Hailey

Out of all the things I might have thought I'd be doing on a Saturday, doing the twins' cupcakes for the fair would have been at the bottom of the list. Well, more like a close second. Having Nate Herond here was certainly the most shocking about it all.

After the week he'd given me, I didn't exactly felt like enjoying his presence, but I was running out of time. These desserts needed to be done before mom's meeting end and came by to pick up the twins. They'd be spending the night at some friends house and the farm would be all for me. Usually I hate being left alone here -the old place was too huge and creepy to be alone once it gets dark for my liking - but the fact that the girls were coming over later for a sleep over was what made me have some hope that the day could lighten up.

It had been kinda uncomfortable... unsettling at least. Because it was pretty obvious he felt pity for me. Maybe he still believed I was a lost cause, lame and boring that got my heart broken once he stole my 'first kiss'. My teeth clenched each time the thought occurred me. Through the whole week I'd been receiving glances and mocks for what happen on the last game.

How dared he to treat me like that?

To insult me and belittled me?

And then go on and kiss me?!

I had the impulse to slap him over and over again for the spiteful feeling that he awoke in my chest every time I glance his ridiculously gorgeous face.

But he was helping me so I guess I had to swallow it down.

It has been a surprising sweet gesture from him. And he was being suspiciously kind. I guess this was part of his intent of me to forgive him or whatever. Great Nate Herond couldn't stand someone being mad at him. Even if that someone was lame and plain me.

But if I was being honest, one good thing came out last Friday. Justin suddenly remembered I was there. It was as if he was jealous or something.

My stomach fluttered at the memory of how attentive he'd been this week. I mean, even after last's year fiasco, we'd kept in touch, as friends; but there was obviously something else. There was this constant pull between us. This obnoxious chemistry. Why couldn't he just acknowledge it and broke up with Karen?

Just as I finished putting the last item on it's place and was placing the muffins on the plate when someone honked from outside and I glance at the clock. Mom must have finally arrived. I lowered carefully the last dessert and took off the kitchen gloves before heading out... only to be frozen as soon as I stepped into the living room.

"What are you still doing here?" I scowled, but Nate didn't even glance this way, playing whatever game Shane had on. I sighed, folding my arms. "I signed your paper. You're free to go."

"It's fine, Hails." intervined Shane frantically pressing buttons as neither of them took their attentions off the screen, poking my irritation. "I told him to stay."

Of course. "And I told him to go."

"Please let him stay." pleaded my brother in that tone that melted my heart. "Please. We're having fun."

Okay, now I would be the heartless sister that didn't let him spend some precious time with his idol. It was obvious I was giving in when I hesitate and my fists clenched at Nate's smirk, fleetingly glancing at me smugly before turning back to the screen.

The honk went on again and I remembered mom was out there. "Whatever. You need to leave too so... Ted!"

"Coming!" fast steps rushed down the stairs and in seconds he was there, sliding his jumper on. "What?"

"Mom's here." I handed him the plate as we heard Shane huffed in disappointment and shut down the game.

"Bloody hell." he cursed ignoring my warning stare and get up, glancing at Nate, unsure. "You'll come back, right? Another time."

"Sure."

"I won't be counting on that." I answered instead, my chest clenching at his careless response.

How dare he? On the first place, he shouldn't even be here. Yes, he'd helped with the cupcakes, but that was it. I hadn't forgiven him. Not for the insults, nor for the stunt he put on the other day.

I watched the twins exited the front door and entered mom's white Fiat, waving her as they speed out. Now there's only me and the jock.

Great.

I glanced the clock to find it was near 6 o'clock. It won't be long 'till the girls came by.

I better start preparing it all.

"Well," I began turning back my steps and letting the front door ajar, inviting him to let himself out. "Thank you so much for everything but it's getting late and you might be required home."

"Seriously?" Nate scoffed getting up from the couch as I pass by and towards the kitchen again.

