Sweat rolls down my face as I wake up in agony. The nightmares come over and over again, especially when it's raining. It is in the middle of the dark, rainy night. I know myself that now I need to distract my thoughts. I roll out of bed, wondering where the hell I am. Realizing I am in my study room, I slowly walk out of there. The house is empty and dark, the two things that scare me the most. I causally turn on my lights, acting like nothing happened.

The maid runs inside and asks, "Do you need something sir?"

I shake my head and reply, "I am just thirsty. Off to bed ma'am."

She bows and runs back inside her room, eyeing my moves. I walk towards the kitchen and jump when lighting and thunder shakes my house. I grab a water bottle and clench onto it. Looking around, seeing the darkness creep again, I drink water and try not to think about it.

Sitting at the dining area, I take my headphones out of my room and listen to music. I open my book and begin reading again. Calculating when thunder would hit, I would raise the volume whenever it does. The book seems intriguing, as it talks about love. I scoff to myself, knowing that this isn't real.

A line in the book catches my attention and I find myself reading it continuously.

"Love is not emotionless. It doesn't have to be involving people..it can occur in life."

I think aloud, "Love is not emotionless. It doesn't have to be involving people..it can occur life. Ha, love my ass."

I know myself that I am finding myself even more colder, and more darker as I continue onto life. But who gives a shit about it. Knowing how my life has been leading as a 26 year old, I know that I won't be happier. I close my book in agitation and throw it across the room. The music seems to strike a fire inside my soul and I find myself getting angry again.

I control it by tossing the headphones aside and drinking more water. My past can't be remembered, nor I want it to. But a weak voice keeps playing in my head, "I need you."

I don't know who this voice is, it sounds seemingly feminine. It gives me the shivers and I ponder over it day and night. My past can't be remembered, I know for sure. Whatever happened, I must have erased it out of my sight. Loneliness is the way for survival, it's in my dictionary. My fingers tap furiously against the wooden table, and I raise my head to look at my reflection. I see a dark, angry man looking at back at me. This young man has a mask and is alone. I don't believe it is me, as he sneers at me.

Right then, thunder hits and he vanishes my from sight. Only my plain self is looking at me, with hatred filled in those eyes. I close my eyes and hear the raindrops hitting the window pane.

I want to say goodbye......

Saying goodbye is the only way for the man to stop sneering at me.....smirking at my flaws.

I'm perfect. I can't be ruined.

But he is succeeded his mission.

The mission of...

Ruining Jeon Wonwoo....

From the inside out.

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