Posting this update while sunbathing on a beach in Indonesia. I think this proves the love I have for you, don't you think? And to any of my readers from Indonesia, much love from me to you!

x Noelle

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Provokes an explosion.

have to ask – food or sex?"

Theo grinned. New Year's Eve was a far more subdued event than Christmas had been. But Blaise and Hermione had prepared dinner, and he'd just gotten his third helping of roast ham when Pansy asked the question.

"I don't know," he answered honestly, before turning to his best mate. "Draco?"

Draco didn't even spare him a glance. "Food."

"Really?"

"I need food to fucking live, don't I?

"Logically, that's correct. But say that you must go the rest of your life with either food or sex. Which will it be?"

"Food."

"Really?" Theo's lips tugged upwards in a sly smile that almost mirrored Pansy's opposite him. "So let's say a really, really attractive brunette – " and now Theo looked pointedly at Hermione, who was in the kitchen with Blaise, " – threw herself at you and you'd still pick food?"

"Food," but neither Pansy nor Theo missed the way Draco's eyes flickered to Hermione for a brief moment.

Theo chuckled. It was a good thing that Hermione was busy preparing the pudding and couldn't hear the conversation they'd just had. He was certain her blush would be off the charts.

Theo had just started on the new portion of ham when the skin on his arm suddenly erupted with a slow, familiar burn. He stilled, a slice of ham still hanging off his fork, and glanced over at Draco with wide eyes and a sinking heart. Pansy too looked worried, and Blaise was heading out of the kitchen towards them with Hermione in tow.

"Draco?" Blaise started. "Is it – "

"Yes." Draco jerked his head towards their Death-Eater robes on the coat rack. "Go."

The other three immediately went to grab their robes and masks, then apparated to Malfoy Manor.

Draco lingered, if only to give her a reassuring nod. "We'll be fine, Granger."

She went over to him and slid her arms around his waist. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

He thought about it. "Get the potions ready. We'll probably be pretty cut up when we get back. And save Theo's food for him, he'll probably be starving as usual."

She nodded and reached up to brush her thumbs gently against his cheeks. "Stay safe."

"Not likely. It's an occupational hazard," Draco smirked briefly, feeling the knot in his stomach dissipate when Hermione let out a tiny laugh.

"Then just do whatever you can to come back."

"Always, Granger."

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Draco had vaguely guessed that the Dark Lord was to launch a surprise attack on the Order. He'd expected Christmas – since the Dark Lord liked celebrating the fucking holidays in style, and death was the best way to go about it – but New Year's Eve was no surprise either.

The mission was different this time. It wasn't about finding out information. Instead, it was about staying alive and taking as few lives as possible. The latter proved an almost impossible task since the Dark Lord was present.

Draco stood next to the Dark Lord, with the Order's headquarters some distance away. Behind them stood the Death-Eaters that Draco had picked out just a half hour ago. The three Lestranges were there – Bellatrix, Rodolphus and Rabastan – along with Guthrie Rhodes; all of whom were top-notch fighters. There was Yaxley and MacNair, two members of the Peverells whom Draco hoped would get killed in the crossfire. Theo and Blaise were the last two, and they would watch his back.

He was actually more concerned about Pansy, who was undercover this time round. She stood some distance behind under a disillusionment charm. He hoped that the Dark Lord wouldn't detect her presence.

"My lord?" Bellatrix stepped up, taking her position on the other side of the Dark Lord. "We're ready."

The Dark Lord glanced over at Draco, who nodded silently. "Bring Harry Potter to me. I want him alive," the Dark Lord said, as he drew out the Elder wand from his cloak.

Draco stared at the wand. Did the Peverells know that their leader had one of the Deathly Hallows? Was their final plan to usurp the Dark Lord after they'd located the other two Deathly Hallows?

He shook those thoughts aside and headed to the building. He took his time and made sure that he entered the same time that Pansy did. As they neared the front door, he felt her fingers brush against his. "Any last words of advice?" she murmured.

"Yes," his voice was low and almost inaudible, loud enough only for her to hear. "Survive."

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Hermione spent New Year's Eve alone.

After the Slytherins had left, she'd packed the remaining food, washed the dishes and laid out the potions that Blaise and Pansy had given her for Christmas. When she was done, she counted down the hours to midnight.

And then it was New Year's, but the war was still raging on.

