Thank you @girl_full_of_sarcasm for the cover on the side

It's cold outside again

And we're both so high

Chapter 27 ~ Sofa

Scar Patterson

"Are you just gonna ignore me forever?" The question rolled off my tongue before I could help myself. My fingers enclosed around the steering wheel in a tight grip as I tried to relax my voice, in an effort to soothe Jamie's growing feelings of anger towards me.

I took one glance over at him and saw his jaw was clenched tightly as he stared straight ahead.

I knew he was mad at me. I was mad at myself for not thinking of how this particular revelation would affect him. He was normally an easy-going guy by not getting mad at many things, but this had to have been a big deal if he was ignoring me. "Babe."

He didn't even flinch at my words. It was like his mind had drifted into an unknown place where he couldn't be recovered.

I drummed my fingers against the wheel, contemplating what to say. What could I say? Sorry I gave you the same present I gave Francesca? Sorry that I don't know what to get you because I really don't know that much about you? Sorry that this is my first time dating a boy, so I have no idea what to buy another a dude?

They seemed like plausible excuses to me, but they were just that - excuses.

I knew Jamie wouldn't want to hear any of it, so I did what I could. "Jamie, I'm sorry."

His mouth tightened at the corners. "Stop talking."

I jumped in surprise, not expecting him to give in so quickly. "I'm not going to stop talking. If we're having a fight, then I'm going to do everything in my power to resolve it."

"We're not having a fight," he spat. "I'm trying to enjoy the silence and you're talking too much."

My brows knitted together. "So, you're not mad at me?"

He finally turned to face me and I swear I'd never seen his eyes look so dark before. "Oh, I'm mad at you, but fighting over it won't make you realize how stupid you are for treating me like your goddamn ex-girlfriend."

"What? I'm not treating you like Francesca."

"Really?" He countered with his eyebrows raised at their highest point. "Then please, explain the necklace."

I released a heavy sigh. "What else was I supposed to get you? Diamond earrings? I don't know if you noticed, but shopping for a dude is extremely hard."

Jamie sucked in a frustrated breath and sunk further into his seat, a growing frown forming on his face. "I would've been fine with anything you got me, Scar. The fact that it comes from you and your heart is what makes it special. Not because it's expensive or it's hard to find. Getting me something that you've already given someone else doesn't make me feel special, Scar."

I clenched my jaw. "You are special."

"Prove it," he snapped back. "Prove that you see me as Jamie, your boyfriend, and not Francesca, your ex-girlfriend."

My mouth clamped shut in response. My grip on the wheel tightened and I focused all my attention on the road ahead of me, not wanting to dig a deeper hole for myself. I hated that he was right and I hated myself even more for being so stupid in the first place.

The remaining duration of the drive was filled with dead silence, with neither of us wanting ot make matters worse. Because of this, I expected Jamie to stay in the car once I pulled into the driveway of Trey's three story house - which was still trashed from his New Years' Eve party. Not wanting to break the silence but still curious, I said to him, "You could've stayed in the car, you know."

Jamie folded his arms against his chest and poked the inside of his cheek in irritation. "I could have, but I want to make sure Trey keeps his hands to himself." I opened my mouth to reply, but Jamie snapped his piercing blue eyes to me. "And I am not jealous."

Pressing my lips together into a thin line, I reached out and rang the doorbell. Even from outside, I could hear the chimes echoing throughout the spacious house, bouncing off each wall until someone finally responded by throwing the door open.

When Trey and I locked eyes, his mouth dropped open. His dark umber eyes switched to Jamie, who kept the same expressionless face. "W-what are you doing h-here?" he stammered with widening eyes.

"What? Suddenly I'm not allowed in my best friend's house?" I countered with another question. "What's up?"

Trey squinted at me. "What's up? I don't understand ... Don't you hate me?" His voice heightened at the end of his sentence.

"Hate you?" Nearly a month ago, I wouldn't have known what to think about Trey being gay. Now that I was with Jamie, however, it opened my eyes to new things. "Dude, we've been friends since we were kids. What could you do to make me hate you?"

