《Pumpkin Patch Princess》CHAPTER NINETEEN: Singed Hair Is So Unattractive
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Jessaline sashayed over to my friend and squeezed his arm. "Geoffrey Oakdale, look at you," she purred. "Someone has been working out."
Geoff was trying not to look too pleased. "Oh, well, I . . . it's training and all . . ."
"What," I spat. They both turned and looked at me. "Are. You. Doing. Here."
Jessaline's eyes lingered on the pumpkin stains on my pants. "Nice to see you too, Noelle."
"I said, what are you doing here?" I seethed inside and I must have been seething outside, too, because she took a step back. "You've been following me, haven't you? First Viridian, and then our carriage. The one you left us broke down on me."
Her eyes flickered to the pumpkin with amusement. "So I see. But it looks like you were able to replace it with your typical rustic flair."
"Aha! So you admit it!" I shouted.
"Easy," Geoff said, grabbing me. "I'm sure she has a good reason for being here."
Jessaline frowned at his hand on my shoulder. "Of course I do, not that it's any of your business. Sloane gave me a few days off and I wanted to explore and relax."
"Explore and relax?" I repeated. "In the same places where I just happen to be working?"
She rolled her eyes. "Please, Noelle. Not everything is about you."
That did it. I lunged at her and Geoff had to drag me into the tavern to keep me from committing murder with my bare hands. "What is with you?" he scolded, when we were out of earshot. "I know you hated each other in school, but we're not on the playground anymore."
"This is more than that. My trainer's reputation is at stake," I snapped. Quickly, I filled him in on everything: Jessaline eavesdropping on me to get into C.A.F.E., Maud and Sloane's rivalry, and my suspicions about Jessaline and Sloane trying to sabotage us.
"I wouldn't put it past her," Geoff said, sighing. "But you don't have proof. Look, you're my best friend. I'm on your side. But you play into her hands every time you get mad."
He had a point there. "All right, but that doesn't stop me from hating her guts," I grumbled, then took a deep breath to calm myself. "Okay. Let's go in."
The tavern looked like a grounded tree house, with walls and floors made of thick wooden beams. The place was empty except for some old men playing a rowdy game of chess in the corner. All of the furniture, from the chairs and benches to the stools and tables, were half the size of what I was used to.
Two small men stood behind the counter. They came up to my waist and had bright, watchful faces half-covered by impressive dark beards.
"What can I get you folks today?" one of them asked. He had sharp blue eyes that took in every inch of our appearance. "We've got a butternut bisque that pairs nicely with our house ale and fresh-baked bread."
I opened my mouth to speak, but was interrupted by a huge sneeze from the other dwarf. It splattered the counter in front of him and Geoff and I exchanged glances, hoping he wasn't the cook.
"How many times have I told you to cover your mouth when you sneeze, Rhinus?" the first dwarf groaned. "It's rude and disgusting. My apologies, young people."
"It comes on so fast, I can't help it," Rhinus mumbled.
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I handed Madam Chu's letter to the first dwarf. "This is for you. My trainer, Maud N. Lee, was supposed to deliver it to you, but she's ill."
"Ah, my good friend Lin." His face brightened at the name on the envelope, then filled with concern. "What's wrong with poor Maud?"
"She worked herself too hard, but she's resting now and should be fine in a few days."
He gazed up at me. "And you are . . .?"
"Noelle Simpkins. I'm an intern at C.A.F.E. This is my friend Geoff Oakdale."
"Call me M.D.," the dwarf said, shaking our hands. "Too bad you just missed our brothers on their way back to the mines, or you might have met them too. I know Narco would have liked to ask you about your internship."
"Yeah, if he could stay awake long enough," Rhinus snickered, wiping his nose.
M.D. gestured to two mushroom-like stools at the bar and we sat down, Geoff sideways because his legs were too long to fit under the counter.
"Have some cider, on the house," the dwarf said, pouring two mugs. "You must have come a long way."
"She did. I go to knight school up on the mountain," Geoff told him.
M.D. eyed him. "A knight-in-training? So you're one of those fancy fellows waltzing around town, showing off your armor to all the girls?"
Geoff turned red. "No, sir," he said indignantly. "We're much too busy learning how to joust and protect the royal family."
"My brother was just teasing," Rhinus told him. "He does that."
"Geoff grew up in Indigo, like me. I'm visiting him," I explained.
M.D. wiped the counter his brother had sneezed on, glancing at Geoff. "So where are you taking your friend today?"
