"I don't get it."

I sighed at Vickie when she again refused to accept what I was saying. "We got this deal so we could kiss and it won't mean more than it."

"And you're okay with it?"

My stomach curled, but I looked back at her from my notebook I was holding on my knees and lifted one brow. "And why wouldn't I be?"

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe because you've been chasing after Justin since forever and now it totally looks like Nate is your rebound."

My hands clenched almost crumbling the paper, but I forced myself to relax before she noticed.

"I don't know what you're talking about." it came harder than I intent and she noticed judging by her frown, but I didn't give her time to lecture me some more. For a second the cold breeze curled around us in the silence of the backyard and I knew she was judging my snap, probably taking the wrong conclusions. In a second I'd closed my notebook and was on my feet, "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Oh, I..." just as the bell rang over our heads. Just in time. "Okay, bye then?"

I forced a smile her way, even though I wasn't feeling the best after her last remark and waved goodbye; heading out the backyard where we were spending the spare period since the teacher call in sick. Now she has the Literature Club and I had to go pick up the twins. Stomping harder than I should and mad, even though I shouldn't.

So what if Nate was my rebound? He made me forget about Justin in a way I couldn't describe, but not only that. His touch set my body on fire and turn my mind in a fluffy mush. It was like hormones through my whole teenage years had compact and decided to attack every time he was near me. I couldn't help it. And let's be honest, he was damn handsome so it kinda only added to it.

I stepped out the building not really looking where I was going as I put my belonging in my backpack and that caused me to almost bumped into someone.

"Oh shit," I barely managed to jump aside and finally pulled the zip with a nervous giggle. "I'm so sorry. I wasn't looking and- oh." my sentence was interrupted when I looked up to those blue eyes I'd been avoiding for almost two weeks now.

Talking about the devil...

"Well, hi." Justin grinned nervously and brought one hand to scratch the back of his head. The innocent hint in his expression spiked my anger. "So, how are you?"

"Fine." and went to sidestep him, but he stopped me.

"Hey, wait. If this is about Halloween..." I tensed, not having expected him to bring it up at all. "Look, I know I was an idiot, but she was having a hard time home, and I couldn't break up then. It wouldn't have been right and I thought-"

"It's none of my business." my anger was shifting into fury and embarrassment at how naive I'd been that night. I tried to walk away again, but again he wasn't having that. His confusion at my anger only made me madder.

"Hailey-"

I pressed my lids close, inhaling deeply in hopes to calm down the roaring in my chest.

Not now, Hails, there's people around. Don't create a scene.

Clenching my jaw I evened my voice. "Move along, Justin, or someone might see us talking."

He flinched. "Come on, don't be like that." but he remained unmoving from his spot blocking my path. Really? "Is this because of Herond?"

No, you idiot! It's because I know now you've done nothing but lying ever since the start. But after Vickie's moral lecture I wasn't in the mood of talking about my thing with Nate with Justin of all the people, so I just glared back at him.

"What about him?"

He eyed me like I was the irrational one. "What about- He's just gonna use you!"

"Like you?"

This time his eyes widened and he look around, worried for the first time about the flow of students leaving the building like myself. Now there was a good amount splashed in the parking lot. There it was, he's worried again that someone might tell Karen about this.

"I- I didn't." he finally hissed through his teeth sending me and accusing glance. "This is why you've been ignoring me? Because you're with him now?"

He got some nerve. My eyes narrowed and I crossed my arms to prevent something more aggressive to happen. "It's none of your business. And so what? Aren't you still with Karen?"

Justin gulped and I knew I was right. Surprisingly, it didn't hurt me anymore, it just made me mad. At him and myself. For having let him fool me for long. "That's different."

"How?"

"Well, I, um, we-"

A sudden honk made me jump out of my skin and we both turned to the now getting familiar vehicle that had stopped by our side. Through the lowered passenger's window Nate gave me a nod. "Ready?"

For a second I was dumbfounded, wondering what was he talking about since we both knew we hadn't made plans today; but for the way his gaze shifted at Justin I understand he was handing me an easy way out of this clearly uncomfortable-shifting-to-bad situation.

I smiled brightly at the realization, the turmoil in my chest shifting something calmer. "Of course." and pompously entered Letty, wickedly enjoying the frown and clenched jaw of Justin. Once in I waved dismissively, "See you," and slammed the door. A moment later, Nate was driving off again, sending a quick military salute at the blond guy as we passed him. Only then I let out a sigh and deflated against the car seat. "Oh, God, thank you. That was awkward."

"I can tell. Should I ask?"

"He's an idiot!" his brow perked and he looked somehow amused, but I was too exhausted to point it out so instead I brushed it away. "Nevermind. Nothing new, I guess." and realizing where I actually was I let out a soft laugh. I hadn't planned this at all. "If we keep this up, I'm gonna start to think of you as my unpaid personal chauffeur." I teased and he smirked sending me an equal teasing look as we reached a 'stop'.

"Oh, yeah, very personal if we keep this up."

My face burned at the way he twisted my words and smacked his arm, making him chuckled at my expense. "Shut up."

"Okay." but he kept that smug smirk some more making it impossible for my blush to subside. Especially now that my mind had drifted to this past week.

After last Friday when we agreed on this 'just kissing' it'd been weird. At school it all happens as it's supposed to, each one on their own, but then we'd met a couple days after classes and things gotten a bit personal... I shivered just remembering.

His voice snapped me out my flustered thoughts. "So, your place?"

