I didn't mean to break your heart

I was just lonely and everybody falls apart

Chapter 26 ~ Everything You Are

Jamie Myers

I've had my fair share of bed partners throughout my entire life. After going through foster home to foster home, I had to share beds with boys, girls, babies, adults, and animals. Each had their own sleeping habits, and each bothered me to the extreme.

But I don't think I've ever been bothered by someone's sleeping habits like the way I was bothered with Scar right now.

Normally, he would wrap his arms around me or nuzzle his face into my neck or something cute like that. Last night, however, he laid completely still in bed, staring at the ceiling with a blank look on his face.

"Did you really not sleep at all?" I questioned as I rolled over to face him while simultaneously wiping the sleep out of my eyes.

He continued to stare at the ceiling fan. "No."

I reached over and twirled a lock of his short, chestnut brown hair around my finger. "Do I want to know why?"

Scar clutched the sheets tighter against him. "I'm so confused."

I couldn't help it. "Well, that's nothing new."

It was obvious that Scar had something on his mind, because he didn't respond to my comeback in the way I thought he would. Instead, he continued to stare at the ceiling like it was the most interesting thing in the world.

I poked him. "Why are you confused?"

His brows pulled together, which was the most emotion I'd gotten from him so far. "I think ... Trey ... Is gay."

Sighing, I turned away from him. I was sick and tired of Trey just showing up and ruining everything. Sure, he may have been sincere with his apology to Scar. Sure, he might have humiliated Scar only because he was too afraid to face his own feelings and sure, he was gay. But that gave him no excuse to treat Scar like shit.

Of course, Scar was too oblivious to everything to see that.

"Hey," Scar called out. "Did you hear what I said?"

I took a deep breath. "Yes, I heard what you said."

"So, what do you think?" He asked me, finally turning to face me. "He, uh, he kissed me last night. I didn't return it, of course. But then he ran away and I swear I'd never seen him run so fast. Do you think he's gay?"

I whipped around to face him again. "He kissed you?"

Scar stared back with at me with a distant look in his eyes. "Yeah, so do you think he's gay?"

How could he just brush past the subject like it wasn't a big deal? "Scar," I said in a stern voice. "You're saying he kissed you?"

He nodded. "Yeah, I just said that."

My gaze narrowed slightly as I sat up abruptly, letting the sheets fall down to my waist. "He kissed you and you didn't rip him a new asshole?"

Scar's scattered brows pulled together into one line. "I don't know what that's supposed to mean."

I slapped a hand on my forehead and lazily dragged it down the rest of my face. Taking the time to collect my thoughts and take a few deep breaths, I tried a different approach. "Why didn't you punch the hell out of him?"

I didn't think it was possible for Scar to look any more confused than he already was, which was one of the reasons why I loved him so much. "Why would I do that?"

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe it's because you have a boyfriend who is getting pretty irritated with the thought of your gay best friend kissing you."

He paused to think it over, with his eyes glancing up to the ceiling again. When he finally came to his miraculous conclusion, he waved a finger in the air. "So, you do think he's gay?"

I opened my mouth to respond, but stopped when I saw him break out into a full grin. He started to chuckle shortly after, which propelled me to grab the nearest pillow and throw it at his head with full force. With almost catlike reflexes, he was able to stop the pillow from hitting his face. He continued to laugh at me and I just shook my head in disbelief, while sinking into the mattress and covering my face with the sheets.

Scar wrapped his hands into the sheets and tugged them away from me. "You're ridiculously hot when you're jealous, Jamie."

I peeked out from under the covers, sending him a deadly glare. "I am not jealous."

My response only made his grin grow wider. He leaned in to my ear and slightly nibbled on my earlobe. "Whatever you say, babe," he whispered in a low, raspy voice filled with desire. His hands soon found their place in my hair, where he tugged and pulled gently, yet hard enough to send me on edge. I wasn't exactly prepared for sexy time in the morning, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't want it.