"The mines, probably," Geoff answered. "We've had a lot of classes down there this week, looking for dragon eggs and . . . what?"
Both dwarves were glaring at him.
"Do you have a license to be down there?" M.D. demanded. "Why are they letting young boys into those dangerous mines?"
Geoff bristled at being called a young boy. "My teacher has a license."
Rhinus sneezed again, this time into his sleeve. "Forgive M.D. He's sensitive because of all the hoops we had to jump through when we first moved here," he explained. "We had to file ever so much paperwork before Her Majesty would even let us work in the mines, and that was with our friend Madam Chu's help. It's not fair that others get in without having to go through the same process."
"The queen's prejudiced, that's what," M.D. snapped. "Letting trainee knights gallivant through the mines while we dwarves had to do a whole song-and-dance before we could even work there. And," he added, turning to me for sympathy, "we have to give her 50 percent of whatever we find!"
"That's pretty unfair," I agreed.
"It's not my fault I get to go down there whenever I want," Geoff said loftily. "But I don't dig any of that stuff up. Everyone knows it's worth your heart to take jewels from those mines without permission."
"You mean worth your head, don't you?" I asked him.
Rhinus smiled. "Here in Citria, criminals get their hearts cut out."
Geoff waved his hand in dismissal. "That's just a turn of phrase. No one's been executed around here for years."
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All the talk of mining reminded me of my request. "This might seem weird to ask," I said politely, "but if I don't have a license, how do I go about getting some of that special glass? The kind that's very hard to break?"
M.D. raised his eyebrows. "You mean diamond glass? What do you want that for?"
"I want to make shoes," I said.
The dwarves burst into incredulous laughter. "What would one do with a glass shoe?"
"It would be a lady's shoe. For a party or a ball. To dance in." I explained about Mom's business and how we had always experimented with unusual materials.
"Well, if you're determined, I'd say diamond glass is your best bet," Rhinus said, sniffling. "It's very strong. They use it for windows in cold regions with the brutal winter wind."
"It has a very high melting point," M.D. added. "It takes a lot to get it to soften, so you'd need a special kind of fire." He thought for a moment. "Our brother Fuzz would be the one to ask. He has quite a way with melting things."
"Geoff and I don't have a license. Would we be able to go and find him?" I asked anxiously. "I don't want to get my heart cut out before I complete my internship."
The dwarf cracked a smile. "It will be fine if you're with our brothers. They're at the western entrance." He glanced at Geoff. "I trust you know where that is, Sir Lion Heart?"
"Yes," Geoff said sullenly.
I thanked them, but M.D. waved it off. "Glad to help any friend of Madam Chu," he said. "And I hope you'll stay with us tonight instead of traveling home in the dark?"
I promised him I would. Rhinus opened his mouth to say something, too, but was overtaken by a series of explosive sneezes that drove us out as quickly as our feet could carry us.
"Told you dwarves are a grumpy bunch. They hate trainee knights," Geoff grumbled. "Just because we spend a lot of time in the mines, they think we're challenging their territory."
"Who?" Jessaline asked sweetly. She had been waiting beside the door.
I groaned, having forgotten about her.
"Really, Noelle, your animosity toward me is interesting," she said, before turning to Geoff. "Are you going to the mountains? I'd love to see them. You wouldn't mind taking me, too, would you?"
Geoff shifted his weight from one foot to the other. "It's really up to Noelle."
I watched as she turned her too-innocent eyes back to me. Sloane had probably told her to stay on my tail – and speaking of Sloane, where was she? Spying on Maud? It was kind of pathetic how they thought that shadowing us was the only way to get ahead.
I laughed. "Sure. Come along, why don't you?"
Jessaline's eyes narrowed. "Really?"
"The more, the merrier, is what I always say. You wouldn't mind if we took your carriage? Geoff and I will need it to carry . . . stuff in when we come back from the mines."
I could practically see her ears twitching. "Stuff?"
"Yep. But I can't tell you what it is. Maud told me to keep it a secret."
Geoff cleared his throat. "If you're talking about the d . . ."
"No, don't tell her about the d . . ." I covered my mouth. "Good thing I caught myself. Maud would be so angry if I told you."
I tried to keep a straight face as I walked quickly to the C.A.F.E. carriage. Before they caught up with me, I took a moment to feel around under the seats. My hand hit the outline of a small black case . . . Maud's case, the one containing the anti-frog solutions. This proved, without the shadow of a doubt, that Jessaline and Sloane had stolen our carriage.
So that's how they want to play, I thought darkly.