It wasn't until a good forty minutes later that Pansy suddenly apparated back into the apartment along with a heavily wounded girl. Pansy herself looked a little cut up, but the other girl was unconscious and bleeding terribly.

Hermione gasped. "What happened?"

"I accidentally splinched her." Pansy set the girl down before running to the inventory. "I was supposed to watch out for the boys. But I thought it'd be clever to save the Order members and I tried it on her. She'd already been hexed, so she struggled a lot when I tried to apparate her."

"Who hexed her?"

"Draco, of course." Pansy came back out and shook her head at the shock on Hermione's face. "Come on, it's a war and the Dark Lord's leading this mission. Be thankful that it wasn't an Avada."

Pansy was right. There was no room for sentiment or mercy now. Hermione handed her a couple of numbing potions. "You might need this."

"Thanks." Pansy stuffed the potions in her bag along with the other empty memory phials she'd gotten, before picking up her wand again. She cast another swift glance at the girl on the floor. "Take care of her."

"I will. Be safe, Pansy."

Pansy gave Hermione a quick hug. "We'll be fine," she assured her, before apparating out of the apartment altogether, leaving nothing but a dusty, bloodied silence behind.

Hermione's eyes drifted over to the girl on the floor. And then her instincts kicked in and she immediately began to work. She remembered briefly how Blaise had taught her that Dittany worked best on splinched body parts. Draco had gotten a bottle of it from the Black Market awhile ago, and she used some of it now, after clearing away the blood with a quick Scourgify.

"You're going to be fine," Hermione whispered, when the girl let out a pained cry. "You're safe now. Everything's okay."

Hermione soon realised that there was something easier about healing. It wasn't like fighting, where it sent fear rushing through her veins. It calmed her, because she'd spent so many years suffering that it was all she wanted to do to get better. And now that she was better, it only made sense for her to want to help others feel better too.

It wasn't until Hermione had cleaned the blood off and eased the swelling on the girl's face when she suddenly realised exactly who this girl was. And she paused, her eyes widening as she took in the girl's familiar features – the blond hair and the fairy-like tilt of the girl's shut eyelids.

She dropped her wand. Then she made a mad dash into her room in search for the Hogwarts yearbook. She flipped through the pages, found the picture she'd been looking for and went back out.

An expression of disbelief flitted across Hermione's features as she stared down at the girl, hugging the yearbook tightly to her chest. A person she knew very well from her past had finally returned back into her life, and she had no idea how to feel about it.

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Draco didn't blink as a disarming spell flew his way.

It bounced off him as usual – it always did; and he shot a killing curse right back at whoever had shot it at him. The person promptly dropped dead, but Draco didn't even turn to look at his victim.

It was always easier that way. Ignorance was almost always the alternative to a life engulfed with guilt and shame, and Draco was already struggling to breathe in the waters of the latter.

When the Dark Lord took down the last enemy in the room, he turned to Draco. "Do you know what the Order's main weakness is?"

He didn't even have to think twice. "They show mercy where it's not needed, my lord."

"Precisely." The Dark Lord's lips stretched into a faint smile. "Now, where are the others?"

"The main hall, my lord. They're still fighting."

The Dark Lord nodded and headed out of the room, stepping on the dead bodies that were in the way. Draco avoided them the best he could, but the blood was everywhere. Back in the main hall, the fight was going strong, but it turned into a bloodbath the moment the Dark Lord entered.

Midway through, MacNair picked his way over to their leader. "My lord, it would be wise to leave some of the Order members alive so we could get information out of them."

Draco shot a quick glance at MacNair. Surely, this wasn't something to do with the Deathly Hallows, was it?

The Dark Lord's lips tightened. "Are you questioning my decisions?"

"No, my lord. But information about the Order, or what's left of them, is always useful and – " The words died on his lips as a sudden curse flew towards them. At the very last second, Draco lifted his wand and cast a strong shield to dispel it.

"Do watch your back, MacNair," Draco's smirk widened when the Dark Lord shot a murderous look at the other Death-Eater for nearly putting their lives in danger. "I might not always be the fucking knight in shining armour."

MacNair went pale. "My lord, I had no idea – "

"Finish the fight. You'll receive your punishment when this is over."

The Death-Eater went away. Once MacNair was out of earshot, the Dark Lord glanced at Draco. "We'll settle for capturing some of the members, since Harry Potter is nowhere in sight."