My hands seemed to have a mind of their own when I grasped the sides of Scar's face to pull him closer and kiss the hell out of him. He eased into the kiss almost immediately and he took his time running his fingers along my chest and stomach, leaving slight shivers in their place.

The kiss turned rough and desperate, like we had been missing each other's lips. Our tongues fused together, each battling for dominance and not wanting to let the other win. Even though I've kissed Scar a million times, I could never get used to the sensation of his soft lips melting with mine, and I was pretty sure he felt the same way based on the way his hands were caressing my body.

I hadn't even noticed that Scar's leg had climbed on top of my own, until I felt our lower halves touch. Because we slept naked, it took away the anticipation and joy of taking off our clothes, but I wasn't complaining. I could already feel myself harden from the brief contact, and I needed to be certain of where we were headed next. "Shit, Scar," I breathed against his lips. "You sure you wanna do this right now?"

He dropped a kiss on my shoulder and began to leave soft kisses on my neck. "Of course I want to," he breathed lustfully. "You're just too hard to resist."

He was halfway through kissing and licking a leisurely path down my torso, when the door slammed open.

"Scar Patterson!" His mom shouted in a reprimanding voice.

Scar hastily tore away from me and ducked under the covers, concealing both of our naked bodies. "Mom!" He yelled from under the sheets. "We're naked!"

I glanced back at Mrs.Patterson to see that her hands were placed on her hips and her delicate brows matched her frown. I could already feel my cheeks getting hot from the embarrassment.

"Jesus, boys!" She yelled at us. "You know the rules. No sexing on school days. Get your lazy asses up and get ready for school. You're giving Amy and Jill a ride today. "

Scar groaned. "Mom! Get out!"

She couldn't have cared less about Scar's pleas. "If I come back in here and see any dicks or butts hanging out, then you guys are sleeping in separate beds." She sent us one last disapproving look before storming out of the room and slamming the door shut.

Scar buried his head into his pillow. "Why does this always happen?" He asked, though his voice sounded distorted because of the pillow.

I gave him a cheeky smile before swinging my legs over the edge of the bed, and standing to my feet. "It's because you always forget to lock the door," I announced as I shuffled over to the nearby dresser and pulled out one of Scar's plain white t-shirts. He had more in the muscular department than I did, which had caused his clothes to fit in a more attractive way than they did on me. However, he insisted that whatever was his was also mine.

When I was fully dressed, I glanced over at Scar who was still seated on his bed with his eyes glued to his phone. "He's not responding to my text messages."

Grabbing the cologne from the dresser and spraying myself with it, I sighed. "Why do you care?"

Scar's emerald eyes lifted to meet mine "Why do I care?" He asked as if the question offended him. "He's my friend, Jamie. You're supposed to care about your friends."

"Right," I countered with a whimsical smile. "Just like Trey cared about you when he had an affair with your girlfriend behind your back, and publicly shamed you in front of the whole school for being gay. Yeah, he's such a caring guy, isn't he?"

There shouldn't have been any reason why I held a grudge against Trey because I knew he would never have a romantic chance with Scar, but he deserved to feel like shit for the next few days. If the memory of kissing Scar made him ball up in a corner and eat himself alive, it brought me joy.

Scar grew silent for a moment, his lips pressing together in a straight thin line. "You're just saying that because you don't have any friends."

I knew Scar's attempt at a comeback was only a result of me criticizing his so-called best friend, so I let it slide. "I'm going to pretend like you didn't just say that. Now, you better get dressed before your mom comes back and sees you naked. Then who knows how long you'll have to stay without the booty?"

His eyes bulged out of their sockets and he shot out of bed in the blink of an eye, rushing over to the closet to get dressed.

**

I thought being away from vicious high school kids for two weeks would have made them forget about my relationship with Scar, because after a while, the story of two gay guys just didn't seem that interesting anymore.

But my thoughts were proven wrong when I waltzed through the main doors alongside Scar. If anything, the stares and whispers got even worse. Students stood in groups with their eyes fixated on our every move and foul words falling from their tongues, like they had been waiting for our arrival. We were a school of three thousand people and there had to have been a handful of gays among the student body but yet, Scar and I were the only ones who managed to catch everyone's attention.