Right, he was once of the cool kids. I bet such things as curfew on a Saturday evening didn't exist for him.

"I mean a party, binge drinking or whatever you guys do." I waved it picking my phone from the counter, my heart skipping a beat when the unread messaged appeared. From Justin.

A sweet heat spread across my chest. As I'd said, through this week he'd been more attentive again. Sweet and funny. I also caught him staring at me more than an average friend should which didn't exactly help me snapping out my daydream.

Seriously, couldn't he see that I could make him happier than Karen? I felt horrible pursuing a taken guy, but if he's shown interest as well they musn't be that fine, right? I mean, last year... everything that happened was initiated by him. Never by me. But he was still hesitating to break up with her.

It hurt bad and whether a part of me begged me not to fall in the same hole twice, another couldn't but clung on the hope that this time he'll realize he should be with me instead, and not in a relationship that clearly wasn't fulfilling for at least one of the parts.

: What r u doing?

: Not much. getting ready for some girls night

The answer came quick.

: nice. U think Ill pass as a girl? ;p

I smiled, feeling that sweet warmth in my chest increased, but the sensation was soon cut by a shudder that went up my back when I felt a presence behind me.

"Really? Ames?"

I jumped outta my skin at the soft brush of his breath right into my ear.

With my heart pounding madly, I spun pressing my phone to my chest and stared wide-eyed at Nate, who'd been leaning just over my shoulder to glance the device. Much closer than I thought.

How had he moved so much without me noticing? Was I so absorbed in Justin?

"What?" I pressed myself to the cabinet, hating how breathless I sounded.

"You do get along well, uh?" his brows rose gesturing to the phone, not bothered at all by the sudden lack of space between us.

Unlike me. I was hiper-aware of his closeness, body heat and scent.

Did he have to be so attractive?

Unwanted memories of the kiss came back inevitably and spiked my nerves further.

My eyes narrowed. "None of your business. Move."

The sharpness of my own words almost made me cringe, but I keep my face neutral as much as I could... though I'd been told I suck at acting. By the way his jaw clenched I guessed he didn't appreciate my harshness either.

"What's your problem?"

"And yours?" I retorted back, pushing past him since he seemed determined not to oblige my demand. "You got your paper signed. I've already thanked your help. Don't you have somewhere to be?"

"Damn it, Hailey." he grabbed my wrist and turned me again before I could reach the stairs. "I just... " He looked frustrated, upset. And I could only eyed him carefully, not really knowing what he wanted. He sighed forcefully, letting go and sliding his hands through his dark hair and gave me a hard look. "I've been trying to apologize the whole afternoon, but you're making it fucking hard."

A pang hit my chest. "Apologize for what exactly?"

"You know it."

"I don't. There's a tone of things and-"

"For everything, okay?" he groaned, not at all succeeding in sounding apologetic. "Why are you being this difficult?"

My hands fisted. "Difficult, uh? Well, you can add that to the list of names you have for me."

I heard him cursing from behind as I made my way upstairs towards my room. I got one text from Vickie saying they were already on their way so I better get everything done by then. I put the box from under my bed. Some of the games were already in from last time, but I also pick the cards from my desk and several music albums.

Taking a moment to considerate the weather I also pick a couple blankets. Now the paper box was filled to its rim. Picking it up and carry it would be tricky.

"Whoa." My eyes snapped up at Nate, leaning on the door frame and casually glancing around the room. My room. I felt very exposed. As if opening a window to my soul. What was he still doing there? "Are you moving out or something?" he joked with his tantalizing half smirk.

Considering the conversation minutes ago, his intent to break the ice wasn't exactly well received. I rolled my eyes. "Some friends are about to come. So..." he didn't get the hint.

"Really? What would you guys do?"

What's up with him? I didn't know, but it was getting my nerves, so I deadpanned. "Something boring and lame, probably. I wouldn't stick around to find out."