Jamie cleared his throat, inserting himself into the conversation. "Yeah, what could you do to make him hate you, huh?"

All the color drained from Trey's face. "He knows?"

I took a quick glimpse at Jamie's intense straight face before nodding solemnly. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Trey's gaze remained fixed on Jamie, obviously not comfortable with his presence. "In private?"

A large, sarcastic laugh erupted from Jamie's throat as he unfolded his arms and slowly walked backward. "Touch him, and you die." He finished with a smile and padded his way back to the Jeep. Once he slid into the passenger seat and slammed the door behind him, Trey and I were left in complete silence with nothing but a threshold separating us.

"Do you, uh, want to come inside?" He refused to make eye contact as he spoke, which led me to believe this situation was just as awkward for the both of us.

My response was only a nod as he pushed the door wide and stepped aside, allowing me to step into the narrow foyer. He shut the door after me, causing the hairs on my back to stand up. The last time Trey and I were alone in a room, things took a turn for the worst.

"So..." I let my words trail off as my hands clenched at my sides.

"I'm in love with you," he blurted out suddenly, his words cutting the tangible awkwardness with a sharp knife. "I don't know where it really started, but in eighth grade when we took that class trip to the planetarium, I realized how beautiful you looked. I don't really know why. Maybe it had to do with all the stars and planets and with the way you wore your football uniform wherever we went."

His lips curled into a slight smile as he recovered the memory. "From then on, I started to notice all the other little things you did, like changing your hairstyle or getting a new pair of jeans. I never noticed it before, but I did then."

"It was freshman year when I really knew I was in love with you because you started showing interest in Francesca and it made me really mad. I wanted you to see me like the way you saw her. I wanted you to kiss me and hug me like you did with her. I never told you that because I thought you wouldn't want to be friends anymore. As time went on, I learned to accept the fact that you like girls."

"Until I saw you hanging out with Jamie. I really couldn't understand why you would like him and not me, since we've been friends longer than you've known him. I spent my whole life convincing myself that you were straight but then you fell in love with a boy, and he wasn't me."

I hadn't even realized that my heart was beating rapidly until he stopped talking. I could tell it was lifting a heavy weight from his shoulders, but I just couldn't find the words to say. My best friend was in love with me.

I swallowed a lump in my throat. "Is that why you and Jamie don't get along?"

Trey shrugged. "He's a cool guy, I guess, and he makes you happy which is all that really matters. I just wish I'd be the one to make you happy."

I fell silent again. All those times when Trey boasted about hooking up with a girl, they were never true. An idea sparked in my mind. "What about Francesca?" I asked him.

His eyes widened as though he was disgusted by the subject. "She came onto me, I swear. I would never do that behind your back, boy or girl. I knew it was wrong of me, but I saw how angry it made you so I thought I would play along for a few weeks. That didn't do any good though, because you looked to Jamie for comfort and well, yeah."

I let out a breath I hadn't realized I had been holding. I couldn't describe the way I was feeling. Part of me felt happy that Trey was finally able to open up to me, but the other part of me felt sorry for not realizing earlier.

Trey noticed my silence and spoke up, "Hey, don't ... tell anyone."

"I won't."

He pulled his dark brows together. "You're not grossed out or anything?"

That made me laugh and suddenly, things weren't awkward anymore. "A month ago I would be, but considering that'll be a little hypocritical of me then no, I'm not. This changes nothing between us. You're still my best friend."

Trey let out a sigh of relief as he pushed his baseball hat off his head and plopped down onto the nearest sofa, running a hand through his tight curls. "Awesome. You have no idea how much that means to me."

The corners of my mouth tugged into a small smile. "So it really happened at that class field trip to the planetarium?" I asked, still not believing it.

He nodded. "Yeah. Everyone was mesmerized by the constellations and stuff, but I had my eyes on something else." A smile quickly broke on his face, but he concealed it by glancing down to the floor.

"Constellations," I said under my breath, suddenly remembering. "Hey, how far do you think the planetarium is from here?"

Trey hesitated, then shrugged. "I don't know. Ten minutes?"