Maybe it was because no one wanted to believe that Scar was really gay, or maybe they didn't want to believe that a weirdo like me was dating the former football star.

Whatever the reason, I didn't like this attention at all.

"This will die down, you know," Scar notified me as he clicked open his locker to retrieve his books.

I raised a brow. "Will it?"

Part of me knew it would never go away - not when the school made it their priority to kiss Scar's ass ever since he made the championship touchdown. By myself, I was fine. With Scar, we were a threat to everything Summer Hill stood for.

"I don't think I saw Trey," he said, trying to sway my mind away from the discomforting thoughts plaguing me. "You think he's avoiding me?"

I shrugged. "Possibly."

"Maybe we should stop by his place after school," he suggested with hopeful green eyes.

Even though I clearly stated my hatred for Trey, I knew Scar would never let it go. "Sure."

"Hey." Scar gently touched my arm and stared into my eyes with a look of reassurance washing over his face. "Someday, we'll be living in a big old city and all they're ever going to be is mean."

I squinted at him. "Did you just recite Taylor Swift lyrics?"

His eyes widened as he recognized his mishap. "No."

My lips curled into a smile. "You totally did."

He smiled back. "I got you to smile," he noted. "You look so much better when you smile, and you should still smile anyway because the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, ha-"

"Okay," I snapped at him with a fiery tone, but still managing to laugh. "You can stop now."

He rolled his eyes at me, then returned his attention to his locker.

He was right, for the most part. I never cared about what people thought of me prior to our relationship, so why did I care now? Perhaps it was because I cared more about Scar and how people saw him, probably more than he did.

A tap on my shoulder broke my gaze away from Scar, and I glanced over my shoulder at the source. It was a petite female with olive colored skin, short dark hair that coiled into tight curls, and piercings traveling down the length of both of her ears. Attached to her sides were two boys, who looked to be around my age - one with bright red hair, and the other with dark wavy hair pulled back into a low bun.

"Uh..." I pulled my brows together in confusion as I stared back at them. "...can I help you?"

The female spoke up. "I'm Charlie."

"Which is a boy's name, and we believe that she was born with a penis," the red head added.

Charlie snapped her hazel eyes to the red head. "Would you stop?"

The red head simply shrugged before he brought his attention to me and offered a small smile. "I'm Payton."

The last of the trio to speak was the rebel-looking dude with the man bun. "They call me Tommy." He flashed me a quick smile, but his attention drifted away from me and landed on Payton.

"We're thinking of starting an LGBT club for anyone who supports the community," The girl, Charlie, informed me as she handed me a flyer. "We can't really start it unless we have more people signing up and since you guys are comfortably out, I thought-"

Scar loomed over my shoulder and snatched the flyer from her hands. He inspected it for a moment, then frowned. "So, what? This is a club for cocksuckers?"

Payton took a step backward with his arms folded against his chest. "Who you callin' a cocksucker?"

Scar opened his mouth to respond, but Charlie beat him to it. "It is also a club for pussylickers, like myself."

I had no idea how I knew Scar would jump in excitement. "Seriously? You're a lesbian?"

Charlie smiled back at him. "I'm bisexual."

It was like he had completely took control of the conversation because he stepped in front of me. "Oh, yeah. Definitely. Sign me up."

Tommy reached across Charlie to poke Payton in the side. "Told you he wasn't really gay."

"God dammit," Payton cursed under his breath as he fished out a crumpled dollar bill from his pocket and handed it to Tommy.

Scar stuffed his hands into his pockets. "I didn't even know gay people existed at our school."

Charlie raised a delicate brow. "Then, how did you end up rolling around in bed with Jamie?"

A small laugh escaped my lips before I could stop it, causing Scar to look back at me with a deadly glare.

"If we already had gay people at school, then why is everyone making such a big deal out of me and Jamie?" Scar questioned them.

Payton rolled his eyes as if the answer was obvious. "Because you guys are hot, idiot." He shifted his gaze to me. "Is he normally this stupid?"

