Chapter 3--Lesson Inititated

Riiinnnnng goes the bell, beckoning us to come to lunch. Even though I get straight A’s, am a cheerleader, and participate in various clubs, that doesn’t mean I like lagging after class when I could easily be enjoying the light banter that lunch time brings.

As I’m walking down the hall, I am searching for one black head of hair, but I don’t see him anywhere. I have to admit that I’m nervous about today after school. I envy those girls who get their first kiss in an unexpected manor, but I can’t be like them. I have to know that I’m getting my first kiss after school which only means that the butterflies I woke up with this morning are only multiplying in my stomach by the hour. If they were to cut me open right now, I’d have enough butterflies to fill a whole garden at the zoo.

When I reach the lunch room, I head towards the jock table without a second thought. That’s where all of my friends sit; it just so happens that all my friends happen to be football players and cheerleaders. Generally, you befriend those you spend the most time with. Granted, half of them are complete idiots while the other half of them are complete assholes, leaving only one sweet, honest, true person: Maria.

She got to lunch first today, so she bought us both lunch. I hate when she gets here first because all our food consists of healthy things like salad or tofu. Yuck. I much prefer the days I buy when lunch consists of greasy, yummy in my tummy food. It’s not like either of us needs to eat healthy, especially Maria. She’s a stick. No, she’s thinner than a stick. She’s a twig! I’m sorry if I like my curves that come by eating high amounts of fat and sugar.

“What’s up Amanda?” Johnny asks me from the other side of the table. I didn’t even realize he is sitting there. Oops. Even though he is my boyfriend, I never even notice when he is around until someone points it out. Poor guy, he is so engrossed with me that he doesn’t even realize I could care less about him. We did the brushing of the lips thing that one time at the movies, but I didn’t feel anything so I refused to stay with our lips connected any longer. Now, I may or may not be avoiding his touch like the black plague.

“Nothing much Johnny. How was your weekend?” My heart sinks to a new low as he flashes me the brightest smile I have ever seen. Do I ignore him that much? Maybe I should try harder being his daunting girlfriend. Just wait sweetheart, after today I’ll have my first real kiss out of the way, and we will be free to tango!

“It was okay babe. I missed you though.” The butterflies in my stomach all come to an abrupt stop. The guilt I was feeling before was amplified now because he just said he missed me when I didn’t even give him a single though. No, instead I gave a lap dance to a guy who screamed trouble and agreed to take kissing lessons from so said guy. I believe I just won the worst girlfriend of the year award. He doesn’t deserve this. He is way too sweet for me. That’s why I was telling him that we needed to talk before I even made up the decision to break up with him, but I knew then, when his face fell like I just broke tragic news that I had to break up with him because he is way too good for me.

Johnny and I agreed to meet after school at the local dinner to ‘talk,’ but we both know what is coming. Now, we are sitting in silence and I am just waiting for the words to come out, but I can’t seem to form the right sentences to make this as painless as possible for both of us.

“I want to break up Amanda.” I snapped my head up so fast that I think I might have pulled something because there is serious pain shooting up my neck now. Great, that’ll be fun to deal with while I’m kissing Cameron later. Wait. No. Do not even think about Cameron right now. Think about Johnny. He just said he wanted to break up, but I could have sworn he was in love with me.

“Really?” The hope in my voice was inevitable no matter how hard I tried to hide it. We both know this is what I really want.

“No. Yes. I don’t know.” He takes a deep breath and his brown eyes meet mine. I never realized just how good looking he is before with his buzzed blonde hair and chocolate brown eyes and even though I can’t see them now, I know he has a rocking six pack underneath that loose fitting blue polo.

“Look Amanda, I really like you, but I know you don’t feel the same. As much as I wish you did, I know you never will. I can’t be with someone who doesn’t like me back even if I like her enough for both of us.” With that he gives me a quick smile and stands up.

“I know you asked me here to break up with me Amanda, so I just wanted to beat you to the punch. If I let you do it, we might be here for another couple of hours.” Giving me one last quick smile, he plants a light kiss on my forehead and walks out the diner door.

The relief floods through me as he pulls away in his run down 1972 Chevy truck. He is such a good guy. Starting tomorrow, my mission will be to find him an equally good girl that he can fall madly in love with, and she will love him back. That’s the only way to fix the pain I just caused him because I’m such a heartless wench.

I wanted to like him. I really did, but I just couldn’t bring myself to feel anything for those rich chocolate brown eyes. It’s just that a little boy took my heart a long time ago, and he has yet to give it back. Plus, mom never raised me to be an Indian giver. If you give something to someone, you can’t ask for it back. They have to give it back willingly, and he can’t willingly give me my heart back because he has no idea I’m in love with him. And so the circle keeps on turning.

Glancing at the clock, I realize it is already 4:45. This is bad. Really bad. Being the rudest I have ever been in my life, I run straight out of the door, past the waitress without a second glance. Jumping in my Arcadia, I put the pedal to the metal and head towards the abandoned mill. It’s at least a forty minute drive from the dinner, and I needed to make it in fifteen minutes. The minutes pass quicker than the miles did, and before I know it the clock strikes 5 when I am still a good ten minutes away.

