come true. But they won't. Because he'll have left the only family he has left. A family who he loves. A family that Grace knows he's terrified of disappointing.
She doesn't want to be the cause of that disappointment. She doesn't want their relationship to be an eventual source of resentment.
She sighs quietly and looks back up at Arthur. Perhaps this is a bad idea, but it's been two minutes since Arthur last spoke and it doesn't feel like he's going to. Grace needs to decide how to proceed... So she chooses the path of least resistance.
"I'm sorry, Arthur. And I hate myself for doing this-"
"Then don't do it." Arthur interrupts, nothing but pain in his voice.
"I'm doing it so you don't have to." Grace tells him plainly, then continues, "I don't belong with you. You're a future king. A life beside you... isn't a life I'm prepared to lead. You don't deserve a queen who isn't prepared... and I don't deserve the vitriol that being queen could cause."
"Please. Sunshine. I love you so much." Arthur sobs.
"I love you too, Arthur." Grace's voice wobbles and she lets out a stray tear and gets up, heading towards the door to Arthur's flat with the brunet stood in the centre of the room, "But it wouldn't be enough. You know that. I'm not strong. And I refuse to drag you down with me."
Grace opens the door, uttering a simple, "Goodbye, Arthur." Then she gives him one last, lingering glance, filled with pain, regret, and fear all rolled into one.
And then she is gone, and Arthur is alone, on his knees in an empty flat, mourning the loss of the greatest love he'll ever know.
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