"Yes, my lord."

And Draco went off to spread the message to the others, shooting a silent killing curse at a badly injured person on the way, because he knew that being captured alive by Death-Eaters and then tortured for information was a fate far worse than death.

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It wasn't until four when Theo finally returned back to the apartment. Hermione jumped up eagerly, relieved to see him, because Pansy and Blaise had already returned an hour ago. But one look at Theo's face and she shrank back, realising that he'd worked himself into a fine temper.

Theo cast a swift glance at the sleeping, injured girl on the sofa, and the expression on his face grew thunderous. He brushed past Hermione, heading straight for Pansy and wrenching the mug of hot chocolate away from her, banging it violently down on the table. "What the fuck was that?"

"Whoa, calm down – "

"Shut up, Blaise. Draco's going to be equally as furious when he comes back. He had it all planned out but you botched it!"

Hermione cast a muffling charm on the sleeping girl and headed towards the Slytherins. Pansy looked livid as she jumped up. "I botched it? I was trying to save their arses – "

"You brought an Order member into our flat – "

"She was injured!"

"Then you leave her there to die!"

"No," Hermione couldn't stop the word from leaving her mouth. Theo turned to her, his eyes softening slightly when he saw the look of horror on her face. Hermione swallowed, and looked pleadingly at him. "She's – she's a friend, Theo."

Theo faltered for a moment, before he shook his head. "Fine, let's not go there," he said and narrowed his eyes at Pansy. "Let's go to the part where you used Obliviate on the Order members after the Dark Lord changed his mind and asked that we capture them instead – "

"Theo – "

" – you too, Blaise, why the hell were you using Stupefys instead of Avadas? What the hell was that about?"

Blaise blinked. "The Dark Lord told us to capture them, not to kill them! If anything, I ought to be asking why you and Draco were killing people when the Dark Lord said not to. Don't think I didn't notice, Theo – the two of you killed countless of people on the way out – "

"Because it was the simplest way!"

Pansy snorted. "You mean the cruellest – "

"Do not go there." Theo's voice went dead quiet. "We did the best we could."

"The best you could? The 'best you could' involves taking innocent lives when they could be spared?"

"Because it's a better fate than being captured," Hermione said.

The other three turned to Hermione and she shrugged. Her mind reeled with memories of her time in torture. There were days when she wished she were dead. Far too many days, in fact. The only thought that kept her going was Draco, but not everyone had the head Death-Eater searching for them.

"If they're captured," she continued, hesitantly, "they'll be tortured – for information. The way I was. And – and not everyone's as lucky to be saved. So you kill them." She took a deep breath. "It's a form of mercy."

There was a heartbeat of silence.

"Finally! Someone gets it," Theo said at last. He sighed and headed to his room. "I'm going to bed. Talk to Draco yourselves when he gets back."

"Wait, Theo," Hermione stopped him. "Do you want some potion for your bruises?"

He shook his head. "It's fine, Red."

He slammed the door shut behind him. Hermione turned to Blaise and Pansy, who wore matching looks of unease on their faces. She knew that they were probably berating themselves for doing what they considered was right. And in a moral sense, it was the right choice.

But the war was no place to make moral choices.

Hermione tried to ease the tension with a faint smile. "I'm sure Draco would understand."

"Of course he would." Blaise ran a frustrated hand through his hair. "We just wouldn't be able to forgive ourselves if they're tortured to insanity."

Hermione felt a shudder go down her spine at his words. "Maybe they wouldn't be tortured," she said instead, trying to be optimistic about the situation. "Maybe – maybe the Order will come to rescue them."

"Highly unlikely." Pansy didn't sound convinced at all.

Hermione fell silent again. When the other two returned to their room, she poured the remaining hot chocolate down the sink and washed the mugs. She checked on the sleeping girl several times before she returned to the kitchen. Each minute felt like an hour as the seconds ticked by and Draco didn't return.

It wasn't until half past five when he did. He looked exhausted, scratches and bruises on his skin, but none too severe that she couldn't fix. His eyes widened when he saw her. "Granger, what – "

His words were cut off when she threw her arms around him and buried her face against his neck. "I'm so glad you're back," she whispered. "I'm so glad you're safe."

His lips curled up in a brief smirk against her skin, but he held her equally as tightly, perhaps too tightly – but it was better than a grip loose enough to let her go anyway. "I did make you a promise, Granger."