"Esme wants you to come inside." Emmett says coming to sit next to me on the roof of the house.

"I would rather die." I say simply. "Besides no one wants that outcome I promise."

"I mean what's the worst that can happen?"

"I kill her." I deadpan. "Admittedly that's only bad for her."

"Has she always been this bad?"

"Pretty much, she got worse when I came out." I say leaning back on my hands. "But she was always you know not there but somehow thought she was better than dad and just so ugh." He doesn't say anything just nods. "You know when I was younger I used to let her get to me so I would try to change to make her happier but she never was."

"Go on."

"And it's like why weren't we good enough for her to care about?" I sigh before I lay completely back on the roof. "Like I'm supposed to sit down there and act like I didn't hate myself for years because of her? Or like I didn't only learn to cook so we wouldn't starve?" I look up at the stars for while. "I just wanted a mom sometimes." We sit in silence for a little bit.

"You never said anything about being infertile." He says after a little.

"Yea it was a combination from doing coke and the car crash." I kinda wish I could have a joint. "By then I didn't want kids anyway so it didn't matter to me."

"You wanted kids at some point?"

"Just a little. You know just like oh a forever companion, but then you have to take care of them and I'm not meant for that." I shrug a little. "It wasn't in my cards."

-

"I'm just saying if anything I don't go to this stupid lunch dinner thing and then you come home change and we go to the club." I say to Bella while I work on her hair and Viv works on her makeup. "Win win for everyone."

"You're coming to this dinner."

"I don't even eat!"

"Irrelevant." I groan and she just giggles. "Besides everyone else will be there."

"Yes drinking and making me wish I still could."

"I can't drink." Vivian reminds me patting her belly.

"So we'll be in hell together." I deadpan. "Plus the guys won't be there either, they get to just show up at the club."

"I still can't believe half of them agreed to come." Bella mumbles. "I get Conner and some of the pack but Kit and Sam?"

"Everyone likes to party Bella."

"Besides strip clubs bring everyone together." Vivian says smiling. "And my work is done."

"Do you think Edwards going to a strip club?" Vivian and I look at each other before we burst out laughing.

"I'm serious."

"We know." I say still laughing. "Bella he thinks 99.999% of women are airheaded whores."

"Besides he barley got you I can't imagine him doing anything but making the strippers uncomfortable." Viv says. "So today we party, tomorrow you get married and then you get off my bladder."

"Don't be mean to my bean." I tell her. "If he's comfortable let him be."

"You only say that cause you don't have to pee every 5 minutes and you can still see your feet."

"I don't ever have to pee. I'm a corpse." I deadpan and she groans. "Okay it's time to go and face the boogeyman."

"That's an insult to the boogeyman." Vivian mutters and we make our way out.

-

Sitting at the table I miss my ability to get absolutely shit faced, because it would be so much easier to deal with Renee and Jessica's ideas of fun bachelorette conversation. I resist the urge to tear one of their throats out not from hunger but from pure hatred. I think I would rather be forced to be Alice's friend again over this bullshit.

"Take a shot for every jab you're moms thrown." Vega whispers making me and Lani giggle. "It's insane you and Bella came from her."

"You're telling me." I say sipping my drink that taste like mud. "Besides if I took a shot every time I'd end up dead of alcohol poisoning, within 10 minutes or less."

"No wonder you did fucking coke." Lani says glaring at Renee as she stabbed her salad.

"Amen to that." I say and Vega and I clink our glasses. "At least it's almost over then we can go to the club."

"Thank god." Leah mumbles from across the table and I wink at her. Gotta love supernatural hearing sometimes.

-

"Ok remember you guys go to the shop and pick up Kit and change." I point at Lani Vega and Alex. "You guys go to my house change and get the boys and then us three are going to the Cullens to change and get rid of my mom. Ok go time."

-

"Hi how much would it be for her to get a lap dance on stage?" I ask a stripper named Cinnamon while pointing at Bella.

"Depends which level you want." She says and begins explaining them. "She's the bride right?" I nod. "Level 3 and it runs about $50 each dancer, the dj will call her name out too."

"Can I get three dancers, and her name is Bella Swan."

"You got it cutie." Cinnamon says. "Find me after and I'll give you a dance." She winks before sashaying away.

"Of course the girls are hitting on you." Emmett says laughing as he wraps his arms around me.

"Jealous?" I ask and he laughs. "Come on let's go wait for Bella's nightmare to begin."

"This drink is so good try it." Kit says handing me some purple drink, I take a sip of the drink that taste like mud and hand it back to him. "Amazing right?" I nod and he laughs.

"Alright bitches bros and non binary hoes please welcome to the stage miss Bella Swan." Bella turns to look at me and I nod clapping. "Now miss Swan here is getting married tomorrow, so let's give her a proper send off into marriage." There's cheers from everyone at the club.

-

"I need a nap." Bella says while I carry her upstairs after a very fun party. "Will you stay with me for a little?"

"Always kid."

"Good."

-

I miss sleeping, but no let's be forever young and unable to sleep. So now I can hang fairy lights in trees so my sister can marry her dream man or whatever Email qualifies as.

"Need a hand?" Andrew asks appearing on the branch across from me.

"Yea here." I toss him a thing of lights. "So what's up with you?" He snorts.

"Oh well you know nothing much just helping my dead sisters vampire ex set up for her sisters wedding."

"My oh my what a life you live." He laughs and starts working on the lights. "So really what's up with you? Cause something tells me you didn't come out here to hang lights."

"Are you reading my mind?"

"No, would you like me to?"

"No." He sighs and continues to string lights. "How'd you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Move on so fast?"

"Oh well it wasn't easy." I say beginning to add flowers. "It took a lot out of me to even start. There was the tattoo and then the coke and the accident."

"Coke?"

"You know cocaine. I got into a little and then within a few weeks I was doing so much I'm surprised I didn't od."

"I didn't know that."

"I wasn't exactly proud of it." I say shrugging. "You don't have to get over it anytime soon or ever you know."

"Yea, but it feels selfish."

"To live unhappy when she didn't get to live right?" He nods. "Yea it's like this guilt that you're the one left living."

"Do you ever feel like that?"

"Yea, I get sometimes when I'm really happy. Or when I accomplish something. And it's like why is it fair that I'm getting everything I want but she couldn't."

"Yea like that." He mumbles. "Like it's wrong that I'm still alive."

"Technically you're not alive." I joke and he laughs. "There's no right or wrong way to heal. And whatever you feel is justified. And if you need help well I'm here."

"Thanks Cel."

"Anytime kid."