"Hailey." Nate cringed as his words were thrown back at him. "I didn't mean that."

My insides curled painfully. It wasn't just how hurtful it was at it's time. Or even how humiliating. It was also the fact that he knew it would hurt me. He used it to harm me consciously. And, yeah, maybe he was down and upset that night, but that was low, nasty.

But I was done going in circles with him. It was tiring.

"Whatever. It's done. Why does it bother you so much? It's not like we're friends or anything."

I pick up the sweater from my bed and put it on. It was Matt's, big and comfy. Maybe not the most flattering, but tonight I wasn't trying to impress anyone. When my sentence was met by silence, I turned towards the quarterback and found him frowning at the wall, deep in thought with one arm bend and tensed scratching his nape absently.

Sensing my gaze, his eyes moved to meet mine, green pools at full force. It was hard not to feel goosebumps.

"I know..." he cleared his throat, speaking steadier next time. "I know. But I don't like people getting mad at me."

"Well, then maybe you shouldn't do stuff to upset them."

"Look-" he stepped closer and I immediately rose my arms, suddenly very aware that we were alone in the farm and considering past experiences... I gulped, the heartbeat wildly in my ears.

"I swear if you kiss me again-"

"I won't!" his eyes widened as he stepped back again. "For fuck's sake. See? You're being extremely difficult. I'm not that much of a dick."

I barely managed to suppress a scoff. Could have fooled me. And bent to try to pick up the box... key word being try. Damn it! It was heavier than I thought.

No, no, I need to make a dramatic exit so Nate feels like there's no other option for him than leave.

But judging for the bad concealed snicker, I guess it wasn't working.

"Need some help there?"

I blushed. "No. I got this." but I so not got it. Why did I have to fill it so freaking much?!

"Okay, stop. You're gonna hurt yourself." and effortlessly Nate took the box from me. I blushed harder. Here I was almost panting while he looked fresh as if taking a walk with the bloody box against his chest. He frowned at my gaze. "What?"

"You can't be nice to me when I'm trying to stay mad! That's not how it works."

"Well, then maybe you shouldn't stay mad." he mimicked my previous response to him and my guts churned further at the hint of amusement that curled his mouth, no matter how much he tried to keep it at bay. Nate cleared his throat. "Where do you want this?"

Seeing there was no point in arguing other than wasting time I bit my lip and pointed the door. "Downstairs. To the barn."

His brows shot up in surprise. "You have a barn?"

I grinned sarcastically, well aware of how obnoxious my place was. "This is a farm, isn't it?"

"Right."

The barn used to be lame, only used as a warehouse, but Matt and I changed that. Four summers ago we worked on it, cleaning it and repairing the worst parts until it was decent enough. The funniest part was decorating it. The walls were a mix of all the leftovers from the store since we didn't exactly have savings at the time. So it was colorful and original, lets leave it there.

We still used it as a storehouse in the back, but in piles and organized behind a partition. With time we've filled the main part until it look pretty decent. We got the couches when Tay's neighbours moved away, the old arm chair from one of Matt's fellas, a coffee table, a mini bar, a CD-I, speakers, and several other things that slowly had filled the place.

"Damn." Nate left the box by the door, glancing around in awe as I shifted on my heels. "This place is so cool."

"Yep." I smiled a bit.

He stepped further inside, whistling as he examined the place. "You can throw some parties here."

It was about fifty feet behind the farm, enough to have intimacy and since we're kinda out the town's limits there's no problem with the neighbors. Matt used to use it for his parties when he was still in Roosevelt High, but now it's where my group and I usually hang out.

"Mhm, I guess."

My phone beeped and I looked down to see it's Logan Dawson about something to do with the Daily. I typed in a short answer, not really in the mood to talk about work at the moment.

"Are you still into Ames?" Nate broke my thoughts with the abrupt question, making my heart skip a beat.

I looked up, mouth dry to find him still examining the place, as if he just didn't ask something as personal as that.