I tried to fight my smile. "He has his moments."

I watched as Tommy's intense black eyes scanned Scar's body, a small smile twitching into his face. "Can I just say? The way you two make love to each other is beyond passionate. That's like my life goal."

Both Scar and I snapped our attention to him. "What?"

Tommy blinked. "What?"

"How do you know about our sex life?" I questioned with an inquiring brow. I was starting to think that these group of people weren't as innocent as they looked.

Charlie's eyes widened. "What do you mean? Everyone knows about your sex life. The pictures were sent in a huge mass text message."A smile crept onto her face. "You should've seen our reactions when we saw it! So so hot, but so so passionate at the same time."

Payton's eyes lit up with excitement. "To be completely honest, I thought Scar would be the perfect power bottom, but I love that Jamie is able to slide into the submissive role."

I could've sworn my heart stopped beating at that very moment. My mind couldn't wrap around the thought of someone knowing about our sex life, which was supposed to be private? Not only that, but how could pictures be taken of us without our knowledge?

"Something tells me that you two have no idea what we're talking about." Tommy pulled out his phone and began to scroll through it. Once he found what he was looking for, he handed us the phone.

My eyes nearly fell out of my sockets when I saw the picture of the both of us having sex just a couple of nights earlier. The picture was taken from inside our room, and I couldn't think of anyone who could have possibly taken this picture. Amy and Jillian would never do such a thing, but they were the only ones who could.

"Who sent you this?" I demanded him.

Tommy rubbed his chin as he thought it over. "You know what? Payton sent it to me."

Payton perked up suddenly. "Yeah, I think I got it from some girl who got it from another girl who got it from a guy who got it from Francesca."

"Francesca?" I questioned just as my eyebrows rose to their highest point. I turned to face Scar, who was practically sweating bullets. "How the hell did Francesca get in your house?"

He rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "She may or may not have a key to my house."

This was the second time today where Scar just so graciously forgot to share important information with me. "Why does she have a key to your house?"

He shoved his hands into his pockets and rocked back and forth on his heels, refusing to meet my deadly gaze. "I gave her one when we were dating, and I guess I forgot to take it back."

I felt my muscles relax when I remembered the key around my neck that he had given me for Christmas. I had no idea how the idea got planted into my mind, but I had to ask. "Did you give her one of these too?" I asked him while twirling the key in my hands.

Scar's lips parted slightly as he stared at the key with a blank look washing over his face.

"Did it have your name on it, too?"

He still didn't respond. His eyes landed on everything but me, and that was the confirmation I needed.

"How many times do I have to tell you..." I muttered under my breath as my hands grasped onto the leather rope around my neck, breaking the clasps apart. "...that I'm not Francesca." I balled the necklace into my hands and pressed it against his chest, causing him to step backward in awe.

Tommy shook his head in disbelief. "You gave him the same exact present that you gave your bitch girlfriend?"

Both Charlie and Payton were looking at him with just as much disgust. "You don't need to be gay to know that's wrong," Payton commented.

Scar glanced down at the necklace that had fallen into his hands. "Jamie..."

"No," I spat. "Don't Jamie me. Fuck you, Patterson. Fuck you." And with those words, I stormed off.

I had gone through heaven and hell to get him to realize that Francesca wasn't as perfect as he thought he was. When I finally thought he let her go, it turned out I was just a replacement for her. He would order all of her favorite foods. We would go on dates that he had gone on with her. And now, he would buy me gifts that he had already bought Francesca. It was like she was controlling him without even trying.

There was no way I could have a normal relationship with Scar, if she was the reason behind everything he did.

Which was why I burst into the girls' bathroom as soon as I saw Francesca walk in. She turned around quickly and gasped at my presence, but I didn't give her the time to react. "You bitch."

Her eyes widened in shock and she took a few steps away from me. "What are you doing in girls bathroom?"

I wasn't going to let her change the subject. "What the hell is wrong with you? Why are you so mean? What did Scar ever do to you, besides love you unconditionally?"