"We're not going down into the mines, are we?" Jessaline was asking Geoff.
"Of course we are," I spoke up. "That's where the d . . . oh, goodness. I need to stop talking. After you, Jessaline." I held the door for her with mock courtesy.
As she climbed in, Geoff grabbed my arm. "What are you planning? Are you going to mention the diamond glass?" he whispered.
"No. I'm going to mention something that's big and breathes fire."
His eyes widened. "You're going to lure her into a dragon's nest?"
"No, of course not! We just have to make her think we're looking for one."
We climbed in and the carriage took off. As we passed my pumpkin, I made a mental note to leave the top on next time and to enlarge it before I hollowed it out, so it would look prettier. I imagined driving it home to Indigo and seeing the look on Dad's face.
"Noelle?" Jessaline was looking at me expectantly.
"I'm sorry, what? I was thinking about the dragon." I shut my eyes in horror. "Oh good lord, I've done it. I've spilled the secret. Maud is going to kill me." I leaned forward. "But you promise not to tell anyone, right?"
Jessaline focused on me so intently that she failed to notice Geoff's bug-eyed expression. "A dragon? What does Maud want with a dragon?"
"To train it, of course. Horses are so yesterday. Having a carriage pulled by a dragon is the next big thing, and it's Maud's idea, and it's going to make her famous. The Council is going to love it."
"That's ridiculous. Dragons can't be tamed."
I gazed at her sadly. "Such doubt. Haven't you noticed Maud's got quite a way with animals?" I asked. "Remember that frog I had during Trainee Week? She turned him into a prince. Just imagine what a cinch potty-training a dragon would be compared to that."
"That's ridiculous," Jessaline repeated, but she sounded less certain. "So she sent you here to get a dragon? From the dwarves?" She glanced at Geoff, who tried to look like he had known everything all along. He was a terrible actor, but luckily she was too distracted to notice. "What would dwarves know about dragons, Geoffrey? Isn't that more your department?"
"Well, dwarves work in the mines. And . . . dragons' nests are there," he said awkwardly.
Jessaline gave a slow nod. "Yes, I see. They work in close proximity to these creatures."
"But Jessaline, I have to warn you. I've only met Maud's dragon once," I told her. "I don't think he's well-trained yet. He knows not to breathe fire on me or Geoff. But he doesn't take kindly to strangers, so he might not like you very much."
She chewed on a manicured nail. "Really? What might he do?"
"Well, the fire thing, for one. Singed hair is so unattractive, so stay back," I advised. Outside the window, the trees were going by at an angle. The mountain was so steep, I was practically lying down on the back of my seat. "And of course, the talons. Sharp as a butcher's blade and three times as long."
"Three times?" she echoed faintly.
"Well, maybe four. I don't really know. Deathgrip is pretty big as far as dragons go, and he's only a baby."
"Deathgrip?" She pounded against the carriage wall twice and the horses stopped.
"Perfect timing. We're here." Geoff threw open the door.
I jumped out after him. "Coming, Jessaline? I'm sure Deathgrip will get used to you in no time. Singed hair and talon cuts haven't killed anyone yet, have they?"
She crossed her arms. "You know what? I think I'm going to stay here. I don't have very good hiking shoes on," she said, and that was not a lie. Her flimsy flats probably wouldn't last five minutes of walking.
"Okay, whatever you want," I said cheerfully, slamming the door in her face.
"Deathgrip?" Geoff snickered, as soon as we were out of earshot.
"I'd like to see you come up with a better name on the spur of the moment."
The carriage had stopped on a plateau on the mountainside, like a landing on a tree-filled staircase. Just ahead was a gaping hole in the side of the mountain. We peered inside.
"This is the western entrance. There are dozens more all over the mountain," Geoff said. "Some go deeper than others, some are dead ends. Some take you so far down that you couldn't get out again even if you tried."
The darkness looked so complete, it made my heart race. The goblin kingdom in Viridian had at least had a little light, as creepy and green as it was. I could tell that this was a musty, smothering darkness that would feel like being showered with ink.
Geoff lit a lantern he found just inside the opening and stepped through. Before I followed him, I glanced back at Jessaline, who was watching from the carriage window.
I snickered. "How much do you want to bet she'll be gone when we get back?"
"How much do you want to bet she's leaving as we speak?" Geoff replied.
Sure enough, the minute we entered the cave, we heard the sound of the carriage turning and then the horses' feet retreating down the mountainside. We looked at each other, shrugged, and continued into the darkness.
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