"It is none of your business."

"Why do you like him so much?" he wondered instead, ignoring what I just said and rolled his eyes. "He thought the Atlantic was an Atlanta lake. Crossing the pond must has a whole new meaning for him."

I pursed my lips to keep myself from laughing. The whole school remembered how Justin screwed up big time some years ago in the academic decathlon. Someone had even uploaded it to YouTube.

But I wasn't going to laugh at his expense. No way. Instead, I cleared my throat and casually tossed my hair over my shoulder, putting my cell phone in my pocket.

"Well, geography is not his thing. So what? He has other qualities."

"Oh, yeah?" Nate stopped, sensing my defensive tone and smirked, amused. "Like what?"

Yeah, Hailey. Tell him. But the suddenness of such a question left my mind momentarily in blank. "Well..."

"What?"

"I don't know!" I blurted, noticing how my cheeks lit up. Why did he insist so much? He raised an eyebrow, waiting for an answer, and although he didn't owe it, my mouth thought on its own: "He's nice." Apparently that humored him further.

"Nice?"

I nodded. "And sweet."

"Please." he threw his head back with his arms crossed and a smug smile. "Nice is the nice way to say boring."

There he was again, attacking. "Guess we're fitting then. And no. Nice as in you can talk to him. He knows how to listen. And- and he's funny too."

"I'm funny."

I huffed. "Not really." his eyebrows shot up at my disagreement and I couldn't help a small laugh. "Sarcastic? Yes. But you're not funny, are you?"

"If you mean I'm not a clown, then you're right. I'm not." he grumbled and now was my turn to roll my eyes at his grimacing expression.

"You know?" I shook my head at his constant pricking. Was this even his business to begin with? I think not. I'd endured enough shit about me liking Justin already, from my friends and my conscience. I didn't need his judgmental contribution as well. "I am not surprised that you criticize him. He has many things that you cannot even understand."

The air filled with new tension and he stiffened sensing the shift as well. But his next words sounded cold and malicious and pierced me like daggers: "A girlfriend, for example?"

Boom!

With that, he striked right in the center of my chest, knocking all the air out.

Karen. Always Karen. I already knew, it was something that was very clear to me, but somehow I liked to think platonically about Justin. To fool myself into believing that, someday, maybe I won't be the second plate anymore. Nate, however, was there to bring me down from the cloud and remind me that in real life someone like Justin Ames was impossible to achieve for someone like me...

Proof was last year's disaster.

And that despites everything Justin still chose her over me.

I'm always the second guess. Always.

The moment those words left his mouth a flash of regret crossed his eyes, but the damage was already done. And he was right. As usual, I could only feel like shit about this because it was my fault all along.

But, men, it hurt.

Nate must read it on my expression, cause his expression softened. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"

"Of course you did."

"I didn't." he ran a hand through his hair. "I just don't understand..."

"Well," I blurted out, having had enough of all this already. "There is nothing for you to understand, is it? My private life is none of your business. Do I ask you about Nadia?"

He shrugged.

"She's hot."

I blinked, not having expected an actual answer and not at all having expected that. "What?"

"She's hot." he repeated carelessly, as if it was no big deal at all.

"You..." I frowned and mentally shook my head to wrap my mind around what he was saying. "You like her because she's hot?"

"I don't like her." Nate corrected me with another shrug. "We have our fun because she's hot. And because she's damn good at doing bl-"

"Alright!" an intense blush rose from my neck to the tips of my ears and instinctively took one step backwards. How did we end up talking about this? What the hell was he still doing here? I shook my head. "That's a lot more information than I ever wanted."

Nate smirked. "How cute. Now that you know things about my private life, it's only fair if you open up as well." I shook my head taking another step and his malicious smirk grew. "Oh, I see. Do you want more details? Well, every time-"

"My Gosh, no!" I took another stride back and looked around, but the place was empty.