Here it was: my chance to prove to Jamie that he wasn't a replacement for Francesca.

I launched towards Trey and wrapped my arms around his neck. "Thanks, man. We'll catch up later, okay?" I had already pulled away from him and was rushing to the door before Trey could return the hug. Once at the front door, I glanced over my shoulder to send him a quick smile and hastily ran out of the house with the cold January air wrapping around me like a coat.

I felt Jamie's questioning gaze on me when I slid into the driver's seat and started up the car with a satisfied smile on my face. "What are you doing?" He asked me.

"You'll find out when we get there."

**

Jamie was thoroughly annoyed with me by the time we arrived at the planetarium. My allusive responses to his prying questions only added onto the preexisting anger he had towards me. If I thought correctly, then this should make him love me again. If not, then I was really screwed.

"What is this place?" He questioned as we approached the entrance of the large dome-shaped building.

I smiled back at him and trailed my hand down the length of his arm to interlock my fingers with his. He retracted his hand as soon as possible and sent me a cold, unfriendly glare while folding his arms against his chest in disapproval.

I suppressed a sigh and continued to advance towards the entrance. I swung the door open and held it open for him, but he didn't mutter as much as a simple thank you. Even when we were inside, he kept his distance from me.

Posters of different constellations, planets, and galaxies were plastered around the room along with small placards that held information about that particular poster. I tapped my fingers on my thigh as I overlooked the lobby, anxiously waiting for Jamie to react.

When he finally caught on to the nature of the lobby, his mouth dropped open. He unfolded his arms from their defensive position, allowing them to hang loose at his sides. He turned to face me with a growing shimmer in his eyes and walked swiftly towards the nearest poster. I watched as he admired the poster and all the information it held and smiled to myself.

I approached the main desk, while taking occasional glances at Jamie who had already gotten into a strong conversation with someone else about a planet.

"How may I help you today, sir?" The older man behind the desk asked me.

I snapped my attention back to him. "Yeah, what time is the next showing?"

"Seating begins in five minutes," he notified me.

"Awesome." I fished out a wad of cash from my back pocket and handed him enough money to pay for the both of us.

The man gave me two tickets in exchange for my money. He smiled at me, but I could tell it was forced. "Enjoy the show."

"Thank you." I stuffed the tickets into my pocket and made my way to where Jamie was standing. I stared blankly at the poster for a few seconds but I still couldn't understand the hype. "What's this?"

"It's the Capricorn constellation," he said quickly, as though he was waiting for me to ask. "And it's also my star sign."

"Oh." I gazed back at the poster, analyzing each star and wondering how they were supposed to connect. "It doesn't look like a capricorn."

"Yes, it does."

"Not really."

Jamie rolled his eyes. "Shut up, Patterson."

I found myself smiling at his interest in this subject. "You really like this stuff, don't you?"

He nodded. "Yeah. Stars are like us, if you think about it. They sit in the sky, do what they're supposed to do, and then one day ... they die and another star comes to take its place."

I glanced back at the poster. "I guess I didn't really think about it like that."

"Of course not," he countered with a smile. "You know, my fifth grade teacher gave me this glow-in-the-dark constellation set. I cherished that thing with my life, but Janice wouldn't let me keep it."

"Why not?"

Jamie sighed. "Because she lives for making everyone's life miserable."

"I'm sorry." Instinctively, I grabbed his hand and weaved my fingers between his. This time, he didn't pull away. "If you're so fascinated by this stuff, why don't you think about becoming an astronomer or something like that?"

He laughed a harsh, almost vicious, noise. "Can you seriously see me as an astronomer?"

I shrugged. "You can be whatever you want to be, Jamie."

His mouth twitched into a sly smirk as he leaned closer to me. "I want to be on my knees," he whispered seductively as he swiped his tongue over his lips, wetting them. A weird, prickling sensation settled between my legs.

I felt the heat rushing to my cheeks. "The show is going to start soon."

He quirked a brow. "Is it?" His voice grew deeper and more raspy.

I noticed an old lady eyeing us suspiciously and as much as I didn't want to, I gently pushed him away from me. "Yes, it is."