I suppressed the sweet ache that spread in my chest, not having expected him to actually drive me more than a enough to keep this act up and shook my head softly.

"Can't," I looked down, tucking a lock of hair behind my ear while with the other hand, I slid the strand of my backpack so it slid comfortably in my lap. "I'm not exactly heading home..."

"Then where?"

"I have to pick up the twins from middle school." which is on the other end of the pavilion and field. Almost a good ten minutes walk, but barely a couple in a car.

He frowned but took the proper turn. "Aren't they old enough to go on their own?"

"Maybe..." I shrugged. "But mom wants me to pick them and I don't care, so it's fine."

"Alright."

Vickie and Justin's words echoed in my mind and despites my best intentions I find myself doubting. "Nate?"

He hummed, not looking at me as he drove. The lump in my throat grew bigger, knowing that if the situation turned awkward I couldn't make an easy escape since we were in a moving vehicle. When I didn't reply Nate glanced at me sideways before focusing back forward to make it properly out the lot into the street. "What?"

"I..." I swallowed nervously and with a small frown he reached out to take one of my hands in his. My heart doubled its throbbing.

"Hey, what is it?" the way his thumb caressed the back of my hand wasn't exactly making it easier. Sweet shivers shot from there up my arm.

"What are we doing?" I finally managed, more breathless than intended, but can you blame me?

Studying his profile I could see how his brows pursed further. "What are you talking about?"

"I mean, like this." I gestures around us with my free hand, refusing to let go the other and holding on that sense of warmth and support his hold was giving me even if it was rather light. "Us. What are we?"

"We're friends." he spoke slowly, remarking each word carefully, but I didn't know if it was for it to sink into me or because he was struggling to see where I was going with all this. Maybe both.

"Oh, you do this with all your friends?"

As if burned, he immediately let go my hand and grabbed the steering wheel, taking a turn to the left. A wave of cold disappointment bit my guts even knowing this was the most likely overcome to this conversation.

"What do you want me to say? We agreed with 'just kissing'." there was a hint I couldn't quite pinpoint in his voice, but I was sure it was in the line of annoyance. I gulped again, crossing my arms to cover how empty they felt now. "No commitment, no headaches. This is just about the fun of it. Isn't that what we agreed?"

"Not all that." I bit my lip glancing out the window at the passing street. "I'm just trying to settle the boundaries of us here-"

"First of all, there is no us." he cut me and it felt like a slap.

Okay, that hurt more than it should. Maybe because I wasn't exactly expecting such a straight answer.

I ignored the way my cheeks burned and frowned on my own. "Well, there is a you, and there is a me. So whatever we decided to do together will affect the both of us."

He almost grimaced. "Just... don't think about us like a couple. We're friends that sometimes make out. Is it that bad?"

It's not that it was bad, it was just weird. When I thought about friends I thought about Kevin or Olly... but what Nate awoke in me was nothing like what I feel with my other male friends, so it was strange to collect all of them under the same label.

I bit my lip. "So friends with benefits?"

I could see the corner of his lip curling upwards as he shrugged. "Yeah, exactly that. Is that boundary enough for you?"

I wasn't sure. I wanted to ask if he had many more other friends like myself, but I had made a fool out of myself and acted like some possessive wannabe girlfriend enough for today, so I bit my lip and instead went straight for what really bothers me about this.

"I just... I've told you, this is all new to me and I don't know what you usually expect of your friends, but I-" I blushed to the tip of my ears, not taking my eyes out the window, mortified. "I don't think I'm ready to do much more than what we've done for now. So- so if you expec-"

"Whoa, hold on." suddenly his hand reached out and this time rested casually on my thigh. "I don't expect anything. You're worrying way too much. This is supposed to be just for the fun. You don't have to do anything you don't wanna do. For now I'm fine with just kissing."

"For now?"

He sent me a smirk. "We'll see how it all goes."

I giggled "Cocky much, uh?" and pushed his hand out my leg as he chuckled and held the wheel again.

"Hopeful." my blush increased.

I knew he was more sexually experienced than I was -not that it was hard- but I really didn't want him to expect me to sleep with him now that we were doing this. Better settle things from the start. Maybe I was letting go but not that much, and knowing he'd been with girls like Trish and Nadia... it was hard to understand why waste time on me, but as long as he knew how I felt we'd be fine. Right?

"So," his palm left a cold spot on my tight when he took it to pull over the middle school building. Several students were already out, gathered in groups or walking away. "I take it as we can't hang out today?"

My heart tugged strangely at his words. "The twins will be home. Maybe some other time."

He faked a pout, mocking hurt. "Ouch. Just a chauffeur then? Shame."

I chuckled. "Yeah," and unbuckled myself. "Thanks for the ride. I-" My eyes then caught a red glimpse and my heart somersaulted. I have to do a double check, but when I did I couldn't help the smile and melting sensation inside me.

Tangled above the rear mirror there was the scarlet lace I gifted him on Halloween. The one I took from my prize. Knowing he'd not only kept it but also laced it there... I don't know, it did something in my chest quite hard to explain. Probably it just bothered him while driving or something and there was the nearest place to leave it so it stays there. In his precious Letty.

"What?" his brows drew together. "Why are you smiling like that?"

"Nothing, I..." I shook my head and opened the door, not wanting to remind him the presence so he had to take it off. I liked it there, it made me happy for some reason. "Just nothing. Like I was saying, thanks for the lift. See you, Nate."

But not even when I walked away towards the building could get rid of the grin nor the light sensation in my chest.

! :)

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