I swear if that clock doesn’t slow down and my speedometer doesn’t speed up, I am going to go crazy! Just as I hit the outer edge of the mill’s property, my phone starts buzzing. I glance about, looking for it, and debate on answering it. I mean, I’m already going 80 mph on this old road: dangerous enough. Then my phone stops vibrating and begins singing “I’m too sexy for my shirt. I’m too sexy for my shirt. I’m so sexy it hurts.” I do not have that ringtone on my phone, or so I thought. Who could that be? Who put that as their ringtone?

While trying to navigate down the mill’s massively long property, my curiosity gets the best of me, and I reach over to my phone and hit speaker.

“Where in the hell are you?!” Even though I have never talked to him on the phone before, I know its Cameron’s anger that is springing from my phone’s speakers. I make one last burst on my speedometer, and I come to a hurtling stop. I can see Cameron’s car near mine, and it’s a miracle I didn’t hit it when I came to my stop. I’m not sure it’s safe to drive like that. If my mom would have seen my driving like that, my cars, yes cars, would have been sold on autotrader.com in the blink of an eye. What mother dearest doesn’t know, won’t hurt her.

“I’m here. I’m here.” I shout into the phone and at him, but it’s not my fault I don’t have my wits about me. I blame him. He shouldn’t be this sexy. His hair is not in its usually perfect curtain around his face. The wind has seen to that. Strands are wrapped around his head, and it looks messy but sexy as hell. Then there are those eyes which I don’t even want to get started on because if I look at them too long I might grow weak in the knees and fall at his feet which would be bad. I let my eyes roam down his face to his perfectly sculpted chest which was impeccably defined under that tight fitting white V-neck.

“You’re late.” One statement brings all those stupid monster butterflies back again, but this time they brought friends and some family members along for the ride. He turns and stomps to the inside of the mill. I scurry in after him and begin o explain.

“I know. I’m really sorry. I just got caught up at the diner with Johnny.” At Johnny’s name, Cameron goes rigid all over, but he keeps walking. Why do I feel the urge to explain why I was with Johnny before meeting him? Finally, we reach his destination, a blanket covered in pillows in a well-lit corner. He throws himself down on the pile, and pats the area next to him.

Unlike him, I don’t just plop down. I gently sit down, trying not to expose everything under my mini skirt. I tried to dress cute today by wearing a mini skirt that showed off the awesome legs I have from cheerleading and a tight fitting shirt with a sparkly design. I thought that I could pair it with some ballet flats and I would look cute, but not like I tied to look cute for him even if I did. Finally I’m situated in a slightly uncomfortable position, but that’s what I get I guess for wearing a short skirt.

“We met to break up in case you were wondering.” I look over at him as a flash of something crosses over his features, but it is gone before I can recognize what the emotion is.

“Are you sure you want to continue with this then? I mean we can just cancel if you don’t want to anymore. I would understand.” He has his face tilted down as he is saying all this. I really want to just crawl in his lap and kiss him all over. This position I’m in is really difficult to face him in. I jump quickly and startle him.

“Stay here, and don’t move. I’ll be RIGHT back!” With that, I run out of the mill and straight to my car. Digging through my gym bag in the back of my car, I find a pair of shorts and slide them on before pulling off my skirt. Not even bothering to lock my car since we are completely secluded out here, I run back in and fall down next to Cameron. His eyes rake over my body with a questioning glance, but if he noticed that I changed he doesn’t say anything; instead, he goes back to looking at his lap like before.

Um, teacher? Aren’t we supposed to be starting my lesson like now? How am I supposed to learn if you don’t initiate something Cameron? Come on. Finally, I realize my mental pleas are useless, since he can’t hear me. What to do, what to do? Should I just kiss him and go from there? Well, I could be a horrible kisser, and that could end badly. He is supposed to be the experienced one here! He should be doing something not sitting there being as useful as a lump on a log!

Being this close to Cameron, it is hard not to tackle him down and have my way with him even though I’m not really sure what my way is exactly. I’m a smart girl though, so I’m sure I could figure it out if he is unwilling to help me out. Our arms are about two inches apart, but I’m still hyper aware of how his body moves even if it is only a minor muscle twitch.

I cannot believe he is just sitting there! I can’t take this anymore because this is on the verge of being riddikulus. We can’t sit here all day! Taking the initiative, I slide up on my knees and crawl my way onto his lap. Once I’m situated, I sit down gently, crossing my legs out to the side while my arms are wrapped around his neck.

“Alright. I got this far. What next Mr. Teacher?” He laughs at me. Actually laughs at me! If he thinks that just because his laugh is one of the sexiest sounds ever that he can get away with laughing at me, he is so wrong. My anger is lost the second his fingers start caressing their way up my leg, landing on my hip which is where they stay.

“First lesson: the art of teasing.” I can do this one. It’ll be just like the other night in his living room. Give him just enough to leave him wanting more. However, even though I know a lot about teasing, I think I’m about to learn a whole hell of a lot more.

Looking directly into Cameron’s eyes, I see how they are twinkling with the excitement of this lesson. I have a feeling I am in way over my head.

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