Jamie shook his head in disbelief as his smirk turned into a mocking smile. "Let's go, then."

He tugged on my arm and pulled me into the direction of the entrance to the theater section of the planetarium. We handed the usher our tickets and he led us to our seats. We waited as people began to file into the theater and took their seats. About five minutes later, the lights dimmed, leaving us in complete and utter darkness. The screen came to life, projecting an image of the night sky.

I fully expected the presentation to be similar to a movie. It seemed like it at first when the camera dove deeper into the sky, passing all the clouds and immersing itself in the midst of the galaxy. There was no dialogue, just dramatic music that didn't seem necessary. Even though Jamie was completely captivated the presentation, I thought it was completely boring.

Jamie nudged me halfway through the hour-long movie, breaking me out of my quick nap. "Wouldn't it be amazing to fall asleep to this every night?"

It'd be amazing all right. "Yeah," I agreed just to spare Jamie's feelings. "It would be real amazing."

He continued to watch the presentation and I continued to sleep.

When it was over, everyone in the theater clapped - including Jamie. I stood up abruptly, wanting nothing more than to get out of there. "That was so beautiful," Jamie commented, completely breath taken, as we exited the theater.

"Yeah, I liked the part with the stars and stuff."

Jamie gave me a discerning look. "You were asleep the whole time."

"No, I wasn't," I protested.

He raised a skeptical brow.

"Okay, I was," I admitted. "But that's only because I didn't have enough sleep last night."

A smile broke out onto his face as he looped his arm through mine and led us to the parking lot where my Jeep was parked. "Thank you for taking me here," he said as soon as we were both seated inside the car. "I really appreciate it."

As I turned the key into the ignition, I looked at him. His eyes appeared to be more clear and transparent than I've ever seen them. I hadn't realized how much I appreciated the weightless color until now. "It's no problem."

Jamie's hand closed over mine, giving it a slight squeeze. He hesitated for a split second before pressing his lips to mine, slipping his tongue inside. It entwined with mine for a moment, sending my pulse spiraling at an all-time high. Then with a tiny moan, Jamie drew back. "I love you," he whispered softy.

"I love you, too," I replied with a smile.

Jamie returned the smile and sat back in his seat while I backed out of our parking space.

It felt incredibly good to do something that Jamie liked, and not what Francesca liked. Originally, I had thought it would be hard to be with a boy but now, I was starting to realize that I could get used to this whole gay thing.

When we arrived back at the house, the sun had already gone down and the perils of the chilly night had taken over. I was absolutely surprised when I saw that my mom's car wasn't in the driveway. Since Jillian, Jamie and the twins moved in, it gave her a reason to be home more often and sober for longer periods of time. With so many people in the house, rarely would she be left alone to think about dad. That, I think, was a blessing in disguise.

As soon as we rounded the corner of the narrow foyer, we were met with Jillian and her boyfriend, Ake, sitting on the sofa. They were taking turns holding up a water pipe to their mouths and giggling as they did so.

"What the hell?" Jamie shouted at the top of his lungs, making the couple snap their attention to us.

"Hey, dude," Ake slurred while he pushed away stands of black hair falling into his amber eyes.

I could practically feel Jamie snap. "Don't call me that. We are not friends." He charged towards the couple and ripped away the bubbling bong from their hands. "What the hell, Jillian? Since when did you smoke?"

Jillian's blue eyes grew wide as she reached for the bong again. "Aww, don't ruin the fun, big bro."

Ake threw an arm around his girlfriend and pulled her closer to him. "Yeah, man. Don't be a fag."

Jamie clenched his jaw tightly. "Get out," he snapped.

Jillian jumped from the sofa in protest. Any remnant of her suspiciously happy emotion was gone. "Don't be mean, Jamie."

He kept his hard gaze on Ake, seething through closed teeth. "Get out," he spat louder.

Ake rolled his eyes deep into his sockets. "It's okay, Jilly bean." He snatched the bong from Jamie's hands and shuffled towards the front door, but not before sending his girlfriend a quick smile. "I'll call you."